Harry held my hand tightly as we walked around the backstage area. I was silent but he was telling me what everyone around us was doing. What needed to be done before they could go on stage. I listened intently to everything he had to say. It took my mind off the things that Louis had said. If I loved Harry, how could I stick around? I knew that something bad was bound to happen. How was he supposed to trust me? When I left him I would return home only to tell my husband a massive amount of lies about my trip, what I was doing, who I had been with. How was Harry supposed to believe a single word that came out of my mouth? I furrowed my brow as I thought about it more. I wasn't any good for the curly headed, emerald eyed, loving man holding my hand so tightly.
"Enola, stop thinking about it." Harry murmured into my ear. I looked up at him with startled eyes. I lifted my eyebrow at him. He smirked and held up our intertwined hands, "You're rubbing my knuckles again." I couldn't help but smile at him. "Noli, everything will be okay. I promise. I love you and I'm not going anywhere." He stated turning to me. He wrapped his arms around my shoulders, pulling me into a hug. "Louis can say what he wants. He doesn't feel this." Harry whispered holding me even closer. I let my eyes slide closed as my head fell to his chest.
"I'm sorry, Harry." I breathed, still feeling so guilty for keep the truth from him. "I love you. I never want to hurt you." I added locking my wrists at the small of his back.
"I love you, Noli. We can make it through this. I know we can. Pretty soon, it will be like you were never married and we can get on with life." Harry assured me. I nodded against his chest. "I know that it's going to take some time but I promise that I will be patient."
I gazed up at him sadly, "You're not going to be jealous? When I leave here I am going to go back to him. I have to."
Harry smiled, "Not at all. I know that I am the one you're in love with. I know I am the one you want to be with. We can do this." I still gazed at him skeptically. Jealousy was an emotion that we had no control over. He couldn't promise something like that. Harry buried a hand in my hair, pulling my face closer to his, "Enola Grace, I love you. I promise I will never once be jealous." I didn't want to agree with what he said. I knew that was a promise he wasn't going to be able to keep. Instead of saying anything at all, I pressed my lips to his lightly. Harry went right along with it. His lips returned the tender gesture with just as much love and gentleness.
I smiled when I heard Harry laughing and joking with Lou, their stylist. I kept my eyes on my book though. I didn't really want to draw attention to myself. I had had enough of dealing with Louis' mouth for the day. I figured it was just best to stay out of his way. I turned my eyes to my left when I felt someone sit next to me. I dropped my eyes to my book quickly, seeing Eleanor sitting next to me.
"Listen, I know that today has been rough, for all of us." Eleanor began. I didn't move. I didn't speak. "I don't agree with the way Louis spoke to you." She stated quietly. "But you have to understand that the boys are like brothers, they love each other very much. Louis is worried and hurt. He's hurting for Harry, you know?" Eleanor spoke plainly.
"I know that. That's why I didn't react to Louis the way I wanted to. I know how much Harry loves him and the other boys. I am trying to be civil. I'm not one for biting my tongue but I am doing so for Harry's sake. I love him and I don't want to cause a ruckus in his life." I sighed heavily, "Which I've obviously already failed miserably at." Eleanor placed her hand on my back in a soothing manner. I looked at her with a shocked expression, "Why are you comforting me? You shouldn't like me at all."
Eleanor spoke softly to me, "Because I can see how much guilt you feel." She smiled warmly and giggled quietly, "And Harry is right, you are a very likable person." Eleanor's gentle touch turned into a warm hug. I flicked my eyes over to Harry when Eleanor released me. He was smiling brightly at me as Lou blow dried his hair. I smiled back at him weakly.
"Making friends with El still?" Harry inquired, sitting down beside me. I lifted my eyes from my book and nodded slowly. "What did you guys talk about?"
"How Louis is just being your protective big brother. And I should try to see this through his eyes and try to not be angry with him." I answered calmly. Harry looked at me with a lifted eyebrow. "I was never upset with Louis. He has a right to feel the way he does. He's your best friend."
"But that doesn't mean he can speak to you the way he did." Harry grumbled.
I chuckled, "Harry, I've been spoken to in a much worse manner over a much smaller situation. It's alright."
Harry frowned deeply and shook his head, "It's not alright. You're better than that."
"Which part are you talking about?" I inquired softly. Harry frowned even more and rested his forehead against my temple. I wrapped my arm around his shoulders as he slid down the back of the sofa. After another moment, his head was resting on my chest and he was looking at my book. I giggled quietly and started to stroke his hair in the same soothing way I did when we were in bed.
"What is your book about?" Harry asked trying to avoid a silence.
"It's about a couple living in Paris during the second world war. It's quite romantic actually. He's got a vision of a better world and she's so taken with him that she follows him into the underground movement and ends up just as much involved in the cause as he is." I recounted the story in a simpler version.
Harry smiled, "You like it?"
I shrugged, "Yeah, it's holding my interest. I've not given up on it. In the last few months I've given up on a few novels."
"Will you read this one to me? I don't care where you're at. I just want to listen to you speak." Harry asked shyly. I nodded and began reading from where I had left off.
"Noli?" Harry's voice was just above a whisper. I looked down at his beautiful face that was now resting in my lap. "Is he attractive? Charles? Is he a good looking man?" I was taken aback by the question. He was probably asking because in the book, the main character was describing her newest friend and comrade.
I shrugged, "He is, I guess."
Harry gazed up at me with a cocked eyebrow, "What does he look like?" I was uncomfortable again. I didn't want to talk about Charles with Harry again. And I certainly didn't want to talk to Harry about Charles when all of Harry's friends were looking on.
"He's tall, six foot four. His eyes are brown. He's got really dark, jet black hair. He styles it a lot like Liam does his hair. He's quite muscled and I'm not really a fan of it." I answered quietly.
"Do you have a picture of him?" Harry seemed a bit nervous himself now. I nodded and took my phone from my pocket. I swiped through my photos quickly to find one of Charles for Harry. After just a second, I handed Harry the phone. He examined the picture thoroughly then looked up at me. "He looks like he could take the entire Manchester football team. That guy is huge."
"Yeah, that's what it looks like." I replied smugly. Harry chuckled and shook his head. I kissed Harry's lips lightly when he started to blush. We had both noticed that the boys were listening to us talk. Harry nodded and returned his head to my lap. Once again, I wondered why Harry’s thoughts led him to Charles. Why did he want to know what Charles looked like? Why did it matter to him?