
Fanfiction Help
Abused: Lee_Loves_Looouiiss
(7) I didn't see any spelling or grammar, which is great. I also like how you don't rely on dialogue to make your chapters longer. You explain how she's feeling well, and she has a lot of the thoughts of a girl in an abusive relationship. I also like how you didn't dramatize her relationship with the boys, they didn't all obsess over her and act like she was the most important thing in the world which is refreshing from other stories (where they make the boys fall at her feet). The spacing of your paragraphs was great at first, but you have to remember to put a full space in between each line of dialogue. Some of the chapters are spaced properly, others aren't. It's a bit distracting. My only real request to the story is to know more about Niall and Rachel's friendship. We know that they're bestfriends, but other than that, there's nothing that really shows just how close they are, you know? I could be wrong, I didn't read the entire story.
The topic of abusive relationships is kind of overused, but I can't really fault you for it because it's well written and believable. But, you have a strong ability to write. The conversations and dialogue aren't very captivating so my advice is to make it slightly more entertaining. Even though it's a serious story, it's never bad to make your readers laugh by something silly she or one of the boys said. :)
Over all, you definitely have a talent to write, you're creative and have proper spelling and grammar (which I love). It isn't my kind of story per say, but I can definitely tell that your readers enjoy it.
Keep on writing, love!
xx, Elle
Number of chapters: Only two but third might be uploaded but the time you see this.
Complete/Incomplete: Incomplete
Would you like the review private or public? Private please (I'm nervous!)
Thank you so much! x
8/8/14