Harry P.O.V.

“Blair, are you ready to go?” I yell, standing at the bottom of the winding staircase. I wait for her to answer, my patience run out half an hour ago. “Blair, are you ready to go or not? If not I’m leaving without you.”

She descends the staircase, slow and deliberate, as if she is trying to make a good impression on a crowded group below her, to her disappointment it’s just me. “Where has your patience gone, Harry? I told you I would be ready on time, so now let’s go.”

“You would have been on time half an hour ago,” I mumbled as I walked into the kitchen to collect my things.

“Do not mumble, Harry. You know how much I hate it when you do that,” her annoyed voice trailed after me matched to the beat of her heels clicking across the wood.

I turn not attempting to hide my anger at her. “I said, if you were to be on time, then you would have been ready half an hour ago, we’re already running late so can we just stop arguing and go.”

“Fine,” was all she said, before grabbing her handbag and sashaying out the front door. I put my face in my hands, not ready to deal with anything today.

Things had been tense since I had come to America to be with Blair, the timing could not have been worse. Niall had apparently found his way across the border as well. He’s staying with that Elliot guy or something, I heard they met in London years ago and had become close and now Niall was here supporting him as he makes another movie. Blair’s been acting weird, she never wants to be seen out with me, she says it’s just because she’s tired from work and the whole love square thing that I apparently roped her into is weighing on her shoulders. But she’s still out partying every night so maybe I just shouldn’t bother anymore.

I lock the front door and she’s already half way down the street. ‘Fucks sake,’ I mumble to myself before putting my keys in my pocket and running after her. She doesn’t turn when I slow down next to her catching my breath. I sling my arm around her shoulders, she’s still so much shorter than me even with heels on, and I stick my other hand in the pocket of my tight jeans. She doesn’t lean into my like she used to, instead she goes rigid and picks up the pace.

“Harry, it’s too hot to have your arm hanging over me like that,” she says, shrugging her shoulders so my arm falls off down her back. I just stick my other hand in my pocket and stare straight ahead. “So today I want to get some new shoes, maybe another jacket they say it’s going to be getting cold again soon, oh and then I’m thinking of getting my hair done,” she continues without missing a beat.

“I thought today was supposed to be about us, y’know reconnecting and all that? I came to America to be with you, not watch you shop,” I reply, I used to love shopping days with her.

“Well we are doing something together, I’m going to try on clothes and you’re going to tell me that I look stunning in them. And don’t worry, honey, we can get you some new clothes as well. Those ripped jeans and flannel shirt make you look kind of homeless.”

I look over to her, surprised by her acting so cold. “Wow, okay. Um, I don’t actually need any new clothes so you go shopping by yourself and I’m going to go do my own thing,” I walk away from her towards a crowded area of the street.

“But Harry wait, you didn’t leave me any money,” she yells after me.

“Use your own damn money for god’s sake,” I yell over my shoulder, walking quicker out of her sight.

I find a somewhat empty café on a corner street and duck inside, instant memories of the café in London where I found Niall flow into my head, flashing by fast, falling over each other it was hard to see them all. I sighed, ordered my coffee and sat at a table by the window, facing the busy New York street. The waiter brought over my coffee quickly and I sat, staring blankly through the glass, thinking about everything and nothing at once. It was then that I realised how lonely I am.

“Harry?” I knew that voice, so deep, a voice that could lull me to sleep. I had fallen in love with that voice. After some time sitting here I had closed my eyes, no longer wanting to see the happy couples that passed by laughing on the street. And I couldn’t help but welcome the voice that I had missed the most.

“Harry? Are you okay?” Oh there it was again, concerned for me, caring. I could stay in this daydream forever. Stay forever with him. A hand touched my shoulder; I turn my head wanting to be closer to the heat that radiated through me. A sharp pain shot through my right cheek, my eye watering slightly, my eyes snap open startled.

“Harry, what are you doing?” My eyes focus on the figure in front of me, so it wasn’t a daydream. Niall stood before me, blue jeans hanging off his hips, plain white shirt, tattoos trailing down his arms, and beanie hanging off the back of his head. “Harry!” he snapped again.

My head shoots up to look him in the eye. “Niall, what are you doing here? Did you slap me?”

