You're my one and only

"How are you feeling?" I asked quietly as I made my way in the kitchen. She had cooked pancakes and was setting them on the plates now. "Better I guess. I've been thinking," she said but her tired face told otherwise.

These days I've spent with her have been rough. She could burst into tears suddenly and then I went to hug her telling everything was going to be okay. But I wasn't really sure. She was being distant and avoided my eyes. But I tried to be strong for her.

"I'm going to see the doctor today," she said quietly.

"Why? Is everything okay? You haven't told me," I tried not to raise my voice but she hadn't mentioned it before.

"It's just a routine... and I'm also meeting some therapist," she said with her back towards me. I tried to be understanding but I hated when she didn't tell me things and when she acted so distant.

"Okay," I said airily. We sat down and started eating. She kept her eyes on the plate while I just stared at her. Her brown hair was curlier than usually probably because she hadn't done anything to it in days. She looked really tired but for me she was still the prettiest girl I had ever seen.

"Have you thought about my suggestion?" I asked when we had eaten. She caught my eyes for a second before turning away.

"I think it's better if you just go alone," she said flatly. My heart sunk as I looked at her. But she had made her decision.

"My mum would've wanted you to come."

She didn't say anything as she stood up and gathered the dishes. It looked like I had to drive by my own to Holmes Chapel. When my mum had heard the news she hadn't really given me another option but to go for a few weeks to my childhood home. "So you could gather your thoughts. And Alison comes with you ofcourse," she had said.

But Alison didn't want to. I had begged her and eventually she had said she'd think about it but now it looked like she had made her mind.

"You don't need to do that," I got up and took the dish brush of her hand. She took a step away and watched as I washed the plates.

"It's better if we don't see each other for a while. I need time to think," her voice was almost just a whisper. She needed time to think. It wasn't a new thing for me really and I was tired of putting her first. This affected me as well.

"How long?" I asked while I dried the dishes. "Just... a few weeks maybe. God! I don't know, Harry," she said frustrated and rubbed her temples with her index fingers closing her eyes.

We cleaned the kitchen in silence. I needed her to hug me but she was careful not to touch me or come too close. I hated this. We were growing further and further apart every day.

She left the room to get ready. I buried my head in my hands and concentrated on breathing in and out so I wouldn't burst into tears. It didn't take long when she came back with full clothed and ready to leave.

"I'm gonna go now," she informed. I turned my head to look at her and when she caught my gaze her eyes looked frightened. I probably looked like a mess.

"Alison, how this is going to end?" I asked her. She opened her mouth but closed it then and moved her eyes on the floor.

"We can't keep going on like this. You need to talk to me and stop avoiding me," I kept going.
"I feel like I've given my everything in this week. And you're just... there."

"It's been a week. You can't expect me to be alright after a week, Harry," she said coldly and I looked at her with watering eyes. "I'll just go now."

Alison turned on her heels towards the front door and I just watched her leaving. I heard her picking her keys and then the door closed. Then I run.

"Alison wait!" I yelled as I opened the door and she turned to look at me. "You can't leave like that," I took a few steps closing the space between us. She didn't refuse me when I took her hand in mine and we just stared at each other. "I need to kiss you before you go," I whispered.

I leaned closer to her so our noses were touching. She closed her eyes and sighed heavily. "Is this okay?" I asked and my lips brushed hers. I didn't want to frighten her away. She nodded her head a little so I pressed my lips gently to hers. I moved my lips carefully and at first she didn't kiss me back. But when I wiped her bottom lip with my tongue I got a response and she opened her mouth. She tasted sweet as always and we got lost in the kiss. She dropped her bag on the floor placing her hands to my neck. My hands found their way to her hips pulling her even closer. I couldn't help but groan when she bit my lip teasingly.

"Sorry," she was quick to step back. "Don't say that," I said and tried to pull her back by her waist but she pushed me away.

"Bye," she said weakly and I forced a smile on my face. "Bye then. I lo-," I started but thought it was better not. I watched as she gathered her bag and walked down the stairs. Somewhere deep inside me I felt like it was the last of us.

Notes