Niall POV

The funeral was the worst thing I’ve ever been to, but it was beautiful indeed. I wasn’t crying, everyone was crying but I wasn’t.

I don’t think it hit me she was gone yet, I was sure when I got home she would hand me a cup of tea and a kiss. Then we would play with Rosalie, until she had to sleep.

I would then lay with Rose, cuddle her until she fell asleep in my arm, knowing how grateful I was that I was going to wake up to my two princesses.

I had avoided any social media since her death, Liam told me #Staystrong1D was trending. We really had the best fans I was just sorry I couldn’t get myself to log on.

Liam was at my side, holding me. I tried to comfort him but I didn’t know what to say nor do. My pal looked so torn up.

Harry was holding Emily, I’ve never seen a girl so broken before. Her makeup was smeared as she clung to Harry.

Matthew was there too, he glared at me through the whole thing. I didn’t blame him, I blamed myself too.
The other boys were there too, trying to comfort their girlfriends. Perrie took it a lot worse than Eleanor, but again she was closer to her.

I had begged my mum to take of Rosalie while I was here, for a small week. I needed my thoughts to get clear before I started to take care of our daughter again.

I know my mum wanted to be here, she really cherished Rose. Everyone did. I don’t think she knew how loved she was. Her parents even came, I contacted them. They were so happy that I had contacted them thinking it was Rose, I had to hear her mum break down when I told her Rose had committed suicide but she had left a beautiful granddaughter that would love to be a part of their life.

I looked around trying to make sense of everything, I couldn’t. I didn’t even want to sing and I always wanted to sing.

I get snapped out of my thoughts when I hear Emily yell, ‘’No rose!’’ As she almost leaps in front of the coffin but gets retrained by Harry.

I look at where her pained expression is lingering at, the coffin is getting lowered into the grave.
That’s when it hits me, I wouldn’t be able to see her again. She was going to be alone in the dirt and I couldn’t do anything about it.

The priest begins, saying "We therefore commit Rose Everlong’s body to the ground;’’ I look painfully as my love gets lowered into the ground not knowing how to cope. ‘’ earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust; in the sure and certain hope of the Resurrection to eternal life." The priest continues.

I was about to stop him but Liam gets a hold of my arm shaking his head, I looked him in the eyes he looked as hurt and confused as me, but had to stay strong for me.

‘’Liam she’s going to get cold down there and get lonely.’’ I mutter, looking up at Liam in complete denial. Some of the other guest looks at me with so much sympathy it makes me sick.

‘’Niall, she’s going to be okay.’’ Liam whispers, like he was trying to convince himself more than me.
I stand there for who knows how long everyone had left except for Liam, Emily, Perrie and me. I just stare blankly at the grave waiting to dig down and pull her up.

I look up seeing Emily getting pulled away from Perrie, I think they were heading home. Which left me with Liam.

‘’It’s my fault. ’I mutter looking at my feet, ‘’ no we all should have seen it come but we didn’t. It’s not your fault.’’ I stay quiet, wanting to believe but something in me refused.

‘’I’ll give you some time.’’ Liam pats my shoulder leaving me behind.
‘’Rose, why did you have to leave?’’ I ask out in the blue not taking my eyes from the grave, ‘’we needed you here.’’

I place a red rose gently on her grave, watching it get tainted by the mutt. Actually that was what Rose was, a tainted Rose. So beautiful yet so scarred.


I don’t want to leave her so I keep hanging, even when it begins to rain I refuse to go. I could already hear her scolding me for staying in the rain.

I finally force myself to leave the grave jumping in my car.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~~

I lock myself into the small flat, it seemed somehow cold. I could smell her scent everywhere.
I could even see her everywhere, I sit down on our bed not knowing where to go from here

I look coldly around the place, why haven’t she left a note? She would wouldn’t she, she couldn’t have forgotten that! She wouldn’t be that selfish.

