VALERIE’S POV

These days at work are so damn boring. I hate all the paperwork and the future plans. Apparently the movie is going to be launched the 23rd of January which means we are starting the press conference in Australia the 10th. The lads are going to be on tour by that time in Oceania and Asia as well and I’m going to be shooting so I guess I’ll take a flight or something.
I can’t believe it’s already Wednesday. As the director keeps throwing bullshit to us, I allow myself to daydream remembering yesterday.
Harry came to set when he was done with his work and he waited for me watching bits of the movie that the crew showed to him. When we were off he asked me whether I was too tired to do anything and I told him I wasn’t. Really, I was but I wanted to hang out with him. He drove us to a Golf Club and I was too surprised to hide it.

-So we are playing golf. – I told him when he got next to me after getting out of his car.

-Nope. The club is already closed but if you want we can play any other day. Are you good at it?

-Not at all. I’m terrible. – I remember I hugged him just to take his scent in.

It plays in my mind like a movie. The way he took the blanket out of his bag and the way he placed it on the grass, way too focus to look at me. Then he displayed some dishes with food in the middle of the blanket and looked at me smiling sheepishly. We had a laid back dinner chatting about everything and I felt my heart beating. At some point we talked about my life in London and I realized Douglas was nothing to me anymore. I was so ready to be his friend it was crazy. I’m sure Harry is still having no idea how hard I’ve fallen for him. Nicholson brings me back to reality telling us we are done and I go hurrying up home, remembering tonight is Josh’s birthday and that Harry is picking me up in forty minutes.

I get home and have the quickest shower of all times to do my makeup before deciding which dress I’m wearing. I get on my lace underwear and try to decide the dress placing the dresses over my body to see which one to choose. I am really not thinking about the dresses.

I can’t get yesterday night out of my head. We made love for hours yesterday and I know we were both trying to take everything of the other, knowing it was going to be one of the last times. My chest hurts badly every time I think about it so I try not to and I know it’s the same for Harry.

I look at myself in the mirror and shudder when I see Harry through the mirror looking at me at the door. He wears a white shirt and black jeans and looks at me sternly. When our gazes cross he smiles timidly and gets inside my room.

-You are beautiful in that dress, Valerie. – His voice sounds down and low.

I feel my face instantly turns into a worried expression and as soon as I turn around Harry pulls me in for a hug. He hugs me as tight as if he was saying goodbye and I hug him confused. I feel his flashing breath and a droplet falls on my shoulder. I can’t believe he is crying? I caress his hair and sigh not knowing what to do. I pull out from our embrace and search for his face whilst he stays in the same position. As soon as I find his face I see he was indeed crying and I kiss him trying to comfort him. He kisses me back wildly and hard, practically devouring my mouth and I try to reciprocate but I’m way too confused. When he pulls out he rests his forehead on mine and reaches for something he has left on my bed.

-This is my gift for Josh. I don’t feel like going to the party. – He doesn’t even look at me.

He walks pass me and goes to my desk where he picks up some things he left here for whenever he was staying over.

-What are you talking about? Why are you not coming? Harry, what’s wrong? – He doesn’t reply. – Harry! – I beg for an explanation.

-There is nothing wrong, Valerie. I just need to go. – He stares sternly at me. – I’m leaving you; we are done. Our fake story is done and acting like everything is normal is done. I’m not going to go to a birthday party as your boyfriend when I am not so. – He passes me again and gets closer to the door but I stop him.

-Harry, Harry – I sound way too desperate but I don’t give a shit. – Harry, wait. – He stops and turns around to look at me and his eyes are red from crying. – Why? We said we were going to live the month of our story without worrying about how it was going to end and we still have four days. – I am gripping his wrists while he looks at me.

-Well maybe – his voice cracks and the teardrops roll on his cheeks – maybe, Valerie, I’m not a Pakistani butterfly, Valerie. I’m not. And I can’t remain waiting with crossed arms until the break up explodes at my face and you walk away, I can’t. – The tears roll through his cheeks while he talks calmly to me. – I can’t stick around you dreaming with being someone I’m not. I can’t pretend to be your boyfriend anymore, Valerie.

-You are not pretending, Harry. – I try to convince him. – You are playing your roll; you are my boyfriend, baby.

-No, Valerie, I’m not.

-Yes, you are. You have earned that. You are my boyfriend now because I want you to and I want you to come to the party with me. I love you, Harry.

-Valerie, you are leaving me in four days and I don’t want you to. I am not going to the party.

He is not crying anymore and he is smirking trying to convince me about his decision. He places his hand on my cheek and looks at me smiling sweetly. I press his hand against my face placing my hand on top of his and then I kiss his hand.

-I love you and... I don’t know what’s going to happen in four days, Harry. All I know is I love you too much to let you go whilst I can be with you so... if you don’t want to go to Josh’s birthday party, we won’t but don’t ask me to stay away from you because I am not going to.

