I Understand. An AU/punk story.

Everything in me I had been feeling for the past weeks towards Harry...

it's all on the table.

All of it, every ounce, bubbles over in to one single emotion.

Rage.

The minute those few words escape the lips that have kissed me time and time again. Someone punched me right int he stomach.

"YOU STUPID, BITCH!" I scream and lunge. Not lunge I fucking throw myself on top of him across the circle, everyone jumps back and up as I knock him on to his back. Taking no time in mounting his hips and start slapping his face.

One hand in his curls, pulling the shit out of them, the other batting face. I then continue to assault the one and only Harry Styles.

"Lilian!" He screams underneath me.

But he doesn't fight me back. He doesn't even try. He could have thrown me off with ease but he let me beat the shit out of him.

"WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!" I scream over all of the voices calling my name. But I blur it out.

I throw punch after punch, ripping his hair; and he lets me.

Pain and sadness over his features as he lets me scream inhumane curses and words of hate.

But my rage starts to diminish and it's replaced with something else..

My whole body starts shaking and my eyes start watering.

His hands land on my hips, squeezing gently.

"Oh, Lilian. Baby girl.." He hums as a sob releases my lips.

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!" I try to shriek but it only comes out a strangled cry, the salt I swallowed coming out.

"It's OK.." he coos, still on the floor. His face busted to shit as I start to cry a lot harder.

"Don't!" I warn him, my hands stop the assault and end up clutching his shirt. My chest heaves as I cry over him.

Everyone shocked at my insane meltdown.... obviously.


He sits up slowly and his arms wrap around me. Panic bubble sin my stomach.

"Don't touch me.." I strangle and try to get up form his lap but he holds me down. He presses his forehead to mine and whispers sweet things in my ear.

"I'm so sorry, sweet heart. It's OK. We're OK." he hums. I shake my head and shove his shoulders.

"Louis!" I cry out.

I'm not ready for this, for him to touch me. to ask for me back because I'll say yes and I shouldn't.

His face washes over with pain at Louis's names. Large hands grab my hips and start to pull me off of him and to my feet.

Panic is replaced on his face when he realizes what he's looking at.

I'm moving on.

I watch him unevenly as Niall pulls him to his feet, trying to steady him.

"You have some fucking nerve!" Louis yells at Harry, wrapping one arm around me, drawing me in to his chest, his other hand pointed at Harry.

"Lilian we need to talk!" Harry slurs, his lips split, his eyes huge and worried.

"LIKE FUCKING HELL!" Louis screams, holding me even tired. My heart pounds and I look away from Harry, not wanting to fall for it.

He never wanted you

He never will

I swallow the tears and bury my face in his chest.

"Time to go, Hazza." Niall says quietly, half dragging him around us.

"Lilian, I'm so sorry! Please just listen to me!:" Harry pleads once he's standing directly behind us and right in front of the couch. I turn to take a peak at him, once his eyes meet mine he says it... "LILIAN I LOVE YOU!''

Everyone freezes.

I walk out of Louis's grip.

"What did you just say to me?" I hiss, my voice low and gravely. The anger all returning.

"I love you and I know you still love me. We need to talk!" He please, shoving Niall's grip off he takes a step forward to me.

"How dare you even say that to me!" I shriek stepping closer, throwing my hands in the air. He takes a step closer, his eyes still wide and panicked , pleading and desperate.

A few more tears fall but I wipe them away.

"You know it's true." he breathes.

And I did.

And I hated him and myself.

And I loved him.

And we all knew it.

"You're fucking sick!" I yell, going at him I give him my hardest shove and he stumbles backwards onto the couch, grabbing my wrist , I give out a yelp as we fall back on to the couch which then continues to then fall backwards with a terribly loud crash as we roll over the back and land on our back on the floor.

a small clinking noise clatters along the floor.

The wind gets knocked out of me while he releases a small groan a little whoosh noise goes through my lips. I choke a little on my air. My head pounding from hitting the floor.
I look up to find my head slightly on his chest, our legs intertwined.

He groans again and I roll on to my stomach, quickly off of him.

Until the diamonds by his head catch my eyes.

The necklace he gave me, sprawled out a few inches in front of me.

"Oh my god!" louis yells , hurrying to me.

Harry studies me closely. I whimper and grab my head, going up in to a sitting position,

"Are you OK?" he breathes, quickly sitting up next to me. Louis comes in front of me, grabs my hands and pulls me up as Zayn rips Harry to his feet.

"You're stupid!" I whimper to Harry, cupping the back of my head.

"I know." He says, making another attempt to come over to me. "Can we please talk now?!"

"No, get the fuck away form her." Louis spits, wrapping his arms around me, pulling me away.

"Lilian, please!" He yells, following me to the door.

"Oh my god are you OK?" Perri runs up to me, grabbing my shoulders. I slap her hands away.

"I know you set this up." I hiss, walking away from the horrific scene that just happened as Louis leads em tot he door. He continues to call for me but I quickly make my way down the hallway. Louis hot on my heels.

God that was fucking awful.

"Lilian!" He calls, coming out in to the hall. I shake my head and Louis is about to turn around but I grab his hand an drag him to the elevator. Making sure the door closes before he reaches it. Not that matters, I know he's in the stairs right now...

As soon as we leave the main apartment building door Harry is already exiting the stair well, breathing hard, still asking me to listen to him.

"I'm going to fucking kill him." Louis snarls so only I hear as we make our way to the car, ignoring Harry completely. I squeeze his hand tighter.

Harry grabs my elbow and pulls me back, Louis spins around and brings a fist back which I quickly step in front of, putting my hands on his chest.

"Wait in the car. This will only take a second." I say softly, smiling up at him.

"No." he snaps, pain in his eyes, not understanding why I would actually want to speak to him.. but I need to.

"Please?" I ask softer, pleading him with my eyes, He huffs, shoots Harry a warning glare before kissing my forehead and getting in the car. With a deep breath I turn and face him.

"You have thirty seconds." I bite, not meeting his eyes.

"I'm sorry!" He pleads, taking a step forward, bending his knees slightly so I'm forced to look at him.

"I know. You told me." I say quietly, wrapping my arms around myself.

"Why can't you forgive me then?"

"You don't deserve a second chance. You broke my heart and I don't trust you. I doubt I ever will again." I breathe, not allowing myself to yell or cry.

I have done too much of that tonight.

"I don't believe this is it for us. I won't let you give up on me." He snaps, finding his voice.

"Harry." Something weird in me clicks from saying his name.

I haven't said his name in weeks....

"I already gave up on you."

And with that I turn and leave him there, getting in Louis's care; letting him drive me to safety.

Notes

YOU GUYS STOP HATING ON HARRY YOU'RE MAKING ME SAD

YOU HAVE TO REALIZE HES JUST SAD AND HEARTBROKEN

HE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO HANDLE IT SO HE LASHES OUT.

HES A SECRET CUPCAKE IN DENIAL!