s i x t y n i n e - frustrated.
//if you want it to last forever, you can not rush it//
"Baby?" The word slips past my lips as I turn the lock on my bedroom door. Easily, I am picking up her glorious scent so I am aware she is near me - she's just out of my sight. A smile forms on my lips as I smell the sweetness of her body wash floating in the air. "Harry?" Julianne's angelic voice says my name so beautiful every single time, I would be fine if it were the only thing I ever got to hear for the rest of my days.
"There you are. You're early." Julianne appears in the doorway of my bathroom and within half a second my heart begins to violently bounce around in its cage. Her body is covered with only a white towel carefully tucked underneath her arms. Blush arises to her cheeks and she looks away from me, her hair falling to cover her face.
"I knew.. this was.. st-stupid." She mutters quietly to herself, but she knows I heard her. She heads to the end of my bed, a place she hasn't been before. Sure, she's sat on the edge a few times but she's never slept in it. I usually went down to her room, but I believe things will change very soon. "No, baby. It isn't stupid." I rush to her side and hit my knees as soon as I reach her.
Those blue eyes are now dull as her sadness has taken her over. "Don't be upset, darlin'." I press a hand to the side of her thigh, the part that the towel isn't hiding from me, and the other cups her cheek, holding her steady so her eyes are on mine. "Please.. show me the surprise, yeah?" I insist, a smile lightly coming to my face. "It's.. stupid." She shakes her head in denial at me, clearly not wanting to go through with this idea she suddenly had not that long ago.
"Julianne, listen to me baby." I say, this grabs her attention and she stares straight at me, her attention trained on me. "Nothing you do is stupid, baby. I waited thirteen minutes.. you can't leave me hanging." I give her a wink at the mention of my impatience, she asked for fifteen but I couldn't survive the last two minutes. "P-promise me.. you.. you won't.. tell them." Julianne's tongue darts out to lick over her bottom lip - God, the things I'd do to have that tongue on my lips, in my mouth, instead.
I push aside the sexually frustrated thought and nod to her, "I promise." At first, I was curious as to why she didn't want me to speak about it but I soon reminded myself about their very nosy ways. They always think they know what is going on between us and they are usually swearing up and down that they know what's best for us - what I should do, what I shouldn't. They don't deserve to know anything we do.
"I don't tell them about anything we do.. that's.. intimate in any way." I assure her, my hand dropping from her face and falling to grasp her waist. She takes a deep breathe, exhaling slowly as she stands up in front of me. I join her quickly reaching my feet, my hands still on her body. Without any words, her fingers slot with my own and she begins the walk to the bathroom, leading me like a lost dog. I don't mind it though, she could chain me up to a pole and I'd still be content with it all.
"I was goin' to use your soap but it was too strong." She tells me, getting a glance over her shoulder just as we enter the bathroom. A pleased sigh leaves my mouth as I see she's filled my tub with water and bubbles, the air is invaded by the nice scent of strawberries and cream - the soap she bathes in all the time. A few candles are sitting on the sink's counter, the vanilla aroma mixes beautifully with everything.
"It relaxed me the first time.. so I figured.. it would do the same.. for you." Julianne releases my hand and steps behind me, shutting and locking the door. I await for her to return back to her spot in front of me before saying anything. "You.. are.. amazing." I tell her as I allow my hand to slide to the side of her warm neck, her soft hair brushing against my skin. "I know." She gives me a cute giggle before grasping my wrist. To my surprise, she yanks my hand down and shakes her index finger at me.
"You need to relax. You're way too tensed." She explains just as her fingers hook the hem of my shirt. Carefully, she begins to pull it up, painfully peeling it off slow and steady, wanting it off of my body completely. I let her get as far as she could, until her height allowed her no more. I finish the task for her and drop my shirt to the floor. Her hand falls onto my abdomen moments later, her eyes staring at the tattoos inked into my skin.