I dry his teardrops and kiss his lips. I am afraid he is not going to reciprocate but after a few seconds he presses his lips against mine sweetly and we move our lips in sync in a sweet kiss without tongue. When we pull out he rests his forehead on mine and he sighs. I kiss him again, making sure I take his taste in, afraid of this being our last kiss.

Eventually I get him to come to Josh party but I don’t think we are going to be here for too long. I just want him to take me home and make love all night long. We have been holding hands or hugging each other all night without getting apart from each other not even for a minute, but when I ask him to take me home he says he is having a really good time and that he wants me to have fun too. We have a few drinks and we both end up kind of tipsy. I steal two reds liquorice wheels and make sure they have a whole in the middle before I insist for him to take me home. He smiles and nods agreeing with me about the two of us having way more fun alone.

When we get to my place, I lock ourselves in my room and I take Harry to my balcony. He smiles at me thinking most likely that this is some sort of sexual fantasy of mine.
-Regarding to what happened before – I start and he tries to interrupt me but I place my fingers on his lips. – Do you think it is not hard for me? Harry, I have told you so many times I am in love with you.

He caresses my face and places his fingers on my lips for me to shut up, copying my gesture from before.

-You might be in love with me, but I’m deeper, that’s for sure. I just want you to give me a chance, Val.

-If you want to keep on with this relationship, we can try. – He looks sternly at me. – I just didn’t want us to ruin this month. Harry, I have already told you that you don’t think straight now but it is obviously not going to work.

-Why not, Val? Why is it so obvious to you?

Because, Harry. Because we are going to be so far away you are not even going to notice I am still alive. Because I won’t be able to give you any physical contact and you will need it. Because you are not going to bare how enthusiast I am about my job. Because you will end up getting tired, because you will meet a model and forget about me. Because I was going to get married with someone who cheated on me and you are most likely going to do the same. Because, Harry, just because.

-Because we are busy people with busy lives and we are not seeing each other in so long and we are both famous and we meet new people every day. – Great, we have ended up fighting. I sigh and try to calm myself down. – You will meet a prettier girl as soon as you get to London, Harry and then what?

-What are you talking about? Valerie, I am in love with you not with that prettier nonexistent girl. I love you not those other girls. Why can’t you understand that?

I kiss him not wanting to talk about Douglas and about all of that shit and he kisses me back. He lays me on my white stack of pillows and hops on top of me and we kiss long and sweetly. He kisses my jaw line and my neck telling me he loves me between kiss and kiss and I moan at his tenderness and tell him I love him more.

He takes off my dress and underwear and tells me how beautiful he thinks I am and keeps on kissing my entire body and then he kisses my sex. I hiss when his sweet tongue caresses my clit and I pull him up grabbing him by his shoulders and kiss his lips hungrily.

-Make love to me, Harry. – I whisper in his ear before I kiss and suck his neck.

As I did so he places himself at my entrance and thrusts himself inside me, driving me crazy. We both moan and try to catch our breaths breathing heavily at each other’s ears. I kiss him when I can and he does the same with my skin and we both moan or growl to get this unbearable pleasure out of our systems. Harry Styles should be illegal.

We reach our climax together and he places his head on the crook of my neck, catching his breath while I caress his hair.

-Valerie – I hum for him to continue – you are the best thing I have ever had.

That makes my heart skips a beat since no one has ever told me something like that. He has everything he can possibly wish and he thinks I am the best thing he has. That’s beautiful. I’m feeling my heart even more filled with love even when I thought that was impossible. My heart might explode tonight.

-I have something for you. – I remember the liquorice wheels I got from the party.

-Do you?

He smiles at me and I am glad he is in his happy mood again. I get up from the tank of pillows completely naked and put on his shirt without button it and my undies, heading towards the bed where I left my bag. When I come back with the liquorice wheels on my fists, he is smiling amused looking at me.

-You have a beautiful arse, you know?

He smiles smugly at me, his arms folded beneath his head, his body lying on the stack of pillows. I give him a grimace. I sit down on his hips and then I take his hand and give him a liquorice wheel and he chuckles when he realizes what I have just given him.
-Thank you, baby. – He says chuckling and I smile.

-Actually, that’s for me. – He raises his brows surprised and this time it’s me who chuckles. – This is yours though.

I take his other hand and put the liquorice wheel as a ring on his ring finger. He smiles looking at his new ring and then he looks at me.

-I want you to know it doesn’t matter what we are doing on Monday or for the rest of our lives. We will always have this month and I will always remember the way you make me feel. I love you so much I need my every sense gets filled with you. So this is yours – I touch his new ring – just as I am.

He grips my hair and pulls me in for a kiss. We kiss tenderly and sweetly and I smile at his lips when he tries to prolong our kiss. When we pull out I look into his eyes smiling happy that he is in a good mood again. He takes my hand and plays with my fingers. Then he puts the liquorice wheel on my ring finger and I smile at it.

