Fangirl
Felony
"Luke. Please don't." I whisper.
"I... Have to." He says, looking at the floor.
I shake my head, "No, you really don't."
"Look, you know I love you but-"
"See, after telling someone you love them, there shouldn't be a 'but'." I frown, "Fine. You can do it. You can walk away from everything." I turn around, "But once you DO, don't expect me to be there when you realize you fucked up." I snap, and with that, walk away from him.
AUTHOR'S NOTE:
OKAY. Here's another chapter. Omfg you guys wouldn't believe the week I just had. Anyway, enough of my problems, hope you liked the chapter ^-^
- R.S
I lightly shut my computer, and swirl around in my chair to face my bed. I glance at my alarm clock.
3:08 AM
I sigh and stand up, to look out my window. Another night of insomnia. Another night of no Calum. Have you ever had that feeling where it would just be easier to die. Like, you don't want to end it permanently, but you want to die to see how people would react, or how things would be without you there, and then you could choose whether to stay dead or not. I wish I could do that. I don't think anything would be different if I died. 5 Seconds of Summer don't know I exist, so it would not impact them in any way.
I stare out my window. I want Luke to be standing right there. I want him to be standing there, begging me to take him back. But he never will be. What could Luke Hemmings ever want with me. I'm literally a nobody, who is obsessed with always wanting to use the word 'legit' just because it sounds cool. I spend hours a day online and when I'm not online I'm bored out of my mind. I'm a weirdo. I keep on telling everyone I don't care what people think of me when I really just go home and cry about getting teased.
I lye down in my bed. I imagine Michael hovering over me. Then, he fades away. See, even my imagines know it won't happen. I sigh and roll over to stuff my face in the pillow. I'm never going to sleep tonight, huh?
A crazy idea washes over me. I frown in my pillow, and before I know what exactly I'm doing, I have my shoes on. It's like I'm possessed, like I'm not the one sneaking out my window, but someone else is. I shut my window quietly and start walking. What am I doing now?!
This definitely is not normal. I've never snuck out, I'm to afraid of the world! You know that moment in a movie when the main character gets so overwhelmed they start hearing voices of other characters in their head, telling them mean things or something? That's what is exactly happening to me, except it's the one voice, telling me I'm never going to meet 5 Seconds of Summer, and my writing is trash. This contest was my one shot.
Next thing I know I'm climbing the school gate. What the fuck has gotten in to me? Why am I even coming here? I have nothing to do here anyways. I look in the dark windows. I know this school doesn't have cameras.. And the teachers won't be here until at LEAST two more hours. Hm. I just circle the school a couple times, before I notice- in my Language Arts class, the teacher must've left the window partly open. I stare at it for a minute. I can hardly think before I'm prying the window open and climbing into the pitch black classroom. I feel my way around the room and eventually find the light switch and flip it on. This place is pretty creepy at night time.
My eyes search the room. It looks like how it did yesterday, obviously. My eyes land on the teacher's silver laptop sitting on her desk. Don't do it, don't do it. I open the computer, that for some reason, doesn't have a password, and bring up her email. I feel so dirty doing this. Why AM I doing this? I'm about to shut the computer when a subject catches my eye.
Re: Writing Competition Problem
I feel my finger click on it, and my eyes trace over the words.
Hi, this is Sam's mom, I just wanted to say sorry again that Sam can't accept the prize. He feels really bad about it.
-Sally
I raise an eyebrow. I read the email before that, explaining that he broke his ankle dancing... Which means I still have a chance at winning! I shut her computer and smile to myself. Then I see the hallway light turn on, and my heart starts racing so fast I can barely breathe.
"Who's in there?" A male's voice asks. I look around frantically, and out of panic, just run out of the window. When I get outside, I run faster than I ever thought I could. My breath is heavy, but I just keep running. In fact I almost forgot where my house was, I was so scared. I climbed back in my window, and fell on my bed, panting, with sweat dripping down my fore head. After running so fast and being so panicked, I don't even check to see if Calum is outside my window before falling asleep.
