Reviews! :D

So @Beths_a_bae , I've come up with a few things I would add and that I liked.
Liked:
1. I like how you didn't know all the details when you start reading - definitely good starter.
2. I like how you made her tough, and not some girly girl that can't handle anything- gives readers a sense of what she's like.
3. I like the bond between Harry and Eleanor -shows something could happen in the nearby future perhaps.
4. I like how you made Zayn be in a gang sort of thing -shows that not all of the boys are good (if you use all of them) in this story.

What I would add:
1. More detail -I think there could be a little more detail, with everyone, like maybe give a little bit of background information, but not too much; you don't want your readers to get overwhelmed.
2. Make your chapters a little bit longer- they are a little short, like I would combine the first and second chapter, and that would equal one. And like I said before, just take some time to really put some detail for your readers so they don't get confused.
3. This is really picky, but I would actually give the characters outfits. You don't have to, but I'm gonna tell you what I do if you would like to try it. I go to this website called Polyvore.com, I love it because you can make outfits that really fit your characters personalities. I make the outfits, then just use the text-to-URL button (third in from the right). Right HERE is the link to Polyvore, and I just thought you would like to see that you can use it with whatever URL and whatever word you would like.
4. I would actually put in a few more characters. I would maybe put in a few of the other boys (Liam Louis Niall), gives readers more things to think of.
5. Maybe make Eleanor have another love interest, to make Harry jealous- gets readers pumped and excited for what happens next. ;)

I really, really, like this story, which is saying a lot, because I'm a picky reader. If you follow these steps, (you don't have to, but I highly recommend it) it could definitely reach the top pages soon.

I am also recommending something else to do. Read these fanfics:
Beautiful Monster
Opposties Attract
Young Minds, Young Love
Dark
And I also suggest you read my 3-series story, just to get a sense of how bad I was-then I read these stories and how much I improved. (You can get there just by clicking my name)

Your story is really, really good -so please DON'T give up on it!

I wish you the best of luck lovely!

X, Chels.

Notes