The Making Of Us

**Twenty one weeks pregnant**

The past few days I’ve been having some light spotting but that’s happened throughout my pregnancy so I wasn’t too worried about it; yesterday I started getting a little achy in my back and stomach. So I did what my doctor told me to do and drink more water and lie on my left side. It worked for a while but came back finally about eleven clock at night I got out of bed and took a warm bath then fell back asleep and slept pretty much all day. It’s about two thirty in the morning and I have this excruciating pain in my back, I get up to go downstairs not waking Niall; I don’t want him to worry if it’s nothing. I get down to the kitchen practically crawling the rest of the way

“Cassie is that you?” I hear a voice say

“Harry? Thank god please can you help me to the chair I need to sit” I say

“Yea love sure what’s wrong” Harry asks me

“My back..My back is killing me and my stomach is cramping like a mother fucker” I say as tears roll down my face

“Here love sit down for a minute and catch your breath” Harry says

I got to sit down and I can’t it puts too much pressure on my back, it was then that I felt a warm gush go down my legs

“What the fuck” Harry shouts

“ERM Harry? I think my water just fucking broke” I shout but not too loud

“What the fuck Cassie.. What do we do? You’re not even ready to have the babies yet.” Harry says freaking out

“Liam!! Go get Liam, or Louis or Zayn just don’t wake up Niall yet”

Harry leaves to hurry upstairs, Taylor isn’t here she flew back to the states for a week to be with her mom. I hear hurried feet coming down stairs into the kitchen.

“Jesus Harry I said wake one of them not fucking all three of them.” I say irritated

“What happened love?” Liam and Zayn asked

“Uh guys there’s a puddle on the floor. I think more than likely her water broke” Louis says
“Shit! Cassie you need to go to the hospital now” Zayn says

I get up and can’t stand upright so I grab the counter just as an unbearable amount of pain surges through my stomach and around to my back. I almost fall to the floor but Harry and Louis catch me and get me balanced again.

“OWWW CASSIE YOU’RE BREAKING MY HAND LOVE” Louis shouts

“FUCKKKKKKKK” I cry out tears rolling down my face

“Cassie you’re bleeding…. Bleeding bad” Liam says

“What are you talking about mate” Harry says turning around

“Oh my fucking god! Lou help me get her to the car now! Liam grab a towel for her to sit on and Zayn go wake up Niall. Lou and I will drive her to the hospital, you guys meet us there” Harry shouts.

“Here mate let me lie this down in the front seat for you” Liam says

“NO BACKSEAT” I shout

“Ok love anything you say, here” says Liam

Harry and Louis help to get me in the back seat. By this time I can barely move the pain in coming in waves it seems like every other second. Nothing is making it better, Louis sits in the back with me trying to rub circles in my back. It still isn’t helping, but this time I am totally hysterical and hyperventilating, squeezing the life out of poor Lou’s hand.
Liam runs back into the house and up the stairs to Niall’s room; I can hear Zayn

Niall’s POV:

“Niall mate wake up! Something is wrong with Cassie. Harry and Lou just left with her to go to the hospital, C’mon dude wake up” Zayn is shouting

“You’re not funny mate. Go back to bed and leave me alone” Niall says half asleep

“NIALL WAKE THE FUCK UP. LOUIS AND HARRY JUST LEFT WITH CASSIE TO HEAD TOWARDS THE HOSPITAL. WE THINK HER WATER BROKE AND SHE IS BLEEDING… IT’S BAD BRO WAKE THE FUCK UP AND GET DRESSED” Liam yells at him

Zayn goes to the closet and grabs a small overnight bag and puts some clean clothes in there for Cassie. He goes to the bathroom and grabs her brush, toothbrush, toothpaste, deodorant and shoves the whole bag of pads in there as well.

“What else should I put in this bag” Zayn asks

Liam reads off a list as Zayn checks what he has. Niall in a panic just throws on a pair of pajama pants and t-shirt. He is too distraught to drive so Liam grabs the keys to his car as they make their way downstairs. Zayn, Niall and Liam all pile into Liam’s Mercedes Benz and make their way to the hospital; Once they arrive they go into Maternity ward entrance.

“Cassandra McGavin please” Zayn asks the clerk

“Floor three room 345” she says

We make our way to the elevator and up to the third floor which is labeled Labor and Delivery.

