The car ride was smooth and quite. Katie was asleep and Niall was focused on the road. Katie had some hidden secrets that noone knew. She was constantly feeling anxious, and scared after her trumatic experience with the miscarriage and at such a young age. She is yet to find the courage to tell anyone about the way she is feeling. How could she.
"kitkat were at the services." Niall said lightly waking katie up.
She stretched her arms out and took off her seat belt. Niall opened the door and helped her out. "babe get on my back ur still really tired." he said kissing her soft lips.
She got on his back and kissed his cheek. They walked over to where the others were parked and then they walked into the services. They all went to Costa and got food and drinks. Katie, ele and Dee went to the toilet. "Niall you alright you seem really distant." Liam said really really concerned.
"umm yeah. Just concerned about katie. She's not taking this to well." Niall said after taking a sip off his hot drink.
The girls came back. They were in the services for a little while about an hour.katie was ever so quite the whole time. She just ate and drank. Something was not right. "babe can we get going again. Please." katie said kinda blunt but with puppy dog eyes. "yeah okay. Guys we gonna head on the road again."Niall said getting up and placing his and hers rubbish in the bin.
"alright mate we gonna set off in a minute just finishing up here.see u at ours." Louis said.
Niall nooded.
They got back into the car. Katie was a little happier but still very very scared to say anything.
"ummm babe I need to tell you something. But but its really hard to say. I've been keeping this in for a long time." katie said looking at niall's perfect face whilst he was concentrating on the motorway.
"go ahead." he said.
Katie was about to speak when her phone rang. It was her mum.
Katie couldn't tell Niall now. The moment had gone.
"babe what did you want to say." Niall said looking at katie staring out off the window.
"don't worry I will tell you when the timings right." as she said that he placed his hand on her leg. She jumped a little bit but remembered that it was Niall so she just put a smile on her face.
The rest off the journey was quite and a little awkward. Katie just slept most off the time. When they arrived back at the apartment he placed katie in the bedroom as she was still asleep. Niall went to the roof. He was just staring.
(Liam). Niall.
Mate you alright.
Yeah I'm fine its its just katie. She she is not taking this as well as I expected.
Ohh it may just be a reaction. It will be alright.
Yeah but when we were in the car she was just staring out off the window and I put my hand on her thigh and she jumped. She's never done that before. She said that she wanted to tell me something but she couldn't cause her mum rang then she didn't tell me after.she won't tell me anything.
Mate don't worry she will tell you when she feels she needs to. It will all be fine. Just don't cry mate u know we all hate to see you crying. Promise.
Alright I'm gonna go and check on her. All she's done is sleep.
As Niall walked into their room he saw she wasn't in the bed. He walked into the walkin wardrobe. She was stood there in her underwear just staring in the mirror and crying.
"babe what are you doing." he said as he walked up behind her and placing his arms around her.
She just got out off his grip and walked to the bathroom and locked the door.
"just don't touch me Niall I know what you think off me. I'm some tart that sleeps around and has no confidence." she shouted breaking down. Niall tried the door to see if she locked it. She didn't. She was sat on the floor rocking and crying. He went to her straight away. He took off his hoodie and wrapped it around her. She was freezing. She was crying hystericaly.
"I I I don't know if I can be me anymore. This has taken the last bit off fight out off me." she said.
"don't you dare talk like that kitkat.we need to get you some help. Your not right. There's only so much that you can keep in. You have to talk.I'm always all ears for you. You just have to tell me and I will try and help the best I can. Do you want me to ring ur mum and say we won't go over for tea." he said wipping the tears away from her pale face and calming her down slowly.
"nnnnnnnn no it will be alright we will go. I just feel soo down all the time. I think I need some help. Thank you nia. " she said. Completely calm. "I'm sorry I have put you through a lot. I love you."
"Its alright. I love you too. Let's get you dressed yeah."
She nodded her head. Niall picked out a pair off jeans, a floaty top and one off his hoodies. She loved wearing his hoodies.
"tomorrow morning I will ring up and get you someone to speak to yeah." he said.
"thank you Niall.I don't know what I would do with out you."
"I think its about time to leave for your mum and dads. You ready georgous." he said lifting her up which made her laugh. She looked a little red but it soon went. She kissed nialls lips. they went into the front room. He placed katie on the sofa and headed for the roof.
"guys its time to go. Liam can I have a word later on."
Yeah that's fine mate. Just say when.
They all drove to katies mum and dads and they had tea no one really spoke about this weekend. Katie was all happy and smiling but it was just an act. Niall knew everything now. You could see he was very worried about her. It was about 10 before they left her parents house.
They got back to the apartment and katie made a hot drink for everyone.