“Well you were scaring the other customers while you were drooling over here, so I thought I better do something,” he laughs. “What were you doing anyway?”

“Oh I was just, ah just thinking about something I’m going to do later,” I finally got out, hoping he didn’t go further into it.

He puts his hands up, palms facing me and taking a step backwards, “oh, wow sorry I asked mate. Didn’t mean to delve into your private life,”

I stood quickly, knocking the table, “No, that’s not what I mean at all, get your mind out of the gutter, Niall.”

“Hey, you said it not me,” he replies, his eyes gleaming with laughter, putting his hands back in his pockets.

“Will you sit down for a minute? Catch up?” I ask, lowering myself back into my chair and gesturing for him to sit opposite me. He looks unsure at first before sliding swiftly into the chair.

“So what are you doing here, Niall?” I ask, just happy to be near him.

“I just came down to get some food,” he said, looking nervously out the window. I just stare at him, letting him know, that I know, that he knows what I mean. “You know that’s not what I mean.”

“I’m staying with Elliot, he has an apartment a few streets over,” he replies, still staring out the window. “Speaking of which I should probably get back we have plans tonight.”

I was already sorry I asked. “Are you guys together?” I surprised myself by being so forward.

He smiles, a sad smile that only touches one side of his lips. A Niall smile. “No, we’re just friends. I mean he’s great, he’s good looking but no, just friends.”

Oh so they were fuck buddies.

I touch his hand with my fingers across the table, “Will you walk with me?”

He just nods slightly.

We leave the café joining the crowd of people on the street, everyone walking, running in different directions. I grab Niall’s arm and lead him across the road where the path isn’t so packed and we can actually hear each other. We walk for a long time, neither of us saying anything. Small drops of water start to fall, causing dark dots to stain the footpath in front of us, before long it becomes heavier and I take off my coat and throw it over our heads to try and keep us dry. We come to a park and sit down on a bench under cover, watching the rain pour down from our own little secluded spot.

“So what brings you to America?” I ask him, the rain had made its way through the bottom of my jeans from us running through puddles to find shelter; it caused shivers to run up my body.

Niall sat with his elbows resting on his knees; my jacket pulled around him the too long sleeves bunching at his wrists, as he looked out across the grassed area. “El asked me to stay with him while he worked. I figured I didn’t have anything better to do, so I came.” He said it in such a way that made it seem as if he couldn’t care less if he came here or stayed in London. It made me curious to find out what his and Elliot’s relationship actually was.

“So you and Elliot, you guy -,” I started.

“Harry why do you want to know so much? Honestly it’s none of your business what I and Elliot are. I told you we are friends, why can’t you just leave it at that?” he asks, angered by my intrusion.

“I’m just looking out for you, protecting you I guess. I still feel like I need to look after you,” it was the truth, kind of.

“Harry, it’s like your body has left the past but your mind is still in it. You haven’t been looking out for me in over four years –“

I interrupt him, “Niall that’s not fair. You left, I couldn’t look after you when I had no idea where you were.”

“I’m not blaming you for anything, Harry. I’m merely just stating a fact. That for four years we were separated and I did just fine without you looking out for me. I’m not a baby, and neither are you. I don’t need someone trying to mother me and you need to grow up and start acting like the man that I know you are,” This Niall was so forward, so direct that it honestly scared me.

I sighed, hanging my head in my hands. “I’m sorry, Niall. I’m not trying to baby you; I’m just trying to be your friend. Mates, remember? We were going to try. And I’ve needed you these last few weeks, things with Blair are getting out of control and I don’t know what to do.” I lift my head from my hands and look at him, he’s already staring at me, but his eyes aren’t the caring blues that I was expecting. They were hard, it looked like he was straining to keep the hardness in them, but I don’t know why.

“Harry, I can’t help you with that. That’s something that you have to figure out with her, and talking to me about it isn’t going to do any good,”

“I can’t, there is nothing I can do because I don’t,” I stopped to gather my thoughts, my head slightly shaking to each side, “I don’t love her.”

“Who do you love?”

“You.”

He stared out in front of him again, his chest rising and falling evenly, like my words had no effect on him. His eyes held steady as he turned to me, the hardness still present, making them look slightly grey.

