t w e n t y e i g h t - sunshine.
//a single sunbeam can make the shadows disappear//
The cold midnight wind nipped at my skin - the cool temperature is still shocking to me. The season is entirely too warm for this kind of weather - but I'm not the one to complain, I enjoy the coldness of the air and chill of the night sky.
I heard the creak of the door, followed by the sound of footsteps on the wood. "Lost in your thoughts again, baby?" Zayn's smooth voice spoke into my ear as his warm arms wrapped around my waist. "I don't understand.." I breathe out, leaning my elbows onto the railing of the balcony. I never intended to wake Zayn from what was a good nap, usually he isn't here at this time.
It's been a long day, no one felt like leaving.
"What's bothering you?" He questions before his lips place a soft peck to my exposed shoulder. "If he loves her as much as he claims.. then why is he being distant?" My voice stays soft - I barely have enough energy to open my mouth.
"He's been through a lot, you know that. He told me.. he thinks she won't care for him.. because of the.. y'know." Zayn tells me, his hands rubbing over my stomach slowly. "It won't be much longer." He says in addition half a minute later.
I furrow my brows at his words, "Why do you think that?" I inquire, my mind jumbled by it now. I'm trying to pinpoint any reason why he would say that but nothing comes to the surface. "Earlier.. He was in the doorway of the dining room.. He watched the whole time, staring right at her." He states the obvious, I know this already.
"I know that, and he almost got caught." I mumble back, still uncertain about his claim. "He wanted to sit down so fuckin' bad. I saw it all over his face. He was craving her.. but he's scared." Zayn continues his explanation. "He isn't scared of anything." I scoff at his use of that word - it was a complete lie.
"He's scared of love. He's lived his entire life as an assertive person. He's always been controlling. When it comes to love.. He's afraid. He's never experienced it therefore he's doubtful." I let he words sink into my brain - processing all of the reasoning.
"If it isn't the love part.. then it's definitely the whole acceptance thing. He fears that he will frighten her." Zayn further states his thoughts, he's absolutely correct.
"When she heard his voice.. her eyes lit up. It was like she heard the song of the angels." I sigh lightly as I remind myself of what she done earlier tonight. "You ought to know the feeling... It's called true love." Zayn bite the side of my neck - earning a heavy moan from me.
"Still no luck?" Zayn asks, his hand rubbing circles into my stomach. He is referring to conception - we've been trying for so long, yet we can't get any positive results. "Nope."
I released a sigh as I rolled over onto my opposite side - my body believes it is morning but thanks to blazing sunlight entering the room I am assured that it is. What?
My body shot up from the mattress, my back straight as I sit frozen on the bed. Sunlight. I can see the rays in the room - lightning up the dust floating around in the air.
My eyes squint at the unfamiliar light source. My room us lit up with the natural light - setting me out of the norm for sure. I haven't been in the sunlight in so long - I'm shocked that it hasn't burned off my skin yet.
I throw myself off the bed - my feet pounding on the floor as I run to the window. The blinds are pulled up and the immense clarity of the clean glass blows my mind. My hands slam on the glass, my forehead soon following but not as hard.
The bright green summer grass covered the ground before extending past the forest line - the trees sat closer than I expected. The blaring sun was shining bright and partly high in the sky - the intensity resembles a golden globe. The blue sky was clear - not a single trace of a cloud anywhere as far as my eyes could see.
A flock of birds flew freely in the sky, returning to the woods. My eyes widen as I take in all of the beauty of the outside - despite the thick piece of glass keeping me from touching anything, it is so gorgeous. I highly assume there are bushes lining the house because there's two in front of the window, bright pink flowers that fade to a coral shade in the center.
A smile is etched on my lips as I witness Sara running around, two big dogs chasing and playing with her. The youthful glow and personality she owns is so magnificent to me. My smile grows even bigger as I see Niall run from out of nowhere - he joins the dogs and chases after the little girl.
I couldn't even enjoy the happiness because my mind began to wonder who did this for me. It had to happen over night, because I'm certainly sure the window was boarded up and the black curtain was over it.
Now, however, the wood planks are gone and there is a pair thick white curtains on the rail, they are so long that the ends are pilling up on the floor.
"Julianne?" Perrie's voice filled the air out of nowhere. I sharply gasp as I turn around on my heel to see her standing in the room, her body slumped against the wall. Her arms cross on her chest and she sends me a sly smirk.
"A few of us are having a late breakfast. Would you like to join us?" She questions me, completely dodging anything to give me any hintson why she smirked that way at me.
"S-sure." I say in a soft voice - which was the complete opposite of what was occuring inside my body. My heart is jumping, my head is spinning. I'm quite overwhelmed by this new gift. Sunshine. My blood is on fire and my heart is sparking.
"Fifteen minutes." She gives me a gentle wink before grabbing the door handle and stepping into the hallway, shutting me inside once again. However, for once, I don't mind it at all.
A laugh slips out of my mouth thanks to the pure joy flowing through my veins. I head over to the nightstand to grab my water bottle. I quickly yank it up, I need to find something to put on - nothing fancy that is, but defintely not these pajamas.
My eyes catch a glimpse of something white all of a sudden so my body comes to a standstill.
I swallow the lump forming in my throat as I lower myself to sit on the edge of the bed. I pick up the piece of paper that was folded over only once. My heart skips a unsteady, anxious beat as I see my name plastered on the paper in crisp black ink. It was in cursive but a tad messy. I ignore the handwriting and open the paper up.
My eyes trail over the words - my entire body begins to react. My teeth chew on the inside of my cheek, my palms become a tad sweaty, and my legs feel weak. I shake my head rapidly from side to side, this can't be true - not one little bit.
You deserve a little sunlight. You've been in the dark for far too long, my love. -H
I trace my fingertips over the words written on the paper, allowing my body to soak them in. "H.." I mumble the letter to myself, a delighted smile covers my face. "Harry." His name flows off my tongue gracefully - I'm so glad he decided to come around, well somewhat.
The door opened and I nearly let out a scream, having not expected that at all. Sophia revealed herself to me seconds later. She was grinning ear to ear - showing off her pearly teeth and her lipstick clad lips. "The food is almost done." She announces with a soft smile. I give her nod before letting my eyes fall to stare at the note once again.
"What's that?" She curiously asks as her feet carry her closer to me. I keep my lips sealed - this is something I find rather important to my heart - I'm not sure why of course but I can feel it, this means the world to me.
Perhaps its because I am well aware of who wrote this note, which answers my question about who opened up the window for me.
Harry took his time to do that for me - to rip off the nailed on boards and change out the curtains. He took away a majority of the darkness and allowed some light to peek into tbe room.
Maybe he felt sorry for me? Or maybe he done it out of the kindness of his heart.
"Do you like the window? Surely does brighten up the room." She smikes warmly as she sits down beside me on the bed. I appreciate the fact she ignored her previous words and carried along a new conversation with me. "Yes.. I adore it, actually." From the corner of my eye I can see her looking at me from our small distance.
"He hesitated at first." Sophia begins - it took me a moment or two to comprehend who she was referring to, but once I knew, I found myself not being able to ignore her. I desired to know what she has to say.
"He was worried that.. you'd be mad about someone invading your room. But I told him not to worry and that you would definitely enjoy some light.. and a glimpse of the outside." I mentally thank her for telling him that because it is indeed true.
"Can you.. tell him I said.. Thank you?" I turn my head just to meet her pretty eyes in a locked stare. "Of course. He'll be relieved to know you like it." She curves the corners of her mouth. "Why wouldn't I?" I breathe out as I lift myself off the bed.
Sophia stays seated as I guide myself to the window again, the magic of it all is very pleasing. The sun is beaming, the birds are chirping, and my heart is fluttering.
