All Again

CHAPTER THIRTY
Becca.

Then.

My laugh pierced the air as Harry once again showed me why he was a better real estate agent than a singer.
“This really needs to be your profession.” I remarked as Harry led me around his house; our hands interlinked.
“Maybe when I retire.” he said, taking me to another bedroom. There were four bedrooms, and 5½ baths.
His house was big. Much too large for one person and I wondered if he got lonely often.
As we moved to his backyard, complete with a pool and wide open sitting area, I was in complete awe.
“I can’t believe you live here by yourself.” I said.
He smiled. “Not all the time.” he explained. “I like to be around my mates a lot.”
He turned away from me.
“I’m going to be expanding all of this soon. When I go on tour later in the year, I’m going to have some renovations done and have this whole area re-worked.” he said, pointing at various parts of his lawn. “It’s going to look completely different. Or maybe I‘ll sell it…I haven‘t decided yet. ”
As I looked back at his lawn and tried to envision the future changes, I didn’t get it. His house was quite perfect already.
Why would he ever want to leave?
He continued the tour, moving back in the house.
He headed to his 'Summer Room’-a massively lavish space complete with individual seating areas and plush couches. There were pictures of his family and a few unique art pieces.
It was all quite comfortable.
“I like to read in here.” he said. “And write. I actually composed some of the songs from the last album here.”
I smiled, picturing him on the couch, a pen in hand and his hair wild, while ideas came to him.
We left the room.
As we headed back out into the main center of the house, he turned to me.
“So do you like it?” he asked.
“I love it.” I said. “I don’t get why you don’t stay here. I would never leave.”
He swung our hands back and forth and smiled.
Harry began to pull me towards the kitchen.
“So I’m going to order a pizza. Do you want anything?”
I shook my head no as our hands broke apart. He moved around to the other side of the counter.
“You sure? Its good stuff.” he said pulling his phone from his pocket.
“What kind are you getting?”
“Pepperoni with oregano and basil. It’s amazing. My favorite place in town.” he said proudly.
“Sure. You‘ve talked me into it.” I said and sat on one of his kitchen stools.
He stood across from me and leaned on the counter.
He punched some numbers in his phone and connected it to his ear.
“I’m not this boring.” he said suddenly. “I just realized I was hungry.”
I chuckled. “I don’t think you’re boring Harry.”
He smiled.
“You can turn on the TV or something. Explore.” he said but before I could answer, someone came to the phone. “Oh Hello? Hi, I want to place an order.”
I didn’t move from my spot.
If only he knew how content I was to watch him.
He had on a loose shirt that was partially open and his skinny jeans. I could see the heads of his bird tattoos and the beginning of his butterfly tattoo.
My mind briefly ran to us weeks earlier, and me running my hands over his chest as I sat on top of him and we kissed.
I wondered if he ever thought about that and the amazing nights we shared.
As he continued the order, and gave gate instructions, I studied the kitchen.
Like the rest of the house, it was large.
I saw the usual things: a fruit bowl, a coffee pot, hand soap. It was all very normal, but all very not at the same time. Kind of like Harry.
As I continued scanning and Harry gave out his credit card information, imaginative images of Harry cooking came to mind. I wondered what his specialty was.
Harry hung up the phone.
“Forty five minutes.” he said.
“Alright,” I said and gestured to the kitchen.“Your decorations?”
He looked at his decorative plates in the corner and impeccably clean countertops.
“No. I don’t have time.” he said honestly. “I’m usually only home for two weeks max before I have to head out again. I think back in January was the longest I’ve been home in a while.”
“And do you consider this your home?”
“Yeah. Here and London. I use to spend a lot of time in New York as well, but I don’t like to go in the winters. Plus I’m not dating anyone that lives there anymore.”
For a moment I thought of me. Technically I did live in New York; at least a vast majority of the time.
Harry must have read my thoughts because he quickly revised his statement.
“I mean at this second.” he clarified quickly, practically fumbling over his words.
I just smiled.
I climbed off the stool and leaned on the counter towards him.
“Real smooth.” I teased.
He laughed gently to himself. “So…now that your home, what do you do with your summers?”
