All Again

CHAPTER SIXTY ONE
BECCA

Then

Hours later, I was flipping through the pictures on my camera of London’s Big Ben.
Downstairs, Harry was waiting on me to finish getting dressed.
The day was going better.
After we had grabbed a quick bite of some subs, Harry had kept his word and we had loaded the London tube.
It put me in mind of New York because it had the same feel, and Harry was suddenly more talkative.
He was proud of his town, and seemed to enjoy showing it off.
I got some great shots, despite staying inside of a cab, and I even got a quick history lesson.
“Created by Augustus Pugin in 1855.” Harry informed me. “Its made with cast iron and brick.”
“Can you go inside?” I said taking in the large monument in excitement.
“Not unless you were born here. They don’t let outside citizens inside.”
I frowned. “Well that’s shady. We don’t do that with our American monuments. I didn’t know your people were so snobbish.”
My tone was light and Harry chuckled as well as the cab driver.
Americans…they both seemed to think
“Don’t worry about it. It’s not that wondrous. The 300 plus stairs are enough to turn you off.” Harry assured me.
I just smiled.

Now we were back at his house.
I set down the camera, and refocused on the task at hand.
Getting ready.
The reservations were around 7:30pm and it was quickly approaching that time.
For tonight, I had a strapless black dress picked out that showed off my bust pretty nicely, and that rested just above my knees.
With my black heels and planned emerald accessories, I was hoping to at least look a little sexy.
If not, at least I had accomplished that goal with what was under the dress.
It had all been Kelsey’s idea.
On my small shopping trip before I came, when I stopped in the lingerie boutique, I had picked up a black lace set with a garter.
The lace which highlighted all the right assets hadn’t been a small penny, but admiring myself in the mirror, I could see Kesley’s suggestion was a pretty damn good one. Perking up my breasts and rounding out my butt, I had to admit I looked pretty good- and Kelsey’s goal might just work.
“Wear it on your last night together.” she assured. “You’ll stay on his mind long after the trip.”
As I slipped it under my dress, I hoped the words she said was true.
After all, I could use a better ending to this day then the way it had started.
I headed to the bathroom, curling my hair first and then touched up my makeup. I kept it light and let my eyes just be the accent piece. As I finished up the three color combo on my lids, I heard my name called from downstairs.
It was coming from Harry who had kept his distance downstairs since we had gotten back.
“Becca?” Harry called, “Almost done? We have to get going.”
“Coming.” I called. I quickly finished up my eyes, doing quick swipes of mascara and checked my final appearance.
Well Becca, this is as good as its going to get.
My hair hadn’t curled the way I wanted, and I may have slightly overdid it with my blush, but I didn’t have time to fix it.
I grabbed my small clutch, and gathered my heels in my hand heading for the stairs.
When I rounded the corner, I saw Harry was standing at the base of the steps, but he wasn’t looking at me.
With his phone pressed to his ear, he was turned away from me and the banister.
“Yeah I don’t know.” he said to who he was talking too. “You know me. I don‘t worry about things like that.”
As he stood there, he didn’t hear me and I took the moment to take him in.
His hair was down, fanning his shoulders and his stance was broad and tall.
As his laugh coated the air, I tried to hold back my smile.
Fuck, could Tarzan be more sexy?
As I stood studying the back muscles and the growing hair-quite longer from when we met- he finally re-focused.
“Yeah, hold on man. Wait a second. She’s taking forever. BECCA-” he began to call loudly.
He turned around but paused when he saw me already standing at the top of the steps.
I peered down at him, and he peered up at me.
He was dressy-casual in a nice crisp cream shirt and his signature jeans. A black blazer hung on the banister by his tattooed hand.
Yet, his eyes had my attention now.
“I’m ready.” I said as they locked.
He didn’t say anything. Not to me, and not to the phone.
He just stared for a second. His eyes moved down me slowly taking in the details of my dress, and then back up to my eyes.
Unconsciously he bit his lip, and he remained speechless.
I gave a small smile.
I think he liked my outfit.
Really liked it.
As I began to come towards him, taking the steps, he seemed to remember his phone conversation.
“Ah…I’ll uh...um…let me call you back. She just came downstairs.” he said to whomever he was talking too.
His eyes didn’t leave my dress and as I stood before him, I kept my smile.
He looked really handsome too. I could barely keep my eyes off of him.
“Sorry I took so long…Do you like my dress?” I asked as he hung up the phone. His eyes scanned me up and down again, and he cleared his throat.
“Its um…”
His eyes moved until they landed on my chest.
I had to admit, the push up bra had the girls looking good today; nice and plump and his eyes burned a hole through the fabric.
“It’s fine.” he said moving back up to my eyes. “We’re going to be late.” he said, grabbing his suit jacket. “Do you have everything?”
I nodded yes, bending to put on my shoes.
As they dropped, I leaned down, placing them on one at a time.
His eyes didn’t leave me, or my chest.
“Do you have a jacket?” he asked when I stood back up.
“I was just going to rough it.” I said honestly, and he turned away from me.
Grabbing his jacket off the banister, he handed it to me.
“Here.” he said surprising me.
“Oh I don’t-”
“Take it.” he said. “I don’t really need it myself.”
“I’m not cold.”
“Still.” he said holding it out for me. “Please put it on.”
His eyes briefly met my breasts again.
I took it, but didn’t immediately put it on. I didn’t need it.

