Changing My Life

Amy's POV
I woke up grinning like an idiot. I don't know how I will survive till tonight. But I have no details as to where and what time so I need to text him. It's so weird since we live together and we text each other, but I rather that then go ask him. I don't know what's going to happen at breakfast and lunch.
To Liam The Payne Train :*
Morning xoxo
To Amy :D
Good morning Beautiful xx
How can I not have a good morning after reading that comment. I mean come on, he's just too .....perfect.
To Amy :D
How are you love ? xx
To Liam The Payne Train :*
I'm great, yourself ? xoxo
To Amy :D
I'm amazing. So, What's up ? xx
To Liam The Payne Train :*
Nothing, just wondering what time we're leaving tonight and where we're going. It's all I can think about. xx
To Amy :D
Well, I'll pick you up at your door at 6 and it's a surprise. I can't wait, but I have to admit I'm a bit nervous. xx
To Liam The Payne Train :*
It could just be me and you, no need for anything too special. Being with you is enough. I just hope I won't embarrass myself. xx
To Amy :D
Awe love, me too. But tonight's going to be special. And I think I'm the one embarrassing myself tonight. xx
To Liam The Payne Train :*
If you can handle a million girls screaming your name at a concert I think you'll manage me :P xx
To Amy :D
I hope. Coming for breakfast ? xx
To Liam The Payne Train :*
Yeah, cya in 10 xoxo
To Amy :D
Great cya xx
I shot up from bed and got ready. I feel like I need to impress Liam so I decided to do a little makeup only to slightly impress, not to much though. And dress a little to impress. I picked up some leggings and a tank top. With a little mascara and my nerd glasses.
I went downstairs and bumped into Liam on the way.
"Hey" He said
"Hi" I said.
"Breakfast ?" He asked.
"Sure, I'll cook" I said and before he could protest I went to the kitchen. But Louis and Harry had beat me to it.
"Awe, I was gonna cook for you guys" I said pouting.
"It's our turn, now sit and enjoy the delicious goodness." Harry said wiggling his eyebrows and pushing me to the island of the kitchen.
"Fine" I said defeated. So I sat down and Liam sat in front of me. It was silent for a minute so instead we played on our phones then Niall came in.
"Hey guys, how about we go shopping today while Liam plan's the date ? We can buy some stuff to decorate your room, our treat. Then we can go for lunch and buy some clothes and stuff." Niall suggested.
"Sure, and can you get some groceries as well ?" Liam said.
"Sure, so what do you say Ams ?" Niall asked.
"Umm .. sure I guess." I said. Great because I don't know how to act around Liam until tonight.
"Breakfast is served" Chirped Louis. We ate and Niall filled him in on shopping. We went to get ready and met again at the living room at 10.
We piled in Louis's car and went to the mall. We went to some stores and got paint and stuff to decorate my room. Like lamps and duvets and carpets. I got them all in purple with black polka dots. After hours of shopping for stuff for my room I left them and went to go get some girl's stuff while they got groceries.
On my way there, a guy came up to me and tried to hit on me. He was buff and scary looking. He was covered in tattoos. He had a scary perverted look on his face. I froze when he approached me. It was happening again I could feel it.
"Hey there gorgeous, don't you have a nice bum. I would like to see it better," he said with a wink. He put his hands on my waist and dragged me to a bathroom stall near by. Covering my mouth so I couldn't scream. He locked the door and started kissing me. I had tears streaming down my face and was sobbing uncontrollably. I tried to get out of his grip but he was physically bigger than me so it was no use. He started undressing me and next thing I know I was naked alone in a stall.
I couldn't believe what happened to me.
I was raped.
I felt so dirty.
My first time was in a stall, with a creep.
I got dressed and left the stall, after standing there sobbing, shocked over what just happened. It was so painful. Blood was dripping down my legs and I felt so sore. I don't even know how I had the courage to do it but I left the stall limping because of the pain and made my way back after what felt like hours.