I yell out in the apartment in frustration throwing the lamp into the wall.
‘’I hate you for leaving me here!’’ I yell out with tears in my eyes when something hits me
.
I quickly run over to the desk where I had first left a note for Rose when we had first met, I throw all the rubbish of it searching for it when I find it.

Her letter for me.
She haven’t forgotten me at all, I sit down reading it as tears stain it.

I could have done so many things different, I put the letter away. Staring at the wall crying silently.

When a collide of memories hit me, both making me cry hard and smile between my sobs.

The good ones.



The bad ones.



How she was feisty and always out up a fight.

How she was so cheeky that it almost was hurting me.

Her face was hauting me, it was like everywhere i turned i would see her about to greet me

When I think about it, I hate myself for not noticing. I could see now the signs how she had changed so much these past months, it was only a matter of time before this would have happened.
I didn’t know how to go on without her but I had to for the sake of Rosalie, I needed to stay strong.

Emily’s POV

Niall haven’t cried at the beginning of the funeral but everyone that looked could see it wasn’t the usual happy guy, the boy that was standing at the grave was nothing less than a broken man. A broken shell.

I knew this would happen, it almost happened years ago so why wouldn’t she do it again?
Only this time she succeed, I just don’t get how she could leave us all behind. Didn’t she get how awful the world already were with her? Without her it was just as it became worse.


She had been my best for as long as I could remember, she moved to London because of me. Maybe if I haven’t taken her to that club where she met Niall then maybe she would have been alive?

No, I shouldn’t blame Niall this would have happened no matter what. Maybe this was just a lot sooner than I had expected.

I knew the day I went out with Rosalie and Niall that I should have stayed something in her eyes screamed for me but I just shook it off. It was my mistake.

I wish I could rewind and do it all over again, save Rose from herself.

I wonder how Niall is coping with everything right now. He was alone in the flat they both shared, I couldn’t even imagine going back there yet.

I hope he did better than me, Rosalie needed her dad right now. She was going to grow up without her mother, and I just couldn’t deal with that thought. My heart broke every time I thought about it.

I glance at a picture on my night stand of me and Rose.

All the memories comes overwhelming me, as I break down in deep sobs. Hugging the teddy she had given me for my 15th birthday.







I had grown up with this girl and that was what I was used to. Now I had no idea how to grow old without her.
She was my guidance in my every need, she always helped me.

I wanted to hide from the world and never come back, everyone was having a hard time.
Even Harry he blamed himself for taking Niall to those parties. Everyone had no idea to cope with it.
Matthew refused to speak to me, he thought it was Niall and I fault that this happened. I don’t blame him.

Niall POV

2 weeks later.

It been two weeks and it felt like my day was in a motion film. My light of the day was when Rosalie would flash her smile at me.

I sat with her in the living room playing, looking at pictures with her when she smacked a picture of Rose. ‘’Mama!’’ She exclaimed proudly pointing at Rose’s smiling face. I stared at the pictures for several seconds before I finally nodded.

‘’Yes, that’s mama.’’ I turn her around studying my baby girls face, ‘’ and mama loves you always!’’ I smile tickling her.

We get interrupted by Liam that makes a face to Rosalie causing her to giggle before she turns her attention to her doll.

‘’You should move, Niall.’’ He says bluntly looking around the flat.
‘’I know.’’ I mutter back.

‘’Why won’t you?’’ He ask, looking directly at me.

‘’It feels like I’m leaving her if I do, she needs a home to come home to.’’ Suddenly I realize what I just said when I meet Liam’s sympathy gaze.

‘’This is all I have of her now.’’ I simply state as a fact.

‘’You also have her.’’ He smiles weakly pointing at Rosalie that was making gurgling noises.

Notes

Heyooo! There's going to be two more chapters you could say. One your getting next time, and one that's going to be Rose's letter to Niall.
There's also going to be a Epilogue!

So look out for that.

Your comments makes me really happy!<3