Dark Star

I knocked on the employee door at the back and sheepishly smiled when I saw Jake on the other side.

“He’s inside.” He said and I nodded as I made my way into the bar. I got a glimpse of Harry sitting in the back booth, looking as though he was wearing the same clothes as last night.

He was nursing a drink and it took a moment for him to look up.

“Hey…” I said. When he didn’t reply, I sat opposite him. My heart beat a little faster when his gaze fixed on me. His hair was tousled and he looked slightly bleary eyed as he took a swig of his drink.

“Ali.” He said. “I don’t think we can do this anymore.”

“What?” I said flatly.

“This…” Harry stumbled over his words, unable to articulate himself for a few moments. “This… you and me… working together.”

I didn’t know whether to yell or sigh in relief. For a micro second I had thought he was about to break up with me. As I gazed at him, he refused to meet my eyes and I counted to three before responding.

“You don’t want me to help you out anymore?” I asked. I thought back to all the things I had done for him. I had meticulously organised everything behind the scenes… so much so that all Harry had to do was walk on stage and perform.

“So, you’re firing me?” I added.

“Kinda.” He said, lowering his eyes. “I just think it’s better if I start taking more control over what I’m doing.”


“Fine.” I said lightly.

“Are you sure?”

“Harry… if you didn’t fire me, I would’ve resigned anyway.” I fibbed.

Our eyes met for a moment before we began to laugh. He reached for my hand and gently caressed it as our laughter subsided.

“I’m sorry about the way I acted.” I told him, although I could still feel the sting of coming face to face with Dr Miller. She had really gotten under my skin, but I was valiantly trying to be the bigger person. I didn’t want my jealousy and anger to be the reason behind losing Harry. I watched as he took a swig of his drink and wondered if I was compromising myself and my feelings once again. Did it hurt that he no longer wanted me to be a part of his career? A little. I had just started to really enjoy the process and the feeling that I was a part of an exciting and creative project. Working in an office was fine for paying the bills but was not really fulfilling my creative side. Nor was it satisfying my burgeoning business acumen. I had a taste of what it was like working in Harry’s world, and now I had given it up with a simple: “Fine”.

“Wanna have breakfast?” Harry asked.

“Isn’t it almost lunch time?”

“I dunno.” Harry countered with a crooked grin. I rose from my seat and linked hands with him as we walked out into the bright sunshine.

“You never really said where you were last night.” I said. “I popped over next door but Robin said you had been out all night.”

I could feel him stiffen slightly before he opened the car door for me and then slammed it behind me. I sat tensely in the passenger seat and waited for him to sit in the driver’s seat. I could tell I had hit a nerve, but I was not going to back down this time without an answer. He revved up his car but remained silent.

“Where were you last night Harry?” I asked again.

“Where do you think I was?”

I tried to hide my annoyance at his reply and gazed at him steadily until he looked at me.
“I had to see if she was okay.” He said quietly.

“Who?” I asked impatiently even though I could easily guess the person.

“Catherine.” Harry replied, facing forward to grip the steering wheel.

“Dr Miller? You spent the night with your therapist?” I cried.

“She’s also a friend.” Harry said. “And she was hurt. I never should have told you about us… I wanted to let her know she had nothing to worry about…”

“She should be worried. She’s meant to be your therapist… not your fuck buddy!”

“And who are you are going to tell?” Harry shot back.

“Nobody.” I said. “I just don’t understand how you could care about her feelings… more than mine.”

I couldn’t help it. My face crumpled and before I knew it, I was crying.

“Heyy…” Harry said soothingly, reaching over to embrace me. “I don’t care about her more than you… I was just angry and needed to vent…”

“So, if I hadn’t asked you… would you have told me?” I couldn’t help but ask.

“Nothing happened. I swear it. I went over to apologise and then I just needed a place to crash. There’s nothing going on between us.”

I wiped away my tears and tried to compose myself. The whole situation was exhausting… I felt like all I did was dodge bullet after bullet. I believed him when he told me that there was nothing going on between himself and Dr Miller, but it was yet another thing I had to bury and ignore or else it would eat away at me until there was nothing left anymore.

“Let’s just go.” I murmured and he let go of me with a reluctant look on his face.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you.” He said quietly.

I didn’t answer as we drove away. We ended up at the same Thai restaurant from our first date and silently ate our meal. He checked his phone a couple of times and perked up when Jack sent him a link to a review of his performance the previous night. It was a good review and he spent the rest of lunch dissecting every word.

“I’m happy for you, Harry… I really am.” I told him. And I was. This was just what he needed.

The boost to his self esteem made virtually made him light up and I couldn’t help but smile. I had witnessed such a change in him, from the beginning when even the idea of performing threw him into a panic, till now where he was positively beaming. The lunch ended on a positive note and he was recognised by a few people as he left the restaurant. He greeted the fans with an ease I had not seen before. He snaked his arm around my waist as he bid them goodbye and turned to look at me.

“I don’t know how I got here.” He said. “But I like it.”

Little did I know, that statement would turn out to be the understatement of the century.

Notes