Niall, Louis and Harry came rushing towards me, concern written all over their faces. I must have been away for a long time or maybe it was my face that made them look concerned or the obvious blood stain on my pants.
"What the hell happened ?"
"Where were you ?"
"Oh my god are you hurt?"
I didn't know who was saying what or what they said after that because my vision was blurry with tears and I had a lot on my mind. I flinched as Harry grabbed my arm probably realizing I wasn't listening.
I'm so scared right now. I don't want anyone touching me. I feel dirty and vulnerable. I crawled in a ball on a bench and balled my eyes out. I could tell they were trying to comfort me but my vision was still blurry and I still couldn't focus on what they were saying.
After a while I realized that these were the guys, how could I be scared of them. They only wanted to help. So I tried to force words to come out. I blinked a few times to make my vision clear and could see Niall next to me on the bench and Louis in front of me crouching down to my level. Harry was on the phone, probably telling Liam.
"I-I ..." I tried but I couldn't. I took a deep breath and tried again.
"I w-was r-rap-ed" I finally blurted out.
They were shocked and out of words. I just went to fits of sobs again.
After they came back to reality, Louis carried me to the car. I sobbed in his chest, staining his shirt with my tears while he was cooing to me comforting words. The whole car ride I was sobbing on Niall's chest while he tried to comfort me the best he could. How could he or anyone else comfort me right now. All I wanted to do is die. I felt so dirty.
Louis parked the car and opened my car door and carried me inside. He set me on the couch next to a worried Liam. When I looked at him his face was flushed and he had red eyes. Clearly he had been crying. Not so long after he glanced at me he took me in his arms and cooed to me. I felt a tear on my neck, he was crying but trying to hide it. He was trying to stay strong for me. He kept whispering 'I love you' over and over again. I was too upset to be shocked but his words soothed me.
I felt safe in his arms. I knew no one would hurt me. My sobs died down after awhile. Liam had been holding me this whole time still whispering 'I love you'. I pulled away and met his eyes. I couldn't help it I blurted it out.
"I-I love you too" I said slightly smiling to show him I was feeling a bit better.
He smiled and pecked my cheek.
"Oh my god, are you bleeding?"
I followed his gaze to my lap were I had a huge stain of blood. I whimpered and bursted into another fit of sobs. He held me tight and kept on asking if I was okay. After a while I pulled away.
"I need a shower, I feel dirty" I said. I couldn't stand my body anymore.
"Let me take you upstairs" Liam said.
"Wait not yet" I paused "I-I'm scared" I had to tell him. I had promised him. I couldn't trust myself.
"He won't get you here, love. you're safe with me, you have us" He said gesturing to the boys, who where still there looking at me sympathetically.
"No, I mean I'm scared because .... I-I don't trust myself. I f-feel d-dirty and I w-want to d-die" I said. I had to tell him. It would break him I know but he said to tell him whenever I felt like that and I truly didn't trust myself so I had to tell him. I can't disappoint him. Normally, at the thought of cutting or suicide I would just do it. But now it's different. I'm different.
They looked at me scared and on the verge of tears. You can't blame me though, my whole life sucks, the only time it got good it went bad straight away. I was so looking forward to my date tonight why did this have to ruin everything ? Why did I have to ruin everything ?
Because you don't deserve to live.
"Listen to me," Liam said taking my hands in his and making me look at him. "You have been through hell and back, I understand why you feel like that. But like I said, you have been through hell and back, you're strong and determined. I know you can make it, I know you can do it. I can't loose you. I love you"
I had tears in streaming down my face. He knew exactly what to say. Wow, I definitely don't regret talking to him about this, he really helped. I nodded to assure him he said the right words that helped. He loved me and he showed me that he did. I truly saw that he meant it.