I shrugged. “Help out at the stores, spend time with friends from high school and family, ya know…nothing too exciting.” I said. “Before I started college, we use to go on vacations in the summers but my parents have been so busy lately…”
“What has been your favorite vacation?” he asked curiously.
“Disneyworld!” I said in mock excitement, channeling my inner six year old. “And then Universal Studios.”
He shook his head no instantly.
“I can’t take the rides. I hate rollercoasters.”
“Well that’s only because you haven’t been on a rollercoaster with me.” I said flirting.
Harry grinned and leaned towards me.
“And how would you make it any different?”
“Well I mean, you’ll be in my presence.” I said. “That should be enough to relax you.”
He smirked with wide prominent dimples on display. “What if it’s the opposite though? What if your presence excites me?”
“Does it?” I dared, keeping a serious face and he blushed.
He actually turned a little red.
It was adorable.
He pulled away from me a bit. “Don’t know.” he said and cleared his throat quickly. “Um, lets go in here…“ he said, quickly changing the subject.
I watched him. He was actually shy.
I didn’t think I had ever seen that in the entire time I had known him.
He led me to the living room and gestured for me to sit down as he turned on the TV.
I did and he took a seat beside me and pulled out his cell phone.
I didn’t hear a ring but apparently someone was calling him.
“It’s my brother.” he said.
I looked at him in surprise.
“I didn’t know that you had a brother.”
“Step Brother.” he emphasized. “I’ll call him back.” he said and placed his phone on the table.
“Are you guys close?”
“I guess. He’s been in my life for a while. My Mum and Step Dad have been together since I was younger.”
“Oh.” I said. “Are you and your dad close? You never really talk about him.” I noted.
“We’re closer now than we were when I was growing up.” he said shifting towards me so I had his full attention. “After my parents divorced, he kind of crept in the shadows. We saw him regularly but it was just a little weird, especially when Robin-my step dad- came in the picture. But since all this,”
He gestured to his house and his fame. “We’ve grown closer.”
“That’s good.” I said.
“What about you? I don't think i've asked you, how long have your parents been together?”
“Well their story is kind of funny. They were high school sweethearts.”
“Oooh.” Harry swooned and I smiled.
“It gets better.” I promised. “They broke up when they went off to their colleges and like five or six years later, they ran into each other at a store. And by then they were with other people and my mom was actually engaged to this guy,”
“Oh boy.” Harry cut in. I nodded yes.
“So they started hanging out, kind of seeing each other on the sly…but not cheating. And um, eventually they just ended up back together.”
“And then you came.” he said with a smile.
“Yup. About a year later.”
He chuckled. “Oh wow. I was thinking some years down the line.”
“Nope.” I said. “They were kind of scandalous. I don‘t think I could ever do that to someone else though. I mean I get it, they were still in love with each other…but…sometimes it’s best to let things just die ya know? They probably really hurt the other people. ”
“No. They were in love.” he argued. “What if they were soul mates? Besides, you wouldn’t be here.”
“So you would have done the same thing?” I asked curiously.
“Absolutely.” he said. “If I really loved that person, yeah. I would fight.”
I giggled. “You must be a hopeless romantic.”
“I am actually.” he said. “Don’t tell anybody.”
I turned to the TV. “What’s your favorite movie?”
He grinned widely and turned from me.
“The Notebook.”
“It is not!” I shrieked.
“It is. I promise.” he said and laughed.
“Wow.” I said.
He smiled wider. “Well don’t say it that way. Sounds very emasculating.”
I giggled. “Believe me, I find you very masculine Harry.”
He didn’t verbally respond but he turned from me and pressed his back against the couch, his smile still wide on his face.
He crossed his arms and looked at the TV. It was quiet for a few moments, then…
“I’m glad you called me back Becca.”
“I am too.” I said honestly.
We watched a bit of TV and waited for the pizza, keeping the conversation casual and focused on the actors on the screen. We had already progressed so far in our relationship that it felt weird starting over, but it seemed awkward to just jump back into the kissing and closeness we had before. Harry seemed keen on keeping a respectable distance and not pushing anything on me.
