I flung Zayn’s door open and shut it angrily behind me as I walked into his room and sat on his bed, not as insecure as I was before. “What is going on?!” I demanded to know, there was something I was missing.
“What do you mean?” His voice was rough.
“Emerson just left. You scared her off.” I spat at him.
“Oh.” He said as if he was actually shocked he had caused her to do such a thing.
I huffed out as I locked my eyes on his. “Why are you so closed off?” I asked in attempt to uncover some of the mystery behind his deep dark eyes.
“What?” His eyebrow contorted into confusion. “You-you don’t every talk about yourself or open up at all.”
“Oh, I-I don’t trust people I guess.” He answered shrugging his shoulders.
His dark brown eyes peered up at me— softening up and making him look like a completely different person.
“It was hard on me at the beginning. Being famous. I wasn’t sure how to handle it, especially being away from my family. After a few years of opening up to people I started to realize people only wanted to be my friend for the fame. A lot of my old school friends asked me all the time if I had some parties they could go with me too or if I could get them into clubs.”
I paid a great deal of attention to the way the words rolled off Zayn’s tongue with honesty and trust. He had trusted me with this little part of him like I had shared a little part of me with him the other night.
“My dad, he, he started hitting my mother and nothing was ever the same. He got over it but I don’t think she ever let it go.”
He had let his guard down for a slight second only to put it back up. “If you tell anyone about this I’ll end you.” He snarled as I studied his face.
I watched as he crossed his arms over his chest in such a way that he was guarding himself from my eyes.
“You should really get your eyes checked.” He added while he furrowed his brow. It was then that I realize I had gotten lost yet again studying Zayn and all his quirks and whims. “You have a really bad habit of staring.” His body shied further away as I continued to appear emotionless.
When he began to wave his hand over my face in attempt to get me to stop staring, I slapped it away freely as I let a light giggle escape my lips. I attempted to keep it in but my giggle kept going as Zayn waved his hand over my face continuously and I slapped it away laughing a bit harder every time. “Stop!” I hollered out playfully but it didn’t stop Zayn, his hand kept waving in front of me
“Stop pushing my arm away! I’m trying to fix you!” He howled out as he threw his arm up again and I pushed it back down.
The next time he waved his hand I slapped his arm down a little to hard causing a loud slapping sound to emit. My laughter cut out as I studied his eyes and his arm that he was now cradling. “Oh my gosh Zayn, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to-“
I felt my words choke in my throat as Zayn grabbed a pillow from behind him and pummeled me with it. I allowed my jaw to drop as the pillow fell in my lap and I saw Zayn’s face full of mischief and happiness. He quirked a brow sending me over the edge, I picked the pillow up quickly and threw it at him while laughing my head off.
He reciprocated my movements but this time instead of letting the pillow go, he allowed his whole body to launch towards me, knocking me back as he held the pillow in his hand—what was left of my laughter died out.
My heart began to race searching for a way to properly function. Zayn was now on top of me, his breath was deep and harsh as his eyes met mine. The pillow lie on my chest as Zayn’s hand propped himself up, hovering over me. A rough knot slipped down my throat as his face advanced towards mine, making the space between us scarce. I felt my eyes melt in his beautiful brown orbs as one of his hands sweetly pressed up against my cheek.
As he eliminated the only space left between our mouths his lips effortlessly found mine. His lips crashed against mine with urgency, making me feel tense as he deepened the kiss.
I swear my heart was pounding, my stomach twisting and turning in knots.
I gave myself a moment to let the moment sink in, realizing what was happening then quickly pulling away. My heart started to pound harder now, sending a panic through my entire body. Zayn jumped from me with wide eyes staring at me.
I wasn’t sure exactly what to do in that moment. Run away? I couldn’t. I was on Zayn watch. I couldn’t just leave.
I clumsily swung my feet around and onto the floor— as soon as I felt the cold hardwood contact my feet I ran out of his room as fast as I possibly could.
Zayn’s voice followed me. “Please, wait Spencer!” He shouted as my legs collapsed at the end of the stairs. I felt around me and swiftly crawled into a nearby corner, into the dark and out of a field of Zayn’s vision.
His giant feet stomped down the stairs forcing me to catch me breath and hold it in. Maybe he wouldn’t see me.
He didn’t because once his foot fell from the last step he darted in the other direction.
I allowed myself a moment to catch me breath. To wrap my mind around what just happened in Zayn’s bed. To punch my self in my mind for allowing it to happen—for allowing my feelings to take over—for allowing me to let Zayn, MY CLIENT, kiss me.