Harry locked up the house, and led me out to the car. He opened the door to his Range Rover, and helped me climb in.
Then he came over to the drivers side.
Climbing in the front seat, he briefly looked at me and my dress and then started the car.
He punched in the location in his phone and then plugged it into the speakers.
Pulling out of his carport, we headed out into the main road.
“You haven’t been here before?” I questioned as the navigation began to lead us and he shook his head no.
“Do you know what kind of food they have?” I asked curiously.
“It’s like an Italian Steakhouse.” he said keeping his eyes on the road in front of him.
It was dusk, and the sky above us was a warm hue of dark orange.
“Oh.” I said looking at the surroundings around me.
The radio played some Fleetwood Mac song, and outside of the general car noises, the ride was quiet.
As Harry drove, he kept his eyes on the road, and I kept my eyes on him.
The disappearing sun danced off his right side, and I studied the tight jawline that outlined his beautiful face.
He was quiet like he had been most of the day.
“Hey, what are you thinking about?” I asked gently.
He turned to me, and once more his eyes landed on the exposed skin that led to my chest.
Why did his eyes keep looking there?
“Nothing.” he said quietly.
I smiled.
“At all?”
His eyes raised back up to my own, before he turned from me again.
He tapped his fingers on the steering wheel. The metal from one of his rings, made a small clink sound.
“Well just one….“he said, keeping his eyes straight. “So uh…this dress… is this the one you wore in New York?” he asked.
I turned to him in confusion.
“When?”
We had only been there one day.
He didn’t look back at me yet.
“When you went out with your friends.”
I kept my confused expression.
“No. You saw that dress.”
“Well yeah,” he said gently. “I just didn’t know if you came back and changed.”
I peered down at myself.
This was not a dress for my friends. This was only for him.
“I wouldn’t have worn this.” I reassured. “I only brought this dress for you.”
“For me?” he asked, finally turning back to me.
I gave him a small smile and nodded yes.
“Why?” he asked curiously.
“I thought you would like it.”
And I think he did, which is why he kept looking at me.
Yet when I gave him a teasing smile, he didn’t reciprocate it. He just looked back at me seriously. Our eyes locked for a few seconds and he still gave no emotion.
His eyes read, why would you do that?

I didn’t have an answer.
Oh.
Maybe he hated it.
Maybe he thought it was too sexy.
I turned from the pierce of his stare in embarrassment.
Jeez, why had I even thought to wear this?
“Okay…guess not.” I said quietly.
I looked out of the opposite window away from him.
We were both silent again and he didn’t correct my statement.
It was official, he hated it.

The rest of the ride was silent.
When we made it to the restaurant, the valet opened my door and helped me out.
I gave him an appreciative smile and stood on the curb. As the valet smiled back at me, I took the opportunity to turn away from him and take in our destination.
Harry was right.
The row of cars lining the private valet lot told its own story of the occupants.
As Harry came out and tipped the valet, I took in the additional details of the space.
The place had perfect ‘mood lighting’ and seemed pretty romantic.
It must have been a common place for proposals.
As my eyes met the valet’s once more, I caught his appreciative glance at my dress.
He gave me a welcoming smile and I think I even saw a small wink.
At least someone liked it.
I smiled back at him definitely soaking up the attention as I suddenly felt Harry’s hand on my back.
“Shall we?” he asked cutting his eyes at the valet.
I turned to him, only seeing him once again.
I nodded yes and walked ahead of him.
From the moment we walked in, we were treated like royalty.
Harry’s reservation- though under a pseudo name-must have been a big deal, because the manager was waiting to greet us as we entered.
“I have your private table already all set. And you’ll have total privacy.” the Manager assured, looking me over.
“Thanks.” Harry said with only his second smile of the evening. “I appreciate that.”
We walked through the dimly lit place into a private area of the restaurant away from the other patrons and the manager was correct. Taking us to a small closed off room, we had complete privacy.
We also had extreme awkwardness.
Red rose petals lined the table and candles sat around us. Small jazz played from somewhere in the distance and the air was instantly tense.
I looked at Harry quickly. Did he know it would be like this?
Avoiding my eyes, he pulled my seat out and I took a seat down.
The manager asked something about drinks, but I was just looking around.
This was definitely not the right setting for what we currently had going on.
We were barely speaking.
Though I still couldn’t figure out why.
We weren’t mad at each other and things had been good for a while.
I didn’t know what was stressing Harry out, but hopefully he would get over it soon.
“I’m not sure what we want yet. Can you come back?” Harry asked in regards to the drinks.
The manager nodded yes and then left us alone.
Harry sat across from me and the weirdness crept in even more.
We both looked at each other as the room around us, coated us.
This was a room for smiles, whispered words of love, and possible lifetime commitments.
Not silence, shifted eyes and cold drafts.
Not for me or Harry.