We still hadn’t discussed his reason for pushing me away and I wanted to get into it, but I also didn’t want to ruin the mood.
When the pizza finally arrived, we settled back in front of the TV with plates and dug in.
Harry wasn’t lying.
“This is amazing.” I said after my first few bites.
“See. I told you.” Harry said devouring his slice as well.
I smiled, when a small slither of sauce remained on the corner of his mouth.
Before he could remove it, I swiped it with my finger and placed it in my mouth. The sauce was so good, that I sucked it from my finger slowly, savoring it.
I turned back to the TV, grabbing another slice but I could feel Harry’s eyes on me.
I turned back to him. What?
“That was.... really sexy.” he said and I smiled.
I playfully rolled my eyes and threw a napkin at him.
He grinned and his wide green eyes peered back at me in interest.
“So what did I miss?” he asked casually. Once again he shifted his body towards me and brought a leg up to rest under him.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean. What’s new in your life? How did your finals and stuff go?”
“Oh alright.” I said nonchalantly. “I passed that class I hated with a B, so I guess I did okay.”
“And what about Kelsey? She still hate all of her teachers?”
I smiled. I had spoke about her from time to time. It was only natural since she was another sister to me.
“Of course. But she did surprisingly well this semester.”
“And now you only have one semester left right?”
I nodded. “Though I am considering additional schooling right away. I double major as you know, but…I don’t know, I just want to get it out of the way.”
Harry finished up his pizza slice. “You’re a busy girl.”
“Only when I’m in school. When I’m home-like now- I’m starved for things to do.” I said honestly.
“Oh so that’s why you called me back? Thanks a lot.” he joked and I smiled.
“No.” I just said.
We finished up our slices of pizza and then searched for something more to watch on TV. It wasn’t like Hong Kong where we could travel in public and not be noticed. I was sure as Harry had stated, that he was good at hiding, but that was just pushing my luck.
I wasn’t ready for those conversations with family and friends.
Harry seemed concerned though.
“Are you okay with this?” he asked as we lounged on the couch. “I feel like I’m being pretty boring.”
“No I’m fine.” I assured him.
“Okay,” he said. “Because I do go out and do stuff.” he said with a chuckle. “I don’t want you to think I’m a total sloth.”
“No I like this. I’m comfortable.”
“Good.” he said.
I turned to him, giving him my full attention.
“So I know you briefly told me, but what else do you like to do, when you’re not with your friends and family?”
He shrugged. “I don’t really remember what I told you. It‘s been so long,” he said honestly. “But um, I read. I write. I sleep…I like to keep up with my social stuff for work,” he said gesturing to his phone, “And uh… I do a lot of photography and I’ve started painting.”
“Painting?” I asked in interest.
He nodded.
“What do you paint?”
“Complete shit.” he said and laughed. “But it’s relaxing.”
“Will you show me?” I asked curiously and then the cherry cheeks returned.
“Um..” he mumbled nervously, looking at the TV. “I don’t really share the painting stuff. It’s not that good.”
“Okay well show me your photos.”
He smiled quicker this time. I could tell it was a source of pride for him.
“Alright.” he said with a wide smile and stood. “Give me a sec.”
He headed out of the living room and headed to the back of his house.
While he was gone, I checked my phone to make sure no one was looking for me.
Satisfied that no one cared, I set my phone back down and Harry jogged back in the room.
He had a large camera and a book in his hand.
He took a seat close to me but quickly gave a warning.
“Now, I’m not a professional,” he said. “So be kind.”
I smiled and crossed my heart.
He turned on the camera first and then handed it to me.
“You can just shift through them. There are no naughty pictures.”
“Aww man.” I groaned. “I was hoping one would pop up.” I said.
“You can take one of me later.” he said lightheartedly.
I looked back at him, and he seemed to catch what he said.
He quickly turned from me and cleared his throat again; the sexual tension between us now present and thick.
There was no doubt in my mind we were having the same thoughts.
The goosebump rising, toes curling, incredible last night we had in Hong Kong.
Still, Harry seemed reserved as it was suggested.
I smiled and began to look at the pictures.
I was starting to really like this shy side of him.
