The Black Butterfly

When I saw her face, I thought nothing much of her. Just another ordinary girl who did not speak much for anything. Never spoke too loud or every got angry, never stuck out in anyway, shape or form. I was around 23 at the time, nearly six years ago, and yet the delicate personality of her precious soul, mind and heart is a constant reminder of what could have been. I still remember her bright eyes, her perfect smile and her hair. Her sweet laugh, gentle touch and caring words. Every aspect of her perfect being I know and always will.

I remember saying 'hello' for the first time to her; she worked as a waitress at Ombré, wearing a tight black dress as a uniform in the loud, crowded restaurant. She smiled and said hello back to me, like she would to any other paying customer, but with a stronger hint of kindness. I fell in love with her once she looked into my eyes and said her first word to me. I was under a spell, a trance that could not have been broken by anything. when she talked to me I could tell she was a shy girl, but had a strong personality. I told her my name and her face lit up like the sunshine. She told me her friends adored me and the rest of the band. I smiled and offered to buy her their finest glass of chardonnay. She nodded, pulled up a chair and started talking to me until she had to go back to work. I left my number on my check and from then on our love blossomed after that unforgettable night.

The last word she ever said to me was a complete blur. I recall that conversation took place on a sunday night. She was sniffling and moaning, and so was I. The only thing that i vividly remember about that night was the look of sorrow and pain she gave me before the shut the door. Her face spoke a million more words that her mouth could ever. She left me that night with only the painful memory of her dragging herself out of our home with a bag in one hand and car keys in the other. She whispered to me 'goodbye', and that was the end of that.

I have never felt a more excruciating and overwhelming feeling in my entire life. It felt as if a heavy darkness was consuming me slowly, suffocation me from the inside out. I was lost, lost in a sea of dread and despair without a compass and a boat. I had no idea how to find my way back home, I only knew how I got there, and it was a path full of beautiful flowers and happiness that was destroyed by the fire that hell blessed my fingertips with. I could never go back, and Id give the world and more just to have one more chance.

I have never saw my beautiful Madeleine ever again. Not a second that goes by I am not drowning in the memory of her walking away from me. The spell of love I was under had been broken by the hungry demons that live inside me. They still continue eating my heart and brain, taking over my entire existence. My flaw has cost me the best thing that has ever happened to me. A moment of weakness drove away my darling, my love, my Madeleine.

If only she knew what I would do for her to win back her trust and love. If only she could see the pain that I am suffering for her maybe she would be my queen again. Maybe we can start all over again, Maybe she would love me again... But she never would. I have took a innocent woman and placed her on the highest pedestal I could put her on and tore it down in a matter of seconds, leaving her on the ground after she has fallen. I killed her... No matter how carful you are, no matter how high you place something, no matter how much you love something, its going to be destroyed in a matter of time... And if it could kill what ever you loved it can damn well kill you too.

Right now I'm tied to a pole, my arms and legs are slowly becoming weaker. My mind is dissolving from every thought that races across my mind with the subject of Madeleine. My tears no longer fall to the ground, they now fall into my lungs where they drowned me. I can't continue to live like this. Im so close to the edge i might as well fall, but why die knowing that i can just take a step back? That is the question that is current consuming my thoughts, its the only source of power that is keeping me alive, therefore I constantly think about this. Maybe i should just think about this for the rest of eternity, or maybe I should just find Madeleine.

Notes

Hey guys, this is my very first chapter of The Black Butterfly! Please comment what you think, rate and subscribe!!