They easily captivate her pretty mind, I'm not sure why. Perhaps she likes the way they look. Whatever the reason, I love it when her eyes trail all over me, it makes me feel special. It's cliche, but it's true. The way this girl looks at me, her eyes admire my face, my body, my imperfections - she loves me. And it's incredible, especially to know that I do the same to her.
" 'm gettin' a new one soon." I mumble softly as her other hand touches my waist. She tilts her head back, those pretty eyes hitting mine instantly. "What is it gonna be?" She questions, curiousness taking over her gorgeous face. "It's a secret." Her eyes roll at my comment and all I can muster is a smirk. If she only knew the secret - I bet she'd love it. I know she will.
"Sorry.. if I mess up." Julianne carries on with the removal of my clothes, her fingers touching the buckle of my belt. "Don't rush it, love. You'll do fine." I assure her with a quick peck to her temple. She blushes hard at my affection, but bravely continues on anyways. She gets my belt open, exposing the button and zipper of my jeans. Cautiously, most likely from the fear of what she's about to reveal, she undoes the button. Her fingertips grasp the zipper and she slowly drags it down, so slow that I might just explode.
My strong attempt at keeping my lower region calm is becoming harder by the second, yet I stay in control and remember to relax myself. She doesn't need to see me get a hard on - not yet at least. Each of Julianne's hands grab a hold of the waist band of my jeans and she pulls them down, without taking my briefs with her.
"Ha-harry." She mumbles as she helps me get the fabric from around my ankles. "Yeah, babe?" I ask as she leans back up once she kicked away my jeans. "C-can I take.. my.. my t-towel off?" She nervously utters, eyes avoiding my intense stare. "This is your arrangement, dear, do whatever you want." I try to give her some encouragement by reminding her she is indeed the one that put all of this together. "There isn't anything to be afraid of. We've done this before." I remind her, my lips hitting her forehead once again. Assurance is something she needs, and I am willing to give it to her whenever I can.
She takes a few small steps backwards, her eyes roaming up my body until they lock with my own. Her face is flushed, along with the skin covering her neck and shoulders - I know it's only from the intimacy. I don't blame her, I'm warm in places as well. While keeping her stare fixed on me, she grabs the edges of the towel and loosens it on her curvy body, so damn perfect.
I bite the inside of my cheek as I watch her slowly let the material slip out of her palms - directly falling onto the floor in puddle around her. A steamy sigh comes out of my throat as I witness her bare beauty. It's something I have witnessed before, but I swear every time it gets more and more wondrous to see. She keeps things short, returning close to me just a moment or two later.
Without hesitating, she slides her fingers into the waistband of my briefs and curves them, grabbing a hold of the fabric. But, like I highly expected, she doesn't yank them down as well. Instead, she freezes entirely and anxiously looks up at me. "Don't be scared. It's just me." My words are released in a calm voice, something that will make her feel better about things and ease her tense nerves.
Julianne appears as if she is about to make a move, but she comes to another halt. "I.. I-I.. ca-can't." She shakes her head from side to side, releasing my briefs from her grip. The fabric hits against my skin, taking the place of where her fingers were just at. "Baby." I mumble the name out, the one that makes her cheeks turn pink and her lips softly shape into a smile, while I take a hold of her shaking hand. I bring it back to where it was before and I slide her fingers inside my briefs again. She hooks the band like before, yet she stills herself. Soon, I do the same to the other hand.
"Don't be scared. It's only me." I mutter to her, my eyes burning onto her pale skin. She's so gorgeous, especially when she's looking at me. Her blue eyes sparkling like crystals, her pretty pink lips stuck between her teeth out of nervousness. "I.. I don't.. want.. t-them to.. m-make fun.. of.. me.." Her words come out in stammers, immediately capturing my entire focus. What on earth is she talking about?
"Darlin'.. they aren't going to know about this." I let go of her wrists, despite fearing that she might drop her touch from my body a second time. My hands press against her warm cheeks, raising her head so that I can see all of her beauty. "You aren't doing anything wrong, sweetheart. Take your time and relax. It's just you and me in here.. alright?" My lips touch her forehead, leaving a few kisses over her soft skin. Julianne gives me a soft nod as a reply. My hands leave her face and she lowers her head, her eyes traveling down to my lower half.
I want her to understand that everything is going to be okay, she isn't doing a thing wrong and it certainly isn't a stupid decision. She's so innocent, so shy - that's one reason why she won't allow herself to gain the courage to do this. I know she wants to, I can see it when she looks me in my eyes - better than anything, I can feel it.. because I want this to. Of course, it's nothing major, but I know that seeing that part of my body has frightened her in the past, even though I don't want it to.
There are a few things that I wish could be different, and one of those just happens to this. I have a desire for her to overcome this fear and just do it, but I know it must be hard for her to do. It was extremely difficult for her to handle me removing her clothes, so I can only imagine how she must feel while taking off mine this go around.
"You... are.. really... hard." Julianne's words make my eyes bulge out of my head - however, all of a sudden, I realize that she's referring to the muscular build. Her finger is sliding against my pronounced v-line. "Y-yeah." I breathe out, closing my eyes for a moment to collect my filthy thoughts and intentionally shove them out of my head. "Ha-harry." Julianne's tone gives me the impression that she's unsure about something, quite nervous if anything else. I look down at her, just to find those eyes staring back up at me.
"What's the matter?" I question with a furrow of my brows, I thought things were smooth sailing for a moment, but apparently I am incorrect. Her gaze drops suddenly to my crotch before she lifts it back to my eyes, not wanting to stare too long down there. While she glues her gaze to my face, I allow my eyes to go down to where she went - straight to the extremely visible, prominent bulge in my underwear.
"S-shit." My hand flies over my fully erected, but thankfully hidden, member. "I'm.. s-sorry." I turn away from her, feeling my own face catch flames. It's nothing I should be embarrassed about, but quite frankly I am. She was only trying to make me feel better after earlier, do something nice and romantic for me and I can't even let her shine in her own moment. I ruin everything, clearly.
"It.. It'll g-go a-away." I attempt to speak but my words are cracked and broken up, just another sign of my complete embarrassment. I hear her behind me taking slow and steady breaths, this has to be horrifying for her. I know how much this meant to her and I just completely spoiled the whole night. Great, there goes any chances I might have possessed of having a good time with her.
"It's.. o-okay." Her small hand touches against my waist, causing me to gulp harshly. She can't just be alright with this. "J-just let it go a-away.. then we.. we can keep g-going." I insist, stepping forward, her hand falling from my body. Julianne lets out a heavy sigh, her hand returning to my body just a second after it fell. "Please.. don't.. be upset." She whispers as her arms snake around my waist, her hands resting on my abdomen - her forehead presses against my back.
I do not respond in any way, I just let my eyes watch her hands. Her small, soft hands on my body - this is definitely not making anything better for me. "Please." Her gentle plea pulls a reply out of me, her intention I'm sure. "I.. I messed this up." I admit this to her, she is probably aware that I have completely ruined her thoughtful plan.
To my utter surprise, Julianne lets a laugh roll out of her body. "You're so silly, Harry." She removes her embrace from my body and walks in front of me, a smile spread across her lips. "You didn't mess up anything." She shakes her head lightly, making me more confused than I already am. "Yes I-" She cuts me off quickly, before I could even get a good start, "You act like I haven't ever seen it or felt it before."
My eyes grow wide at her words, has she noticed me more times than I have myself. My reaction must've been easily noticeable because she is fast to add on to her previous sentence. "While we're sleeping. It.. It doesn't.. bother me. It's.. it's natural." The stuff coming out of her mouth has be utterly speechless, so bad that my jaw is hanging down and my eyes are as wide as they ever been.
"Wh-what?" She asks with a slight giggle, probably not understanding me at the moment. "You're just.. okay with this?" I say, glancing down at my bulge before meeting her pretty eyes again. Speaking of her eyes, she rolls them dramatically at me while laughing softly. "Harry., it's nothing. Now.. please let me finish." Her hands grab my waist and she yanks me forward, taking me by surprise quite frankly.
"You're the one that mentioned it, love." My murmur draws a snicker out of her, along with the gentle shake of her head. "Just relax." She pushes aside the fact we were literally just discussing my hard on. "I.. I can't b-believe you're.. you're going through with this." I admit to her just as she gets a nice hold on the waistband of my Calvin Klein's.
Julianne's eyes lift, catching my gaze automatically, "We only live once." She shrugs gently, as if it's no big deal to her - but I believe she's just coating her nervousness with this new found bravery. I like it. I do not reply to her words, mainly because I have no time to gather anything up. With a swift move, Julianne pulls down my briefs and releases them - seconds later they hit the floor and spill out around my feet.
She only took once glance at it, her eyes return to mine. She gives me a stern look as she takes a deep breath, "This bath better relax you." She gives me a cold expression, but I easily can tell she's just messing with me. Those gorgeous pink lips turn up into a smile as her small fingers slot with mine. Before I could process all of this, she's leading me to the tub.
My tub, similar to the one in the cabin, is quite large and can easily fit two bodies in it - that's kind of the reason I purchased it and replaced the one that was much smaller. Julianne's hand escapes my hold unfortunately. My sudden disappointment vanishes when she gestures for me to get in the water. I gladly do as I am commanded.
I drop my foot into the water, the hot burn of the water makes me immediately feel less tense. I throw my other leg in, trying my best to ignore my erection, and I lower myself down. The scorching water engulfs my body, burning away all the tension in my muscles and nerves. God, this has to be her best idea yet.
This couldn't get better, could it? I'm soaking in a nice, relaxing bath with some really wonderful smelling soap. My girl is bare beside me, her eyes are sticking to me like glue. She deserves the world, and I should be doing every little damn thing for her - yet here I am, sitting in a bath she drew up for me. She wants to take care of me, and God I wish she knew how much that means to me.
"How does it feel?" Julianne's voice brings me back to reality. I tilt my head back to look at her beautiful face, "Fuckin' great." I sigh out as I let my eyes close, taking in the entire vibe of the moment. She giggles at my reaction, her hand comes to the back of my head, those precious fingers begin to comb through my messy hair.
"You needed it." She kneels down beside the tub, propping her other arm on the edge. I turn my head to observe her features without disturbing her finger work. "You just explode sometimes.. You get so overworked, dear." Her right eye drops to a wink as she says the cute pet name, one I use on her quite often. I smirk faintly at her, "It's hard dealing with everyone." I am quick to justify my behavior, despite not really feeling the need to do so.
"I know. You're the Alpha, I get it." She nods slowly, her eyes focusing directly on mine, "But you have to remember to relax at times." Without a response from me, she leans forward and presses her wondrous lips to my forehead. Julianne begins to move as if she was going to stand, so as a reflex I quickly grab her wrist and keep her arm on the tub.
Her eyes grow just a bit at my sudden rough action, "Aren't you joining me?" My brows are furrowed, a ounce of fear has come out of nowhere. "I have to stand up first, Harry." I let her go and she does just as she said, easing my worry some. "You definitely don't know how to relax." Her grin is gentle, but noticeable.
Julianne gets in with her back to me, carefully sitting down between my legs. She releases a sigh of pleasure, the water must have had the same effect on her. Once she gets comfortable and still, I lean forward and press my chest against her, my arms snaking around her waist. She leans back against me, melting straight onto my skin. My lips find her ear and I gently kiss her lobe, causing a ticklish laugh to fall from her lips.
"This is wonderful, thank you, doll." I whisper quietly, my teeth coming into contact with her smooth skin. She turns her head just slightly, which allows me better access. "Don't thank me. You deserve it." She says, the fingertips of her left hand trace patterns over my knuckles while her right hand is curled around my forearm, but it doesn't wrap around it completely. That's one thing I surely do adore about this woman - she's small in the right areas, and thicker in the perfect locations.