Still I tried to immediately lighten the mood.
“Well this is nice.” I said breaking the ice.
Harry continued to look back at me, lost in his own thoughts and then surprisingly agreed.
“Yeah.” he said quietly. “I didn’t know they did all this.”
He gestured to the room.
“I knew they tried to set the mood but…” he scanned the table. “You think they used enough roses?” he joked dryly.
I didn’t respond.
I thought it was kind of nice.
It was a sweet gesture and though it was lost between us, I could at least appreciate what the manager and staff had tried to do.
Harry looked at me.
“Are you uncomfortable?”
“I’m fine. Are you?” I asked, since his whole demeanor screamed something different.
He shrugged. “I’m fine, I guess.” he said gently. “I’ll adjust.“ he said with a slow sigh. “I just hope the food is good.”
“Should be.” I said. After all, the five star accommodations had to be a precursor to everything.
I looked around the room again.
Harry looked at his hands.
Silence…
Dead silence.
I folded my hands.
He ran his through his hair.
“Should we look at the menu?” I asked.
“Sure.” he said softly, almost grateful for my suggestion.
We both picked up the menus and scanned.
“We should probably decide on a drink, before the waiter comes back.” Harry said.
“I’ll get wine.” I said without thought. I think I needed it to get through this uncomfortable night.
“Yeah? Me too.” Harry said just as quickly.
“What kind are you getting?” I asked attempting small talk.
He shrugged.
I scanned the options and settled on a white wine. He settled on red.
Then we both looked back at the menus, trying to decide on dinner.
Midway through, as always, Harry’s phone chimed.
Glancing at it, he quickly swiped and answered the message.
The clicking tone of the Iphone and his quick fingers was slightly distracting.
He cleared his throat when he finished up the message and then looked at me.
“Business?” I guessed, already having my eyes on him.
He shook his head no. “Xander. Telling me his flight info.”
“Xander? The guy you’re meeting in California?”
He nodded yes. “We’ve been friends for a while.”
I shifted in my seat.
“And he was in New York too right? A few weeks ago?”
Harry nodded yes again.
I was instantly weary.
I didn’t know the guy, but he was apart of our first fight.
He was the guy Harry was adamant that was interested in Sara.
A part of me still felt that was bullshit, though I had gotten over the idea of Harry sleeping with her.
As I settled back and thought about it, it didn’t make sense.
Harry wasn’t that stupid and public with his actions.
Still, the thought of the two of them hanging out, was unsettling to me.
I quickly read between the lines.
“So I’ll guess you’ll be out partying again and stuff huh?” I asked.
He looked up at me with an unreadable expression. It wasn’t curiosity, but it wasn’t amusement either.
He didn’t answer my exact my question, but he did respond.
“What about you?” he asked.
“What about me?”
“Well when you’re in Mexico. I’m sure you’re going to have a good time as well.”
I chuckled. “Yeah, and my dad two feet away.”
He smiled.
“Yeah…but I hope you have fun though.” he said gently. “Meet some nice people.”
I looked back at him.
What did that mean?
“And no,” he added. “No partying. I have that thing on the fourth, but other than that, I’m going to just take it easy the next few days. Probably catch up on sleep and stuff before the shows start.”
“Hmm.” was all I said. “Good.”
The manager came back, bringing our drinks and we placed our food orders.
After that, Harry attempted his own small talk. He started to talk about the last show, and some of the experiences. He was enthusiastic as he talked about the backstage meet and greet, fan signs, and silly on-stage interactions but I was just…distracted. My mind was focused on the day and how things seemed different.
It was the strangest thing.
With others, he was fine. With me, he was withdrawn. Sure we were talking and he finally seemed to want to have an actual conversation, but it wasn’t like normal.
Something was missing and it was starting to dawn on me that maybe it was more than exhaustion.
Maybe it was us.
Maybe I was missing something that had happened between us. I just didn’t know what.
I didn’t know what I had done.
With friends and phone calls, he was laughing and talking.
With fans, he was smiley and warm.
With me, he was serious and looking for ways to connect to me- but only so much. He wouldn’t get too close, as if on purpose.
He hadn’t touched me, kissed me or even held me in nine days.
He barely had been at the house, and as I even thought about it now, he had barely talked to me too.
His texts that I had initially figured were warm and caring, were starting to be realized as distractions.
The quick one-two sentence dialogues throughout the nine days were not tender, it was just basic communication. Quick ways of reaching out so he could (maybe) say he had.
I looked back at him now.
What had I done?
Was he repulsed by my period?
Had I turned him off in some way?
Had the great sex goddess been humanized and the spell over?
I was starting to think so…

As Harry finished up his story about the crew joking backstage, I nibbled on some of the provided breadsticks. They felt dry and spongy in my mouth.
“Sounds like fun.” I noted wryly, barely listening.
At this point, I couldn’t tell you if he was talking about Jim, Johhny or Sally, Santa Clause or Kermit the Frog.
My thoughts were everywhere but in this room.
“Yeah.” Harry said quietly. He spun his wine glass catching on that he was talking to himself.
I nibbled some more bread.
He sipped more wine.
He looked at me and I looked at him.
I had nothing to say, and I wasn’t going to pretend with him.
So we were quiet once more.
He sighed.
I sighed.
He picked up his phone and I did the same.
I started browsing my Facebook, while he returned messages.
Then something inside of him seemed to snap.
He looked up at me suddenly, sighing loudly.
“This is weird isn’t it?”
“What?” I asked lifting my eyes.
“This.” he said and gestured between us. “We should go.”
I just looked back at him.
“Do you want to go?” I ask.
He bit into his bottom lip.
“Yes.” he said without hesitation.
I instantly frowned at his quick answer.
“I mean, noooooo?” he questioned slowly, reading my expression and I grew confused.
Did he want to be there with me or not?
“I don’t know Bec.” he said a second later, “I don’t want to be like this. Struggling for conversation. You‘re obviously uncomfortable here with me,“ he said softly. “So let‘s just go.”
“I’m not uncomfortable. You are Harry.” I instantly argued.
He looked back at me.
“I’m fine.” he said instantly.
“No you’re not.” I said quickly. “You haven’t been all day.”
He leaned back in his seat. He folded his hands against his stomach.
“I told you, I’m tired.”
“Sure. Tired.” I said, leaning back myself. “Thing is, I’ve known you for the last couple of months and I’ve seen you tired, that’s not what this is.”
His eyes narrowed.
“Well then I have a lot on my mind.” he argued defensive.
“Obviously.” I mumbled with a small eye roll, taking another sip of my drink.
He pierced his eyes at me.
I could tell he didn’t like the sarcasm in my tone.
“So do you want to leave or not?” he bit back.
“Sure.” I said impatiently and stood up.
The day had been shitty, why not the night too?
I quickly grabbed his blazer jacket off the back of my chair and crossed my arms.
What the hell was his problem?
His eyes trailed up me from his seated position, taking me in.
“What’s that stance suppose to mean? You’re pissed now?” he asked sarcastically.
I rolled my eyes obnoxiously.
“Becca you don’t have a clue the amount of stress I’m under and half the shit I deal with. Please drop whatever attitude you have.”
“Attitude?” I questioned and he stood. “You‘re the one acting like a jerk.”
“A jerk?” he asked, taken aback. “I haven’t said one rude thing to you.”
“You don’t have too.” I argued. “Your actions have said enough for you.”
He sighed loudly and dug in his back pocket.
“Whatever.” he muttered.
We hadn’t even eaten yet.
He peeled off two hundred dollar bills and threw them on the table, then his cold eyes met mine.
“Let’s go then. After you.” he said again, but this time, his tone wasn’t warm like before. It was filled with spite.
“What is wrong with you?” I couldn’t help asking.
Who the fuck was this?
“What is wrong with you?” he asked back.
Who the fuck are you? was the real message in his words.
His cold green eyes met the storm of my hazel ones.
I didn’t answer, trying to storm past him. I just wanted to leave.
He grabbed my arm quickly, pulling me back.
“Don’t do that.” he scolded. “Don’t make a scene. That’s all we need. We‘ll be on every UK newspaper by the morning.”
“Don’t touch me then.” I said.
“Don’t tell me not to touch you.” he argued with dismayed possession. “I’m the main one who gets too.”
I chuckled, and pulled away from him.
“Oh really? That’s why you haven’t been able to keep your hands off of me recently right?”
My voice was once again filled with sarcasm and he took on the role of the female.
Rolling his eyes dramatically, he sighed.
I kept going.
“That’s why we had such great conversation lately, because you just love being around me right now.”
“Becca don‘t start-” he warned.
“No.“ I said moving completely away from him. “Look, I don’t know who irritated you recently, but it’s not fair to me the way you’ve been treating me. I haven’t done anything to you and yet, I’m the bulk of the one getting your pissy attitude.” I said.
“You’re doing something right now.” He mumbled, then he sighed finally losing patience. “Becca you’re pissed about something you don’t have a clue about. You don’t know the shit in my head right now.”
“Then tell me. Tell me what I’ve done. Why have you been so mad at me these last few days?”
His eyes narrowed once more in confusion.
“These last few days…?” he trailed. “Becca I haven’t even seen you…and…you specifically haven’t done anything. I’m not mad at you.” he said gently.
“Seems like it.”
He sighed, and ran a hand through his hair.
“I’m not mad at you.” he reiterated again. “I just…I can’t tell you. I can‘t talk to you about it.”
I rolled my eyes again and turned from him, ready to walk away once more.
“Becca please. Believe me. It’s not you. It’s me. I’m trying really hard not to hurt you here.”
“Hurt me? What does that have to do with anything?”
“It’s the situation.”
“What fucking situation?” I said exasperated. “Why can’t you just talk to me? Don‘t you trust me?”
He sighed again, and looked at his feet.
“It’s not about trust.” he said to his toes. “You know how I feel about you and you know I trust you.” he brought his eyes back up to mine.
I didn’t say another word.
That wasn’t good enough for me, but I didn’t try to leave this time.
Sensing I was still waiting on a further explanation, he backed up and stood back by the table, by my previous seat.
“Sit down.” he commanded gently.
“Excuse me?”
“Please.” he said. “Just sit down. Lets finish dinner, and then we can talk when we get home.”
“Talk about what?” I asked.
“Things.” he said simply.
I rolled my eyes once more.
“Can you stop being cryptic? What does that even mean?”
He didn’t respond, and instead pulled my chair out for me.
“Please Bec.” he repeated. “Let’s just have a nice last night.”
I turned away from him.
No, screw that.
“The food will be here soon.” he continued. “So…Let’s just sit, eat a little bit, and then after, if you want to throw it in my face, you’re more than welcome.”
I turned back to him and finally cracked a small smile. I was picturing it and at this rate, maybe I would.
Yet when he smiled back at me a second later, I softened.
“Please?” he added. His subtle charm already worked on me and the old Harry I was use too, was finally showing a flirty glimpse.
Relenting, I moved back by the chair and sat down.
He took the blazer from my hands and placed it back behind me.
Then he sat down as well, and scooped the bills back off the table.

