Letters To Lily
Chapter 4
((June 13th//Belgium))
“Some show tonight!’’ Louis says as we all enter the dressing room to freshen up and get ready to hit the road, again, well the sky I guess since we’re flying to Denmark.
I sigh to myself as I take out my phone, disappointed because there’s no messages, no miscalls, no pictures, nothing.. from Lily.
Automatically, I think that I made her mad. Or that something’s wrong with her. It scares me. Lily’s suicidal, you know, cuts herself and all that horrible stuff.
The thought of her leaving me alone on this Earth just hurts my heart. I don’t even like thinking about it.
“Yo, Niall?’’ Harry snaps me out of my thoughts suddenly.
I look at him and raise my eyebrows.
‘’You a’ight?’’ Liam asks me.
‘’No.. not really.’’ I sigh to myself.
‘’And why’s that?’’ Lou asks me, she’s always so concerned about us.
‘’Lily.. hasn’t.. texted.. or called me… all day.’’ I tell them.
‘’Well, perhaps she’s busy, Niall. Did that ever come to your mind?’’ Louis asks.
‘’Well, not really. I guess she could be. Yeah, you’re probably right. I’ll just.. let it go.’’ I find myself saying this, even though I don’t mean it.
“You boys wanna go get some dinner?’’ Lou asks all of us.
The boys respond with words. But me.. I just nod.
‘’Alrighty then, Just get changed and I’ll find us a place.’’ She says, taking out her phone. Probably to look up a restaurant.
I move the food on my plate around with the fork. Every one else is enjoying themselves, laughing and talking. But me, I just sit here and stare at my beer and wonder about my princess. I’m so worried about her. Its killing me.
‘’Ni?’’ Harry says, nudging my side.
I glance over at him, but then back to my plate with the food, that I don’t even feel like eating, sitting on it.
“She still hasn’t..?’’ He mumbles.
I shake my head ‘no’ lightly. And from the corner of my eye, I see him nod, releasing a small sigh.
I thought my world was over. I thought my life was over. I couldn’t handle not hearing from her.
We’re supposed to talk all the time, and today seems as if it’s been the longest day of my entire life.
“You need to eat, Niall.’’ Lou says from across the table.
‘’I’m not in the mood.’’ I sigh under my breath.
‘’What?’’ She asks, unable to have heard me.
‘’I said.. I’m not in the fucking mood.’’ I raise my voice as I glance at everyone. But then I soon tend to my own business, and my own unfinished plate.
My eyes stare at my phone screen. Its unlocked and I can see the picture of Lily, my wallpaper and lock screen.
I was hoping she would call, text, or do something in some sort of communication. But nothing. Nothing at all. Its late here, so I know its probably a busy time over there.
But I’m hoping that she’ll be able to call me tomorrow. And perhaps I can get a hold of her in the morning, same time as the other day.
The plane was boring me to death. We didn’t stay long here in Belgium, but we had places to be soon. So, I don’t complain as much as you may think.
“Some show tonight!’’ Louis says as we all enter the dressing room to freshen up and get ready to hit the road, again, well the sky I guess since we’re flying to Denmark.
I sigh to myself as I take out my phone, disappointed because there’s no messages, no miscalls, no pictures, nothing.. from Lily.
Automatically, I think that I made her mad. Or that something’s wrong with her. It scares me. Lily’s suicidal, you know, cuts herself and all that horrible stuff.
The thought of her leaving me alone on this Earth just hurts my heart. I don’t even like thinking about it.
“Yo, Niall?’’ Harry snaps me out of my thoughts suddenly.
I look at him and raise my eyebrows.
‘’You a’ight?’’ Liam asks me.
‘’No.. not really.’’ I sigh to myself.
‘’And why’s that?’’ Lou asks me, she’s always so concerned about us.
‘’Lily.. hasn’t.. texted.. or called me… all day.’’ I tell them.
‘’Well, perhaps she’s busy, Niall. Did that ever come to your mind?’’ Louis asks.
‘’Well, not really. I guess she could be. Yeah, you’re probably right. I’ll just.. let it go.’’ I find myself saying this, even though I don’t mean it.
“You boys wanna go get some dinner?’’ Lou asks all of us.
The boys respond with words. But me.. I just nod.
‘’Alrighty then, Just get changed and I’ll find us a place.’’ She says, taking out her phone. Probably to look up a restaurant.
I move the food on my plate around with the fork. Every one else is enjoying themselves, laughing and talking. But me, I just sit here and stare at my beer and wonder about my princess. I’m so worried about her. Its killing me.
‘’Ni?’’ Harry says, nudging my side.
I glance over at him, but then back to my plate with the food, that I don’t even feel like eating, sitting on it.
“She still hasn’t..?’’ He mumbles.
I shake my head ‘no’ lightly. And from the corner of my eye, I see him nod, releasing a small sigh.
I thought my world was over. I thought my life was over. I couldn’t handle not hearing from her.
We’re supposed to talk all the time, and today seems as if it’s been the longest day of my entire life.
“You need to eat, Niall.’’ Lou says from across the table.
‘’I’m not in the mood.’’ I sigh under my breath.
‘’What?’’ She asks, unable to have heard me.
‘’I said.. I’m not in the fucking mood.’’ I raise my voice as I glance at everyone. But then I soon tend to my own business, and my own unfinished plate.
My eyes stare at my phone screen. Its unlocked and I can see the picture of Lily, my wallpaper and lock screen.
I was hoping she would call, text, or do something in some sort of communication. But nothing. Nothing at all. Its late here, so I know its probably a busy time over there.
But I’m hoping that she’ll be able to call me tomorrow. And perhaps I can get a hold of her in the morning, same time as the other day.
The plane was boring me to death. We didn’t stay long here in Belgium, but we had places to be soon. So, I don’t complain as much as you may think.
Notes
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5/25/15