This Is Us
05. Repeated Mistakes
3:07 a.m.
Jana’s POV
‘’Shh, baby.. Mommy’s got you.’’ I whisper to Tiffany, trying to get her to quiet down some. She was screaming like crazy, and to be honest I’m not really used to getting up at night for her, Niall usually does, for all of the kids, unless it’s what we call a ‘double call’, two kids screaming at once you know.
“I got you love.’’ I mumble lightly as I rock her in my arms while sitting in the rocking chair in her room, which was right beside ours. She was quieting down some, thankfully. Her eyes were slowly starting to close and I knew soon that she’d be passed out.
At the moment, Niall was at the hospital with Tori. He called me and told me everything, he didn’t tell me why he left so early though, but don’t worry.. I got caught up with the situation, and I’m not too happy myself. I would rather have anything happen to my kids other than them repeating my teen years.
I got pregnant with Tori when I was only fourteen, had her a few months after I turned fifteen, which makes me sick at times to think it. Because if I weren’t such a teenager at the time I might be normal for once. But then again, I know that if I never had Tori, I would have never meet Niall and none of this would exist.
So that’s the only happy thing from my young life, Tori… and meeting Niall. All I want is for Tori to be happy, and I know that her and that boy are ‘in love’, or so they think, but I just don’t want her to make the same mistakes as I did.
Because I know where it leads to, the harsh things from strangers, the family members wanting nothing to do with you, but I’m sure that won’t ever happen to her.
And worst of all, something I didn’t have to deal with when I had her, the public eye. If they saw that Niall Horan’s daughter made a huge mistake, then the media would never let it go. And at times that scares me, because I’m afraid she might screw up something so easy and the world will go insane.
I hate thinking that though.
Niall’s POV
My mind was racing, I was so into my thoughts at the moment. I didn’t care what happened to Tori, I was just expecting the worst, despite hoping for the best. And when I say I don’t care, I mean the whole sex thing.
Whatever, it doesn’t matter. Its just that I’m afraid…. things will come from this, several things are possible. And it haunts me, scares me. And now, one of those things might come true, or more than one.
‘’Tori, sweetheart.’’ I heard a nurse say. I look to see her standing there, a slight smile on her face as she holds a clipboard in her hand. ‘’Yes?’’ Tori asks as she fiddles with her fingers in her lap, but her eyes on the nurse. ‘’I’m sure at your age.. that this wasn’t planned, but um.’’ The nurse stops and glances over at me.
She gives me a gaze for a few moments before looking back at Tori. ‘’Tori, you’re.. uh, well, um.. pregnant.’’ She states simply. ‘’What?’’ I ask, standing up, shocked out of my complete mind. ‘’The results came back, she’s clean of any sexual transmissions, but.. she’s pregnant.’’ She nurse says before turning on her heal and stepping out of the room.
I heard Tori gulp loudly as I just stood there, staring at her. ‘’All your mother and I asked from you was to not repeat our mistakes.. and.. and you did.’’ I whisper lightly, knowing that she heard me before she looked at me, biting her bottom lip hard, she only does that when she’s afraid.
‘’Daddy.’’ She murmurs lightly. I don’t reply, I just stare at her as she looks at me with pleading eyes. ‘’I’m sorry.’’ She sighs lightly, a tear rolling down her cheek. I sigh, knowing that I went too far with the screaming and fussing earlier, and I didn’t let her know that I cared either way, that was something she wanted right now, was for me to care for once.
‘’Babe.. it’s okay.’’ I whisper lightly as I step closer, standing beside the end of the bed where she sits, swinging her legs lightly as they dangle off the edge, a childish thing she never lost. ‘’No its not.. I’m.. I.’’ she just stops herself as she notices the few tears being released from her eyes.
‘’I don’t want it.’’ She blurts out, looking back at me, right into my eyes. I gulp slightly. I don’t care if I wanted this for her, or if she did, or if anyone did. There was a baby inside of her, and a baby is still a living thing. It’s a human, and you shouldn’t kill. So therefore, she’s keeping it.
‘’Baby, I love you. I really do. And I’d do anything for you, you know that. But.. not this. You done it to yourself, so you’re going to through with it.’’ I tell her truthfully as I grab her hand, squeezing it a little. She returns the favor before sighing out gently.