The food came five minutes later.

As we ate our food, we didn’t suddenly make up, but we didn’t argue either.
Both of our personalities were strong when tested, and it was amazing to me, how quickly the ‘argument’ had escalated and then de-escalated.
He didn’t say sorry, and neither did I, but the rest of dinner was cordial, however, something about keeping the food in our mouths could have had something to do with that.
When we finally headed back to the house, the silence between us was comfortable.
“So the food was good.” Harry said.
“Yeah. Thanks for taking me.” I said politely on the ride back.
“You’re welcome.” he said softly.
“Thanks for coming…to London.”
“Thanks for inviting me.”
We shared a small smile and he focused the rest of the way on getting us home safely.

When we got back to the house, we both headed upstairs to change.
Harry went to his closet, while I dug through my suitcase.
While on the search for my packed toiletries, I felt the thick padding of the inside side compartment. Unzipping it, I came face to face with a grey plastic bag.
Then it hit me.
His gift.
Harry’s graphic tee I had purchased from the Metropolis store in New York.
I had completely forgotten about it, and had yet to give it to him.
I picked it up and stood. I turned to him.
He was still huddled near his closet, bent over, tossing his shoes inside.
“Hey Harry?” I called out.
He turned to me slowly.
“I um-’ I opened the bag, and moved towards him. “I forgot to give this to you.”
His eyes trailed down to the bag in my hands.
“It’s something I got for you in New York, I thought you might like it.”
His eyes looked back up at me as I handed him the bag.
Taking it in his hands, he pulled out the folded AC/DC shirt and cupped the plastic bag between his arm and armpit.
“I didn’t know what size to get you, but hopefully it fits….and hopefully you like it.”
As Harry’s eyes scanned the t-shirt in front of me, I could tell he was briefly taken aback.
“You bought this for me?” he asked for clarification.
“Yeah. When I left the hotel, that’s where I headed. I was looking for your Rolling Stone one, with all the colors.”
He looked back down at the shirt.
His face slowly curled in a smile, but he wiped it away, gathering his tongue between his teeth.
“You didn’t have to get me anything.”
“I know.” I said. “But I wanted too.”
He studied the shirt, and cluthed it to his chest.
“Well thanks,” he said looking at me. “I love it.”
“Yeah?” I asked unsure. “Because I can take it back if you don’t.”
He smirked.
“Stop it.” He lifted the shirt again. “No I really do. I would have bought this for myself.”
That got my own smile out of me.
“Well good.” I said, taking a step backward. “Glad you do.”
He didn’t say anything more as I turned away from him, anxious to get out of my dress.
I huddled back by my suitcase and gathered my things.
It was hardly ten o’ clock, but I just wanted to bury myself in bed.
I just wanted to forget this weird day, and just start all over again tomorrow.
It dawned on me that tomorrow I would be on a plane, but maybe that was best.
Maybe the month in each other’s presence had finally caught up to us.
I had tried to warn him.
I knew he would be sick of me.

