The struggle is real.

April 7, 2012
A Restaurant In Bently


“Stop worrying. You look fine,” Penelope pinned half of my curled hair up and put a small burette in it, “Your bow is messed up.”

I sighed and looked in the body mirror in front of us, “I look like shit.”

She scoffed and forcefully shook her head, “You look better in this dress than I do. Trust me. So, now I’m giving it to you.”

When she was finished fixing the bow in the back, she smiled at me in the mirror. I groaned and slid my hands down my dress a few times, “Do you have any shoes I can wear?” I asked and she went to her closet.

“What size do you wear?” she asked.

“An eight,” I muttered and she smiled.

“That’s what size I wear,” she handed me a pair of black pumps and smiled again, “Those should look great with that dress.” I slipped them on and then looked at her. She looked way better than I did, and like always, I was jealous of her.

“You look better than me,” I pouted and she looked down at her outfit. She was wearing a white dress with full lace sleeves and a pair of white heels. Her hair was curled and it was in a small side bun. She looked amazing, as usual.

“I think we need to get your eyes checked out honey.” She laughed a little and I pulled her in front of the mirror, reassuring her. But then she shook her head.

“Penelope. Look at yourself. You’re perfect.” I smiled and she looked at me.

“No. You’re perfect,” she said and I shook my head, “Yes, you are. You’re tall, and you’re skinny. You’ve got beautiful blonde hair, and I’ve heard you sing sometimes. You’re beautiful, you’re fun. And you have one thing that nobody else has.” She looked down and I crossed my arms.

“What? Flat feet?” I joked and she looked back up with tears in her eyes and I tensed, putting my hand on her shoulder.

“You have Harry’s heart,” she muttered and I swallowed, pulling her in for a hug.

“I um…” I didn’t know what to say so I just kept hugging her. But then I got to thinking, “No, I don’t. You had his heart long before I did.”

She pulled away from me and smiled. “I used to think that too. But the way he looks at you Ana… I wish I was you. He used to look at me like that when we first met, and you met a couple months ago and he still looks at you like that. Every woman wants to be looked at the way Harry looks at you,” she hugged herself and I sighed, “And I think you should be together.”

“Penelope, no.” I shook my head and she glared at me.

“Anastasia. I am serious. You two are in love with each other, and I want you to have your chance while you still have it.” She sighed and I shook my head again.

“I already had a chance with Harry… And I want you to take yours.” There was a lump in my throat and I felt tears forming at the sound of my voice saying those words, “You are marrying him, Penelope.”

“Do you… Want him to marry me?” she looked into my eyes and I smiled.

No, no. Hell no. “Yeah,” my voice cracked and she pulled me back into a hug.

“Thank you,” she whispered and all of a sudden, her door opened and we both looked to see Harry.

“Penelope―” He stopped when he saw us hugging. I quickly pulled away from her and he grinned at me, “There’s someone at the front door and I don’t know who the hell he is. Would you know him by any chance?”

“Um…” she thought for a moment and I saw Harry gawking at me. I pointed at him and he grinned even wider.

“He’s tall, real slim. He looks like a fucking prep. Brown hair,” Harry described and Penelope clapped.

“Oh yeah! That’s my friend Brazton. He’s Anastasia’s date for tonight.” She smiled and I quickly looked at her.

“He’s what?” Harry and I yelled at the same time.

“What? I thought it would be fun to double date so it wouldn’t be awkward for us to sit together again.” She bit her lip and Harry hit the door frame.

“This fucker is going back to where he belongs.” Harry scrambled down the stairs and Penelope and I chased after him.

“Harry! Stop!” Penelope demanded and he slung open the door, Penelope and I reaching over his back. But I stopped when I saw Brazton. He was handsome, I give her that. But then I looked back up to Harry―angry eyes, red cheeks, disheveled hair. Nothing beats that.

“Brazton,” Penelope called and crawled underneath Harry’s trembling arms. She stepped outside to him and I put my hand on Harry’s arm, making him jerk his head towards me. He let out a breath and put his arms down, letting me step out. But then he grabbed my arm and I turned to him.

“Don’t make any dumbass mistakes tonight, Anastasia. I will be that fucker’s ass,” he snapped and I rolled my eyes. I went to pull away but he pulled me closer to him, “I mean it bébé. I’ll protect you from anyone and everyone.” I smiled a little, but then he let go of my arm and I walked up to Penelope and Brazton.

“Brazton. I want you to meet your date for tonight, Anastasia,” Penelope said cheerily and Brazton and I looked at each other.

Brazton’s lips parted and he grinned, “I’m Brazton.” He held out his hand and I put my hand in his, making him kiss it gently. Then behind us, Harry slammed the front door shut, “I feel like tonight is going to be fun just by looking at you. You’re a beauty.”

“Are you just sucking up or are you being honest?” I laughed a little and he kissed my hand again before gently letting it go.

“Oh. I’m being honest. You really are beautiful.” He looked at me under his lashes and the hair on his forehead fell in his eyes, making him look totally adorable.

“You’re not too bad yourself, stretch.” I giggled and his grin grew.