-I love you. – He says looking at me.

-Why? – I tell him burning my eyes into his.

-Because I do.

He doesn’t doubt and I smile at his simplicity. I don’t know if I want something more elaborated but I don’t want cheesiness so this might be good enough.

–I love you because of what I feel whenever you smile at me and because I find myself smiling like an idiot whenever you call my name. I love you because you wrinkle your nose when you don’t like the smell of something and because you leave the peas to the end at lunch. I love you because you have a thousand pillows on your bed and because you don’t give a damn about anything. I love you because when I look into your eyes I feel like there are only two people in the world.

I smile widely at him and he chuckles somewhat embarrassed. I kiss him sweetly and lean on him and he kisses me slowly. We kiss long and sweetly and I am afraid I’m dying for what he is making me feel.

-Dance with me. – I tell him excitedly.

-There is no music playing. – He chuckles.

-So? I get up and play Planet Earth by Barrie Gledden on my phone. I lend my hand to him smiling and he takes it chuckling and shaking his head. He pulls me towards him and we dance on our underwear hugging each other. I feel the skin of his bare legs and place my hands on his bare chest while he places his hands on the low of my back and I feel the heat of his hands through the thin fabric of his white shirt. I rest my head on the crook of his neck and we dance in silence.

“Maybe everything is right with the world it’s just that we can’t get over it”. -I also love you for things like this.

He rests his chin on my head and after a few minutes he hugs me tighter, resting his chin on my shoulder and I search for his face and kiss him. He kisses me tenderly but hungrily and when he pulls out he burns his eyes into mine intently.

Then Harry unbuttons my shirt kissing me and pulls out to take my shirt off looking right into my eyes. Neither of us is smiling. I’m just trying to figure out how could he be this beautiful and how on Earth can I love him this much. As I look into his eyes I feel how my heart even hurts and I realize I have never loved anyone this hard.

He kisses me hungrily and feverishly and I reciprocate as eager as him. I trace my way from his lips to his belly kissing her chest and I sit down on the bed to take his boxers off. I look up at him and smile holding the hem of his boxers and he smiles widely back at me and lets out a chuckle bending over me to kiss my lips. We kiss while I take off his boxers and then he grabs me by my elbows and makes me stand up. Harry kisses me while he takes my panties off.

He sits down on the stack of pillows, sitting me down on top of him and we kiss each other lovingly, trying to eat each other’s mouth with our lips, caressing each other’s back. We pull out from our kiss and look into each other’s eyes and caress each other’s faces tracing the outline of our noses or the lips with our fingertips, just admiring the other and trying to take all of the other in.

I caress Harry’s chest getting closer to his sex and he devours my mouth eagerly. He hops me on top of him, adjusting himself at my entrance and I move my hips so that he gets inside of me. I ride him and he remains sitting as we can’t quit kissing each other so we make love sitting on the bed, devouring each other. He holds me close to him when I shiver on top of him, completely undone at my climax and he growls just by staring at me. He takes advantage of my position, sitting on top of him with my head thrown back from pleasure, to kiss and suck my nipples, which only drives me crazier and I moan louder, tangling my fingers with his hair. I think I’m going insane.

I stay on top of him trying to catch my breath until I stand up and pull him up with me to go to my bed. We lay down on my bed catching our breath and he holds me closer to him so I rest my head on his chest while he caresses my back. I peck his chest.

-When did you realize you were in love with me? – He asks me.

I take a few seconds caressing his belly before I open my mouth.

-Do you remember when I had this headache and you came to pick me up from set? – He hums. – When I was opening my door, you were right after me waiting for me to open it. I was feeling your body behind me just there, pleasantly waiting and, for some reason, I found myself wanting to feel that every single time I opened the door. That’s when I knew I was in love with you.

I smile looking at him and he smiles widely. I rest my forehead on his chest again and trace the inked bay leaves at his hips with my fingertips.

-When did you? – I ask him.

-I have been feeling weird around you since the first night you laid your head on my shoulder in the car in your way home and then, do you remember All we do is win? – I chuckle at the memory. – Well, you got up on a table to dance and I looked at every single of your movements – he pauses and I wait for him to talk tracing his tattoos with my fingerprints – and then I knew it when I held your hand to help you get off. I knew it because I thought: That’s it.

-We had not even kissed by that time, had we? – I look at him like an idiot.

-We had not. The first time we kissed was on your party after the premier we went together.

-I know. The 27th of June.

-Really? – He chuckles. – Do you write those things down?

-I mean I remember them. – I smile at him.

-You are – he searches for my mouth and kisses my lips – cute. – He says against my lips.

We talk and talk about this and that cuddling in my bed and all I can think about is whether anybody can stop the clocks. I am seriously considering keeping a real relationship with this man I love so much.

Notes

Hope you liked it! Thanks for reading, guys!