I was stupid and reckless.
I stayed in my dark little corner for about fifteen minutes not making a sound before Zayn finally found me.
“What the hell are you doing?! I was worried! I didn’t know where the fuck you went!” He huffed out. I allowed myself to look from my knees and towards his face that was raging with anger.
“I-I”
“Get of the damn floor.” He demanded as he crossed his arm.
As I failed to respond he viciously grabbed my arm pulling me up from the ground. “Ouch!” I winced in pain as he drug me up the stairs back into his room and threw me on the bed.
“What the FUCK is your problem?!” I screamed out as I went to massage my arm that was so wildly violated by the tall stature standing above me.
“Shut up!” He yapped back.
My eyes widened in fear as he yelled at me. I quietly sat up and sunk back into the bed.
“I can’t think when you are always yelling at me!”
I found it ironic that he was yelling while telling me not to yell.
“There is something seriously wrong with you.” I said under my breath in disgust as I crossed my arms and scrunched my face at him.
His long legs began to walk back and forth at the end of the bed making me nervous.
I grabbed for the closest pillow in case he was going to make any sudden movements of an attack of some sort.
For a moment I was worried about him, he was pacing for a good five minutes before his feet finally stopped and he threw himself on the bed.
“I’m sorry.” He stated as his body fell lazily onto the bed. He watched me as I cringed away from him afraid he would charge at me—my grip on the pillow I was holding strengthened.
His eyebrow furrowed in concern as he drug his body closer to me—I countered his acts by pushing myself until my back was up against his headboard, the pillow still grasped tightly in my arms.
A loud sigh of confusion escaped his lips as he cocked his head to the side. “A-A-Are you scared of me?”
My eyes settled on his as they filled with hurt—he was hurt.
I swallowed the lump in my throat as I continued to look into his distressed orbs.
“I-You-you hurt me.” I rubbed over my now aching arm as my voice crackled.
I watched him as his head fell into his hands and ran through his hair slowly, he appeared to be angry with himself.
“Are you okay?” I shyly asked, I wasn’t all sure what was going on at this moment. My mind was too jumbled with the frightening moment of his lips pressing up against mine and his arms dragging me up the stairs. It was all too much to take in at one moment.
His eyes looked at me in utter hysteria, it was traumatizing.
“Zayn? Do I need to get you something to drink? Or something to eat?… or maybe a girl to hook up with?” I added the last one in because I wasn’t getting any sort of reaction from him but a wide-eyed stare.
“I-I- didn’t mean to hurt you.” He uttered as his eyes held the same frantic look in them. His breath seemed to be thrusting into his chest heavily and slowly.
“Zayn, you are seriously scaring me.” He continued to stare. I moved towards him, setting my pillow towards the side. I grabbed at his shoulders. “Zayn… Zayn. ZAYN!” I shouted, causing his eyes to return to a normal size.
“I have to go.” He stated dryly.
“What? Where?” My voice filled with complete confusion. Nothing was making any sense. Zayn was so distant and strange and irritating.
“I- I’m having dinner with the guys tonight.” He shook his head as he got up from his bed and made for the bathroom. I got up just as fast and followed him.
“I can’t let you go without me.” I should have stated it in a different way but it was the first thing I could throw out last minute.
As his feet drug into the bathroom he groaned obnoxiously loud. “Why do you have to follow me every fucking place I go?”
I wasn’t sure if he was talking about me walking in the bathroom after him or me having to go with him to dinner. “Why can’t I just have this one night?” He elaborated.
“I was instructed to watch you. I’m learning.” I sounded like an idiot.
“Learning what? That is absolutely ridiculous.”
Zayn left me so speechless. He asked all the questions I wasn’t able to answer, all the ones that caught me off guard. It made me insecure and unsure of what I was doing.
“I don’t know! Can you just stop asking questions?” I ran my hand through my hair as I sat on the counter in his bathroom.
“Can you get out?” His husky voice questioned.
“Excuse me!?” I raised my voice in a fit of rage.
“I have to pee. God. Calm down you crazy slut.”
“Excuse me!” I roared out.
“Pee! Go the bathroom? Are you stupid or something?”
I was enraged with all the slurs he had thrown out within just a few seconds. “First off. I’m not a slut. Second, I’m not stupid and third, you need to get some GOD DAMN manners cause you are an ass!” I howled as I hoped off the counter. I made my way towards the door and slammed it on my way out.
I couldn’t begin to fathom the audacity of Zayn and his ego.