“What the fuck is going on? Why is she on the labor and delivery floor?” I ask

“AHHH FUCK…. WHERE IS NIALL?” I hear Cassie yelling

“Right here baby. I’m here, I’m right here” I say hurrying to her side

“What has the doctor said” I asked

“They are taking her straight to ultrasound in just a minute” Louis says to me

The nurse comes back in and wheels Cassie and her bed out the door. I follow behind them not wanting to leave her alone. She needs me right now more than ever. Something is wrong and we are going to find out what the hell is happening. The nurse finishes the ultrasound and goes to get the doctor. I am worried because when doing the part where you track the heart rate I heard nothing and saw nothing on the screen.

I know in the pit of my stomach that our babies are gone, I just know it. I’m waiting for the doctor to confirm what my gut is already telling me. I know it will tear me apart but I’m more concerned about Cassie. I don’t know if I will be able to handle Cassie, but I know I’m going to have to be there for her full heartedly and I know the boys will be here for the both of us as well. The door handles moves and in walks in Doctor Glass

“Cassandra, we are moving you down to pre surgery right now. I am sorry to inform you that you are in the middle of a double miscarriage and we are going to have to do a Cesarean to get the babies out. You are losing a massive amount of blood and it needs to be addressed immediately.” Doctor Glass explains

I knew it, I knew this was happening. I drop to my knees crying out loud with Cassie’s hand still in mine, I stand back up and embrace her as she wails out in pain both physically and emotionally. The doctor is telling us that she needs to go right now so I kiss her and tell her I’ll be waiting when she gets out. I take a moment and go to the restroom where I lose all control of my emotions.

“Why the fuck is this happening? Why?” I shout

I hit the wall a few times before dropping to the floor with my knees to my chest, bellowing at the top of my lungs. Not giving a shit who hears it.

*knock knock knock*

“Erm just a moment please” I say

“Niall? Mate is that you?” I hear a voice say

I get up off the floor and wash my hands throwing some water on my face trying to compose myself a little bit before opening the door.

“Mate what’s happened?” Harry asks a look of great concern on his face

“Cassie…the babies…. She’s…Surgery” was all I could spit out between sobs.

Harry grabs me into a strong embrace as I fall into his grip, I cry loudly into his shoulder for a few minutes before composing myself again and explain to him what was happening. We go back out to the waiting room and Harry explains to the others what’s happened, we gather our belongings and go downstairs to the operating waiting room.

I take that time to call my mum and dad and to give Jay and Tessa a call as well. They give their deepest sympathies and tell me to have Cassie call them as soon as she feels able to do so. They are very upset but there isn’t a thing they can do about any of this they are in the states and we are here in England. By the time I get off the phone the nurse comes in to tell us that Cassie is in recovery.

“First I need to know that it’s OK to speak to you in front of all these other people” she says

“Yes that’s not a problem we all live in the same house” I say

“Ok, Mr. Horan we tried our very best to save the babies but it just wasn’t possible with them being only 22 weeks gestation. They were very tiny weighing just 1lb 0.52oz. We can hold them in a freezer in the morgue until you and Cassandra make a decision on how you wish to dispose of them. As for Cassandra she lost a fair amount of blood, which required us to give her two pints of blood. We also had to scrape out the remains of tissue that was left in her uterus. She will most definitely have some scarring but it won’t stop her from being able to conceive again.” She explains

“I’m confused on why this even happened in the first place” I spit out

“Well sir we are going to further investigate the placenta, there were a number of blood clots in it. That could be a possible reason. Also she had what we call Placenta Previa where the placenta started detaching itself from the wall of the uterus, resulting in the loss of nutrients and adequate blood supply and oxygen to the babies.” She explains once again

I hear some sniffling behind me and I know that the rest of the boys are heartbroken just as much as I am. They were all so excited to become uncles. It’s going to take some time for all of us to get through this and the worst part is… Taylor isn’t here for Cassie, I don’t think Lou has even called her yet. She’ll be torn but I’m most worried about my fiancée, after the doctor gets done explaining everything to us she takes me back to see my love.

“Ni” she says her voice cracking, tears welling in her eyes

“Yea baby” I answer

“They’re gone…. They’re really gone, I’m not pregnant anymore. We won’t get to see them Niall” she says sobbing

“Baby calm down, the nurse explained to me that they are keeping them in a freezer in the morgue until we can figure out funeral arrangements. But that can wait until tomorrow, or even the next day. Baby I’m so sorry you had to endure all that. Nothing in the world will ever hurt me more than seeing how much pain you were and still are in.” I say to her

Notes

Sorry guys please don't hate me... i promise things will get better for Niall and Cassie XOXO love you all keep reading and commenting i really love reading what you have to say :)