
My Light
I actually don't know what to say
Zayn's POV
I awake in the middle of the night and notice an absence. I look to my left and see the bed is empty. Turning, I see that it's only two am, she wouldn't have left in the dark, would she have? What even happened last night? I swing my legs over the side of the bed and rub my eyes. Two hours of sleep doesn't help much with energy.
I stretch my arms and rummage for my slippers in the dark, I see to my left a light on from under the door and decided that's probably where she is. I'd rather be sleeping at the moment but something is going on with Nora and I just want to know.
The door squeaks slightly and I see Nora, lost in thought in a book, cuddled up with a blanket next to a bedside lamp. Her hair is a bit of a mess, she looks tired, maybe she hasn't slept at all yet. I'm a pretty heavy sleeper so I don't notice when people leave the room.
“Hey.” My voice rough with sleep, it startles her a bit as she looks up quickly.
“Hey.” She smiles at me and puts her book down.
“What are you reading?” I ask. I have a variety of things on the shelf, so I have no idea what she would have picked. I've removed Nonna's book from my collection, hiding it in one of my traveling bags just to be cautious.
“Don't laugh.” She starts to chuckle as she holds up a book and I just roll my eyes.
“Really?” I laugh and come closer to her, sitting next to her. It's our book, it's One Direction's Official Autobiography.
“It looked interesting.” She smiles. “I've never read it.”
“Have you ready my part yet?” I ask, almost embarrassed.
“Well I read it first, of course.” Still laughing. “It's nothing to be embarrassed about Zayn, I think it's really cool that you have this, people want to know that much about you.” She shifts her hips to turn towards me, the blanket moving quietly.
“Why are you out here?” I ask.
“I couldn't sleep. Your bed is comfy but I don't have Albert here to keep me warm.” She looks off in the distance, biting her lip just a little bit.
“Albert?” I ask, squinting just a little bit.
“Ah yes, my slinky black cat. He sleeps with me at night.” I forgot she had a cat, I didn't see him at her place. “He likes to run away from strangers.” Well that explains it, its as if she's reading my mind. She's for sure avoiding the subject matter at hand. I hate pushing people, I hate being pushed when people always wanted more information from me.
“Where was he?” I ask, just making general conversation because I want things to be calm, I don't want to fight with her.
“I leave the window open in my room and he usually takes the steps to the roof.” She leans over and puts the book down on the coffee table. This conversation is going nowhere.
“What happened today at dinner?” I rub the back of my neck, cautiously. “I mean, I don't want to push it, I know it's not my business, but I don't speak Italian, and I know you and your grandma were talking about something. Does she not like me? Did I do something to offend her?” I ask, it's like word vomit just coming out of my mouth, all my thoughts I've been thinking out and about.
“Oh Zayn.” She gets closer to me. “It's just complicated.” She frowns.
“Just tell me.” I shrug. “If she doesn't like me, I can take it.” I promise her but it will break my heart a little bit, I really like Nora and I know that she wants her families approval.
Nora takes a deep breath and looks away for a second. “Nonna has Alzheimer's.” I didn't expect that at all. I'm reading her face as much as I can, this is an emotional confession, I know it. “That's why I work days, my mom works nights, someone is always around with her. She gets aggressive when she can't remember, sometimes memories mesh together, I mean, she knows what's happening but she gets angry when she can't remember.” I can see her biting her lips, probably biting back tears.
“Nora.” I start to say before she speaks.
“I'm not finished.” She starts to fiddle with the blanket, running it through her fingers. “She was asking about my ex-fiance, Piero.” I try to hide the shock on my face but it's hit me like a brick. Nora was engaged? She never mentioned it. “Nonna was asking where Piero was, if I was cheating on him with you.”
“You were engaged?” I regret it the moment it slipped out of my lips. Out of everything she just told me, that's the only thing I comment on? Nice going Zayn.
“Yeah. It was a mistake. He was a childhood friend, his family moved away when I was in junior high then I ran into him when I was in college. It's like I was holding on to life from before. When I knew Piero before, my Nonno was alive, Nonna didn't have this terrible disease, it's like I had some memory lapse that I just wanted life to be that way again. We moved fast, I thought I was in love but I didn't really know what love was.” She bundles her knees to her chest and I know this was a big deal for her. “I'm sorry I didn't tell you.” She frowns looking at me.
“It's okay, I mean, I was married before.” I try to laugh, thinking about that not so fun time in my life. “But lets talk about that another time.” I grasp around her shoulder, pulling her closer to me. “When did this happen?” I'm hoping not like two months ago, that's still pretty fresh.