‘’Daddy.. I.. I.. I really am sorry.. I never meant.. for this to happen.. I just.. I.. you’re right, I’m a whore.’’ She mumbles to me. ‘’No baby, you’re not a whore. You’re just human, everyone makes mistakes. Some get more out of them than others, and in this case.. you’re getting a lot in return.’’ I tell her, trying to assure her that this was going to be okay, it’s all going to be okay.
Of course I was upset. One, because this was my baby, my daughter, my princess. Two, because she disobeyed me. Three, because this happened to her. And finally, because I knew there was nothing we could do that was civil and right. She’s going through with this, and the decision final.
‘’If I’m going to.. to.. to keep it.. then I want to.. keep it in the end.’’ She says. ‘’You are, don’t worry about that. Like I said, you done it to yourself. You are old enough to make your own decisions, and you decided to do things you shouldn’t be doing. And in response to this, God gave you basically what you were asking for.’’ I say as I bring her hand to my lips, kissing the top gently.
‘’I love you though, always will, always have, forever. But right now.. you need to realize.. how much you have to grow up in a matter of months.’’ I whisper as I release her hand. ‘’I’ll be right back.’’ I add before stepping past the curtains and out into the main room.
I walk over to the desk that sits in the middle of the large, large room. I sigh as I lean on the counter. ‘’Yes?’’ The woman asks me as she hangs up a phone she had in her hand. ‘’I um, wanted to know.. something about my daughter, if the test showed it.’’ I say.
‘’Okay, name please.’’ She says as she prepares her hands on the keyboard of her computer. ‘’Tori Horan.’’ I say and she nods as she types it in and I wait for what felt like completely forever. ‘’Ah, I just got done putting it into her records.. what would you like to know, sir?’’ She asks with a light smile as she looks up at me.
‘’Do you know.. how long she is?’’ I ask. ‘’Um, the test doesn’t show that. But we can do an ultrasound and be able to tell.’’ She suggests. ‘’Can we do that, please?’’ I ask. She nods lightly. ‘’I’ll inform the doctor.’’ She smiles lightly before I finally walk off.
My heart racing fast, my mind blown, and my thoughts all about Tori. I was so afraid, but not at the same time..
Jana’s POV
‘’Shh, baby.. Mommy’s got you.’’ I whisper to Tiffany, trying to get her to quiet down some. She was screaming like crazy, and to be honest I’m not really used to getting up at night for her, Niall usually does, for all of the kids, unless it’s what we call a ‘double call’, two kids screaming at once you know.
“I got you love.’’ I mumble lightly as I rock her in my arms while sitting in the rocking chair in her room, which was right beside ours. She was quieting down some, thankfully. Her eyes were slowly starting to close and I knew soon that she’d be passed out.
At the moment, Niall was at the hospital with Tori. He called me and told me everything, he didn’t tell me why he left so early though, but don’t worry.. I got caught up with the situation, and I’m not too happy myself. I would rather have anything happen to my kids other than them repeating my teen years.
I got pregnant with Tori when I was only fourteen, had her a few months after I turned fifteen, which makes me sick at times to think it. Because if I weren’t such a teenager at the time I might be normal for once. But then again, I know that if I never had Tori, I would have never meet Niall and none of this would exist.
So that’s the only happy thing from my young life, Tori… and meeting Niall. All I want is for Tori to be happy, and I know that her and that boy are ‘in love’, or so they think, but I just don’t want her to make the same mistakes as I did.
Because I know where it leads to, the harsh things from strangers, the family members wanting nothing to do with you, but I’m sure that won’t ever happen to her.
And worst of all, something I didn’t have to deal with when I had her, the public eye. If they saw that Niall Horan’s daughter made a huge mistake, then the media would never let it go. And at times that scares me, because I’m afraid she might screw up something so easy and the world will go insane.
I hate thinking that though.
Niall’s POV
My mind was racing, I was so into my thoughts at the moment. I didn’t care what happened to Tori, I was just expecting the worst, despite hoping for the best. And when I say I don’t care, I mean the whole sex thing.
Whatever, it doesn’t matter. Its just that I’m afraid…. things will come from this, several things are possible. And it haunts me, scares me. And now, one of those things might come true, or more than one.
‘’Tori, sweetheart.’’ I heard a nurse say. I look to see her standing there, a slight smile on her face as she holds a clipboard in her hand. ‘’Yes?’’ Tori asks as she fiddles with her fingers in her lap, but her eyes on the nurse. ‘’I’m sure at your age.. that this wasn’t planned, but um.’’ The nurse stops and glances over at me.