“Well, I’ll get Harry and then we can leave,” Penelope said and walked into the house. We heard quite a lot of yelling, and I let out a breath.

“You know what?” Harry slammed open the door and threw his jacket on. “Fuck you, Penelope! I don’t give a shit about what you say! Let’s go Anastasia,” he barked and walked past Brazton and I.

“Come on, Penelope.” I turned to her and she was crying, “It’s okay. Let’s just get this over with. He’ll calm down.” I assured her and she nodded her head, wiping at her cheeks. “Come on,” I told Brazton and they both followed behind me.

“Ana,” Penelope said behind me and I looked at her, “Can you sit in the front?”

“Um, sure.” I smiled and we walked the rest of the way to Harry’s car. I slid in the passenger seat up front and buckled.

“I’m glad you took thirty-seven fucking years to get in the damn car,” Harry snapped and I glared at him.

“Well if you weren’t pissed off at the damn world, maybe we wouldn’t have to rush,” I snapped right back and he hesitated to look at me.

“Oh no, Anastasia. Don’t you start with me,” he grated and I rolled my eyes.

“Well maybe I want to fucking start with you.” I pressed my lips together and he stepped out of the car. “Penelope?” I looked at her and she nodded her head. I stepped out of the car and walked up to Harry, “What the hell is wrong with you?” I yelled, pushing him a little.

“Me? What the hell is wrong with you? You got in the car and snapped on me for no goddamned reason.” He raked his fingers through his hair and I let out a breath.

“Please don’t be mad tonight. I don’t want to be pissed at you tonight.” I shook my head and he threw his hands up.

“Well don’t let that bitch piss me off!” He hollered, and I knew he was saying it loud enough for her to hear.

“Get in the damned car and shut your mouth,” I demanded and got back in the car.

Once he got in the car and started it, he turned on the radio and Smells Like Teen Spirit by Nirvana was playing on the radio, so he turned up the volume way louder than needed. And when Harry turned the music up louder, I began to sing along to it and I saw him raise his eyebrows. I got you now, Styles.

“It’s fun to lose and to pretend. She’s overbored, and self assured. Oh no, I know a dirty word,” I pretended to drum to the rhythm and he laughed at me, “With the lights out! It’s less dangerous! Here we are now! Entertain us! I feel stupid! And contagious! Here we are now! Entertain us!” And by then he turned the music down a little bit. “That’s what I thought,” I said and he laughed.

“Ana?” Penelope called me and Harry clenched his jaw, making me glare.

“Yeah?” I turned towards her and she sighed.

“I’m sorry for making you come tonight,” she muttered and I furrowed my brows.

“Why? This night isn’t over yet. I’m sure I’ll have fun,” I assured her and she gave me a small smile. When Harry pulled into the parking lot of Buffalo Wild WIngs, Penelope and Brazton got out first and I got out after Harry did.

“Penelope,” Harry called her and she froze where she stood. I could tell she was afraid, “Would you take Brazton and pick us out a table?” he smiled gently at her and she was just as shocked as I am.

“Um yeah.” Before she walked away, she grabbed my hand and said, “Thanks for calming him down. He’s gotten mad at me so many times before and it usually takes him 3 days to get over it. You made him get over it in 30 minutes.” She then nodded her head and Brazton followed her into the restaurant.

“So?” I asked, and he let out a breath, “Why didn’t you let me go in?”

“Well first of all, I want to ask you something,” he paused for effect, “Since when in the hell are you and Penelope best friends?”

“That’s simple,” I sang, pretending to not sound annoyed and he cocked an eyebrow. “Get this, you lied to me,” I sang again and smiled sarcastically, making him clench his jaw, “And instead of forgiving you, I forgave her. Funny how that works? Right?”

“But I thought you had forgiven me.” He grabbed my arm and I took a step back from him.

“We’ll see how this night goes and how many lies you’re going to tell tonight. Your limit is four.” I smiled and walked into the restaurant. I spotted Brazton and Penelope sitting at a booth and smiled at them.

When I sat down beside Brazton, he blushed and Harry came waltzing in, slipping his jacket off and throwing it down beside Penelope. When he slammed his body into the seat beside Penelope and glared at her, I kicked him and he glared at me instead. So I returned the favor and he looked down.

“What can I get you lovely couples to drink tonight?” A bubbly waitress walked up to us with a notepad and smiled.

“I’ll take a water,” Brazton ordered and Penelope ordered the same.

“I’ll have a Coke please.” I smiled gently and she wrote down the order.

“How about you?” She looked at Harry in a way that made me jealous, and I felt his eyes on me the whole time. He wasn’t paying attention to the smoking waitress with a nice ass beside him, he was paying attention to me.

“I’ll take a beer. Thank you.” I looked at him as he ordered, and he didn’t take his eyes off of me for one second.

“Alright. I’ll be right back to take your food order.” She smiled and walked away.

“So Brazton? What do you do for a living? If you even do anything.” Harry folded his fingers across each other and looked disgustingly at Brazton.

“I’m a mechanic during the week and I help out at the Bently University on the weekends.” He smiled and I looked at him.

“How do you help the University?” I shocked myself by being intrigued.

