No Control

It takes me most of the car ride to the airport to stop crying. Caroline rubs my back. She knows there are no words to comfort me. Her phone goes off and I look at her expectantly. “It’s Paddy asking how you are?” She says.
“Is Liam ok?” I ask.
She types on her phone and a moment later it goes off again. “It sounds like he’s about the same as you are sweetie.”
As we pull up to the airport I send Liam a text. “We’ve arrived at the airport. I love you.”
Liam writes back. “I love you babe.”
While we sit at the terminal waiting for our flight I look in my bag for a mirror to see how horrible I must look. Instead I find a note from Liam. As I pull it out of my bag I smell the intoxicating scent of Liam’s cologne. I close my eyes and breathe it in. Then I unfold it and begin to read.
“My Beautiful Liz,
You are the love of my life and the woman beyond all my dreams. You and I meeting was fate, becoming friends was a choice, but us falling in love was beyond our control. Being with you is pure happiness. I have never had anyone love me the way you do. And I have never loved anyone else the way I love you. I need you to know how beautiful you are in my eyes.
I will miss every perfect inch of you. These next few days will be so hard not waking up beside you. Just keep in mind love that when you get back I am going to show you exactly how much I love you.
Endlessly yours,
Liam
True Love Forever”

I refold the note, hold it against my heart and close my eyes. How is it that I can be so blessed to be loved by such an amazing man.
I take a picture of myself holding the note to my chest and I send it to Liam with a caption. “You took my breath away my love.”
Liam texts back. “Babe, you look so beautiful. Your eyes look so green. I miss you already. I love you.”
“They always turn very green when I cry. I miss you too.” I reply.
Liam writes back. “Please don’t cry love.”
“I’ll try. I love you.”
I put my phone away as we board our flight. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t think of not boarding that plane.

Notes