--- The next morning ---
"Riley." I roll over, and feel relieved for the body weight to be on the other side. "Riley!" I hear.
"What." I mumble.
"You're late for school." Jason says, then I hear the door close. I'm about to go back to sleep, when I get little glimpses off what happened last night. Holy shit. I get out of bed, and since I fell asleep in the clothes I wore yesterday, I just go to school in that. I put on my usual beanie and glasses, and run out the door. When I get to my first class, I'm hit with anxiety.
"Who's in there?" Just keeps repeating in my mind. The announcement comes on as I sit down next to Miley.
"Good morning South High! First of all, did you know about the-" My mind just keeps going back to what I did. I broke into my own school. Isn't that a crime?! "Now, an announcement from Principal Johnson!" Uh oh. "Hello. I'd uh, like to inform everyone first that someone seems to have broken into the school last night and gone through Mrs. Auburn's laptop. If anybody has any idea who did this, please tell the office immediately. It was against the law, and not acceptable. Depending on who did it, punishment will vary. Thank you." I'm silently freaking out. The class starts whispering, and Miley looks at me.
"Who do you think did it?" She asks.
"I dunno." I shrug. My stomach tightens.
"So guys, Sam O'Mar has seemed to broke his leg," Ankle. "which means someone else will get the plane ticket."
"Who?" I ask, not bothering to raise my hand.
"Whoever came in second place." She winks at me, like it was me, and I get really excited.
"Who got second place?"
"That, I'll find out tomorrow." I frown. Why would she look at me like that if she doesn't even know? Meanie face. Yes, that's the best insult I can come up with right now.
"Oh." I mutter. My phone bings and I immediately take it out.
Mukeisreal96 commented: do you want to talk about it?
I assume she is referring to my author's note of complaining, so I just turn off my phone and slide it back in my pocket. I don't like complaining to people that much, if you haven't noticed.
"I... Have to." He says, looking at the floor.
I shake my head, "No, you really don't."
"Look, you know I love you but-"
"See, after telling someone you love them, there shouldn't be a 'but'." I frown, "Fine. You can do it. You can walk away from everything." I turn around, "But once you DO, don't expect me to be there when you realize you fucked up." I snap, and with that, walk away from him.
AUTHOR'S NOTE:
OKAY. Here's another chapter. Omfg you guys wouldn't believe the week I just had. Anyway, enough of my problems, hope you liked the chapter ^-^
- R.S
I lightly shut my computer, and swirl around in my chair to face my bed. I glance at my alarm clock.
3:08 AM
I sigh and stand up, to look out my window. Another night of insomnia. Another night of no Calum. Have you ever had that feeling where it would just be easier to die. Like, you don't want to end it permanently, but you want to die to see how people would react, or how things would be without you there, and then you could choose whether to stay dead or not. I wish I could do that. I don't think anything would be different if I died. 5 Seconds of Summer don't know I exist, so it would not impact them in any way.
I stare out my window. I want Luke to be standing right there. I want him to be standing there, begging me to take him back. But he never will be. What could Luke Hemmings ever want with me. I'm literally a nobody, who is obsessed with always wanting to use the word 'legit' just because it sounds cool. I spend hours a day online and when I'm not online I'm bored out of my mind. I'm a weirdo. I keep on telling everyone I don't care what people think of me when I really just go home and cry about getting teased.
I lye down in my bed. I imagine Michael hovering over me. Then, he fades away. See, even my imagines know it won't happen. I sigh and roll over to stuff my face in the pillow. I'm never going to sleep tonight, huh?
A crazy idea washes over me. I frown in my pillow, and before I know what exactly I'm doing, I have my shoes on. It's like I'm possessed, like I'm not the one sneaking out my window, but someone else is. I shut my window quietly and start walking. What am I doing now?!
