Catching Red Eyes

I took another breath and closed my eyes. I wrapped my arms around me, welcoming the cooler air in the mountains over the heat of the city. I opened my eyes and looked up. The leaves were rustling in the wind and I wondered what it would be like to be able to grow as old as a tree. What things have these trees seen? They were lucky. They didn’t have hearts that could be broken. My mind shifted to Harry but I pushed it away. I wasn’t ready to open that right now.

I walked down off the huge porch and walked out into the forest. I wandered down the path that lead to a small lake behind the house. I stood and watched the small waves crash onto the surface. I wandered around the lake and turned to reach out and touch the closet tree. I was instantly blinded by the shiny object on my left hand that was catching the sunlight. My heart sunk and my stomach clenched. My ring.

With shaking hands, I slide it off my ring finger and brought it up to my face. I held it up as it caught the sunlight again. I turned around when I heard Laurie came up behind me.

“God, I can’t believe any of this, Row…I am so damn sorry,” she said, wrapping her arms around me. I leaned on her as we both looked at the ring.

“This…this was his promise to me…his promise…”

With all the strength I could muster, I threw the ring into the small lake. I felt nothing as it sank to the bottom.

“Good for you, Row.”

I looked at her and tried to muster a smile but nothing surfaced. I turned and looked back at the lake. I promised to leave all my heartache here. I knew it would take longer than a few days to heal, but this was the start.

We sat down on the fresh earth and didn’t say anything. The sun was steadily moving lower into the sky as we continued to sit and take in the view.

“Hey, Row…”

I turned and looked at her.

“Do you think…you’ll ever talk to him again…you don’t have to answer it. I’m just worried about you…”

I let out a sigh and looked up. “I can’t answer that right now. Who knows? I don’t even really know what is going on…this feels like hell. Like, I died and went to hell. I never thought something could physically hurt as much as it emotionally hurts…I feel like someone is repeatedly smacking me across the face…”

I stopped. I couldn’t continue. It was impossible to put my pain into words for her. I brought my knees up to my chest as I felt it get tight again. I opened my mouth to let in as much air as possible. Laurie rubbed my back as I closed my eyes and concentrated on breathing.
After catching my breath, we went back up to the house. Laurie started dinner as I sat back on the couch. I watched the sun disappear behind the trees and mountains.

“Row, are you hungry?”

I shook my head. I was afraid to eat anything with the sick feeling in my stomach still.

“Ok, how about some tea?”

I nodded and waited for the tea. Laurie brought me the hot mug and I took a sip. It warmed me as I felt it slide down my throat. I got up and wandered back onto the porch and Laurie followed me with a few blankets. I sat down on the soft outside chairs and watched as Laurie flipped a switch and the outside fire place came to life. I watched the flames move back and forth behind the screen as I drank my tea. Laurie wrapped her arm around my shoulders as I leaned into her.

The flames were therapeutic as my eyes got heavy. I let my eyes fall as sleep took over me.
I woke with a start as I heard tree branches cracking around us. Laurie was instantly awake too as we both were staring into the darkness. “Shit, let’s go inside. We aren’t in New York anymore.”

We grabbed the blankets and switched off the fireplace as we heard the branch snapping getting closer. We hustled inside and quickly shut the door behind us and went into the kitchen.

“I can say I have never fallen asleep out there before but I can also say I am not surprised at all that we attracted animals. I am sure they heard the fire going and-“

Her words got cut off by a tapping from somewhere outside the house. We both froze and looked at each other. On the plus side, I felt human again even if the emotion was straight fear for my life. It was reminder that I was still alive as my pulse quickened.

“Laurie? What…is…that…?”

She shook her head as we heard the knocking at the back door. We looked at each other and I waved her to go look. She groaned and pulled me with her.

“Wait, maybe we should call Marsh?” I said.

“No reception and there’s not a land line in the guest house.”

“Oh my God, Laurie, I swear if I die because it’s a murderer, you have to explain it to my parents. And Marc and George.”

“Jeez, this is the most you’ve spoken to me since everything. Maybe the fear of death rattled you.”

Before I could respond, the knocking came again. We were both now, very slowly, walking towards the noise.

“Holy. Fuck.”

My jaw dropped at the sight of who was on the other side of the glass. I couldn’t mistake those green eyes anywhere.

Notes