The Sass Account
I sat on the edge of the empty docks of the Pier, my flimsy jacket keeping me decently warm. I was so out of it earlier. I even let some fucking tears slip out. I don't know why I felt so emotional in that moment. My thoughts were muddled. I couldn't make sense of it. For some reason Louis came to mind, I was thinking of him in that moment, wondering what he was doing, who he was talking to. Have I officially lost my shit? Yes I have.
Why was I suddenly curious about him…it's not like I'm going to stalk his ass, he's got plenty of that already in his life.
But instead I have Troy. He's alright. Maybe he's not completely gay for Louis after all. I liked his bite. It was similar to mine. He explained he was Louis' buddy so I guess he knows him. Maybe he's in the industry, actor or failed headshot or something and Louis is off doing something else. I don't know, maybe Louis is having the time of his life somewhere great. Being as rich as he is, he wouldn't be wasting time at a beach, staring at his phone waiting for a stranger to reply back to his tweets. Celebrities are busy people, actually doing things, unlike normal folks waiting for things to come to them.
That moron gets tweets every day, every fucking second, why would my replies matter? He's too famous, he just, he's so far gone. He's too sucked into his own fantasy of being Louis Tomlinson he cannot be saved. He even admits to reading fan fictions about himself. Maybe he peeks at the Larry ones too; I can't imagine any part of him being humble anymore.
I heard a rumor last year one of the boys had a sass account. I guess I need to check urban dictionary again to confirm this but I think it's one of those accounts where the guys can be anonymous under another username and say outrageous things. Whatever, sounds like a huge waste of time. I thought One Direction loved the attention on their verifieds. Why in the world would they care to watch the good, bad and ugly of Twitter land? I'm sure Louis might contemplate suicide if he saw what was really out there. I guess I was tame compared to the stuff people really say about him...
Do I think he's gay? Not sure on that one. I think he grew up with girls so I guess it rubbed off on him and I suppose the sass comes out of him easily. To be honest, I think Troy was right; I have to really know him to truly judge him. Who better than to infiltrate his best friend for the 411?
Maybe there's some way I can find out more about him through Troy. He said he knows him, why doesn't he prove it? Something tells me he's telling the truth. I think that's why I followed him. I know its evil to talk to someone just to get information from their famous friend but I'll never actually meet Louis, chances of that happening are incredibly slim. Doesn't mean I'm still not curious about him.
The flashes don't come back as much as they used to. Going to the auditions was a one time thing, I ripped up my number when my name wasn't called; never again. My dad, being from the UK, enormously rich, made sure I was there. He lives in an affluent neighborhood in Liverpool currently in some big flat with his new girlfriend after my parents separated. Actually I get the "are you alive?" call still, which in his way, means he cares. My dad isn't a bad guy per say, but at the same instance he isn't the most emotionally stable. We see eye to eye when we haven't talked in a long time otherwise there's no hope in building someone I can rely on family-wise. He has his life and I have mine. I can't change who he is and vise vera.
I snuggled my back against the back of the abandoned lifeguard post. I bundled my shoulders together, huddling the rest of my body heat. It was getting colder but I didn't care. A lot was on my mind tonight. Normally nothing is. I have tons of opinions just no one to relay them to. Now it feels like I do in Troy.
I wondered if he was still awake after we sent DMs to each other and parted ways. I didn't want to say goodbye but he said he had to go. I wanted to know more about Louis but I felt like I was more getting to know him as if he was on the other end instead. Was strange for a minute. I thought I was talking to the same person. Like I previously said, im-fucking-possible that's to happen.
I am not that lucky. In fact most of the things I tried for in life I never actually got. I don't consider just having a job and means of supporting myself a blessing. No one there cares if I off myself and the feeling is mutual. I really didn't give a shit about anyone anymore.
I never had anyone challenge me; Troy was the only one who sort of did. He kept talking to me It's odd, I've only had one conversation with him, but it made sense. I wanted to genuinely keep talking to this guy. I never had this kind of thing ever happen in real life. After about a minute and a half of talking to the average person, I gotta get the fuck out of there.
The seething hatred I feel for people doesn't make life any easy. I guess the realist in me would keep doing what I'm doing, don't change a thing. I never questioned getting along with others. If they don't make an effort with me than why should I? Would you?
I glanced over Troy's DMs and felt a small smile creep up, I tried hard to suppress it but I couldn't resist. Besides I'm alone, who's going to see me emote any positive feeling?
Just in case I looked around me. Shrugging I went back to the conversation and scrolled up to the top.
I read over everything, he was pretty open about Louis. Told me lots of things I never knew about him. He told me about a time where he and Louis were at this club and his friend Eddie got so drunk he had to carry him from a deep sleep out to a cab. I bet that must have funny for Louis. I reckon he's a lightweight if he drinks. Troy said he doesn't really drink but just gets buzzes. I like it when guys don't get pissed drunk. This Eddie guy I would not get along with. From the way Troy was describing him sounded to me like a guy who gets around. Kinda like Harry Styles, that walking VD.
