I stepped off the last stair leading up to the lounge. I knew that my face was still a bit red and I was fighting the urge to cry still. I couldn't believe what I had just done. What I made my girl do. I knew it was a horrible idea. I knew that I should've hung up when she gave the promise to call in the morning. I knew that this would end terribly. Would she still call me in the morning? Would she even want to speak to me after that? I felt as though I was as bad a man as Charles.
When I reached the main lounge, Louis looked at me curiously. He also seemed a bit worried. But no one said a word to me. I turned to the fridge to get a bottle of water. I stopped when I saw my reflection in the bus window. I looked like shit. My hair was a mess from trying to control myself, my face was redder than I thought from crying, my eyes were dilated and I appeared just miserable. What had I done to myself? To Enola. The sound of her silence sounded like a bomb to me. I squeezed my eyes shut tight. Trying to rid my ears of the sound of her body giving into Charles.
"Hey, we're stopping. Guys wanna get some fresh air?" Paul asked me, Louis and Liam with a smile. The bus came to a stop and before Louis or Liam could even get up from the sofa, I was pushing past Paul to get out the door. I felt like I couldn't breathe and the bus was closing in on me. I was out the door before anyone could ask me what the problem was.
I walked to the edge of the parking lot and stared out over the field. I gripped my hair tightly and tried to keep from making any sound as a sob shook me. What had I done? What had I fucking done? I bent over, holding myself up on my knees as nausea took over my body again. Ragged breaths falling from my mouth as I cried uncontrollably. What was I thinking? Not just about the events of the last hour but about the entire thing with Enola. Hearing her with Charles made me think of everything that her and I had talked about. I was questioning everything. She said that she didn't like being with him but the way she sounded made me feel differently. But she was crying, she didn't sound like she was enjoying it the way she did with me. Also, I heard the way she moaned for him and said his name. It was involuntary. She couldn't control the signals her body was sending to her brain. Just because she got off didn't mean that she wanted it or liked it. Mostly she sounded like she was in pain. I fell apart even more. Why didn't I do anything? Why didn't I take my phone off mute and yell at him? Why didn't I hang up and call Katy to go get her? I should've done something. I heard the way he smacked her. Granted from the sound it was just her rear but still, she didn't need to be manhandled in that way. I heard the way she gasped like she couldn't breathe, and not in the way that I took her breath away. I could hear how hard he was thrusting into her. He hurt her. He was hurting her on purpose to gratify himself . What kind of man was I for not doing something to stop it?
Another sob wracked my body when I felt a hand on my back. I glanced up for a moment to see Niall at my side. I quickly turned my face and wiped the tears from my cheeks.
"Harry, are you alright?" Niall sounded so concerned. I just shook my head. "Well, I'm not going to tell Enola that. She called and asked me to check on you. What's going on?" Niall asked rubbing my back to soothe me. I shook my head again. "Harry, did you guys get into a fight? She sounded like she was crying really hard." I titled my head back to look at the clear sky. The sky looked like a crystalline blue, nearly the same color as Enola's eyes. I closed my eyes tightly and fought off more tears. All I could picture in my head were her crying, embarrassed eyes. "Harry, come on. She really worried about you. She was a mess but all she could ask was that I make sure that you're alright. Why didn't you answer your phone for her?" Niall asked me.
"I broke it. I got super pissed and smashed it." I panted letting the tears fall all over again. Niall's eyes saddened even more as he slung his arm over my shaking shoulders. "I should've listened to her when she said she had to hang up. I should've listened." I stated, basically scolding myself. Niall tried to comfort me more by gripping my bicep firmly. "Enola is going to hate me now. She's going to leave me because I'm a jealous jerk. I should've listened when she said that he was home. I should've known when I heard him say he'd had a lot to drink." I cried.
"Harry, just tell me what happened." Niall pleaded. I knew he only asked so he knew what to say to make me feel better. I knew he only wanted to help.
"No. I can't tell you. I can't make this horrible situation even worse. I'm sorry. I can't." I inhaled slowly trying to calm myself. I needed to call Enola back.
"Harry, I'm sure she doesn't hate you. She wouldn't have called me crying and asking if you were okay. And I know for a fact that she is not going to leave you. She loves you too much. It'll be okay if you just call her and talk about it." Niall assured me before handing me his phone. "Just call." Before I could dial her again. The phone vibrated in my hand. I gave it back to Niall. It wasn't my business to read his texts. Niall sighed quietly, "It's E." I nodded and waited for him to say more. "She can't talk tonight. Charles is being a jerk still." Niall frowned as he read me the message. "She said to tell you Paris in two weeks."
"YES!" I shouted at him. I didn't care what she wanted to do there or where she wanted to stay. I would be there for her in Paris.
Niall smiled, "She must've called Paul too. We've got a show and three days off there."
"Tell her I said yes. I'll meet her anywhere. I'll do anything." I begged Niall.
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