This definitely is not normal. I've never snuck out, I'm to afraid of the world! You know that moment in a movie when the main character gets so overwhelmed they start hearing voices of other characters in their head, telling them mean things or something? That's what is exactly happening to me, except it's the one voice, telling me I'm never going to meet 5 Seconds of Summer, and my writing is trash. This contest was my one shot.
Next thing I know I'm climbing the school gate. What the fuck has gotten in to me? Why am I even coming here? I have nothing to do here anyways. I look in the dark windows. I know this school doesn't have cameras.. And the teachers won't be here until at LEAST two more hours. Hm. I just circle the school a couple times, before I notice- in my Language Arts class, the teacher must've left the window partly open. I stare at it for a minute. I can hardly think before I'm prying the window open and climbing into the pitch black classroom. I feel my way around the room and eventually find the light switch and flip it on. This place is pretty creepy at night time.
My eyes search the room. It looks like how it did yesterday, obviously. My eyes land on the teacher's silver laptop sitting on her desk. Don't do it, don't do it. I open the computer, that for some reason, doesn't have a password, and bring up her email. I feel so dirty doing this. Why AM I doing this? I'm about to shut the computer when a subject catches my eye.
Re: Writing Competition Problem
I feel my finger click on it, and my eyes trace over the words.
Hi, this is Sam's mom, I just wanted to say sorry again that Sam can't accept the prize. He feels really bad about it.
-Sally
I raise an eyebrow. I read the email before that, explaining that he broke his ankle dancing... Which means I still have a chance at winning! I shut her computer and smile to myself. Then I see the hallway light turn on, and my heart starts racing so fast I can barely breathe.
"Who's in there?" A male's voice asks. I look around frantically, and out of panic, just run out of the window. When I get outside, I run faster than I ever thought I could. My breath is heavy, but I just keep running. In fact I almost forgot where my house was, I was so scared. I climbed back in my window, and fell on my bed, panting, with sweat dripping down my fore head. After running so fast and being so panicked, I don't even check to see if Calum is outside my window before falling asleep.
--- The next morning ---
"Riley." I roll over, and feel relieved for the body weight to be on the other side. "Riley!" I hear.
"What." I mumble.
"You're late for school." Jason says, then I hear the door close. I'm about to go back to sleep, when I get little glimpses off what happened last night. Holy shit. I get out of bed, and since I fell asleep in the clothes I wore yesterday, I just go to school in that. I put on my usual beanie and glasses, and run out the door. When I get to my first class, I'm hit with anxiety.
"Who's in there?" Just keeps repeating in my mind. The announcement comes on as I sit down next to Miley.
"Good morning South High! First of all, did you know about the-" My mind just keeps going back to what I did. I broke into my own school. Isn't that a crime?! "Now, an announcement from Principal Johnson!" Uh oh. "Hello. I'd uh, like to inform everyone first that someone seems to have broken into the school last night and gone through Mrs. Auburn's laptop. If anybody has any idea who did this, please tell the office immediately. It was against the law, and not acceptable. Depending on who did it, punishment will vary. Thank you." I'm silently freaking out. The class starts whispering, and Miley looks at me.
"Who do you think did it?" She asks.
"I dunno." I shrug. My stomach tightens.
"So guys, Sam O'Mar has seemed to broke his leg," Ankle. "which means someone else will get the plane ticket."
"Who?" I ask, not bothering to raise my hand.
"Whoever came in second place." She winks at me, like it was me, and I get really excited.
"Who got second place?"
"That, I'll find out tomorrow." I frown. Why would she look at me like that if she doesn't even know? Meanie face. Yes, that's the best insult I can come up with right now.
"Oh." I mutter. My phone bings and I immediately take it out.
Mukeisreal96 commented: do you want to talk about it?
I assume she is referring to my author's note of complaining, so I just turn off my phone and slide it back in my pocket. I don't like complaining to people that much, if you haven't noticed.
Notes
xx
I love this story so much, gawd.
WHAT A CUTIIIIIEEEEEES
5/6/18