Dark Star

“Ali.” Harry’s voice made me blink and I looked over to see he looked distinctly uncomfortable. “Ali, you remember Miller erm Dr Miller, don’t you?”

“Yes.” I said stiffly. I cleared my throat before shaking her hand.

“Hello Ali.”

“Miller found out about the gig.” Harry told me. “Not sure how, cause I’m pretty sure I didn’t tell her.”

“It was not hard to find out. There are posters all over town.” Dr Miller said. I smiled at her response, but she did not smile back. Her face was hard to read and her tone was even; she was so self-possessed, I had no idea what her thoughts were about the situation.
Harry opened his mouth to respond before Jake took his arm and whispered in his ear.

“I’ll be back.” Harry said before being led away.

I turned to face Dr Miller and smiled.

“Did you enjoy the show?”

Dr Miller pursed her lips and paused.

“If Harry had bothered to tell me about this, I can assure you I would have advised against it.”

“And why’s that?” My response was instant and defensive.

“Because he should not be performing. He’s not ready to face the public.”

“Really? From what I just saw, he’s more than ready to face the public.” I said hotly.

“My professional advice has always been-” She began, but I cut her off.

“Professional!? From what I know, your relationship with Harry has been far from professional.” I blurted

It was not hard to see that my comment stung her as she virtually paled and shrunk away. Harry appeared by my side at that moment.

“Ali.” He said simply. The look of deep disappointment on his face stopped me from going further and we both silently watched as Dr Miller walked away.

“Let’s go.” Harry said grimly, taking me by the hand and marching out to the back door. I did not say a word as I allowed him to lead me to his car. Only once the last car door slammed did Harry explode.

“What the fuck was that about?”

“She started it.” I grumbled. “All I did was ask her how she liked the show and she started in on me about how you shouldn’t have performed, how you’re not ready… what does she want you to do? Sit at home all day and see nobody but her?”

“It’s not like that.” Harry’s voice had lowered but sounded just as angry as before.

“It is like that.” I insisted. “Well it was like that until you met me. Therapy is meant to help you change not keep you in the same situation as before you started. Don’t you understand that?”

“What I don’t understand is why you’re trying to start stuff up tonight of all nights.” Harry seethed.

I opened the car door to leave but he reached over to stop me.

“I want to get out.” I told him.

“Don’t worry. I’m taking you home.”

The drive home was excruciatingly quiet and so thankfully within minutes we were in front of my house. I did not even glance at him as I scrambled out of the car and made my way into the house. I heard the engine rumble and Harry’s car zoom down the street. I wondered if he was going to return to the Black Cat to celebrate, after all he had just performed a great gig. Or was he heading Dr Miller’s way? Once that thought invaded my mind, it was hard to get it out and I spent a sleepless night wondering where he was, but too proud to even try to call and find out.

*****
I did not hear from him that night and I was not that surprised to hear from him the next day. I did receive a call from Jake the following morning asking me why Harry disappeared the night of the gig.

“Didn’t he come back to the bar?” I asked casually

“No, I saw you guys leave and I thought you’d be back… but you both just left. I tried calling Harry but he didn’t answer. I had reporters wanting to talk to him about the gig but he was nowhere to be found.”

“I’m sorry I can’t help you.” I told him.

“Have you guys had a row?”

“Kind of.”

“To be honest, I’m a little disappointed… he deserved to celebrate… it was a cracking gig. It would have been nice if he stayed around…”

Jake continued to ramble on about how the reporters wanted to know if this was Harry’s comeback gig but I tuned him out. A part of me was still angry about how Harry had defended Dr Miller and had exploded at me, but another part felt bad. Maybe I should have kept my big mouth shut after all. I know I disliked her, but maybe it wasn’t my place to confront Dr Miller. As I hung up the phone, Jake’s words echoed in my head.

“He deserved to celebrate.”

With a sinking feeling I realised Harry had missed his after party. He had worked so hard and had been so nervous about the performance but the night had ended on a bad note. Although I could not help but feel angry about his whereabouts last night, I could not help but feel guilty too.

I spent the morning moping around the house. I didn’t even check my phone, I somehow knew Harry wouldn’t be in a hurry to get in contact with me. But as the day wore on, I felt the increasing need to get in contact with him. I tried calling, but there was no answer. I knocked on his front door, only to be met with his stepfather who told me Harry was not home and had no idea where he had gone. I was about to give up when I received a text message from Jake.

He’s at the Black Cat in case you’re wondering.

I was out of the house within minutes driving toward the bar. I knew the bar wasn’t open. It was Sunday and not even midday, so I knew the bar was closed. I knocked on the employee door at the back and sheepishly smiled when I saw Jake on the other side.

“He’s inside.” He said and I nodded as I made my way into the bar. I got a glimpse of Harry sitting in the back booth, looking as though he was wearing the same clothes as last night. He was nursing a drink and it took a moment for him to look up.

“Hey…” I said. When he didn’t reply, I sat opposite him. My heart beat a little faster when his gaze fixed on me. His hair was tousled and he looked slightly bleary eyed as he took a swig of his drink.

“Ali.” He said. “I don’t think we can do this anymore.”

That’s when my heart sank.

Notes