Roses and Thorns
Any Word. (41st Chapter)
…At Night (Back At the Hotel)…
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Janelle's POV:
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“(He coos) Shhh, come on love. At least tell me what happened?” I cling into Louis’s shirt more, crying out my feelings like a lost child. He pats my hair softly, as it rests on his chest. Louis spotted me coming back to the hotel, and since the afternoon; he has been here comforting me and trying to calm my crying agony. “Oh, Jan… will you at least say a word to me? Come on just any word…” Louis’s concerned begs, makes my weeping slow down a notch.
I lift my head slowly from his chest, and he hands me a clean tissue. The entire mattress turned to a see of white paper, endless tissues carrying a heavy amount of tears. Tears of several emotions and disappointments. I’m worried about Harry, since I don’t know what has happened since Zayn abused his jaw physically. Zayn… what can I say about him now? All the paintings of him in my mind are shredded with a chainsaw.
I never knew that you could be hurt and disappointed at the same time, but my current situation proved it right. It’s my mistake, for believing that he could never harm me on purpose, it’s my mistake that I thought he trusted me just like I did. He slept with my god damn sister for crying out loud, and knocked her up. Did I tell him I was hurt? No. Did I mention that I hate him and I don’t trust him?
No. Did I stop loving him back then? No. Did I stop loving him after today’s situation? As crazy as it may sound… no I didn’t. I can’t stop loving him, and it scares me more than he did today. He reflected this beast that I never knew it existed in him; but my heart still pumped love for him. Call me clingy, call me obsessed; because I think that’s what I am.
Louis looks at me, and gives me a tiny smile; needing my calmness more than anything right now. “(My words come out with no emotional expression) Louis, I’m so sorry for ruining your shirt, and wasting your time… I’m stupid, that’s what I am. I shouldn’t have dragged you here with my depression…” He opens his arms and scoops me in them warmly.
“Stop blabbering nonsense. You never dragged me; I did it because you’re a sister to me, Elle. We’ve been friends since God knows when; the least I could do is be with you now. (He huffs a frustrated breath) If only you’d tell me what or who made you cry this much.” I nod slowly in his arms, as I cling mine around him weakly. “(I whisper) It will all be okay soon… just a week and I’ll break free finally.”
Louis drops his arms around me slowly, as he looks at me in a little confusion. “Am I missing something?” I sigh, not caring anymore if it might affect me badly. What has happened is the worse, already; growing pains is not what I intend to harvest in the end. “Promise me that this won’t leave this room?” He nods, as I begin telling him everything from the start. I trust Louis, and I know that he won’t jepordize me or Zayn with blurting the confession out.
Yes he’s the first to know, and hopefully the only one that gets this chance of learning this info. It’s funny how I once thought that this secret is innocent, and it only is one because it protects our love for each other. But now, I care less if anything happens to it. It’s all gone, just like I once wished that everything turned into dust; it is right now.
The heart-shaped love is breaking into microscopic particles, while the wind carries them away from the base till the last piece. I’ll always love him, but it won’t be my priority any longer. The list is cleared, and I need to rearrange it, but somehow I tend to trace his name again on the top of the list… what does this mean?
..........................
Janelle's POV:
..........................
“(He coos) Shhh, come on love. At least tell me what happened?” I cling into Louis’s shirt more, crying out my feelings like a lost child. He pats my hair softly, as it rests on his chest. Louis spotted me coming back to the hotel, and since the afternoon; he has been here comforting me and trying to calm my crying agony. “Oh, Jan… will you at least say a word to me? Come on just any word…” Louis’s concerned begs, makes my weeping slow down a notch.
I lift my head slowly from his chest, and he hands me a clean tissue. The entire mattress turned to a see of white paper, endless tissues carrying a heavy amount of tears. Tears of several emotions and disappointments. I’m worried about Harry, since I don’t know what has happened since Zayn abused his jaw physically. Zayn… what can I say about him now? All the paintings of him in my mind are shredded with a chainsaw.
I never knew that you could be hurt and disappointed at the same time, but my current situation proved it right. It’s my mistake, for believing that he could never harm me on purpose, it’s my mistake that I thought he trusted me just like I did. He slept with my god damn sister for crying out loud, and knocked her up. Did I tell him I was hurt? No. Did I mention that I hate him and I don’t trust him?
No. Did I stop loving him back then? No. Did I stop loving him after today’s situation? As crazy as it may sound… no I didn’t. I can’t stop loving him, and it scares me more than he did today. He reflected this beast that I never knew it existed in him; but my heart still pumped love for him. Call me clingy, call me obsessed; because I think that’s what I am.
Louis looks at me, and gives me a tiny smile; needing my calmness more than anything right now. “(My words come out with no emotional expression) Louis, I’m so sorry for ruining your shirt, and wasting your time… I’m stupid, that’s what I am. I shouldn’t have dragged you here with my depression…” He opens his arms and scoops me in them warmly.
“Stop blabbering nonsense. You never dragged me; I did it because you’re a sister to me, Elle. We’ve been friends since God knows when; the least I could do is be with you now. (He huffs a frustrated breath) If only you’d tell me what or who made you cry this much.” I nod slowly in his arms, as I cling mine around him weakly. “(I whisper) It will all be okay soon… just a week and I’ll break free finally.”
Louis drops his arms around me slowly, as he looks at me in a little confusion. “Am I missing something?” I sigh, not caring anymore if it might affect me badly. What has happened is the worse, already; growing pains is not what I intend to harvest in the end. “Promise me that this won’t leave this room?” He nods, as I begin telling him everything from the start. I trust Louis, and I know that he won’t jepordize me or Zayn with blurting the confession out.
Yes he’s the first to know, and hopefully the only one that gets this chance of learning this info. It’s funny how I once thought that this secret is innocent, and it only is one because it protects our love for each other. But now, I care less if anything happens to it. It’s all gone, just like I once wished that everything turned into dust; it is right now.
The heart-shaped love is breaking into microscopic particles, while the wind carries them away from the base till the last piece. I’ll always love him, but it won’t be my priority any longer. The list is cleared, and I need to rearrange it, but somehow I tend to trace his name again on the top of the list… what does this mean?
Notes
Don't stop now, just:
KEEP READING HONEYS <3 :D xx
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the funny part is that my name is Serenity
In chapter 44
11/22/14