Ronan: To the Moon and Back

Rae's startled awake by a loud crash coming from the first floor. Her eyes fly open, landing on the digital clock next to her bed; 6:58 am. She groans. It's her day off dammit. Rae weakly wipes the sleep from her eyes, shifting and stretching out her body with the covers tangled around her legs before sitting up. Another loud crash alarms her, finally realizing with a surge of fear, that it's too early for her mother to be home yet.

Glancing around her room looking for anything that can be a makeshift weapon, her eyes lands on a clear umbrella sitting in the corner of her room. So she gets up, grabbing it before quietly and cautiously tip-toeing downstairs. This intruder isn't very discrete, not with how they're making all sorts of noises in the kitchen.

Rae presses herself against the wall just before the entrance, hoping her any sort of ninja skills comes in handy. Taking in a deep breath, she peeks around the wall and sees nothing. She leans back, shrugs and throws caution to the wind. She abruptly jumps out from behind the wall, umbrella weapon raised in the air. Apparently said intruder was further in the kitchen than she thought, and they turn the same moment Rae jumps out; both yelping in surprise.

"Bloody hell, Harry!" Rae curses loudly. "How'd you get in here? Actually, why are you here?"

Harry eyes the umbrella warily, frying pan in hand. "What do you mean? We were here all night. What were you going to do, poke our eyes out?"

She lightly smacks his hip with her weapon of choice. "I thought you were robber or -wait no. You didn't answer my question. How'd you get in here? Why are you holding a frying pan and, why are Zayn's glasses on the counter?"

Harry chuckles, placing the frying down on the stove. "You're rather observant in the morning."

"You broke into me house." Rae mumbles, pouting as Harry makes mocking hand motions to her umbrella.

"First, my little umbrella wielding pal, you were the one who put the key in the flower pot. Louis called us around two in the morning. Told us to get our arses over here otherwise he'll take back our Christmas gifts, but by the time we got here you were already sleeping. So Zayn and I decided to stay the night. Liam and Niall were here too, but they were called for a radio interview and had to leave."

Rae's mouth falls open into a little O, recalling her panic attack last night. She finally drops the umbrella on the island, leans forwards and drops her face into her hands. "I forgot. M'sorry."

A moment later, she feels a hand rub soothingly at her back. "Wanna talk about it? Louis was beside himself. Almost drove back in the dead of night. In a snowstorm." Harry informs her. Rae makes a sudden sound, but Harry reassures her. "He didn't though. We tried convincing him to stay a few more days. But he's stubborn and worried about you so, he'll be back tonight."

Rae nods and misses the way Harry bites his lip in concern. "Do you not want to talk about it? It's just..." He pauses to take a breath. "Your, erm, your chest was a bit red and I just want to make sure you're alright."

Raelyn peeks an eye out first, then drops her hands, leans up and places one hand on Harry's and squeezes. The tiny show of appreciation doesn't go unnoticed; Harry returning a smile. She swipes her thumb over his small cross tattoo.

"I'm all good now, yeah." She tells him softly. "Ronan is- he can be quite curious. He's so smart, you know. He notices things most four year old shouldn't. He noticed that the twins weren't there and just started asking questions. Like why this and why that and if God hates him. I guess it just got to me and gave myself a bit of panic attack." She shrugs. "But thank you, really, for checking on me."

Harry wraps one arm around her shoulder, pulling her in for a side hug. "You're our friend Rae, remember? Of course we'll check on you. Would've done it with or without Lou's threats." He chuckles softly and picks up on the fond smile Rae's attempting to hide.

"He really cares for you."

"I know."

"You really care for him."

"Yeah...I do."

"Do you like him?"

"Harry-"

"Because y'know, if two people like each other, normally they do something about it. Like a date, or I don't, something really crazy like confess their feelings."

Rae untangles herself from his arm. "Harry, please. It's not like that. I care for him, yeah. Quite a lot really. But I just- I can't-he just. He just got out of a serious relationship and...what? Why are you looking at me like that?"

Harry's got this smirk playing on his lips, eyebrows raised and expression expectant. "You, my darling, are so oblivious."

"Hey!"

"The both of you. Crazy kids these days."

Rae laughs despite herself.

"You like him."

"Well, if you knew then why ask, hmm?"

"So you can admit it to yourself, obviously." Harry rolls his eyes.

Rae falls silent, stomach twisting in anxious knots. "Don't tell him, please. There's just so much going on and Ronan-"

"It's alright, Rae. Of course I won't. Now, go find Zayn for me so I can make breakfast."
With that, Harry playfully pushes her out of her own kitchen. Maybe winking a little at the information he got out of her.

***

She finds Zayn just up the street, behind the big oak tree on the outskirts of the little playground; too early for any families. He's leaning against the trunk, fag held loosely between his fingers, leather jacket zipped up tight. He's looking rather exhausted, probably way too early for him to be up as well. Rae can sympathize as she leans against the trunk next to him.

They don't speak, having come to an unspoken agreement since the first time Rae stood next to him outside the Hospice. Instead, she smiles up at him. She sees the way his eyes flicker down to her chest where her own blue coat is unbuttoned, and lifts the smoking cigarette to his lips. Zayn nods once, raises his fist and gently bumps it against her temple.

It's a kind gesture from Zayn. Like he understands what went through her mind the night before, what a hell of a week it's been. It's his own strange comfort he's offering her. He finally smiles back at her, then moves his arm to lock around Rae's neck. He pulls her into his shoulder. He smells like smoke and the faint sent of his cologne and maybe a little like the Christmas tree wallflower Rae has plugged into her room.