“No you don’t. I have no doubt that you believe what you’re saying. But you’re wrong. You are in love with the boy you knew four years ago and the person in front of you now is not him. You don’t even know the person you claim to love.” After what I said, he has the nerve to tell me that the way I feel is wrong. How could he possibly know what I’m feeling?

“Yes, I do. I love you, Niall. I don’t know you because you won’t let me; just let me in. I can’t make it work with Blair because I don’t love her. There is no reason to even try to make it work. No point. Just a means to an end,”

“Harry I have to go meet Elliot. I’m sorry,” was all he said, as he stood up from the bench, the water droplets clung to his fringe before falling loose and running down his drying cheeks.

“Can you just wait a second!” I say, more forcefully than I had intended. I stood up so our t-shirts brushed against each other. “Can you just tell me that it’s going to be okay?”

He looked conflicted, like he desperately wanted to say yes, yes everything is going to be fine, but the other part of him looked like he wanted to run away as fast as he could. He didn’t say anything. So I did all I could think to do and leaned down brushing my lips over his. He pulled away almost instantly, causing me to step back.

“Harry, don’t. You and I can’t work,” and that’s all he said before he was trenching across the soggy grass of the park still wearing my jacket and all I did was stand there and watch him go. Again.

~.~

I arrived home a lot later than I had anticipated. I hear Blair running down the stairs, causing them to creak under the pressure.


“Where have you been? I’ve been calling and calling worried sick about you,” she said, coming to stand in front of me, one hand poised on her small hip.


I pull my phone out of my pocket and see there are no missed calls or messages. I raise one eyebrow and look at her, “Worried were you?” I chuck the phone on the couch and start making my way up the stairs.


“Okay so maybe I didn’t call, but I was still worried. I got home hours ago and here you are coming home from god knows where soaking wet and walking mud all through the house,”


“Since when have you cared about this house, Blair?” I ask, still ascending the stairs.


“Well I don’t, but the person we’re going to pay to clean it might have something to say about you ruining the floor. By the way you never answered my question”


“I ran into an old friend, and we got to talking. Now, I’m going to take a shower and you should go put on a pretty dress because we’re going out to dinner,” my step falters as I remember who I ran into.

“Why?” she asked, genuinely surprised.

“Does a man need an occasion to take his wife out?”

“Well no, but you haven’t done it in a while. I was beginning to think you didn’t appreciate me anymore,”

“Oh how could I not? I’ll take that shower now,” I reach the top of the stairs and walk into the shower. Already over ‘trying’ with Blair.

The driver pulls up to the curb, I step out of the car quickly running around to open Blair’s door for her, trying to do the right thing. Shee looks up at me from the car seat with an odd look, but shakes her head and takes my hand as I help her out of the car. We walk side by side to the front door, I step back allowing Blair to go before me.

“Reservation for Harry styles,” I say politely to the man at the desk, he grabs two menus and motions for us to follow him to a booth on the far side of the restaurant, we take our seats and look over the menu in silence. I can hear peoples conversations all around me and one of the two men sitting at the booth next to ours laughed way too loud, like he was trying to compete with all the other voices in the room. I watched the back of their heads as the taller one leans in and whispers something in the others ear which sends them both into a fit of laughter.

“Who have I wronged to be sitting in a restaurant with Elliot and his little boy toy?” Blair says, disgusted as she studied her menu.


“Wait, what?” I snap out of my trance and look at her.


She looks at me like I was an idiot. “Elliot Hurth and Niall Horan. Geez Harry you’d think you’d notice your ex-boyfriend.”


“That’s Elliot?” She raises her perfect eyebrow at me. So that’s the famous Elliot Hurth, the actor, the guy who’s got Niall, my Niall, wrapped around his little finger. What luck do I have to be seated at the table right next to theirs?


“Wow Harry, I really thought you would know what he looks like, we’ve all been featured in the same articles for weeks now. Or maybe you were too busy fantasizing over the other brunette to notice anything else,” she says, going back to her menu.


I shoot her a dirty look over the top of the menu booklet, “He looks different somehow. Let’s just order.”


I’m not sure when it happened, maybe after the second bottle of wine, maybe when Niall and Elliot finally noticed us sitting beside them, maybe it happened after I accidently invited them over. The point is, is that it happened and now Niall and Elliot are sitting on the other side of the booth to Blair and I. All of us trying to find a spot on the wall we can focus on instead of each other.