"What you makes you think I deserve anything, hmm? If anything.. you deserve it." My teeth return to nibbling on her squishy skin, her ears are just so soft and delicate. "You always do things for me." She huffs out, seeming partially annoyed by what I said. I don't take her indistinct anger to heart, however. "Besides.. you never get anything."
"Hm.. That isn't true, baby." Yet again, I retort what she says. Without hesitation, I drop my lips to her shoulder, not caring if I get a few pieces of hair in my mouth as I close my lips around an area of smooth, fragile skin. She gasps as I bite down on the region, but not with my sharper teeth - those are put away until another day. Her rather sharp fingernails dig into my skin, tugging a throaty moan out of me. It vibrates against her skin, making her sweet lips part in awe - the feeling must have felt like waves crashing down on her.
For a moment, I debated on whether or not to keep my mouth here forever. My decision is to let her sensitive skin go, she bruises entirely too easily. "I get to be with you every single day. That's the best thing in the world." I feel the heat rising to her skin, informing me that she's indeed blushing in places aside from her cheeks. "Pl-please don't.. make this.. a-about me." Julianne struggles to speak, but her tight grip on my arm assures me she's alive and well.
"Thank you for everything you do, baby. You mean everything to me." My lips fall back to her skin, planting pecks across her shoulder. She shudders a little, making me tighten my grip on her body. She's fits so perfect against me. "Ha-harry." Julianne's sweet voice breathes out my name, a sound so magnificent to hear. "Hmm?"
I hear a small, barely audible breath slide out of her mouth before any words do. "It-it.. h-hasn't.. g-gone.. a.. away yet." Julianne's voice is so shaky, cracking right down the middle. I swallow the huge lump that immediately formed in my throat the moment my brain processed her words. For just a couple of moments I remain quiet behind her, trying to come up with a reaction - one that didn't involve my member.
Surprisingly, my mind overpowered my entire body and my mouth popped open, there was no stopping the shit that came out. "I know.. I.. I thought about.. m-making it go a-away.. but.. I.. I don't know." Julianne had nothing to say about that, the only response I could get from her is the gentle brush of her fingertips against the top of my hand. I can feel her eyes staring down at where my hands lay on her body, a sign that she's being a bit nervous right now, shy even.
"H-how would.. you.. d-do that.. e-exactly?" The sound of her voice entering the room shocked me, I did not expect her to verbally reply at all - due to the nature of the topic. I take a deep breath, slowly letting it back out along with my explanation, "I was.. going to.. get off."
Silence began to suffocate me - I'm not quite sure if she's feeling the same. My lungs are gaining weight and my heart is slowing down. Could those six words actually kill me? "Well.. w-why.. do.. you not.. want to do that?" Julianne's voice is growing stronger, however the fact she's beyond nervous is still very noticeable. Without waiting for me to reply, she grabs my wrists and pulls my hands away from her body.
"B-baby, w-what are you d-doing?" I ask apprehensively, a mild fear begins to jump around in my mind - is she upset with me? Disgusted at the least. My hands grab for her hips as she begins to stand up. A faint laugh comes from her as she pushes me away once again, throwing daggers straight through my heart. "Just.. relax." She says in a low voice.
I try to do as she insists, so I shut my trap. She doesn't remove herself from the water, only scoots further away from me. She draws her legs up, her hands holding onto her feet as she tries to get comfortable. "J-julianne.. Wh-what are you doing?" I ask with furrowed brows, despite her not being able to see the confusion that's swept across my face.
"Just.. ha-handle it." She stutters just a tad as those three words come out of her mouth, making my cheeks flush. "A-are you.. s-sure?" I ask, my own voice is trembling. I shouldn't have to worry about her staying strong, it seems as if I need to be concerned with my own damn strength. "This seems very.. inappropriate." I add to my short ramble, how did things lead to this? "Yes. I'm sure. Just.. do it."
