Trapped

It was around 10:30 when I headed over to Zayn's. Fuck did this feel weird. Was I starting to catch feelings for him? This couldn't be a horrible thing - if anything, moving on from Declan is good...but it still didn't feel right. As pathetic as it is, I'm still convinced Declan will come around and take me back and although he treated me like shit, I'd still crawl back to him if need be. I quickly texted Zayn before slipping my iPhone back into my small cross body bag and left.

It was still raining pretty hard but I couldn't afford a cab. I let out a few groans before I started walking. I few thoughts clouded my head on my way there. I recalled on how Declan borderline ignored me and how Zayn and I kissed. I really didn't know how to feel or what exactly I should be doing. If I wanted Declan back so badly, why was I visiting another boy? Now I really wasn't starting to make sense. My phone vibrated in my purse, snapping me back into reality. Figuring it was Zayn, I decided to ignore it. He probably just said "okay" or something irrelevant; no use in getting my phone wet.

Twenty-five minutes later I arrived at the apartment's front door. I would've gotten here sooner but I needed a pack of cigarettes. There was no need to buzz Zayn's apartment, seeing as I still had a copy of Declan's keys. Ironic but convenient - I wasn't complaining. Stepping inside, I quickly shook my body in an attempt to get the excess moisture off of my clothing. The rain had only worsened since I left.

I began trekking up the stairs to Zayn's apartment. Looking down, I was slowly getting agitated by my boots squeaking with every step I took. Not paying attention to much of anything, a jolt of energy was sent though my body when I felt someones hand on my shoulder.

"Kayla, you came. I thought you wouldn't since you didn't respond but you did. You're here." Declan. What the fuck was he talking about. Did we arrange a get together without my knowledge?

"Wh-what are you talking about. Respond to what?" The tone of my voice came off a lot harsher than it intended but he was a dick to me before, so he kind of deserved it.

"My text message? I sent it to you about half an hour ago." His face grew just as puzzled as mine. I quickly scrambled in my bag to find my phone- only to see that text that I assumed was Zayn's, was in fact Declan's. It read:

"I shouldn't have acted the way I did before. Want to talk about it? Swing by tonight if you can."

Fucking shit. I felt my heart drop to my stomach - and I thought I was confused before. I looked up from my phone and Declan was still standing there, waiting for my answer. What prompted this? A few weeks ago it was as if he wanted me to disappear completely and now this? What the fuck did I miss?

"I'd love to talk to you but I'm actually here visiting a friend. I didn't even see your text until like..now." I said finally breaking the much too long silence.

"Which friend?" I'm not sure why but he sounded hostile, angry and a bit jealous. I guess Declan sensed I wasn't going to answer and kept talking. "There are a lot of unsaid things between us and I need to say them. Give me fifteen minutes max, I have no idea the next time you'll be around." My heart told me to say yes but, my head told me to stay on track and just head to Zayn's.

Before I knew it, I was sitting on Declan's couch in his apartment. You win this time heart. My phone buzzed; Zayn had texted me asking where I was. Tossing my phone off to the side, I decided it was best if I didn't answer. Declan walked back from the kitchenette, holding a beer for himself and a water bottle for me. Plopping down on the couch diagonal from me, he began to speak.

"Well I've been thinking a lot lately. I realized how much I do need you Kayla. I should have never cheated on you. I still love you.." His voice sounded so fake, as if he had rehearsed this in front of a mirror twelve times. It sounded so fucking unbelievable but something inside me told me he was being genuine. "I was actually gonna.." Clearing his throat, his voice was a bit louder. "I was going to ask if you wanted to move back in. I know it's really quick and last minute but I can't spend another day without you."

I felt woozy. The room was now spinning and I was left speechless. Of course I wanted to move back in. I wanted Declan back so fucking badly, but now that the offer was placed in front of me, I began to question it. What if he treats me like shit again? What if he kicks me out again? Chrissy would be furious. It was once again a head vs. heart battle.

"When can I move in?" Fuck. Heart wins again.

Notes