Change Me

Elena woke up the next morning happy, extremely happy even. She felt like a weight off her shoulder had been lifted. It was all because of yesterday with Harry.

Elena felt much closer to Harry after yesterday and she loved it. She really liked Harry, he could be a dick but when he was himself, like he was yesterday, she couldn’t help but let her feeling for him grow. They bubbled up inside her and even thinking about Harry turned her stomach into knots.

She shouldn’t be feeling like this for him though, she had Chase. Chase was good to her and was always there for her, without Chase there is no doubt in her mind that she wouldn’t be head girl. She wouldn’t have had half as many privileges as she had gotten if it weren’t for him and that’s why it was key to stay on his good side.

Elena hoped in the shower, washing her hair, before quickly hoping out and drying herself. She padded over to her draws, getting out her underwear and slipping it on. Fishing through her wardrobe, she pulled out her uniform, getting dressed and making sure it was done to perfection. She clipped her hair up into a loose bun before grabbing her bags and walking out of her dorm. She would usually meet Chase outside of his dorm building, so she waited outside for him.

Instead of seeing him though, she sees Harry walking out of the building, his uniform put on messily but on him it worked so well. His hair was tussled and pushed up, out of his face, showing off his features. His lips were pink, almost red, as his slick tongue glided across them.

Elena was about to speak to him, when he walked right past her, not even acknowledging her presence.

“Harry?” Elena calls and he turns around.

“What?” He replies, no emotion on his face whatsoever. His hands were shoved into the pockets of his pants as his feet kicked the rubble beneath his shoes.

“I-I… What’s wrong with you?” She stutters, taken aback by his attitude.

“Nothing’s wrong.” He mutters, looking up at the blonde.

“Then why are you acting like this? I thought we…“ She trails off, looking down at the ground.

“You thought we what, Elena?” He asks harshly, no remorse in his tone whatsoever.

“I just thought we’d gotten past this?” She asks, her tone sounding somewhat pleading.

“Gotten past what? Just because I talked to you yesterday doesn’t mean we’re best friends, Elena. I don’t see why you’re being so clingy with me.” He spits and Elena’s heart drops at his words. He shakes his head and turns around, continuing to walk to school. Elena finds herself following him – her pace now matching his. “What do you want now?” He growls, not bothering to look at the girl next to him.

“I want to know why you’re being such a dick. You were really nice yesterday and I finally thought we got somewhere. I thought you’d changed but now it looks like I was wrong.” She murmurs, her voice becoming quieter. Harry stops in his tracks, turning to face the blonde girl.

"Then why are you still here? I didn't ask you to do this, I didn't ask you to stay. I didn't ask you to try and change me." He roars, his temper wearing thin.

“I’m still here because I care about you, Harry. That’s the problem with you though; you push away anyone who actually gives a shit about you.” She croaks, tears pricking her eyes.

“Stop fucking crying.” He says through gritted teeth. Harry hated seeing people cry, especially when he was the one who caused it. Seeing Elena like this made his heart drop, knowing he was the cause of her tears and had been – countless times.

“Well, am I wrong?” She asks, a few stray tears gliding down her face.

“You don’t know anything about me, Elena.” He starts to walk off again but she grabs his arm.

“That’s the thing though, Harry. I do know a lot about you. I know that you’re insecure about yourself, you feel as if you need to be someone you’re not to impress people. I know you sleep

around because you don’t like commitment, you don’t like to be emotionally attached to anyone because you’re scared they’ll hurt you. I know that you push anyone away who tries to get close to you because you’re afraid to feel but that’s the thing I don’t know Harry. I don’t know why you do this to yourself.” She cries, and Harry looks down at her, his eyes scanning her delicate features. He regularly found himself thinking about her, every little thing about her. He pretended to hate the fact that Elena kept trying to knock down his walls, but deep down, he loved it. He loved knowing she cared, but he’d never admit that to anyone, he couldn’t even admit it to himself.

“Just leave me alone.” He mutters, pulling out of her grip and walking in the direction of school. Elena didn’t know how long she was stood there, watching his figure disappear into the schools building, but eventually she heard someone call her name from behind her.

“El!” Someone called, and she turned around to meet Chase’s gaze. Quickly, she wiped the tears from her eyes, hoping that it wouldn’t be noticeable to Chase that she had been crying.

“Oh, hey.” She weakly smiled as he pulled her in for a hug.

“Sorry I took so long, my alarm didn’t go off.” He grins and she nods.

“You okay?” He asks, looking down at her.

“Yeah, I just don’t feel well.” She looks up and he pouts.

“How about after school you come to my dorm and we can watch a film or something?” He asks and she forces out another smile, nodding.

“That would be great.” She croaks and he grins, leaning down and pecking her on the lips. He takes her hand in his as they walk towards school.

Girls weren’t allowed in boy’s dorms and vice-versa, but because Chase’s mother was the head, he could do whatever he wanted and get away with it. Mrs Green trusted them both and she was right to, Elena and Chase never did anything. Chase would always hint at it but Elena felt uncomfortable doing anything of the sort, she didn’t feel right doing that sort of stuff with him. It was weird because he was her boyfriend, she should feel comfortable around him after being with him for nearly 3 years, but she didn’t.

***

Throughout school, all Elena could think about was Harry. She’d glance over at him in the lessons they had together. Often, she found herself staring at him, entranced by him. Her eyes grazed over his imperfect features, his broad nose and plump lips. His thick eyebrows that knotted together over his moss-green eyes, eyes you could get lost in. His thick curls looked soft; she wanted to run her fingers through them, pushing them even more out of his face, so she could get an even clearer image of him.

She then found herself thinking about yesterday, thinking about how kind and gentle Harry was towards her. His smile made her heart flutter and his laugh left her speechless, his whole aura yesterday was nothing but joy. He was happy, he was himself with her. She swore she had passed his walls, but here she was, back to square one again.

And that’s when Elena realised that she honestly did care about Harry. She wanted to know what had scarred him, made him so closed off. She wanted to be someone he could trust, someone he actually cared for. She wanted to help him, to change him, and that’s just what she was going to do.