I felt his eyes on me as I gathered my things and headed to the bathroom a couple seconds later.
Shutting the door behind me, I placed all the items on the bathroom stool.
Then I observed myself.
My makeup was still flawlessly in place. It seemed with no intimate kisses to smear, it had remained intact.
I took in my dress a final time.
The short black dress that had appeared to be the stuff of man’s dreams had obviously done nothing for Harry.
I debated taking it back or tossing it in the trash where it belonged.
Well don’t be that stupid Becca.
The dress had been well over a hundred dollars.
I sighed.
Maybe in the future another lover would appreciate it instead.
But I didn’t want to think about another lover. I was still foolishly hooked on the one I had.
Giving myself a final look-over, I began to disrobe my jewelry.
I removed my bracelet first, then I removed the green emerald necklace Harry had purchased for me.
I never removed it, and studied it as I laid in it on the counter.
Even with the place we were at now, I would always treasure that necklace.
It was the only proof I had that for a moment I was important to him.
For a moment, I had been important enough for him to go out of his way for me.

As I unclasped the small studs in my ear next, I heard a noise.
Turning to my left, I saw Harry suddenly.
He had opened the door and he was there, leaned against the doorframe.
His eyes were on me and intense.
So intense, it was enough to make me turn away.
I gave him a small smile and turned back to the mirror.
I’m guessing he had to pee or something.
As I looked down to get back to my task and re-locate, his pronounced accent moved through the room.
“I’m sorry.” he said breaking the silence.
I looked up at him slowly.
“For what?” I asked.
“Tonight and the last few days.” he said gently. “I know I haven’t really been here. I’ve had a lot on my mind, and you were right, it’s not fair the way I’ve treated you.”
I dropped my hands, over the dramatics of dinner.
“It’s okay.” I said gently. “I get it. You’re right-”
He continued to look at me and then slowly lifted off the doorframe.
“I don’t really know your job and your stresses. Your life is much more complicated than I could ever imagine, and I was being selfish. I’m sorry.” I said honestly.
He took a step towards me.
“I’m not stressed.” he said suddenly. “At least not that much.”
I instantly was confused. Hadn’t that been what he said in the restaurant? Hadn’t that been the reason for his withdrawal?
“What do you mean?” I began thinking I had misheard, but he ignored me.
His eyes scanned my dress again.
“You look beautiful tonight.” he said.
I couldn’t help it, I instantly smiled. Those words had been all I wanted to hear all night.
“Thanks.” I said, though I was still slightly skeptical by now.
“I mean it.” he said fully coming over to me. “I should have said it earlier, a couple times even, but…you are just stunning. Really. And everyone could see it. I literally wanted to punch that valet for the way he was eye-fucking you.”
His eyes hadn’t wavered away from me, and I was the one to break the gaze, blushing.
“Thanks Harry.” I said quietly.
I turned to the mirror.
I pulled the studs from my ear, and still felt Harry’s eyes on me.
As his green irises burned a hole through my back, I nervously dropped one of the studs on the floor.
Bending to pick it back up, he closed the space even more.
I reached for a headband.
I tilted my hair back, ready to pull my hair up, when a single finger trailed my back.
It was Harry’s hand, and it instantly sent a shiver.
I paused what I was doing as he came up behind me, pressing against me.
Our eyes locked in the mirror.
“I’m sad you’re leaving tomorrow.” he said.
“Are you?” I asked.
I really couldn’t tell.
Verbally he had been saying it for the last couple of weeks, but lately, he just seemed indifferent to it all.
I was sure in his mind, he had already calculated that he would see me in San Diego so it wasn’t a huge deal.
“Yeah.” he said quietly.
His eyes broke away from me and he turned away.
As he did, I used the distraction and turned my body to him.
He was still in his outfit from earlier, and he looked handsome as well.
Sensing a quick withdrawal, I turned to him and re-forced the contact. I wasn’t ready for whatever this was, to end just yet. This had been the Harry I had been waiting on.
I was finally getting somewhere with him.
“Well I’ll miss you.” I said. “If that helps.”
He looked back up at me, and smirked. A little small half smile, that appeared for about a second, before it faded.
“It does. I’ll miss you too.” he said softly.
“Well when I’m in Mexico I’ll make sure to get you a souvenir or something.”
“A souvenir huh?” he asked.
I nodded yes. “I’ll be with my family, but yes, I’ll make sure I visit some tourist shop or something. Maybe get you a shot glass, or one of those-”
He cut me off mid sentence when he brought a finger to my lips. He silenced me and then trailed his finger down.
He traced my bottom lip with his finger.
Circling my mouth with his hand, he stared back at me.
“Stop talking about Mexico.” he said gently.
“Why?” I asked, and he silenced me again. This time with his kiss.
Immediately he enveloped me.
His aftershave was fresh on my nose, and his lips were gentle against mine.
He started his kiss slow, pecking gently as if it was the first time he kissed me.
Then, his mouth opened a bit, swallowing and sucking on both lips at the same time. I deepened it, bringing a hand to his shoulder and the rest to his hair.
His arms wrapped around me, and as tongues inserted, my body hit the bathroom counter.
I felt amazing, and it also felt complete.
This was what I had been craving.
Now that we were here, I was reminded once more how there had been no contact for nine days.
My body responded quickly trying to kiss him hungrily, but Harry slowed me down.
He broke the kiss and pressed his forehead to mine.
“Don’t.” he said gently. “Not like that.”
I didn’t know what he meant, until his mouth connected to mine again.
His kiss remained gentle and passionate, savoring, and his hand moved up to my face, cupping it.
My hands dropped moving to his waist and he pressed himself up against me.
I could already feel the stiffness enclosed in his tight pants.
He moaned against my mouth and again my body quickly responded. Moving down, my fingers went to his belt and Harry immediately took my hands off of him.
I broke the kiss instantly ready to protest, when he spun me the opposite way.
With my back now to him, my eyes went to the mirror and watched as he bent and kissed my neck and exposed shoulders.
“I love your skin.” he whispered against me. “It’s so soft.”
He placed a gentle kiss.
I pushed my ass against him, still feeling the hardness, but it did nothing for him.
His hands moved around, gripping my breasts and his mouth continued their soft trail on my neck.
I moaned gently, since he was near one of my pleasured spots and his eyes met mine in the mirror.
A look of adoration and lust met me and it made me want him more.
I broke the contact and turned back around, crashing my lips against his.
Forget this slow shit.
He was taken aback for a second, and stumbled back a bit as I devoured him with my mouth.
His hands found my head again, resting in my hair and my hands went for his belt once more.
He broke the kiss.
“Stop.” he whispered.
“Why?” I asked.
“I don’t want it to be so fast tonight.”
“It’s been nine days.” I argued.
He grinned.
“You’ve counted?”
I nodded yes. “I’ve missed you.”
Every part of you.
His hands found mine and he played with the tips of my fingers. His green eyes stayed on me, as his next sentence melted me.
“I’m here hun. Always have been.”