"T-thanks Liam, I love you too. It helps having someone say that. I promise I won't do anything." He nodded and hugged me. I pulled away and looked at the time it was 4. Wow it was really late.
"Okay, I'm going to take a bath and try to relax. Then get ready for our date." Everyone looked at me like I was crazy. I guess they didn't think I would go or that I forgot about it. To be honest I was rethinking it but after Liam assured me and made me feel better I decided that I'm not going to let anything ruin the good in my life. He loves me, I want to go, I really do. I have to get my mind off of things somehow, Liam helps. If I stay home I will probably stay in bed crying so I think it's best if I go out. Besides if good things are ruined with bad things might as well keep on having great things either way.
"A-are you sure ? We can postpone it or stay and watch a movie or something I get it." He said but I shook my head no.
"No, I want to go. I woke up looking forward to this and I'm not going to miss it. I refuse to let anything happen to the good things in my life. If I stay here I might stay in bed crying to myself. I much rather go out with you." I said reassuringly.
"Okay then, if you say so. I'm so proud of you. You can back out though even if it's last minute, I totally understand" He said. He was really concerned. I just love him too much. He's just perfect.
"Thanks Liam, I'm going to get ready see you in a few yea ?" I said
"Sure thing love, I'll be here if you need me" He said. I hugged him again and pecked his cheek then went upstairs.
I texted Ashley and told her to be here in like an hour. I took my clothes off, grabbed my bag and stepped in the bath after I filled it up. I shaved, relaxed and cleaned up. Then I got out dried my hair a little with the towel and put on some shorts and a T-shirt along with my glasses. I wobbled downstairs because I was still soar, got some ice cream and plopped on the sofa next to Liam cuddling to him a bit, eating ice-cream and watching T.V. He kissed my forehead occasionally. Every time he did that I smiled and cuddled more into him. After I devoured a tub of Ben and Jerry's, Ashley arrived.
"Hey babe" She said as I greeted her at the door.
"Hey" I said hugging her. We went to the living room and I could tell she was nervous to see Harry.
"Umm, we're going upstairs to get ready, see you later" I said.
"Yea I'm gonna beautify her for you Liam" She told him, winking. We both blushed then Liam said the most adorable thing causing me to blush more, gee thanks Liam.
"She's already beautiful, you're just gonna help make her even more pretty than she already is."
Then everyone awed and Liam blushed and smiled at me.
We went upstairs and she helped me get ready.
I still don't know where he's taking me. She did my hair and make up and we talked for a bit. I told her what happened and she hugged me saying that I was really strong. I mean if I had to admit it they were right, I have been through a lot and I was dealing with it well, surprisingly not deciding on the easy way out.
When it was time Liam knocked on my door. I hugged Ashley and opened the door to reveal a very hot Liam in a nice shirt and pants. He held out his hand and ushered me downstairs with Ashley following behind. She was going to stay and hang with Harry then sleep over with me when we get back. I'm glad for that, because at least I won't be alone at night. I know I felt better when Liam talked to me but I still don't trust myself a hundred percent.
The drive to the mysterious place consisted of me and Liam kareoking badly which made it funny. I felt like I was lost in happiness. Like I was drunk with laughter. I love this feeling and being with Liam made it better. Soon enough we made it to the park. We got out and walked around holding hands. I had to say I was really hungry since I ate nothing all day due to the events that happened. And was a little disappointed to be at the park but I was with Liam and I was happy so it didn't matter.
We walked around chatting when we made it to a blanket and a picnic basket. Damn, he was so romantic and perfect.
"Liam, you didn't have to" I said.
"I know but I wanted our first date to be perfect and special, so I sort of had to" I giggled happy with the fact that he thought about this.
"You know, this isn't only our first date. It's also my first ever date in my life and it's perfect" I said sheepishly.
"I'm honored to be your first and that you're enjoying it" he said. I was too. The Liam Payne was my first date.
We talked and ate till we just laid their on the blanket on our backs cuddling, looking at the sky. Pointing to stars and trying to make shapes.