He actually answered all the questions I had on Louis. It was weird how easy it was to get all this information. He didn't seem to mind. Maybe he was proud and wanted to brag about being buds with a famous person. The weird thing is, I'm still wondering why this guy, a friend of Louis' would ever want to talk to me in the first place. I'm not famous; I don't know anyone in the industry. My dad likes to brag he's met Tom Cruise on more than one occasion. Why me?
Our conversation was cut so short it felt like a game of 20 questions. I was doing most of the talking too; he didn't once decline anything I put to him. Very weird. I have my paranoia just like everyone else. How does he know so much about Louis anyway? Maybe Brits are a lot more open and honest than American guys. This I can believe. This is why I don't date. Not that I give off the impression that I'm single either, I doubt anyone from work wants to get with me. Everyone is so obsessed with family and health problems, small talk there is basically prohibited. You're almost forced to listen to everyone's boring life stories.
I got to the bottom of the page and smiled again. I hate this. I don't smile so easily. I don't program my body to fake a smile like everyone wants me to. It's pulling teeth to get me to behave at work. Being your authentic self feels the best. I try not to let anyone take that away. But in this moment, the smile was real. Am I supposed to understand this?
I felt blind suddenly, I looked up and a bright flashlight shined in my eyes.
"Hey, what are you doing here? We're closed." A gruff voice commanded behind the light.
My hand went to cover the brightness. I instantly got up, no questions asked or answered and bolted out of the docks, slipping my body through the cracks, landing on the soft, cool sand. I grabbed my shoes hauling out there in a flash. It looked funny I'm sure, me running on the sand and then I realized, nobody was chasing me, so I thought.
I heard a car, a truck that resembled a Tonka came following right behind me and I knew I had to hide. Was he really chasing me? Shit, now I'm in trouble. I thought for a second before moving my body anywhere. As long as he doesn't see me I'm golden.
I ran around aimlessly for ten minutes before I found a huge mermaid rock and pushed my body behind it. I'm not even sure I still had my shoes or phone on me. Shit, I wish Troy could help me now. Maybe distract him or call Louis so he can use his celebrity powers to save me. Don't those dipshits get away with everything nowadays?
"Ouch!" I yelped and grabbed my bare foot up. "Oh fuck…"
Something nipped me, more bit into my flesh. Holy fucks, I looked down I swear there was a sea creature attached to my foot. I felt its mother fucking teeth incise into my skin, piercing hard. This is serious.
Great just fucking great. How do you take these things off? My brain couldn't think straight. Is this part of the affect? God I hope not.
I propped up my body and sat against the rock, trying to pick up my foot. I saw crimson droplets of blood seeping into the sand, making it a light red color. Nothing scared me more than that. The pain was now numbing my foot. I couldn't lift my ankle so I bent down to look at it. It seemed really deep. I was too freaked out to do anything. I could feel my head getting a little light.
I need to get some help quickly before I really get in trouble. Shit, I hate asking for help. But I needed it now. I hopped, wobbled really with my sandals in one hand, steadying my body against the boulder. Jesus, why is moving suddenly so hard to do?
At this point I didn't care if I got in trouble by security, I really felt like I was going to collapse to the ground.
"Hey." Someone spoke ahead of me. I managed to look up, my vision slightly sugary. Damn it. I couldn't make out who it was. I felt the sand rumble and the figure was jogging up toward me.
I thought I heard Louis' voice for a second. Strange. Why am imagining him everywhere I turn? Ok focus now. Try to. Damn it. I knew the guy was coming close, I saw more blood drip off my foot. The affects were growing stronger now.
I only heard his voice. "Are you alright? Oh shit, are you hurt?"
With the last ounce of strength I had left I looked at the voice. I saw parts of his face, blue eyes a distinctively blue shade. Deep and young, I've seen them before. Maybe once before. My body didn't let me see the rest of him, just his eyes. His mouth was blurry but I managed to see it pressed into a thin line.
"I-I, I got it." I said, weakly. Fuck, shit no.
He laughed sharply. "No you don't, let me help you." I saw him look at me, his eyes widening. "OK, yeah, come on, you need my help."
I pushed his hand away. I didn't want to draw attention to myself. Plus this guy sounded an awful lot like Louis. I was officially losing my shit. He had to leave and so did I, if I could.
"I'm not. You're bleeding all over the sand. You need help. Let me…" He whispered, pausing.
I tried with all the juice I had to see his face that was going away too. I felt the creature release its sharp apex from my foot and I instantly fell over, but I didn't fall in the sand.
His arms, whoever this was, he caught me. "You're in shock, let's go get help."
I moaned, still able to speak. "Don't…need…your…help…"
Oh no, this was the end. My eyes shut, body limp in this stranger's arms.
"Relax love, I mean it…"