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I Won't Let Go

Summary

"Jess you can't do what you used to be able to do! At least not right now."

"I am not going to let it win! I can't and I just wish you would support me no matter what I do!" I yell back with tears in my eyes.

"LOOK AT ME!" He yells at me once again but now his eyes are filled with tears that are now streaming down his cheeks.

I didn't work this hard to get everything that I could ever want only to be taken away from me because of this goddamn disease.

"Jess, do you know how hard is it is to see you struggle?!? I don't want to have to watch you coughing up blood during your games. I need you to get better and I don't think continuing to go on like this is your best choice."

"Look, who knows how much time I have and the odds are that I am just going to die and I want to die in one of two places and one of those places is not the hospital bed Niall."

"Jess! Please, stop saying that!"

It hurts me to see him this upset. He has bags under his eyes, he looks like he hasn't slept for days, his cheeks have tear streaks running down them and his hair is a mess. All I can think of is this is all because of me.