"Liam can I talk to you please."
Sure mate.
They walked to the roof and sat on the chairs.
What's up mate.
I don't think I can do this appereance tomorrow.
Why.
Its katie. She had like a breakdown before we left for her mums and dads. When I went to check on her she wasn't in bed so I went to the wardrobe. She was stood looking by the mirror just staring at herself. When I went to hug her she just ran to the bathroom and said not to touch her. I went to the bathroom and she was on the floor in a ball crying and rocking. I'm soo scared mate she was on about how she can't take this anymore. She really scared me. Tomorrow morning I'm calling up to get her some help. But too be honest I don't know what to do. I think she may need a counciler. But how am I supposed to do an apperance when all my mind is thinking about is her.
We will sort it mate. I will have a word with Paul. He will understand we will just say that katie has a doctors appointment and needs you to go with her. We will sort something out don't worry we will get it sorted. Just take care off her. She needs you. If there is anything u need let me know alright. She looked like she was fine at her parents.
Yeah I know. She said that she does it quite a lot. I don't know what I'm supposed ToDo. I want to come with u and the lads cause I will be letting the fans down but then if I go I will be letting down the one person that I love and who needs me.
Don't worry stay with her and help her. She needs you.just leave it to Liam.
Thanks.
When we walked back in katie wasn't there. Lauren said that she was going to bed. He had to some how tell the other lads that he wouldn't be going with them tomoz. The girls were in the game room watching TV. He seazed the opertunity and took it.
"umm lads. I'm not gonna be able to make the apperance tomorrow. Katie hasn't took the news off the miscarriage too well. She's bad. I need to be with her." he just broke down in tears.
The boys knew that when Niall cry's its bad. Its as bad as it possibly could be.
"its alright Niall just do what you gotta do." Louis said majorly concerned.
" that's the thing. I don't know what I'm supposed to do. She broke down earlier. She said she doesn't know if she can cope anymore. I feel useless. She admitted that all off her bright clothes is a cover she's really insecure.I'm gonna get her some help. She's just soo down." he tried to say without breaking down again.
The lads could see how bad it was just by nialls reaction.
"do what you have gotta do." zayn said.
"do you want me to ring Paul." Liam said.
"yeah. Its bests to know now than tomorrow morning."
Liam rang Paul and came back.
"I told him he says that's alright and take as long as you need off. he's coming down in the morning so might see u before we leave. It will be alright mate." Liam said.
"I don't even know how I'm gonna ring up to get some help. Who do you even ring."
"ummm my cousin lives in Exeter and is a counciler do you want me to give her a ring." Harry said.
"that would be amazing mate thank you."
"I'm sure she would come here if u needed her to."
"no its alright we can go to her. It will be better if we get out off here so she doesn't associate it with here."
Harry went and gave his cousin a ring and came back and said.
"your in luck she has two sessions free tomorrow one after another. She said you can have them. the first is at 11."
"thanks mate. You are all really good to me you don't know how much this means.thank you."
"go and get some sleep. You need the strength for her." zayn said pushing Niall towards the bedroom.
"thanks again. See you in the morning."
Niall walked into the bedroom. He got changed into his pjs and went and got into bed. Katie was still awake.
"I'm not going to the apperance tomorrow. You need me here. Harry's cousin has got two free sessions tomorrow. It starts at 11 so we can go. I will fit the bill. Paul said that I can take as much time as I want off to help you. We will be alright. We will help you get through this."
"thank you babe. Can I have a cuddle." she said turning around to face him.
"you don't need to ask. Come here."
She moved closer to him and cuddled and feel asleep.
They woke up at about 9.
Lauren went to collage and told Jim that katie had rupptured a muscle and tissue in her stomach over the weekend and won't be in today as she has a hospital oppointment.
They walked out off the bedroom and the boys were sat in the front room.
"morning. You both alright." liam said coming over to the kitchen.
"yeah I'm okay just a little down." katie said.
"its alright. Is Paul on his way." Niall said trying to reasure her.
"babe do you want some breakfast." katie said changing the subject.
"umm yeas please. I'll have what your having."
"yeah pauls on his way. Katie you know how much you love us all." Louis started to say.
"let me guess you want me to cook you breakfast."
"haha yes please." Harry and the rest off the boys said.
She cooked them breakfast and once she was done she sat down with them with her breakfast.
It was silent. Katie went and got dressed. She had on a light coloured Jean a skin colour and black stripped blouse and her leather jacket. Niall did not realise that she had heels on. She was back to her old self covering everything up and being confident.
They had to prepare for any possible press attention that they would get. No one even katie knew how she would react to any media attention. She could take it on the chin or it could really badly affect her. Noone knew.