Stupid Fanfiction moments.
Twilight Fanfiction.
Twilight... Fanfics.....MY EYES MY EYES! THEY BURN!!!!!(Like those vampires should have been doing in the sunlight.)
Okay, for your amusement and well because I am a whore to social media attention. I went to what seems to be the darkest place on the internet since two girls one cup.
I only read descriptions. This content is not for younger viewers. What you are about to read can cause: gagging, ziesuring, drop in iq, wants to kill self. You have been warned.
"Bella never understood why her brother Edward has always been so dark and overprotective of her. He was constantly running away from his most darkest secrets, and she'd always been there to save him. But when Edward finally loses control, Bella is introduced to his innermost forbidden desires: He wants her. How can she hold onto her sanity"
The real question here is how are YOU not in a mental institution. Because that is seriously fucked up, and making me question my sanity.
"Bella is cursed. Since a disease swept through the Earth, millions of people have been left cursed. Edward is the head of the detainment center. He captures, tortures, and sometimes kills the cursed. What happens when Bella and Edward meet?"
First thought was. A disease is NOT a curse. A disease is a F*CKING DISEASE! Second. "What happens When Edward and Bella finally meets?" *Quietly chants* kill her. Kill her. KILL her. KILL HER!
"What if Bella decided not to save Edward. What if she listened to Jake. What if she decided to tell Jake the truth."
First off ever heard of this thing you put at the end of a question? I will give you a hint, they AREN'T called decimalpoints. Second. The answer all of the questions you just asked. *puts on glasses.**clears throat* ignorance and apathy. Aka I don't know, and I don't give a f*ck!
"Bella isn't human. she hates edward but is friends with the Cullen's. after graduating she moves in to Volterra with her genius cousin and finds love within the walls of Volturi. Oh and Edward is fucked up - (Minor swearing)"
Wow Edward is fucked up (minor swaering.) wow. Thank you soooooo much for that VERY needed heads up.
"Okay... will you be my boyfriend?" I asked, biting my lip. He grinned the biggest grin anyone has every seen and kissed me. It was sweet and simple but made me go weak at the knees and made my heart swell. I couldn't believe what had just happened."
The grin thing is making me imagine Edward with a chesire cat grin and for the love of god someone get photoshopping on that.
"As if Edward's departure wasn't enough to break Bella, just as she was piecing herself back together Jake rejected her in the form of getting a girlfriend and abandoning their friendship. The unlikeliest of friends make a bond, a connection, one that is far beyond Bella's complete understanding. Paul stands by her side in a way that she's never had."
Okay first of this girl can apparently just not do ANYTHING on her own. also "stands by her side I a way she's never had" what did this guy do to her when he stood beside her? Had sex? Had her back? Had cookies? Had aids? Had pregnancy? Soo many possibilities!!!
a/N: okay I will go try and kill my self because that was painful.
@somethingsimple
well, first off I am sorry you feel that way. And I will agree with you on some point, yes I do write like an eight year old, however if your niece has a vocabulary like mine I would be both proud and with all my swearing a bit disturbed. I did not say you could not be pleasent to be around on your period, I said that I was not, and I am not teaching young girls that all cases are like that, but I wanted to point out the flaw in most writing which is making it seem like something nice and cute, which is not my experince. (As I think I noted but I honestly do not remember.)
I do understand putting work into your writing because I do write proper fanfictions myself, obviously not on here because that would be hypocritical. And I do not state that here because this is meant to talk shit and mock bad fanfictions, but I do admire writers. However, I admire writer the same way I admire country music; if you are writing honestly and putting effort into it, and do things that are original and your own style. Then fantastic! Well done you! What I am shitting on is the constant copy pasting of the same 10 storylines and people reusing plot lines or just being plain bad. So yes it can be a peak into someones mind, and those stories I do applaud (I did want a moment of silence for well written original fanfictions.)
You say that you dont understand why I would want to put other people down. I am not putting anyone down, if you read through will see even if I use examples I never say who it is, because I do not want to hurt anyone specifically, but I do wanna mock anyone things about stories that have become so stereotypical and unoriginal to read. I mock things and trends that pop up in a lot of fanfics or imagines, because I actually think that they should change. But my intention is not to hurt anyone specifically, I wanna make people laugh or maybe be like, oh I do that in my writing. Hell sometimes it even made me rethink a few plot points because I found out that it was super stereotypical.
Also, you clearly did not read the discription for this story because it clearly states not to read if you get offended easily.
Lastly I would like to answer your last phrases, yes I am a pathetic person who use humor as a defense mechanisme, but if you have a political correct stick so far up your ass that you can not take that someone is mocking stereotypes about fanfiction, then honestly you are truely pathetic as well.
Also I have a quite nice life actually and almost all of these have been written at 1am because I am bored.
ps. you said my writing is really offensive, which parts? Because if there is something that is actually offensive to someone i am willing to take it down.
pps. I am not from an english speaking country which also could explain why some things if they are offensive to you might not seem offensive in my culture.
ppps. If you think american fuckfaces are offensive, then sorry, I did like US however I dont think you can make rational decisions after electing the orange real life king Jeoffery. (I am obviously kidding.) And that was a stupid chapter where I mocked americans for insisting on calling their sport for football when the real one was invented in england centuries before america even existed.
6/9/17