The cold ground that I lay on gets me up immediately, I see a ball next to me and pick up.
"Thanks" a little girl says as I hand her the ball.
Great I fell asleep on a public beach, I then sneeze and remember my little adventure in the water last night after hanging up on Harry.

He obviously saw the photo of Louis and I hugging and jump to conclusions. I can't blame him I gave him no reason to trust me anymore. I am freezing and feel the symptoms of a cold coming.

I got the shower blocs by the beach and wash myself. I sit on the bench that is in the shower and cry. How has my life come to this - homeless. I bring my knees up and rest my chin, I guess it's my karma for years I followed people intruding their private lives and posting it. I messed with Harry and his hurt of course he is but it wasn't all a lie I did and still in love with him. I always saw him a womaniser, he has the looks, the charm he has it all. But underneath all of it was a sweet, kind, innocent, genuine man and I broke his heart, but mine is also breaking without him. I guess at the end of the day I have myself to blame.

I dig into my duffle bag and quickly change http://www.fashiondivadesign.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/large-1.jpg



"No sorry" The lady behind the counter says. So I order a coffee and sit at a table and charge my phone.
It's like my millionth attempt to find a job, but there is absolutely nothing. After looking at my phone before I saw my account running out of money soon I won't be able to afford food.

I give up on finding a job and return to the beach and sit and watch the world go by. I see the little kids paying in the water while their parents keep a close eye on them. I see happy couples being in love and admiring each other, then of course elderly people waking hand in hand on the beach, a smile sweeps across my face as I admire people's happiness.


I leave the beach and decide to walk to the lighthouse I slowly make my way up and go stand where Harry and I shared our first kiss. I brush my lips with my finger and can still feel his touch I sit here and think back to when we were together I felt so guilty about kissing him because I fell for him when I know I couldn't let myself, but I did and I don't regret it one bit. I know what has happened is not the best outcome, as I sit here now though a few tears spill down my cheeks I am grateful for the amazing moments we did have and carry it in my head and heart forever.


I then go back to the beach from where I stayed last night and stay there again. Lucky it's summer time here I have no idea what I am to do when the weather becomes cooler.
My mind won't let me sleep as I realise this now on the beach is my life right now, completely alone.

It's hard to sleep as the waves keep crashing on the shore but my eyes eventually get tired and close still hearing the ocean.

---

His beautiful green eyes sparkle right in front of me "Come on Lyla, lets get you up." He whispers and I take his hand.

This isn't the first time I have dreamt of him but it feels so real and even though its just a dream I want to stay like this and live in this what feels like real life moment.




But my thoughts are interrupted.




I hear panting and my eyes slowly flicker open.





"Lyla"

Notes