Devoted To Sex

I walk down to the end of the street and stand a few feet away from the girls standing there talking and listening to music on their iPods. They look at me and make a face at me before one of them bursts out laughing. I fold my arms and frown deeply blinking rapidly to keep the tears from falling from my eyes.
"No crying." I whisper to myself and exhale, closing my eyes. I hum softly and open my eyes when I hear the bus come to a screeching halt. I put a smile on my face and flip my hair over to one side. I climb on the bus after the girls get on and walk slowly looking for an open seat as quickly as possible. Everyone was looking at me and j heard some snickers behind me. Did I really look that bad? Did I really look that good? God I really need new clothes. I didn't think I looked so bad. I look at everyone that I was passing by practically staring at each person.
I stop when I get to the fifth row, meeting a pair of green sparkling eyes. I see him smile at me and I smile back pointing to the seat.
"Uh...can I sit?" I ask softly, feeling the bus drivers gaze on me just telling me to sit down with his eyes. I know I was holding up the bus schedule. The young boy nods and puts his book bag on his lap so I could have a seat next to him. I smile over at him, keeping my book bag on my back. Eventually people start talking amongst themselves again and I turn to the boy with the beautiful green eyes sitting next to me. I suppose I should actually try and talk to him.
"Hi." I say to the boy his curly chocolate colour curls swept across his forehead. "I'm Zoe." I say, smiling nervously at him. He looks back at me and half smiles.
"I'm Harry." He says smiling back at me and looks back down at a sheet of paper paper he had on his lap. I'm guessing that was his homework that he hasn't completed. I look at the paper as he erases and groans.
"Um, what is that math?" I ask him and he nods, rolling his eyes.
"Yeah, it's complicated." He says and shows me the paper. I tilt my head to the side slightly, taking the pencil from his hand. "Well, it's actually very simple. You're just making it harder for yourself. You don't need to do all of that addition. Just simply multiply and boom." I say jotting down the answer to the first and second question down on the paper.
Harry looks at me like I am some kind of God or something. His eyes twinkling and his mouth curved up in a smile.
"That was beautiful. Thank you." He says and tries out the third one, getting what to do now. "Hm, I like you." He laughs softly and I roll my eyes a bit, not knowing if it was because I helped him with his homework or if he actually like me as a nice person.
I soon learned that day was the start of a beautiful friendship that would last a long time.
-
*6 months Later*
Dear Journal,
Hey! Woah, has today been hectic! so much has been happening with my mum and school, it's been a very stressful week. My best friend Kyle and I hung out yesterday and he kissed me! It was my first real kiss and I loved it...until he tried to go further. I freaked out on him because I simply wasn't ready for that. My mum, her husband, Harry and I have been planning and saving so we could take a trip to Sweden for a few months. We were supposed to go this week but my mum "fell ill" again. I just think she doesn't want to go but who knows for sure? I was actually really excited to spend some time with the family and Harry for months now but every time we are ready something always happens. Maybe we are just not meant to go but it's whatever as long as I get to spend time with Harry either way. My mum thinks that we are dating but WE ARE NOT. We are strictly friends. He's my best friend in the world and I am his. We spend a lot of time together and my mum loves the boy to pieces so I know she is hoping that we get together sometime. Who knows what the future holds? Maybe one of these days we will be maybe we will just be friends.
I click my pen and close my journal turning around in my chair to look at Harry, who was laying on my bed.
"When can I read it?" He asks and I raise my eyebrows at him. "Your journal I mean." I shake my head and flip it over, biting my lip. My journal was not for anyone else's eyes but my own. It has some hard stuff in there about my life that no one knew not even that curly haired boy.
"When I am dead." I tell him and he frowns deeply.
"Ahh, come on don't be like that. Just let me read some of it. Unless you have some secrets in there you don't want me to know." He says narrowing his eyes at me. If I said yes to him reading it, he would be upset. We had made an agreement in the beginning of our friendship that we would not keep any secrets from each other and we would tell each other everything.
"Errr...I." I start and look down at my lap. "It's a personal matter, Harry." I tell him and he looks at me as if to say continue. "I haven't really told anyone and I just-I can't just tell anyone." I explain to him softly.
"Zoe, I am your best friend I have told you everything about me. You know me so well... Just please tell me I promise it will only be between you and I. I swear." He tells me sitting up and making a puppy dog face. I frown. Damn, he always win with that face.
I groan and grab my journal handing it to him. My hand shakes and I let out a deep breath. I was literally handing this boy my entire life. He has my life in his hands and I was trusting him with it. Please don't fail me Harry. Don't fail my trust.

Notes