Once her confirmation comes out, I act upon her words. My hand lowers into the water and I carefully wrap it around myself. My eyes staring straight at the back of her head. This can't actually be occurring, right? I mean, shit. I've been trying to hold back all the sexual things since the day she got here - but now that she's a few inches away from me and she's completely naked.. it's quite difficult to do so.
Water droplets dance down her skin, such pure innocence and beauty she is. A grunt erupts in my throat just as I begin to drag my hand down my shaft, my mind focusing on how her body looks when it's bare. Since I can't exactly see much of it now, thanks to her hiding from me, I picture her chest. God.
"F-fu-" My voice is low as I take in all the feelings, the intimacy of the moment is driving me fucking insane. Inside of my head, I am reliving the night I undressed her so slowly and gently, removing the bathing suit from her body. I can easily, vividly remember the way I exposed her skin so carefully, watching closely as I unveiled her glorious figure. The sound the soaked fabric made when it hit the ground echoes in my brain - the memory of her full body, entirely bare in front of me, all the little sparks that erupted inside of me as I saw her that way - it's all flooding my mind, coming back to me. And I, for one, do not mind at all.
I quickly come to my senses after yanking myself out of my tangled up mind - and I realize that I'm moaning like my life depends on it. "J-jul-julianne." I mutter her name out between groans. Her steady breathing and heartbeat pounding in my ears assures me that she's really here in front of me - that this is actually happening. "Y-you're s-so.. f-fuckin'.. b-beautiful." The amount of pleasure racing through my body at the moment is almost unbearable.
Just as fast as I began, I come to an abrupt end. I unwrap my hand from around my member and lean back, heavy breathes filling the air. Using the small measure of dignity I have left, I drop my hands in the water and make sure that I hide my still fully erected shaft - I might just die if she laid her eyes on it, again. I didn't come to a climax, only because I feel like a terrible fucking person right now. Silence starts to surround the two of us, Julianne's back is still facing me and she currently seems content with herself.
There is only one reason why I halted my actions. For some odd reason I felt like I was being a complete asshole. Honestly, though, I'm not entirely sure why I feel that way. Maybe it's because I was receiving pleasure when in reality that's all I want her to get. Or perhaps knowing that she's listening to me attempt to get off that has caused this.
"A-are.. you.. f-finished?" Julianne's voice breaks out - making my heart jump slightly. For a minute or two, I keep my lips locked up - I don't know what exactly to say or how to even explain this. My heart is racing beyond the safe limits, and my lungs are heaving - how do I tell my girlfriend that I stopped jerking off because she's in here with me - because her presence bothers me? That has to be one of the most offensive things anyone could say to their significant other. It's not simply that, I just don't know how to explain it any other way.
"Ha-harry?" Julianne's head slowly turns so that her eyes can peer over her shoulder, staring right at me. My body freezes up and I just sit there with my mouth agape - my eyes wide and glued to her concerned gaze. "I'll take.. that as a.. yes?" She unsurely says as she rises up just enough to effortlessly push herself back against me.
I only lift one arm out of the water, and it goes around her waist to bring her as close as possible, my other remains hidden from her. Of course she can probably feel my hand against her back, but I pray to God that she won't question it. "Um.. Harry." Julianne says with a soft tone, oh my God here we go again. I should have known this wouldn't work. Why on earth did I ever even stop moving my god damn hand?
"Yes?" I keep myself composed, for my own damn sake at this point. Julianne lays back against my body, her head on my shoulder. She shifts it just a smidge, enough for her eyes to look up at me. I lower my view so that I can look into those precious eyes she has. "You're still.. hard." She mumbles the word so quietly, if I didn't have enhanced abilities I might not have heard it at all.