They stay like that for several minutes, until snow flurries begin to fall from the sky and Zayn mutters a "too bloody fucking cold".

When they get back to the house, the heaters been turned on, and Rae insists Zayn warms up by taking a shower. After pushing a grumbling Zayn towards the stairs with a fresh towel in hand she grabbed from the wash room, Rae walks into the kitchen. Walks into the kitchen and sees no breakfast, but instead catches sight of Harry slipping a white envelope beneath the fruit bowl on the island.

"What's that?" Rae asks curiously.

Harry balances slightly, snatching the envelope back up and hiding it behind his back.
"Nothing!" Harry lies quickly. "Just a letter."

Rae raises an eyebrow. "For me?"

"Um-"

"Or Santa? You know Christmas is in two weeks, yeah? I'm fairly positive the fruit bowl can't magically send your letter to the North Pole."

"For, erm, your mum?" Harry shrugs sheepishly.

"Right." Rae reaches forward around Harry, as he circles around her.

She glares playfully at him. Then they're locked in a funny little keep away dance for several moments before Rae successfully snatched the white paper out of his hands. Smiling triumphantly, she takes several steps back, opening the unsealed envelope.

The smile she has on her face from the small victory, slowly fades away as her fingers file through a bulk pounds. She can feel her mouth go dry, her face numb. Rae fells a surge of affection in her heart, the same time a spasm shoots through her chest, if only briefly. She counts once, twice, and on the third recount, the feeling in her face comes back.

Harry had sunk quietly onto one of the stools at the island, resting patiently on his elbows for the shock girl to say something. He hadn't planned on Rae finding the money until he and Zayn were long gone from her house.

"Harry." Rae finally breathes out. She says his name so soft, it takes Harry some delayed seconds to realize she spoke. Rae looks up at him, blue ocean tides meeting sea grass green. "This...this is £5,000 pounds."

Harry clears his throat, shakes out his hair, and answers, "Yes, it is."

"You," She shakes the money slightly, "were leaving this under the bowl."

"Yes."

"You were putting five grand underneath fruit. Here. For me? For us? Oh my God, are you the one who anonymously paid our bills?" Harry nods slowly. Rae holds out the money. "I can't take this."

"But...you need it. Louis told us-"

"Harry." Rae's sharp tone cuts him off. She feels something like anger flutter in her stomach, going as quickly as it came. "Louis shouldn't have said anything. I can not keep this."

But Harry is shaking his head, curls flying wildly with the motion. "I'm not taking it back." He states firmly. "We want to help you and your mum. You both work double shifts, yeah? That'll help for a least a month or two. I wanted to cook breakfast this morning. Kinda difficult when there isn't any food in your house. So you keep it, or give it to your mum, but I'm not taking it back."

Rae began shaking her head halfway through his little speech. "It's too much, Harry." She says weakly, as another spasm clench her chest. If she could, she's pretty sure she'd be tearing up right now.

"It's not enough." He corrects her. "We each put in a grand. It'll help keep your electricity on, and food in the fridge and heat because its winter and I don't want to see you turn blue because of it. Plus Ronan's hospital bills and..." Harry trailed off, words dying at the sight of his friend.

Rae's chest is heaving silently, her hand free from the money pressed firmly against her chest, languidly circling her skin. Her blue eyes locked on the pounds. Harry get up slowly, making his way around the counter to stand in front of her. He gently takes hold of her hand, long fingers wrapping delicately around her small wrist. He pulls her hand away from her chest, rubbing his thumb soothingly over her knuckles.

"It's too much." Raelyn repeats, pressing the envelope to Harry's chest, between his swallows tattoos. "Too much. I don't understand why you want to help us."

Harry chuckles. "Isn't it obvious, Rae? Someone's got big heart eyes for you."

Rae is shaking her head again. Because he can't. He just can't.

Harry sighs. Knows that Louis' feelings for Rae and vice versa is a subject for another day. "You're our friend, Raelyn, and we deeply care for our friends. We'd help them in anyway we can. So please," Harry brings her hand to the envelope on his chest, pushing it back from him, into both her hands, "just take it? Louis feels- we feel like we can't do more."

"Being here is enough." Rae tells him, stepping back to shove the money under the fruit bowl. "I've told him that."

"Yeah, well, Louis can be so thick at times." Comes Zayn's voice from the doorway of the kitchen.

Startled, Rae turns to glare at him. "Aren't you suppose to be in the shower, mister?"

Zayn shrugs. "He wants to help you, Rae-Rae. Like genuinely help you, because he genuinely cares for you and genuinely l-"

"Okay. Alright. We all want to help." Harry cuts him off abruptly.

Rae turns back to Harry, a small smile spreading on her lips. She lifts her weight on her tip toes, leaning forward several inches to place a gentle, warm kiss on his cheek, right where his dimple is hiding.

"Thank you, Harry." Then she lowered herself down.

She walks over to Zayn, pecks a grateful kiss on his cheek as well, and actually pulls him in for a hug. He still smells like smoke and he still feels cold. "Go take a shower you, tit."

Zayn bops her nose which makes her scrunch it up like, in Louis own words "a bunny and it's just damn cute okay." Which Zayn has heard about several times before.

"Language, my dear." Zayn teases, then quickly runs out of the kitchen avoiding Rae's swipe of her hand.

Harry fondly shakes his head at both of them. His phone buzzes in his back pocket, flashing Louis' name across it. He hands it to Rae without answering, smirking as she sticks out her tongue at him.

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Notes