He really done this for me.
"It's so beautiful." I murmur the rest of my thought as I press my palm on the glass. "Whenever you're ready, we'll be in the kitchen, love." I hear Sophia say a few seconds before the door shuts - once again sealing me nside the newly found comfort of this room. I've never loved it until now.
I look down at the paper in my hand, the shock of it all is so unreal to me. However, I know that the normal aspects of reality don't exist here. So in some long, complicated, jumbled way... it makes perfect sense.
My newest decision might turn out to be a huge risk, but honestly I enjoy a good adventure every now and then, and I can't wait to see where this goes.
Before I could process it all, I was kneeling at the bottom of the closet whilst my hands were rummaging through my bag. I found a pen quickly so I took it out of my bag, along with my journal. I fall to my butt on the floor, facing the window so I could use the light to see. I cross my legs and sit my journal on my lap.
My hands are shaking but I try to muster up enough strength to flip towards the back of the journal. It opens to a blank page and I press the tip of the pen onto the top line, my thoughts spilling onto the paper thanks to the blue ink.
The hot coffee burns my insides in a good as it slides down my throat. My eyes linger to the hallway opening as I hear footsteps. Julianne appears with a soft smile on her lips.
"There she is." I say in a loud voice, grabbing the girls' attentions. "Nice to see you on this fine morning, love." Zayn tells her as she sits down at the end of the table. I watch with a grin as her eyes widen when Zayn sits the plate loaded with food in front of her.
"Breakfast is his speciality." Perrie gives out a gentle laugh before she starts to eat again. "So we heard about your gift." Zayn states as he takes a seat beside Perrie. The table in the kitchen is smaller than the one in the dining room but it gladly serves its purpose.
The kitchen grew silent again as we all continued to eat the nice food - Zayn slaved over the stove for nearly an hour and a half to make sure it was all perfect. "So.. Julianne-"
"Why did he refuse to turn on the lights the other night?" Her voice cut mine off and I literally almost choked because of her question. "Wh-what?" Zayn says in a soft tone, clearly taken back by her demanding tone.
She needed answers, and she's determined to get them.
"Why didn't he.. Why didn't Harry let me see him?" She pushed further, desperate to know everything about this place that has intrigued her curious mind - it's a shame to say that list is very long.
"Honey, we can't really explain it." Sophia says, placing her hand over Julianne's on the table. Sophia has always had that nurturing and calming personality - she makes things easier. "Well.. then who can explain it?" Julianne's eyes shift to gaze at Sophia, confusion and anxious worry swept over her innocent face. Little does she know..
"Ha-harry." Sophia nervously answers, but just like the rest of us, she knows good and well that Julianne owns little courage and she wouldn't dare herself to go find that explanation - to go search for him.
"Where is he?" Julianne stands from her chair and her barely touched plate of food. "Julianne.. seriously, it's not a big deal." Zayn copies her movements, intending on stopping her if she attempts anything. "It is to me." She huffs out, I've never seen this side of her - she's normally quiet and soft voiced, but not at the moment.
"Why's that?" Perrie proposes the question before I could. Julianne let her body fall in the chair, her arms folding on her chest and her eyes staring at the table.
"I have never had a family.. or even friends. But since I've been here.. I've felt so loved and I greatly appreciate everything you do for me." I furrow my brows at her reasoning, not really clear on how this relates to Harry. Before any of us could ponder the thought, she spoke once again.
"I just want to talk to him and.. and get to know him like I have with everyone else.. I want him to be my friend.. I just want to see him." She nervously bites her bottom lip - a sadden expression is plastered on her face, she's serious about this.
UPDATES.SOON. //// excuse errors please its 3:30 AM
It's July 23rd. 7 years.
So as a gift.. I will be posting the two big chapters (highly anticipated & important) before the day is over!!
Thoughts on H???