Beautiful Disaster

A constant, steady beeping filled my ears. The sound of feet hitting the floor, dragging. Muffled female voices discussing the latest episode of The Young and the Restless. The air I was breathing smelled clean, like disinfectant. My body felt stiff, as if I hadn't moved in years. Where the hell am I? My memory was hazy, and I couldn't really remember anything that happened before a few minutes ago. My eyelids were heavy, but I was able to force them open a little. My vision was kind of blurred, and that made it hard to see my surroundings. I blinked a few times, clearing the fog in my eyes. Looking around, I could now see that I was in a hospital room. Suddenly, a sharp pain shot through my left wrist and I winced in pain. Just then, I remembered everything.

I raised my arms, slow enough to not pull out the IV that was hooked into the crease of my right elbow, and examined the large, white gauze bandages that were wrapped around both of my wrists. I was feeling something that I knew all too well – guilt. I should only have cut to feel numbness, not cut to kill. Liam is going to hate me when he finds out. Then I'll have no one. I wiped the tears from my eyes before they had a chance to fall, then let my arms rest at my sides. I sighed heavily and sunk lower into the bed, closing my eyes. I'm all alone, not only in my current situation, but in life as well.

The door handle turned, startling me. I watched as Liam walked through the door with his head hung low. In his hand was a small bouquet of brightly colored flowers. I kept quiet as he walked right past me to put the new flowers in the vase on the windowsill and take the old ones out. I hadn't even noticed the glass vase until now. Liam turned around and glanced at my face, then looked away. Of course, once it registered in his mind that he had seen my eyes open, he turned his full attention back to me. “Cas!” he exclaimed as he ran over to my bedside. I blinked back the tears that were threatening to spill over onto my cheeks. With one hand, he carefully took one of mine. With the other, he smoothed down the hair on top of my head. Rather than being angry at me, he was showing sympathy. Yet I know that when I'm well again, I will catch hell from him. “I'm so glad you're awake,” he whispered. That was it. Those five words were all it took for me to break down in tears. My shoulders shook with each sob, and Liam pulled me into his arms to hold me.

“I'm so sorry,” I cried. I heard Liam sniffle, and that just made me feel worse about what I had done. Tears were streaming freely down my face and onto my brother's shirt, but he didn't seem to mind at all. As he held me and stroked my hair, Liam shushed me, telling me,

“Everything is going to be okay, I promise.” I heard the door creak open, then,

“Casper, you're awake!” I looked up to see a nurse in pink and purple polka-dotted scrubs looking rather surprised. Liam pulled away and gave me a slight smile before turning to face the nurse. “I'm paging Dr. Robinson now,” she said to Liam. Walking over to the other side of my bed, she asked me, “How are you feeling sweetheart?”

“I'm a bit tired,” I admitted. The nurse nodded as if she understood. “When can I leave?” I asked.

“Well, Dr. Robinson should be walking in anytime. It's up to him to decide when you are going to be released.” As if on cue, a tall man wearing a long, white coat walked in. I assumed he was the doctor. When he looked up from the clipboard in his hands, he looked just as shocked as the nurse did when she saw me.

“Look who's finally awake,” the doctor said with a smile. The nurse moved out of the way, and the doctor took her place. “Casper, I'm Dr. Robinson,” he said, “I saved your life.” I looked down at my wrists, bandaged so pretty, as if there were no fixed wounds beneath them. The room remained silent while Dr. Robinson took my vitals, then he said, “Everything looks good.”

“When do you think she'll be ready to be released?” Liam asked. The doctor smiled at me, then looked at Liam.

“I see no problem with her leaving within the next couple of days, as soon as we set her up with a therapist. There are obviously some things going on in her head that she needs to discuss with someone, or this might happen again. Only next time, we might not be so lucky,” Dr. Robinson said as he patted my shoulder.

After speaking with Liam and myself for a few more minutes, Dr. Robinson and the nurse left us to talk. Although, we didn't talk long on account of me falling asleep. Liam laughed and my eyes popped open. “What?” I asked.

“You need to rest,” he said as he leaned down and kissed my forehead. “I'll be back tomorrow.” I nodded, and as he walked out of the room, quietly shutting the door behind him, I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep.

Notes

First chapter, woot woot!

Oh my gosh, have you ever been in a relationship that didn't work? Then two years later, he comes back into your life, and you're just as in love as before? Yeah, that's what's happening to me <3

Anyway, comment and let me know if I should keep going!