Fangirl

Luke and I stand in front of Gus (the tour bus), holding hands. Of course, while Michael and Calum boo and fake-cry at us and yell at Luke to hurry it up, but nonetheless, holding hands. I'm going to miss this. Them annoying slash amusing me, and Luke's warm hand. His hands are hardly ever cold, it's the greatest thing ever. And somehow I'm making the selfish and stupid decision to give that up for an entire year? What sort of idiot am I?

"You know," I say, a small chuckle escaping my mouth, "I almost kind of want to go now."

I glance over at Luke, the shock on his face making me grin. He takes a few seconds to turn and face me, trying to make sure I'm not lying or making some horrible joke that maybe he won't have to leave me in Los Angeles for a whole year. "Really?" He asks, eyebrows raised.

"I mean, yeah, but obviously we can't actually make that happen. You're leaving in like five minutes."

"Two, now!" Michael shouts from inside the bus.

"Two minutes." I repeat, smiling.

"N-No, that's fine, we can buy you stuff in Nagoya, you can still come with us!" Luke looks around, probably for his tour manager but maybe because he might've lost it just now.

"Riley's coming with us?!" I hear Ashton scream from inside. Quickly, three large, slightly punk rock toddlers come parading down the bus stairs and run over, yelling about how much fun it's going to be, which quickly ends when we all hear Ashton's last words be 'threesome'.

"What?" Luke asks.

"Nothing." Ashton says, staring at us all. "I wasn't talking about you guys." Quickly he speed walks back onto the bus, followed by Calum yelling about who's having a threesome.

"You have to go." Max says, pulling on my sleeve.

"I mean-" I glance at Luke, suddenly at a loss for words. "I can't."

"Okay, everyone here who identifies as a dude, please go elsewhere." Max orders, waving her hands at them. Luke and Michael slump away. "What do you mean you can't go? Isn't that like what you said the first time you were offered this?"

"That was different. Not going meant I would forever lose out on 5 Seconds of Summer. Now, Luke and I are living together and I'm best friends with all of them. Nothing will change if I don't go this time. And, I mean, think of the hate I'll get."

"You're so full of shit."

I raise my eyebrows. "Whoa, what?"

"You think nothing will change because they aren't gone yet. But you and I both know what's going to happen just within the first few months. You, sad, probably never leaving the house unless it's for work, clinging on to anything that makes you happy, which let's face it, the majority of that is Luke, which means you'll become clingy. And then Luke, shit, he's going to be a wreck without you. You guys stable each other out. Sure, a couple weeks and you're fine but you want me to believe you'll be okay with your true love travelling across the world for a year, barely having time for a video chat?"

"Oh my god."

"I'm right, I know."

"Luke!" I yell. I run up onto the bus. Before asking me if Max slapped me or not (because they probably all think that's what was going on), I tell him: "I'll go."

Slightly expecting one of those cheesy, romantic 'I love you's to happen, instead all four of them and the bus driver start hysterically screaming. I turn to Max, and she just shrugs. In a weird moment of 'shit what do I do now', I join them. And then they start jumping and hugging me + the screaming. Lovely.

"Wait what made you do it?" Michael asks.

"I just couldn't leave Gus."

Notes

comment 000 if I should end this soon everyone :)

i don't really want to but damn son, that writers block tho

xx
-jupiter yo