I was use to seeing him so dominant and confident.
I shuffled through the pictures.
Random images of buildings, and animals stared back at me. Abstract images of benches, signs, backstage areas and hotel rooms. Photos of friends and skies, and signed guitars with the occasional cat and band.
"Wow." I said, as I reached my last one. "I'm surprised."
"What?" he asked a bit quickly. I could tell he was uneasy about sharing his work.
"It's better than I expected." I said honestly. "You took all these pictures?" I asked.
He nodded. "It started as like a hobby but I’ve got some decent shots I think."
"You've got a lot of good shots Harry." I reassured.
He handed me the book he was holding.
It was a photo album, and all of these pictures were black and white.
I shuffled through them.
Well I could definitely say he was not vain. I didn't see one picture of him, except a picture he had taken of his knee and a rip in his jeans.
"Do you really like them?" he asked as he watched me.
"I really do." I said softly.
He smiled shyly and turned from me watching the TV.
I finished looking through his mini portfolio and set it on his coffee table.
"Why don't you share your work?" I asked.
"I do." he said. "Sometimes. I've posted some stuff on Instagram but..." he trailed off.
"You should post more." I encouraged.
"Maybe one day." he said simply. "I think it’s kind of boring to people sometimes."
"Who cares." I said honestly. "Its your page."
He shrugged me away. "Yeah but my fans don't want to see that. They want to see me and stuff with the guys."
I didn't respond immediately. He kind of had a point. I was a victim myself of wishing he would post a picture of himself sometimes.
"Well that's just because people like to look at you." I said honestly. "You're very handsome Harry."
He bit his lip and gave me a cheeky grin.
"Oh really?" he asked. He said it as if it was his first time hearing it.
I rolled my eyes. "Anyways...you know you’re gorgeous." I said ignoring him and he chuckled beside me.
We said nothing more about the photographs and once again began talking about random things on TV.

Time passed quickly.
I was enjoying lying back on his couch, feet propped up, and just talking.
At times there was silence, but it was relaxed. We didn't have to force a rapport, because it naturally came and settled between us.
A few times his or my phone would ring, and we would either ignore it, or quickly end the call and then get right back to each other.
I forgot quickly that we hadn't spent almost two months together.
Around seven, our TV nostalgia ended.
"That's Niall." he explained looking at his phone. "I'm being called to the studio early."
"Oh." I said, instantly sitting up. I was far from wanting to leave, but I knew that was my cue.
It was getting dark outside now and we had spent the entire afternoon together.
Harry turned to me. He was standing and looking down at me.
"What time do you have to be home?"
“I don't have a curfew."
Harry looked at me in interest. "Really? Like at all?"
"Well I live in New York most of the year. My parents don't really think it's fair to put rules on me for three months out of the year when I don't have them any other time."
Harry nodded 'okay'. "Well that’s a good way to look at it."
I agreed and stood.
He looked around his living room, surveying. By now, we had blankets on the couch and water bottles on the table.
The pizza box was long in the refrigerator and we were snacking on a fruit platter Harry kept in the house.
I figured he wanted me to clean up, so I bent to pick up my mess.
But he had other ideas.
"Hey?" he called out suddenly. I looked up at him. "Do you want to come with me?"
"With you?" I asked in confusion.
"To the studio?" he asked tucking his hands in his jeans. "We're not doing any recording tonight, just bouncing off ideas."
I looked at him in reservation. "Would it be okay if I come? I mean it's your work?"
"Of course." he said shaking the thought away. "Besides, I still want to hang out." he said.
I was relieved to hear him say the same thought I had in my mind.
"Okay." I agreed though I didn't need a lot of coaxing.
"Cool." he said warmly. "Let me just put this away."
He gestured down to the fruit and tucked his phone in his pocket. As he lifted the tray, I began to go for the blankets folding them up. By the time he came back, tray-less, I had cleaned up the area back to its original state.
"Thanks." he said kindly.
"No problem." I said.
He gave me another smile and then gestured away from me.
"Follow me kay?"
I did as he said and he led us upstairs. I had been up there earlier for his tour and immediately identified when we started heading to his bedroom.