“I don’t think that’s entirely true.” I argued softly.
He just smiled my favorite Harry smile.
He nodded his head towards the main bedroom.
“Why don’t you go lay down?”
“Are you going to join me?” I asked skeptically.
He smirked lazily.
“Course.” he said.
I smiled and backed away from him.
Finally.
Going for the zipper on the side of my dress, I began to pull it down when Harry stopped me.
“Don’t.” he said. “Just go lay down.”
“Fully clothed?” I asked.
“Yes Becca.” he said with a patient sigh. “I still want to take everything off of you, and I’m going too, just give me a second. I need to run downstairs.”
I didn’t respond and did as he said.
As I took my position on the bed, Harry bypassed me, heading for the door.
“Where are you going? What do you have to do?”
He just smiled again.
“Patience Becca.” he said and left the room.
I sighed in exasperation…and sexual frustration.
My body was on fire, and he had never made me wait this long.
Normally by now, we would have already been going at it.
My mouth on him, his on mine and moans being murmured.
What was with his delay?
I looked around the room, trying to distract myself when he appeared about a minute later.
When he did, candles were in his hands and he was also holding a long lighter.
I watched him in interest as he positioned them around the room and began to light them.
Harry already kept candles in his room, and soon the room was lit up and romantic.
“Trying to set a mood?” I teased.
“Shut up.” he said with a small blush and reached and hit the light.
“Don’t distract me. We don’t want this to be sacrificial.”
I lightly giggled.
Soon, the only light came from the candles and our reflections on the wall.
I sat up ready to get started, but he didn’t come to me yet.
“One more thing.” he said more to himself.
“What is it?”
“Patience.” he reiterated with a coy smile before leaving the room again.
This time when he came back, it was with a pair of small speakers.
Connecting his phone to his device, music suddenly entered the room.
“Hmm. Nice touch.”
“I think so.” he said came over to me.
I instantly sat up ready to pull his shirt off.
“No lay back.” he said as he gathered on his knees.
I pouted but did as he said.
And then there was nothing.
I laid across the bed, and he didn’t move.
He just stared at me.
His green eyes stayed on mine.
“What are we doing?” I asked quietly.
Was this some new pre-fourplay game?
“Nothing. I just finally get it.”
“Get what?” I asked.
He didn’t respond, and finally moved towards me.
“Nothing,” he said. “I’m here.”
He gently kissed my lips again and grabbed my hands.
He lifted my arms above my head.
Keeping me clasped, he brought his face to mine.
“Ever been in handcuffs?” he asked.
I smiled and shook my head no.
“Hmmm.” he said mysteriously.
“Scoot up.” he said suddenly.
Once more I did as he said when he let me go.
As my back hit the pillows, he leaned over me and dug in his nightstand.
He moved some stuff around, and then produced shiny silver handcuffs.
I instantly giggled.
“Have those always been in there?”
He smirked.
“They have.”
“Wow.” I said in amusement. “I didn’t know you had that in you.”
He chuckled.
“I only bring it out on special occasions.”
And then he twirled them.
“Will you let me?”
I spread my arms over my head, allowing my position to answer for me.
He smiled, and took position over me.
Clasping the handcuffs to the headboard of the bed, I surrendered full control to him.
He smiled after he got them on and I about died.
The dimples tried to kill me.
“Now we’ll take this off.” he said, moving for the zipper of my dress.
He teased me, pulling down the zipper as slow as possible.
When it was done, he shimmed my dress down, exposing my strapless black lace bra and lace panties held up by a garter.
“Oh my God.” he said instantly. “You’ve had this on all night?”
As his eyes moved over me hungrily, I smiled.
“Yeah. You like?”
“I like?“ he questioned. “I love it. I fucking worship it. Why would you do this to me?”
I smiled.
“Well I saved it all month for today.”
He smiled. “I’m kind of mad you did.”
He threw my dress across the room.
“But I hope you know, this needs to make a re-appearance again soon. Tonight I can’t wait… but I want a night to fuck you in this. Real soon.” he emphasized.
I immediately smiled wider for two reasons.
One, because he liked the outfit and two, because he just confirmed I would not only be seeing him again, but that I would be in his bed again.
He lifted his shirt over his head.
Immediately his tattoos looked back at me, and I was a little upset I had these handcuffs on.
His skin was begging to be touched.
He moved back up me, and kissed me.
Losing the gentleness of the bathroom kisses, his mouth sucked and probed until it began to make its way down.
He moved from my neck, to my shoulders, to my chest, to the curve of my breasts.
He moved down…
Down…
Past my belly button…
Past my hip…
Past my most sensitive area and then my inner thighs.
Keeping his lips on me, he kissed every part of my leg until he reached my left foot.
Then he shifted, kissing my right foot and working his way back up my neck.
His hands went for my underwear, unclasping the belt and he pulled them off.
Then he went for my bra until I was completely nude underneath him.
Now my body really was on fire.
He came back up to my lips, placing a hungry kiss, then moved down again.
This time his mouth connected to my nipple and he began to suck gently.
I moaned as his hands moved down and began to rub my clit.
I gave a pleasured sigh and squirmed a bit as his mouth moved over the top while his hand moved over the bottom.
“Harry…”I muttered and he grinned against my skin.
He continued sucking, and soon small little bruises peppered my skin. Perfect little pink love bites showcasing a small possession.
As he noted his new Harry signatures trailing on my chest, his hands moved away from my clit and switched positions.
Suddenly his mouth was between my legs, and his hands were squeezing my breasts as his mouth worked.
“Fuck.” I sighed, completely lost and completely his.
He moved his tongue in and out and around and around; melting my core.
My hips moved and buckled, but I wasn’t going anywhere with the handcuffs.
“Does it feel good?” he asked still between my legs. “Do you like my tongue on you?”
“Yes!” I practically screamed and he smiled.
He kept working until he brought me to my first orgasm.
And then as I lay slightly comatose, he climbed off the bed.
Unbuttoning his pants, he pulled them down quickly and went over to his dresser.
Grabbing a small silver key, he undid the handcuffs and I immediately went for him.
He laughed as I pounced on him and began to pepper him with my own kisses.
I was just about to make my way down to his still covered cock when he stopped me.
Flipping us, he climbed back on top of me, and pulled his own boxers down.
His mouth all over me again.
As he started sucking my neck, I tried to push him off of me, so I could return the oral favor, but he was adamant.
“Stop. It’s about you tonight.” he said gently.
My hands went to his hair, and he peered back at me.
In the flicked light, his eyes were the most beautiful green, and I realized how crazy I was about him.
How lost I was over him.
I didn’t want to ever look away.
He leaned down, kissing me and I felt him at the tip of my entrance. My body craved to be connected to his.
“Baby you’re so beautiful.” he whispered, moving his kisses by my ear. “The most beautiful girl in the world,” he said gently in my ear. “And so fucking sexy.” he said with a small bite of my ear.
I didn’t respond and just smiled.
If it was bullshit, I didn’t even care. I knew years from now, I would play those words on a loop in my private time.