"No.. I.. um. I.. haven't gone down yet. Give me.. a minute.. or two." My efforts aren't that great, but at least I gave it a shot. "Harry." Her sigh is a sign to me that she quickly dismissed my claim. "What?" I ask, trying to keep myself relaxed so she doesn't pick up on my nervousness. "I'm not a guy... but I know it.. that it takes more than.. a minute.. to.. to release."
"I-I.. um." My throat begins to tighten up on me, forcing me to swallow the thoughts I planned on letting out. She shakes her head a few times from left to right, as if she were ashamed by something. Dear God, please tell me she isn't upset with me. "I'm not.. a.. a turn on.. I guess." Those faint words hit me like a million bricks, she believes she is the reason why I didn't climax.
Julianne surprisingly pushes my arm from around her and she stands up in the water, her intentions are to fully get out this go around though. I can't stop her - I can't muster the courage nor strength to say anything to her. Without another word or even a glance in my direction, she throws a leg over the tub.
Before I could comprehend what just occurred, both of her feet are placed on the rug beside the tub and she's reaching for the towel sitting on the rack. She unfolds it and quickly wraps it around her body, blocking my view of her. Julianne makes a trip to the door, in which she slams shut as she exits my bathroom - heading to where I hope is my bedroom and no further.
Immediately, after letting that settle deep into my skin, I jolt out of the water and yank the other towel from the rack. I copy her actions and put the towel around my dripping body. I hurry across the bathroom, careful not to slip on the tile, and I quickly open the door. Just as I was about to run down the stairs and all through the god damn house to look for her - my feet stick to the floor as my eyes take in the sight of her sitting on the end of my bed, her hands cradling her head.
My horrible reaction to her, which I remind you was literally silence, is haunting me. The amount of stupidity I hold is slowly strangling me to death. I have never felt so down low and shitty before. I have made my girlfriend believe that she doesn't turn me on, when in reality she is the reason I have this erection. Has she forgotten that? We wouldn't be in this damn situation if she hadn't pointed it out to me. No, don't you fucking go there. This isn't her fault. It's no one's god damn fault.
"Julianne." I breathe out, allowing some of my nerves to relax. She's my girl - I am not afraid to speak to her, there's no reason I should be. "Baby.. listen to me." I place myself beside her on the bed, but she doesn't make any efforts to react to me. At this point, that's probably the best thing for the both of us. I slide my arm around her back, the soft fabric of the towel rubbing against my skin. I settle my hand on her hip, holding it as good as I can at the moment.
"You are such a turn on, Julianne. You're the only reason why I have a boner right now." Perhaps I could have started it off better than that, but at least I'm making an attempt to apologize and make her feel better. She should never feel like she isn't enough. She's already had to spend most of her childhood thinking that, I refuse to let her spend the rest of her days the same way.
"You are the most beautiful woman in the entire world. I love you so much." I lean in to her, making sure to bring her body as close as I can. She sniffles a few times, keeping her gorgeous face hidden from me still. I don't mind, as long as she listens to me. "I.. I didn't hit.. my release, alright." Obviously, Harry, way to go there. Pointing out the evident things now, I see. Mentally, I roll my eyes to myself - am I seriously arguing with my own voice in my head?
I shake all of that off and continue on with what I'm trying my best to explain to her. "I stopped after a minute.. I just.. it's not because of you, if that's what you think." I am quick to point this specific fact out - the main cause of all of this. "I honestly felt bad for doing that.. especially with you in there. Only because I.. I feel like I was the only one receiving any pleasure.. when in reality.. I want to give you as much as I possibly can."
She shifts a little beside me, her hands finally dropping from that pretty face. However, she keeps her head low - her hair acting like a curtain to hide her features. I don't move it out of the way, I'd hate to bother her or make her any more upset than she already is. "Th-that's a stupid excuse." My eyes widen as her words enter the room, I didn't expect her to reply so soon. "It's not a fuckin' excuse, babe." As usual, my voice raises and I automatically, involuntarily, get angry with what she just said.