"I just want to grab a jacket." he explained. "Would you like a heavier sweater?"
My mind instantly rewound to his grey shirt I had worn in Bangkok and the smell of his cologne against my skin. I couldn't get enough of it that day.
"Yes!" I said quickly.
Too quickly.
Harry lightly giggled and flicked on his bedroom light.
Like before, I took in the details of his personal space.
It was quaint and cozy and he had an amazing view.
As he headed for a dresser, I headed for his balcony.
"May I?" I asked gesturing to the door that led outside.
"Sure." he said.
I turned away from him and pulled it open.
I could feel the slight breeze of the Los Angeles air but it was a beautiful night. I didn't think we would even need the jackets.
I leaned on his balcony porch and took in the lights of the city I could see.
Seconds later, I could hear him come beside me.
When I turned to face him, he was smiling and holding a sweater in his hand.
"Is this alright?"
I looked down at the white and black pullover that had the words “J'ai du vague à l'âme” written on them.
"It's perfect." I said politely taking it from his hands. "What does it mean?"
Harry smiled and shrugged.
"Not sure. It's from my friends' line. Guess I should have asked huh?" he joked.
I just smiled and turned back to the view.
"You are so lucky Harry."
He didn't respond and just peered at the lights with me.
He placed his hands on the railing, curling them, and then leaned down.
"I like coming out here. It's humbling." he said softly. "Reminds me quickly just where I stand you know?" he said peering up at me.
Though it was dark, his green eyes sparkled and captivated me.
"Yeah." I mumbled, under his spell.
He continued his gaze. "It's like, we're just one person, and this," he said looking back at the vast expanse of southern Los Angeles, "just reminds me that there are billions of people on this earth. Everyone is living their lives and going different paths...I'm just one person." he said simply.
I finally turned from him.
He was just one person, but he was an incredible person.
He was so unimpressed by his fame or the height of his success and it was so sexy to watch.
After a few minutes, he lifted from the rail.
"We should go." he said quietly. "We're not that close to the studio and there could be traffic."
"Okay." I said agreeing and wrapping his sweater in my arms.
As we headed downstairs, I snuck a quick smell when he wasn't looking and as I expected, it smelled like him.
Mmmmmm
Harry secured the house, punching in a key code while I grabbed my purse then we were gone.
We climbed back in the Range Rover, and unlike before, Harry turned the air conditioner off and put the windows down.
As I said, the temp outside was fairly warm and I welcomed the breeze. Harry put his radio on a light rock station and then we were off.
This ride was more peaceful than the first.
As I rested my head back on his seat, and the wind blew my hair, I had to remind myself this was once again temporary.
I was at such peace with him.
With the soft singing of Chris De Burgh's Lady in Red, Harry's soft humming, and the soft drum of his fingers on the steering wheel, I felt like I was in a small part of Heaven.
Harry had pulled his hair up into a bun, and was so focused on the road that I don't even think he caught my stare- but it was there.
As the city lights danced off his face and the small loose strands of his hair flew by his neck, his chiseled jawline hardened and I couldn't turn away. I was in awe.
"What are you thinking about?" he asked me finally, ten minutes into the ride.
"Nothing." I said still staring and grinning. I was sure my voice gave it all away.
He turned to me and grinned. My hair whipped and moved around me.
"Liar." he said softly and then did the unexpected.
He reached and grabbed my left hand with his right, and curled his fingers in mine. He pulled my arm gently and then rested our hands on his lap.
It was such a small gesture, but so intimate.
Our eyes met but neither one of us verbally acknowledged what he did.
For a moment, I was once again taken back to the hotel room in Hong Kong when we had sex.
His lips on me…
Our skin rubbing…
The closeness…
And then before I knew it, the words were out of my mind.
"Do you ever think about it Harry?" I asked.
"Think about what?" he asked gently, alternating his eyes between me and the road.
"That night in Hong Kong. The night, we…you know…" I said.
He turned to me slowly. His eyes were unreadable.
He gently rubbed the skin on my forefinger between his.
"Of course." He said. "All the time."
We were in traffic now so he kept his eyes on the road, but continued.