“Piero and I broke up a little over a year ago. I was trying on wedding dresses and it was like all the sudden everything clicked and it was the last thing I wanted. The last thing I wanted was to be his wife. I didn't want his last name, I didn't want his children, I just didn't want any of it. I broke it off that night.”
“Have you seen him since?” I'm just wondering. I don't want to pry but I mean, I've pretty much been prying this whole time.
She laughs, it's a stiff uncomfortable laugh. “Um, yes actually. He's engaged to be married to my cousin Vera.” If I had a drink, it would have been spit out all over the couches.
“What? You're kidding me.” I know my mouth is agape, how can it not be?
“Yeah, about a month later I ran into them having coffee, holding hands. And now they're getting married. As bad as it sounds, I just don't even care.” She shrugs. I know this has to bother her more than she's putting off.
“Your cousin. He's marrying your cousin.” I state basically for clarification, I can't believe she's so calm about this. It's insane.
“I know right?” She smiles and looks away, covering her face. “So do you want to come with me? Be my guest at the wedding?” What the fuck. I can't help but laugh. “Oh God, I thought I could keep my crazy family from you as long as possible.” She leans over, putting her hand on my shoulder and kissing my cheek. “Save me from them. We can sit in the back and laugh.”
“I can't even believe this, like I actually don't know what to say.” My mind is racing away and I just can't focus on one thing at a time.
“Well, I can walk away. I'm sure it's a lot to take on right now. I've had a bit of a crazy past. It's okay if you don't like it.” She pushes back a little bit, creating some distance. Waiting for my reaction.
“No, Nora, I don't want to you to walk away.” God knows my past isn't squeaky clean. “It's just a lot to process. I mean, do we have to bring a gift?” My question has her snorting with laughter.
“No gift for them. I only have to make an appearance because of Nonna, my mom, and the rest of my family. My uncle is a bit of an ass but I love my cousin Salvatore, we call him Leo, that's his middle name. He doesn't like Piero either so I'm sure we'll all get along famously.” She smirks, I can see the wheels turning in her head.
“It sounds wonderful. But you should get some sleep, it's past three.” I stand and stretch a little bit, holding my hand for her to take.
-------------------
I awaken to my phone ringing, it's six am. Shit, don't people ever sleep in, or let me sleep in. I silence it quickly and see Nora sleeping quietly. I notice that it's Harry calling. I haven't spoken with him in a while so I quietly tip-toe out to the living room, closing the door.
“Harry.” I sing out, my voice groggy with sleep.
“Zayn! What are you doing? Did I wake you?” He asks as I plop on the couch.
“Well yeah, it's like six am mate.” I laugh, messing with my hair, rubbing my eyes.
“Well shit. It's eleven here, I would have thought you were awake by now, where are you?” He asks.
“I'm in New York.” I tend to disappear, enjoying my privacy. Plus we all tend to stay away from the tabloid news so we don't really know what's going on with all of us.
“Have you still been stalking your mystery train rider?” He asks, chuckling. I can picture him sitting next to the window, chewing on his finger nail or mindlessly admiring people outside.
“Um, well actually I've met her, she's in my room right now.”
“No way.” He gasps, Harry loves a good romance more than most, he has a soft spot for it. “Why are you talking to me then? What's her name? What's she like? What does she do?”
“Because you called. Her name is Nora, she's really cool, and she's a florist.” I remind him, giggling a little bit. I feel like a school girl.
“Ah, so fitting. Call me later, lots to talk about apparently.” We say our goodbyes and I just can't wait to lounge in bed with Nora all day.
Notes
And know you know, well some if it, I still have more up my sleeve. :) Happy Easter weekend! Hope you all have good one, I'll be back sometime next week! :)
Before I go though, please be nice. I don't like reading my comments and seeing drama. I've seriously thought about quitting this story quite a few times and that doesn't help. As my mom always says, you never get taller making someone else feel small. If you don't like my story, I can accept that but don't bash others because they do. Their is enough hate in this world, I don't need it on a story I've created. :)
Have a wonderful day!!
xoxox
@KAOT
THANKS, I LOVE ALLLLL OF YOUR STORIES. THE ARE LITERALLY THE BEST WRITIN ONES I HAVE EVER READ.THEY ARE SOO DETAILED TO .YOU OBVIOUSLY PUT ALOT OF EFFORT IN YOUR STORIES
10/21/16