About a minute later after more kisses, he finally pushed into me and both of our mouths fell open against each other at the wanted contact. The feeling was already amazing as he moved in; inch by inch, and he hadn’t even begun thrusting yet.
As he opened me up, my body reveled with my favorite feeling.
This is where he belonged and he fit me perfectly.
The feeling of being filled only uniquely his.
That little tiny hole of my womanhood had never felt as whole as when he was inside of me.
Closing my eyes at the sensation, he pulled back slowly and then pushed forward again.
I moaned and wrapped my arms around his arms, desperately ready for the ride.
He thrusted in.
Out.
In.
Out.
And I could do was sigh in pleasure.
“Open your eyes.” he said softly. “I want to see you.”
I did as he said, and his eyes were intense before me. They were dilated, but the tiny flicker of green was highlighted from the candles in the room.
Those eyes could be the death of me. They could nourish all the crops, end all wars, and make Becca Johnson lose her complete fucking mind.
In that moment, any wish was his command.
He pulled back again slowly making sure I felt every inch and then pushed forward again.
I moaned again, lost of real words.
His thrusts were mastered, slow, but deep.
I opened my legs wider and his mouth met mine again.
“You feel so incredible.” he whispered. “So amazing…So perfect…”
So did he.
He pulled back slow again and thrust once more.
The feeling was amazing. I closed my eyes again.
His mouth moved to my neck.
“Open them baby. Let me see the way I make you feel.”
“It feels good.” I moaned, so he was well aware because I couldn‘t open my eyes. It just felt too wonderful.
“Yeah?” he pulled back suddenly almost completely pulling out, then he slammed into me. “Tell me.”
“Fuck!” I grunted.
“Tell me.” he demanded again. “Tell me how good it feels.”
“It feels sooo good.“ I moaned again.
“Whose is it?” he whispered in my ear.
“It’s…It’s yours. All yours.” I muttered incoherently.
“Yeah? Say it. Say Harry’s its yours.” he demanded.
His hips were still moving, and pushing deeper and deeper in me. My words and thoughts were gibberish.
“Its yours. Baby all yours.” I muttered.
And then it began.
His hips quickly sped up pace and for a few seconds he fucked me, pushing my hips into the mattress at rapid pace. The sound of our skin slapping, loud.
I grunted, he groaned.
I moaned, he sighed.
Behind us, his bed frame hit the wall loudly.
My legs wrapped around his waist as he brought us both to incredible heights, making me understand the term ‘fucking the shit out of me‘.
“You…feel…so…fucking…good…” he grunted. “Always so…fucking…wet.”
My fingers raked down his back as I felt his muscles contracting and expanding as he moved on top of me.
He continued to place quick kisses on my skin, as he hit deep spots that made my body shutter.
The pleasure so intense, I was at a loss of words and when his dirty talk kicked in, forget it.
“God this pussy…” he mumbled. “I love your body so fucking much. I could just fuck you everyday and never get tired.”
His mouth met mine, and he bit my lip.
My second orgasm rose quickly and just as I was about to let go, he stopped.
I figured it was a cramp or something that made him cease all movement.
“What’s wrong?” I asked in slight alarm, opening my eyes and he just smiled down at me.
“Stop closing your eyes.” he demanded playfully.
“I can’t help it.” I argued, smiling back.
He laughed, adjusting himself in me and we shared a quick kiss.
My hands went to his head, pulling him down to me and our mouths began to tangle again.
When we pulled away, his mind was back on the main event.
“Just look at me.” he said and I did. “Just watch us together.”
As he pushed forward and began again, this time it was slow.
Painstakingly slow, but the tempo had changed.
This time he didn’t want to fuck me.
Placing one hand behind my head, and wrapping the other around my body, he lifted me slightly so he had complete control of my body.
His green eyes stayed dead locked on mine.
And I saw it.
I saw why he wanted me to look at him.
He was no longer having regular sex with me.
This time, he was making love to me.
Slow.
In.
Out.
In.
Out.
Deep.
Deeper.
I swallowed under the pierce of his stare, and moved my eyes to watch.
As his hips continued to move back and forth in me, I studied the perfect symmetry we made together.
His small hips inked with the ferns created a perfect pathway that seemed to lead straight to me.
This was us and it was beautiful and I could see why he wanted me to see it.
Sex was overhyped a lot and the act itself could be exaggerated, but watching him move in between my legs…nothing honestly compared. He gave me the best sex of my life and I finally saw how people could become addicted to this feeling.
In that moment, he could have stayed inside of me forever.
Yet, maybe he already was.
As I brought my eyes back up to his face, he was still watching me.
Giving me a small half smile, he leaned and gave me another gentle kiss.
His lips encased mine leisurely and this time we both had to close our eyes until we broke apart.
When we did, and his eyes locked on mine I was blessed and cursed in that moment.
I ‘ll try to find the words to describe the way he suddenly looked at me, but just know that everything in that moment changed.
As he finally came about a minute later, collapsing in the crook of my neck, I was stilled, still trapped in that look.
Just pure adoration.
Just pure love.
But it wasn’t, because he wasn’t in love with me.
Yet in that moment, it felt like it.
It felt like I was the love of his life, the mother of his children, and the only person he would be with the rest of his life.
It felt like I was the one he wanted to be with forever.
A wave moved through me, along with a sudden realization.
Holy shit, please pray for the woman who would one day get the real look.