"I haven't been with anyone else...since then." he offered and glanced at me quickly.
I smiled. I didn't know why he had mentioned that.
I just said a simple "Okay..." but my voice had a question to it.
"I just didn't want you to think that's why...it wasn't someone else." he said.
"No?" I asked to clarify.
He shook his head no. I smiled. It was satisfying to hear.
"But what about you?" he asked. "Any hot dates?" he teased.
"Actually yeah. When you called me I was on one."
He turned to me quickly. "Are you joking?"
"No." I said and giggled.
He looked back at the road. His eyes darted back and forth, studying the road.
"I feel like you’re kidding." he muttered. “You really were on a date…when I called?”
"Yeah, I really was.“ I said sitting up. The action, caused our hands to disconnect and he used the few seconds to place his hand on the steering wheel.
Dropping his left hand that was previously driving, he began to twirl the sleeve of his shirt on his right arm.
"So who is he?" he asked.
His tone was playful but I caught a hint of jealously.
"Some guy that Kelsey tried to hook me up with. He's her boyfriend's best friend." I said passively, crossing my arms.
Harry turned to me for a few seconds.
"So are you guys dating or..." his voice tapered off purposefully so I would finish it.
I smiled. "Does it sound like we're dating?"
He smirked quickly. "I don't know." he said. "I didn't think you would move on that quick."
I leaned forward and turned my body towards his.
"Harry who says I’ve moved on? I mean I’m here with you right?"
He didn't look at me, but a small smile gathered on his face.
"So, you're not dating him?" he asked again for clarification.
"No." I said.
He turned back to me. "What does he look like?"
I giggled. "I'm not answering that." And Harry chuckled as well, turning from me and focusing on the road.
I could tell it was a joke and he really didn't want to know...but he was jealous.
I could actually tell it bothered him a little.
We listened to the radio for a few more minutes until our attention was pulled to the car beside us.
We were on the highway but a car next to us began to honk loudly to get our attention.
“Harry! Harry!!!”
“Oh my God. It’s you!!”
I instantly bent down and grabbed my sunglasses to cover my face.
Harry remained pretty calm and tried to get the girls in the car to calm down and pay attention to the road.
I could hear them screaming 'I love you!' and 'Thank you!', while Harry just kept instructing them to pay attention to the road and drive safely.
I wanted to watch, but didn’t want to call too much attention to myself so I tried to stay out of the frame.
I think Harry remembered I was in the car, because he rolled our windows up after the twenty second exchange and quickly changed lanes after a few seconds.
"Sorry." he said, turning down his radio.
"No it's fine." I assured him. "I just can't believe they did that. They could have caused an accident." I said seriously.
Harry just shrugged it off, obviously use to it.
When we got further ahead of them, Harry put our windows back down and reached for my hand again.
I gave it to him and he placed it back on his lap.
When we reached our exit, Harry got off of the highway and then we were back in the busy streets of Los Angeles.
As he got on a main street, my phone chimed.
It was my mom.
*Will you be home for dinner?*
I quickly texted her back.
*No I don't know when I'll be home*
*Are you with Kelsey?*
*No. Friend from High School.*
*Be safe.* my mom said safely and I threw my phone by my feet.
"Your parents?" Harry asked.
I nodded. "Mom just wanted to know if I would be home for dinner."
"Aww." he said. "Your mum seems sweet."
"She is." I said honestly. It was kind of sickening how people adored her. It was if she never did any wrongs.
"So what did you tell them?"
"I'm with a friend."
"Oh your date from the other night huh?" He teased.
I smiled. "Of course."
He smiled back.
"Well I don't like him. Whoever he is."
I pulled our interlaced hands to my lips and kissed his hand.
"Trust me I don't either."
He smiled so wide that his teeth scraped his bottom lip.
Then he pulled our hands back to him and kissed my hand back.
We smiled like idiots before turning back to the road.
I focused on the street and had to talk myself down again.
This is only temporary....
This is only temporary...
This is only temporary...
But it was too late.
I was already falling again.

Notes

I'm glad a lot of you still seem to be enjoying the updates. I will be posting another update soon!