All Again

CHAPTER FOURTEEN
HARRY
Now.
She is stalling.
“What do you want in your tea?”
I keep watching her. I can’t take my eyes off of the Becca Johnson of today.
Since she has untied her light brown hair and let it fall, I have been mesmerized. The color does wonders for her complexion. It makes her tan skin appear a little richer and her hazel eyes appear golden.
I think I could already be in love again. If I wasn't already.
I turn from her and look down at my fingers.
“Nothing.” I answer quietly.
I can’t figure it out.
Why is she still so beautiful to me?
I have met thousands of women and have met women society would deem as ‘prettier’ than her.
Yet, she is still the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.
She moves around the kitchen with ease, hitting the tea bags against her hand.
She grabs the coffee cups and honey out of the cupboard and then very slowly begins to prepare the tea.
I watch her as she fills a tea kettle with water and turns it on.
She moves as slow as possible and draws the process out.
Yup, she is completely stalling. However, I am grateful for it.
From the moment I had said ‘alright, here goes’, she hopped up stopping me.
“I want some tea. Don’t you want some tea?” she asked me.
I didn’t but I wanted more time with her. “Why not?” I said.
Now, five minutes later, I stare back at her watching her procrastinate.
As I look back at her, I can’t hold the words in any longer.
“I really do like your hair.” I say.
She instantly turns to me with defensive eyes. Her claws primed and ready.
I place my hands up in surrender.
“Really. I wasn’t being sarcastic. It suits you.” I say softly.
Her features soften and I see the hint of a smile.
She looks me over.
She gestures to my hair.
“Its weird seeing it short again. You think you’ll ever grow it back?”
I shrug. It’s been a while since my hair was long. I had allowed it to grow to my chest until I decided to donate it to charity a few years back.
“Maybe. I don’t think Julie would like it though.”
Honestly she hates the length it is now even though I keep it pushed back most of the time.
I can’t help thinking she would like something more like Chase; short, and clean cut.
“What happened to not living your life for other people?” Becca asks resting her hands on the counter. Her tone isn’t rude, but her words are.
I feel like she wants an argument with me.
“She’s going to be my wife. It’s slightly different.” I point out.
Becca doesn’t say anything immediately and turns.
Behind her, the tea kettle is heating up and the stove snaps as it warms.
“Well…I wouldn’t make you keep it cut.” She mumbles, just so that I can barely hear it, but I do.
I smile.
“I know Bec.” I say.
She turns to me and her eyes grow wide at her old nickname. I must admit it feels foreign on my tongue as well.
She clears her throat. She takes a seat on one of her stools.
“Can I ask you a question?”
I lean forward in my seat across from her.
“Sure.”
“Why her?” she asks resting her elbows and cupping her hands together. “Why is she the one?”
I look back at her.
Well I wasn’t expecting that…
“Um…why?” I ask with hesitation. This could be the calm before the storm. If I am reading the Becca of now, she is going to say something crude after I reply.
She shrugs. “Just curious.”
Her tone is casual and she doesn’t seem to care if I answer or not.
I debate if I should. Then I figure, why not.
No one would ever know my answer.
Becca wasn’t going to ever admit that I was here.
“She’s not the one. Not even close. But she’s the closest I’ve come since us.” I say honestly.
I expect Becca to blink or shift-anything- but she remains stoic.
“You’re saying I was the one?” she asks.
Of course you are!
I turn from her. It’s shocking to me that she has to ask.
“Was I?” I ask because now she has my interest.
“The one?”
“Yeah.”
She takes a deep breath in and expels it loudly. “Guess we’ll see.” And then she hops off the stool.
“What does that mean?” I ask quickly.
After all this time does she still feel the same?
Could there still maybe be a teeny tiny slither of hope…
I am engaged but I feel a strange excitement.
“Not what you think it does.” She says looking back at me. “I’m pretty sure I’m going to marry Chase so-“
I cut her off. “But that’s not what you said.”
She turns and ignores me and my hopeful expression.
“I’m going to get the tea ready.”
I roll my eyes and hop off the stool.
This girl drives me absolutely insane and she knows it.
“I’m going to take it as yes then.” I say. “That must mean you think I was the one.”
She shrugs and slightly turns back to me. “I did Harry. For a long time I thought you were my soul mate. But I learned quickly in this life you can have many soul mates and they don’t always last.”
It hurts, but I know she is partially right. You can love multiple people in this lifetime. I believe you can even have different kinds of soul mates that equal out to be friends or lovers.
But….you don’t get multiple ones.
That title is reserved for someone special.
She is my one, and I guess she feels Chase is hers.
“So you’re going to marry Chase then? Have you guys even discussed it?” I ask. I don’t even like the way the words sound in my mouth.
“A bit.” She says as the tea kettle hisses and then she laughs. “Hey maybe we should have a double wedding, that’ll be funny.” She says grabbing the Kettle off the stove.
I shift uncomfortably. “I don’t think so.”
“Oh come on? Can’t you see it? It would be hilarious.”
“I see it but I think we’re seeing two different outcomes.”
“What do you mean? You’re going to end up punching my groom?” she jokes.
“No.” I say as our eyes met. “He’ll probably end up punching me.”
“Oh yeah, and why is that?” she asks pouring the water in the cups.
I grow quiet. I can picture everything in my head.
Chase punching me. Julie crying and screaming at me.
The guests shocked faces as I ran off into the sunset with the love of my life.
Me not even caring because I would be with her again. My Becca.
If there ever was a double wedding, there was no doubt in my mind she wouldn’t be leaving with Chase.
I wouldn’t let her.
She belonged with me and the story would only end with us together.
I shift. “Yeah…I don’t think you want a double wedding.” I say finally.
She doesn’t respond as she makes the tea cups. She dressed mine the way I like, and we wait for them to seep.
Her house is eerily quiet.
I look around at her decorations and ‘touches’.
“How long did it take you to decorate this place?”
“Not long.” she says.
“It’s quiet.” I note. “Your neighborhood.”
She peers back at me.
“You should get a dog.”
“Chase doesn’t like them. He says they smell.”
I roll my eyes. “Why am I not surprised…There are ways around that Bec.”
“Will you stop calling me that please?” she asks. “No one calls me that.”
“I thought you liked it?”
“Yeah Harry, five years ago. You shouldn’t call me that anymore.”
“Well I’m sorry.” I say. “I don’t know how to not be…” I trail off, and try to revise. “I’m not use to being your friend.” I say when the words find me. “All I know is how to be the way I was, or mean to you.” I say honestly. “I can’t do the in between.”
She looks down at her cup and spins it.
“Well luckily we won‘t have to deal with each other anymore after today…”
Our eyes lock.
She is right.
What does it matter?
I reach for my cup and take a sip.
The tea hasn’t finished seeping so it is slightly bitter.
It is the perfect companion to this moment.
She catches my face and tosses a sugar packet at me.
“No it’s fine.” I say. She says nothing more and spins her cup again.
“So do you want to begin again or?”
“No. I want to finish my tea first.” she says.
“Okay.” I say quietly.
I spin my cup this time.
She looks back at me and I look back at her.
We are thinking the same thing.
What now…

Notes

Enjoy the rest of your week guys. I'll be returning in a couple days! :)