I feel her eyes roam over my back as I walk away from her, I hold a heavy fear of lashing out on her. God knows the last thing I want to ever do is hurt her intentionally. "Not everything I say is a god damn lie." I throw my hands in the air as I turn to look at her, like I suspected her eyes are frozen on my body and she hasn't moved from her spot.
"There is nothing more I want.. than to make you happy.. every fucking day of your life," I find myself taking this conversation down another path, turning sharply before anything bad can happen. "But baby.. I can't do that if you don't trust me. I'm not lying to you." I relax my tensed muscles, this isn't entirely her fault. I must learn how to contain my anger and stop spazzing out every time something bad goes on between the two of us.
"I.. just.. don't understand.. why.. you stopped." She shrugs her shoulders at me as if it was nothing, but I can greatly tell that this is bothering her more than anything else before. "I stopped.." I take a deep inhale, her eyes following my movements as I take a few steps closer to her, "because I felt like I was being a bad boyfriend." I drop to my knees before her, one hand lifting to tough against the side of her thigh, the other remains at my side. "You're not a bad b-boyfriend, Harry." She gives me a soft smile, her small hand cupping my scarred cheek.
I grab her wrist gently and slide her hand closer to my mouth so that I can leave kisses on her smooth palm. A fire rises to her cheeks as I do so, she just adores the affection I gift her with regularly. "I'm a.. a bad g-girlfriend.. for not.. believing you." She breathes out in a low voice, her eyes struggling to keep contact with my own. But she stays strong and full of courage, her lips turn up in a slight grin. "You're the best girlfriend any one could ever have." I assure with a kiss to her knee, then a peck to the other one as well.
"I wish I could be as good to you as you are to me." Julianne admits the same moment I start a trail of kisses up her leg. I stop, despite not getting very far, and I raise my head so that we make eye contact once again, a beautiful thing I will never grow tired of. "Everything you do is perfect, don't doubt yourself, baby." I wink gently, my lips finding their way back to her soft legs. She giggles as I inch further up her thigh, her skin becoming more sensitive and soft, God I'm so glad she isn't skin and bones. I couldn't cuddle a bag of sticks.
My hands part her legs enough so that I could reach her inner thighs while still keeping a distance from her crotch. "Ha-harry." She softly moans out as I bite down onto her skin, her hand flies to my hair. It doesn't take but a second for those little fingers to get all tangled in my curls - she loves to mess with them. I lift my mouth off her body, hoping that I didn't hurt her. "M'sorry, dear." I whisper to her as I faintly kiss that same spot, just as a healing method.
"Mm, do it again." She pushes my head back down so that my mouth is squished against her thigh. I chuckle lightly, sending vibrations against her skin. She giggles above me, her other hand grabs a hold of my bare shoulder for support. I move half an inch to the left, closer to her center, but further from the tender spot I bit. I allow my teeth to sink into her skin again, but not too far to draw blood or cause her any harm. Of course, my fangs are tucked away - I have no intentions of using them any time soon on her.
However, by the way things are going tonight, sooner might come earlier than I expected. "You like this, hmm?" I mutter, my lips rubbing against her flesh as I speak. She laughs a little, her response so adorable and pleasing to my ears. "Keep going." She demands, holding my head down between her amazing legs. I move over just a tad, finding a new spot to anchor my teeth. Just as I bite down on her leg, she releases a throaty moan, full of pleasure and pure ecstasy, which doesn't help my existing boner at all.
- excuse errors... I will re-edit later
Oh my gosh. We are so fricking close to the end of this book and I am beyond excited for the sequel! I have SO much already written up! And a trailer in the works! (yep, I'm going old school and getting a trailer made!) I am super, duper happy about this! I have gotten over my insecurities about writing. If you have gotten this far in the story you must like something I do! Anyways, thank you so much for all your support! Feedback welcomed as usual, xx updates coming as well!! xo Hope you're all having a great summer break so far!
-also... Harry's got some pretty bold moves in this chapter, and so just Julianne ;) How are we feeling about that, hm??