Liquor Bitch

To say Lanette was pretty would be an understatement. She was gorgeous, long dark hair falling over perfectly shaped shoulders, a killer figure, wicked and yet wonderful eyes. Her chin was forever in the air, not smug but confident. Even dressed in skinnys, sneakers, and a designer tank top like she was one of the guys, she still oozed some kind of grace. And here I was looking like a try-hard bitch with that stupid red lipstick I insisted on wearing. Louis and I managed to take her to a pub not far from Big Ben, the clock tower that sat on that same river I’d considered jumping into. The River Thames. She ordered a whiskey but I ordered a few vodka shots. I didn’t pay attention to what Harry got but Louis asked to try a house wine to be followed up with a dark lager.

“It’s good to finally see you in England”, Louis smiled next to me. “What’re you doing here?”

“You say that like it’s weird I’m here”, she joked. “I have a new studio here and I was hoping to get a little recording done. Harry also promised me some sight-seeing.”

“That sounds fun”, I nodded. Lanette looked at me and smiled.

“Well, you’re not English. What’re you doing here?” she mused.

“Daffy and I decided to finally get a flat together”, Louis answered for me.

“You said you have a studio. What kind of work do you do?” I wondered.

“I’m a hip-hop artist”, Lanette replied, laughing like I’d asked a dumb question.

“I can’t say I’ve heard of you”, I admitted.

“Have you been living under a rock?” Harry questioned.

“It’s important to note my Daffy likes to joke”, Louis smirked.

Lanette shrugged. “You might be more familiar with my stage name”, she reasoned. “Hades James?”

“Oh, no I recognize that”, I lied, feigning a giggle. “Sorry, I can’t say I’ve ever actually seen your face to know like, ‘oh that’s the girl I heard on the radio the other day!’”

Lanette laughed, a gorgeous sound that no doubt made Harry melt on the inside. I know it made me melt. She was so pretty, so casual, so natural. I couldn’t stop myself, the words just started coming out. “You’re really pretty”, I said quickly. Lanette turned a small shade of pink as Louis threw an arm around me.

“Harry is too!” he beamed. “Wouldn’t they make a cute couple? I can see it now! Hady Stames! The new ship to set sail!”

“You’re a twit”, Harry mumbled, turning his own shade of pink.

I threw back one of my shots and tried smiling at the pair. “I can see it”, I agreed, leaning against Louis. We joked for a while, mostly Louis and Harry picking on each other while I threw back shots and Lanette held her whisky like a pro. After some time, my phone buzzed and showed me a text from Liam.


LIAM
we need to pick out an anniversary present for Louis


“What is it, sweetheart?” Louis wondered. I smiled and pulled away a little.

“Special surprise for you from Liam”, I informed. This would be a great chance to ask him what was with the weird looks. After texting him where we were, I looked back to Louis. “Don’t worry, we’ll be back.”

“Oh, I know you will be”, Louis mused, squeezing my hand. I tried enjoying his company for just a bit longer before Liam sent me another text saying he was outside. I said bye to everyone and quickly scurried outside to see Liam in a sleek black car I couldn’t name.

“There you are”, he muttered. “Get in.”

I walked around to the passenger’s side (which was on the left for whatever reason) and climbed in. “So um, that anniversary present?” I asked.

Liam sent me a sideways glare. “Yeah, we’ll get around to that”, he muttered. “But we have something more important to discuss. Like the fact that you’re not Aphrodite.”

That’s what this was. “Is that why you keep looking at me weird?” I questioned.

“No shit. Do you even know who the real Daffy was? What happened to her?”

“No”, I admitted.

“So then how the Hell do you know she won’t be coming back and won’t prove that you’ve been lying to Louis?”

“I don’t know that.” Liam let out a small growl and ripped a hard turn out of his steering wheel.

“What the fuck are you?” he demanded.

“Nobody.” And that was the truth.

“Answer the question. What the fuck are you?”

I bit my lip and looked down at the hands in my lap. Dirty filthy hands. “I’m...a former mattress actress”, I answered, putting it as nicely as I could.

“So my best friend is with a lying tart who probably has AIDs or something-”

“I don’t have AIDs”, I hissed. “I would’ve been fired if I had.”

“Who’s to say you weren’t fired? I mean, you’re not working anymore so?” Liam’s voice was snide as he gunned the gas pedal.

“It was a business disagreement”, I snapped. “Something you wouldn’t understand. We can go to the fucking doctor now and I’ll let you have the results.”

“If I find out Louis has so much as an itch in the wrong location, I’m calling the cops and having you arrested for knowingly spreading diseases on people to cause harm.”

“I don’t want to hurt Louis”, I muttered. “I wouldn’t hurt Louis. He’s...nice.”

“I know.” Liam stared at the road ahead, chewing on his lip. “That’s why we’re not going to tell him.”

“What?”

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “We’re not telling him”, he repeated. “Daffy has been gone for months and I was trying to convince him maybe she just didn’t have the balls to dump him but then you showed up. Lucky for you, Daffy had a bad relationship with her parents.”

“What does that mean?” I asked.

“It means they don’t know she’s dead.”

My heart slammed itself into my ribcage and stopped for a painfully empty second. The real Aphrodite is dead? That explains why her phone wasn’t on, why she didn’t reply to Louis’s letters or calls, why she never bothered to find him. I was now filling in her place. I felt dirty. I wanted to rip off these clothes. “How long ago was it?” I murmured.

“A while ago”, Liam stated. “She was supposed to finish that Sports Illustrated cover some time ago. I went to Heathrow to pick her up and...the car got flipped...she just didn’t make it and I didn’t have the heart to tell Louis. If you don’t want me telling him you’re a full blown liar, then you’ll play Aphrodite. I want him to be happy so I’ll help you with it but don’t think I won’t tell him if I have to.”

I took a deep breath. Liam knew but he wasn’t going to tell Louis I was an imposter on the condition that I made Louis happy. Seemed easy enough. He was always happy. “Thank you, Liam”, I whispered. “You really don’t know how much this means to me.”

“Stealing someone else’s life means something to you?” he scoffed. “Whatever. Your anniversary is in three days. Let’s just...find something for Louis.” We fell into silence as we drove to a few boutiques in the nicer parts of London. While Liam might’ve been mad and I might’ve felt awkward, it was nice knowing what that stare was, that he knew, and that I was being granted a free pass by the token person who knew what was happening. Hopefully, the company wouldn’t find out what was happening.

Notes

But wait! There's more! (to "Aphrodite" I mean...obviously)

Lanette's character is also something I'm trading with JasperRenee to fill Daffy into the Rapper's Alter Ego! For this reason, you should go check it out. Lanette's character is super chill and someone I really like (since we don't get a lot of hip hop around here...or anything in a different genre as far as I'm concerned). Go find it! Love it! Thank me later ;P