He didn’t move off of me immediately, peering down at me after his explosive orgasm. His eyes searched mine, flicking gently back and forth as if he was trying to read something off of me.
I was suddenly scared of what he could see.
It had to be all there.
I turned away from him and his hands caressed my face in concern, but not for the same reason.
“Did you finish?” he asked gently. “The second time?”
“Yeah.” I said quietly. And then some.

He smiled slowly, his dimples curling into perfection on his face.
“Good.” he said and kissed my nose. “I think that’s been the best so far.” he said proudly.
“I’ve never come like that.”
I couldn’t even celebrate that statement and the fact that I, Becca Johnson had caused it.
No, I was still stuck back in a world of a few moments earlier.
The way he made love to me.
For the first time.
He rolled off of me and sighed in content.
The candles had the room smelling of Cinnamon, and around me, my body tingled, but I didn’t move.
There was no condom to discard but I could see Harry out of the corner of my eye, grabbing himself, maybe slowing the ‘aftershocks’. He gently squeezed his penis and I turned away, sitting up.
I needed a moment.
“Where are you going?” he asked beside me.
“Bathroom. Think I’ve got to pee now.” I lied.
He had felt dangerously close to my bladder so it was believable.
He grinned again, catching on to my subtle hint. “Sorry.”
I didn’t respond and stood, this time choosing not to cover myself with a sheet.
I already felt completely naked and exposed anyway outside of my birthday suit.
I was sure now he knew me.
Well, for his eyes only I guessed.
I moved to the bathroom and shut the door behind me.
My legs felt wobbly and my skin felt flush but I couldn’t tell if it was because of the sex, or because the way I suddenly felt.
My thoughts were spinning.
Sitting on the toilet, I quickly used the facilities because lets face it, urinary tract infections were the devil and great sex seemed to love to bring them.
After, my legs still felt light as I lifted and made my way to the sink.
I washed my hands and then continued to run the water in the room, quickly splashing some on my face and peering at myself.
My curls were loose, finally falling from my festivities, and my makeup was a bit smeared.
Looking at my skin, I finally got a clear look at the small trail of pink little bruises, evidence of Harry’s love.
I chuckled to myself as it dawned on me that my parents were going to see this.
In a matter of days I would be in a bikini and unless I stayed in body makeup and no water, these babies were going to be exposed to the world.
My parents were going to kill me.
Jeez, I looked like such a slut.
Still, it felt nice.
It felt possessive, like he was marking me.
Though I already was marked.
All I was missing was big black letters across my forehead with the words HARRY on top of it.
It would have matched quite nicely with the lettering on my heart.
Looking in the mirror, tears stung my eyes as the heaviness of everything hit me.
Fuck.
Fuck.
FUCK.
I splashed some more water on my face, and tried to wash away the tears that were suddenly mixing.
Why had I allowed this to happen?
Why hadn’t I just left well enough alone?
Now I was here.
Now I had broke my own rule.

Kelsey’s voice played in my ear.
Don’t come back changed.
Don’t come back pregnant.
Don’t fall in love.
Well one rule was definitely broken.
That last one.

I was.
I was in love with him.
I knew it now.
I had been for a while.
And it was so damn stupid of me.

A knock on the door, made me jump.
“Yeah?” I called quickly.
“You alright?” Harry asked from behind the door.
“Yeah.” I said “I’m fine.”
“Kay.” he said. “I’m going to go downstairs and get some fruit. How does whip cream and strawberries sound to you?”
I could hear the humor in his tone and it made me have a small smile. I could already picture what he was planning.
“Sounds great.” I said. “Though I already look like a strawberry.”
Harry didn’t respond and slowly opened the door.
I turned to him and his eyes moved over my body. The hickey’s covered my chest area and trailed up to my collarbone.
Smiling widely, he placed his tongue on the side of his mouth, caught between his teeth.
“I don’t know what you mean. Looks normal to me.” he said.
I laughed and turned from him.
“Of course you don’t. Thanks. My parents are going to kill me.”
He smiled and came over to me.
We were both still naked.
Pulling me in his arms, he kissed my neck and peered at me from the mirror.
“Well if they kick you out, you can just come stay with me. I’ve got plenty of room at my place. And I’m never in town, so you’ll have lots of privacy.”
I didn’t respond as he kissed my ear next.
“Sorry babe.” he said.
“It’s okay. I enjoyed myself.” I said honestly.
He smiled and pulled away from me.
“Well then I’m going to get the stuff…and chocolate syrup too.” he said with a wicked grin.
“Kay.” I said putting on a smile, trying to garner some excitement.

He reached down and slapped my butt as he walked away.

“I’ll be back.” he said. “Don’t get dressed.” he warned. “We have a long night ahead of us.”
I nodded okay, and he disappeared out of the room.
I looked back at the mirror and just sighed.
How the hell was I going to get out of this one?

Notes

Hope you guys liked it! This was definitely one of my favorite chapters to write. If you did, leave a comment! :)