He looked down at me staring at my eyes. I got lost in his eyes not realizing he was leaning in. I was about to have my first kiss. With The Liam Payne. The love of my life. Gosh I love him.
He crashed his lips with mine and we moved in sync. It was perfect, fireworks everywhere. I couldn't ask for a better night or a better date or a better kiss. I couldn't ask for a better man other than Liam Payne.
We pulled away and I couldn't keep it in anymore.
"I love you, I have loved you ever since I laid eyes on you on the X factor. I have followed your music journey the best I could through social media like a creep, stalking you. I got heart broken every time I heard a rumor of you dating or seeing a picture of you with a girl but happy at the same time to see you happy. I have loved you and fallen in love with you even more as time passed and you didn't know I exist. I was trilled to meet you in person, to even get the chance to live with you and now kiss you. I have never been this happy. I love you so much" I crashed my lips with his. I couldn't believe I blurted all that out. He must think I'm nuts.
"I have loved you ever since I walked through McDonald's that day. The lads saw me staring and instantly pulled me to your booth. You thought we didn't see you, but I spotted you immediately. How could I not. You were sitting in the back trying to hide but you stood out. When I came up close to you I was stunned with your beauty I admired all your features. I felt sparks when our hands brushed together. I fell in love with you even more when I heard you sing for the first time and even more when we sang together. I was overjoyed when you agreed to our date and so upset to see you breakdown. I made it my mission no matter what I am to you, friend, boyfriend, enemy, acquaintance, no matter what I am to you I will make sure you smile. I'm so in love with you". We kissed again. His words were so meaningful and powerful. Full of love and passion. I knew he loved me.
When we made it home from the best night ever we saw them all in the living room. Louis and Niall were watching T.V. and Harry and Ashely were cuddling together talking.
"How was the date love birds ?" Louis teased.
I looked at Liam and smiled.
"Perfect" I said still looking at him. I could just stare in his eyes all day, I would get lost in them. I could see love and compassion in them.
We said our good nights' and went upstairs. He stopped at my door and kissed me again. Every time we kissed it felt so amazing, sparks everywhere. I felt loved. He pulled away.
"Goodnight, I love you" I said.
"I love you too, sweet dreams" He said. He pecked my lips and I pecked his cheek. He went to his room and looked at me before going in.
I plopped on my bed and changed to comfortable clothes. He texted me soon after. He's so cute.
Liam's POV
It was the best date ever. God I love her. When we kissed, I swear I was in heaven. I had to text her.
To Amy :D
Best night ever, movie tomorrow ? xx
From Amy :D
For sure thanks for everything you did today Liam, I appreciate it. Uh, yeah what time ? xoxo
To Amy :D
Anytime love, umm ... 6ish ? xx
From Amy :D
Great :D I love you Liam, goodnight :* xx
To Amy :D
Can't wait, goodnight babe. I love you too :* xx
I'm so lucky to have her. I'm so happy to be with her and to make her happy. I hate how her life is so hard on her. She's so strong to have survived all that. At least it's turning to the best carrier wise anyway and with me.
I didn't expect her to come tonight considering what happened. If I ever see that guy I will tear him apart. She was so crushed, she felt so dirty. She wanted to die because of him. She was probably upset that her first time was with that guy. I wanted to be her first time. I wanted to make it special. I was her first date, her first kiss. He stole that from me. He broke the woman that I love but I'm determined to fix her no matter what. May he rot in whatever hell he lives in. How can he live with himself ? Has he no respect ? I couldn't bare to see her like that. I blurted out my feelings seeing her in that state.
I'm glad I got to make her feel better and help her move on from it. I'm glad she told me that she was feeling like cutting and that she wanted to commit suicide. I'm glad I helped her and made her feel loved.
I'm glad I get to sleep knowing I helped someone find a reason to live.

Notes