“I teach the daycare down the road, and I help in the kitchen at the University.” He smiled at me and I smiled back.

“So you know how to work on cars, aye?” Harry tried to hide his angry smile, and I giggled a little. Oh the tension. It’s just so… Just so beautiful.

“I’ve been working on cars since I was ten. I couldn’t get the job when I was sixteen because they thought I was too young. But now that I’m eighteen, they gave me the job and I’m pretty happy with it.” I smiled at him and Harry’s eyes burned right through my skin.

“Harry knows a lot about cars too,” Penelope chimed in and we all looked at her, “Anastasia hit a tree and the engine blew so I called Harry to come fix it.”

“That’s great. Maybe I can teach you a few things one day.” Brazton laughed a little and Harry gave a sarcastic laugh.

“Bitch I’ve been working on cars ever since you were in the womb,” Harry snapped and I growled at him. When the waitress walked up and handed him his beer, he yanked it from her and took a large gulp. “I’m going to need about three more of these,” he stated and she nodded her head.

“Well I think it’s great you know a lot of things about cars. Maybe you can teach me?” I said to Brazton and Harry cleared his throat.

“I’d love to teach you, Anastasia.” He smiled at me and I patted his hand.

“Well good luck trying to teach her anything. She’ll just roll her eyes and insist that she was right the first damn time,” Harry mumbled, and he thought that nobody heard him, but oh, I did.

“If you’re going to say something, you might as well say it a little louder,” I crossed my arms and he snapped his head towards me, “Unless it’s a lie. Because then I wouldn’t even bother wasting your time.”

“Fuck you, Anastasia!” He yelled at the top of his lungs and stormed out of the restaurant. Then everyone in the restaurant looked at our table.

“Ana. M-Maybe you should go check on him,” Penelope stuttered and then nodded her head. I slid out of the booth and stormed outside after Harry.

“Don’t you get in that fucking car,” I snapped and he glared at me once he reached his car.

“Why are you talking to me? Aren’t you afraid that I’ll lie?” he mocked and I sighed.

“Yes. Yes I am afraid that you’ll lie to me. My trust for you has been shaved and beat down in so many damned places that I can’t even keep up with anyone else’s,” I replied back to him and he slumped a little.

“Dammit Ana. I didn’t want to lie to you. Okay?” he walked towards me until he was looking right down at me. I was too pissed to even move or walk away, “I just want you trust me. I want you to be able to make a promise to you, and I want that promise to be so goddamned strong that it will be all that you want.”

“If you want that so bad, then make it that way. It’s your choice,” I muttered and he licked his bottom lip.

“I want to be able to hold you again. Fuck, I crave you so bad. I crave your touch. When you pulled your hand from mine earlier, I almost screamed out because the skin contact was so mesmerizing. I want to be able to have that every day.” He stepped closer to me.

“Harry. You have to remember, it’s your fault that you don’t have that.” My voice cracked and I realized that I was crying.

He put his hands on my cheeks and my heart fluttered, my knees almost giving out, “I want to be able to kiss you. And I want you to want me to kiss you.”

“We can’t kiss…” I whispered and he dropped one of his hands.

“Well if we can’t kiss, by God I am going to touch you every single chance I get. I can’t live without you Anastasia. You know that.” He pressed his lips together and I fidgeted.

“Well all that I knew was a lie, so maybe that’s all I know now.” I looked at him and he lolled his head back.

“You have no idea how badly I want to hold you, and apologize to you,” he whispered and I darted my eyes around his face.

“What’s stopping you from apologizing?” I asked, more tears falling from my eyes.

“I… Don’t know.” He shook his head and I cried out, “Don’t do that. Please. I hate to see you cry. Anastasia,” he said my name so desperately that I cried harder. “Ana.” He placed a lingering kiss on my forehead and I grabbed a hold of his hand, “Please stop crying. I don’t want you to cry.” I shook my head and wouldn’t stop crying.

“Please,” he whispered and kissed my chin, “You don’t have a reason to cry; you don’t need to cry anymore.” He locked eyes with my flooding ones and swallowed, “You don’t need to cry bébé. I love you.” His lips were so close to mine that I felt my bottom lip grazing his every time it trembled. Then he was just about to press his lips to mine...

“Hey. I was just coming to check on you.” Brazton appeared outside and Harry pulled away from me and yanked his fingers through his hair.

“Yeah okay.” Harry’s voice cracked, “Let’s all go back into the fucking restaurant and talk about you’re amazing fucking life.” He walked up to Brazton and I tensed, “Why not learn more about the fuck head who’s on a date with my girl? Nah, nevermind… I’ll shoot myself before I ever listen to this dick.” But then he began to ramble on about how stupid Brazton was as he entered the restaurant.

“Are you okay?” Brazton asked and I nodded my head.

“I’m fine. Let’s just go inside.” I walked with Brazton into the restaurant, not prepared for anything that was about to happen.

Notes

11 more chapters until 61 which means brand new chapters! OMG THIS HIT PAGE ONE ON THE MOST POPULAR AHH!!

Next update is in Sinister World. Hopefully.


I love you guys,
Kal xx