She gives me a gaze for a few moments before looking back at Tori. ‘’Tori, you’re.. uh, well, um.. pregnant.’’ She states simply. ‘’What?’’ I ask, standing up, shocked out of my complete mind. ‘’The results came back, she’s clean of any sexual transmissions, but.. she’s pregnant.’’ She nurse says before turning on her heal and stepping out of the room.
I heard Tori gulp loudly as I just stood there, staring at her. ‘’All your mother and I asked from you was to not repeat our mistakes.. and.. and you did.’’ I whisper lightly, knowing that she heard me before she looked at me, biting her bottom lip hard, she only does that when she’s afraid.
‘’Daddy.’’ She murmurs lightly. I don’t reply, I just stare at her as she looks at me with pleading eyes. ‘’I’m sorry.’’ She sighs lightly, a tear rolling down her cheek. I sigh, knowing that I went too far with the screaming and fussing earlier, and I didn’t let her know that I cared either way, that was something she wanted right now, was for me to care for once.
‘’Babe.. it’s okay.’’ I whisper lightly as I step closer, standing beside the end of the bed where she sits, swinging her legs lightly as they dangle off the edge, a childish thing she never lost. ‘’No its not.. I’m.. I.’’ she just stops herself as she notices the few tears being released from her eyes.
‘’I don’t want it.’’ She blurts out, looking back at me, right into my eyes. I gulp slightly. I don’t care if I wanted this for her, or if she did, or if anyone did. There was a baby inside of her, and a baby is still a living thing. It’s a human, and you shouldn’t kill. So therefore, she’s keeping it.
‘’Baby, I love you. I really do. And I’d do anything for you, you know that. But.. not this. You done it to yourself, so you’re going to through with it.’’ I tell her truthfully as I grab her hand, squeezing it a little. She returns the favor before sighing out gently.
‘’Daddy.. I.. I.. I really am sorry.. I never meant.. for this to happen.. I just.. I.. you’re right, I’m a whore.’’ She mumbles to me. ‘’No baby, you’re not a whore. You’re just human, everyone makes mistakes. Some get more out of them than others, and in this case.. you’re getting a lot in return.’’ I tell her, trying to assure her that this was going to be okay, it’s all going to be okay.
Of course I was upset. One, because this was my baby, my daughter, my princess. Two, because she disobeyed me. Three, because this happened to her. And finally, because I knew there was nothing we could do that was civil and right. She’s going through with this, and the decision final.
‘’If I’m going to.. to.. to keep it.. then I want to.. keep it in the end.’’ She says. ‘’You are, don’t worry about that. Like I said, you done it to yourself. You are old enough to make your own decisions, and you decided to do things you shouldn’t be doing. And in response to this, God gave you basically what you were asking for.’’ I say as I bring her hand to my lips, kissing the top gently.
‘’I love you though, always will, always have, forever. But right now.. you need to realize.. how much you have to grow up in a matter of months.’’ I whisper as I release her hand. ‘’I’ll be right back.’’ I add before stepping past the curtains and out into the main room.
I walk over to the desk that sits in the middle of the large, large room. I sigh as I lean on the counter. ‘’Yes?’’ The woman asks me as she hangs up a phone she had in her hand. ‘’I um, wanted to know.. something about my daughter, if the test showed it.’’ I say.
‘’Okay, name please.’’ She says as she prepares her hands on the keyboard of her computer. ‘’Tori Horan.’’ I say and she nods as she types it in and I wait for what felt like completely forever. ‘’Ah, I just got done putting it into her records.. what would you like to know, sir?’’ She asks with a light smile as she looks up at me.
‘’Do you know.. how long she is?’’ I ask. ‘’Um, the test doesn’t show that. But we can do an ultrasound and be able to tell.’’ She suggests. ‘’Can we do that, please?’’ I ask. She nods lightly. ‘’I’ll inform the doctor.’’ She smiles lightly before I finally walk off.
My heart racing fast, my mind blown, and my thoughts all about Tori. I was so afraid, but not at the same time..
Notes
First plot turn and cliff hanger!!! I will update SOON!!!!!!!!! Please comment those thoughts, love yall so much!!! xx ♥
Also, can you guys check out my new story????? Please! Love ya for it!! xx
http://www.onedirectionfanfiction.org/Story/76659/Through-His-Eyes/
--B
@samie_horan
His mom, remember it was a whole chapter about it before??
10/18/15