“Well this is a bit awkward, isn’t it? Fancy being in the same restaurant, on the same night, at the same time and sat in booths right next to each other. I mean is that fate or what?” Elliot spoke up trying to diffuse some of the tension.“I’m Elliot by the way, nice to meet you Harry,” he spoke as he shoved his hand across the table for me to shake.

“Hey, ah have you met my wife Blair?” I ask, shaking his hand firmly.


“Oh me and Blair go way back, don’t we?” He says, giving me a sly wink. Either he was implying something or he’s just a very friendly guy.


“So tell us, how did you two meet?” Blair shot at Elliot, wanting to take the attention off of her, well that was something new.


“Actually we met in London, Niall was playing at this little run down café and I thought that someone with a voice like that shouldn’t be playing at that shit hole, so I befriended him. But despite me telling him he can do so much better, he continues to go back. He’s got a thing for loss causes, y’know,” Elliot’s eyes shot to mine and mine drift to Niall, his eyes stay fixed on the salt shaker that he continues to twirl in his hands. Niall thought I was a lost cause; I was shocked by how deeply I felt the stab of that in my chest.


I shift my weight slightly so I’m able to slide my leg under the table towards Niall’s. When I hit his shoe I stop waiting to see his reaction, when I receive none I bravely ran my foot up his leg, higher towards his knee, higher still towards his crouch. He shifts his position so my foot falls back to the floor with a thud.


“What was that?” Blair asks, looking around the restaurant to see who had dropped something before returning to the conversation she was having with Elliot.


I once again begin my way towards Niall, but as soon as my foot touches his he brings his up and stomps hard down on mine, I wince slightly from the force and pull my foot back.


“Elliot can you move? I need to use the bathroom,” Niall rudely says, before he practically leaps out of the booth, pushing past Elliot.


“Please and thank you often work just as well mate,” Elliot yells after him, but he was already gone.


“Ah, I’m actually going to go grab us some drinks, you guys continue,” I say, stepping out of the booth myself.


“But Harry its table service here,” Blair says, but I ignore her walking towards the bar until I was out of their site and then changing course for the bathrooms. Only one stall is closed when I get in and nobody else is around. “Niall? Are you in here mate?” I whisper, walking towards the locked stall. “Niall! Look I’m sorry okay, if you’re angry at me I’m sorry. Is that what you want to hear?”


The stall door creaks open to reveal Niall, staring at me, eyes fuming. “No Harry, I don’t want anything from you. Not your apology and sure as hell not your foot running up and down my leg while Elliot and your wife sit at the table with us.”


“Would you prefer we did it without them there?” I ask, trying to lighten the mood.


“Harry!” Okay, he was still angry. “I mean I just cannot understand how you can do that too her, you’re trying to get with me under the table while she sits there, I mean look what you’ve fucking done to me,” he moved his hands from in front of him to reveal a not very well hidden hard on I couldn’t help the laugh that escaped my lips. He looks at me seriously, “You need to try with her.”


I open my mouth to answer when the door handle to the bathroom starts turning, I step forward and push Niall into the stall he had just come out of, holding him firmly against the stall wall with the length of my body. We wait silently for the man to leave, but he seems to be taking longer than necessary. I shift my weight to my other foot, causing Niall to let out a strangled moan as I rub against him; I cover his mouth with my hand hoping the man had not heard. The man leaves but I stay where I am, I move my hand down placing it on Niall’s crotch, making him shiver. He lets out a whine and I undo his pants shoving my hand in and grabbing hold of his length, he moans out at the contact, I keep my other hand firmly pressed over his mouth. I stroke him a few times picking up the pace, when I’m shocked that two hands are pressed to my chest and I’m pushed against the other side of the stall loosing al contact with Niall. He’s standing there, breathing heavily while doing his pants back up.

“Don’t Harry,” he pauses, “make it work with Blair.” Before he walks out leaving me there.


By the time I got back to the table Elliot and Niall were gone, Blair sits alone looking like she had just sucked on a lemon. She was about to speak when I put my and up silencing her. “Let’s just go home.”

Notes

enjoy (: