Beyond The Lights: Shatter Me
Chapter Two
I'm friends with the monster that's under my bed
Get along with the voices inside of my head
You're trying to save me, stop holding your breath
And you think I'm crazy, yeah, you think I'm crazy Well, that's nothing
Well, that's nothing, woohoo, hoo, hoo
~ Rihanna, Monster ~
Chapter Two
When you first lose someone close to you, it's like a hole in your heart. All you feel is pain and hurt, anger and sadness, regret and grief. Then you go numb. I remember feeling like that when I first lost my mother. Over time, I made myself forget about it. I forgot about her. How pretty she was. How she laughed and the way she would come home late from work and me and my brother and sister would wait up for her.
She would tell us bedtime stories as we waited for dad to come home from his latest tournament. Quite often, he would be gone for days, sometimes weeks at a time. After she died, my father had layed off of his career for a while. He would stay home and tend to us. By that time though, we were pretty much old enough to not need watching at all.
I looked like my mom, at least that's what my dad and elder brother said. How do you escape pain and grief when the reason for your grief, or at least a supposed look a like, stares at you everytime you happen to walk past even the least reflective surface? I remember a time when he would look guilty any and every time I came into my father's field of vision.
That's when we found out, he had an affair and now that my mother had been gone for what he called a suitable amount of time, he had reentered a relationship with the woman, Helena, her name was. We found out other things then, too. Like, how our younger sister, Jeanie, was our half sister and that my mom had agreed to take her in and raise her. Or how we had another half sister, Lana. He wanted us to meet her and Lana before they were wed.
Wed. They wanted to get married.
Both Helena and Lana were terrible to me and my brother. My dad went back to traveling all over the world to compete in tournaments. Helena had an affair, a man that would come around whenever dad was away. We didn't care. Good for his ass, he should get hurt like he hurt mom. But then, she divorced him and decided that she wanted to keep us when he found out. The courts agreed because surely a professional fighter isn't a safe father, right? They were wrong.
I was angry. Years of hurt and betrayal flowed through me. Sweat poured down my face as I hit the bag. Each swing was careful and precise. I had my father's talent. I was a fighter by nature, but it wasn't something I did by itself. No, I was an entertainer. But I would compete in small tournaments, and I would always win.
I stop.
Breathe.
And there was the calm numbing feeling again.
Willow. I had met Willow during this. I remember the first time I saw her. I was sophomore in highschool, me and my friends had a free period, and we were talking about normal teen girl stuff. Which boy is the hottest. Who's current boyfriend is being a dick and shit. I was bored, just looking around the courtyard when I saw her.
She was beautiful. Long red hair that ended right below her shoulders, bright blue eyes, a small smile and a light dusting of freckles that fell over her nose and high on her cheekbones.
I must have been staring because just then I was hit lightly by Chellie who giggled when she saw what or rather, who I was looking at.
I pick up my towel and throw it across my neck, using the fluffy ends to wipe the sweat from my face.
The other girls encouraged me and when I finally had enough guts, I went over to her.
My phone rings, a song from Drew's album blasting from the speaker, it pulls me out of my thoughts.
"Yeah?"
Xxx
(Louis)
"We need to talk," he says bluntly, "can we meet later?"
"I'm busy," She replies.
"Well, maybe if you hadn't ran out of the damned hotel when everyone else was asleep, we could have handled this earlier."
She could hear the sleep and aggravation in his voice. Unbeknownst by him, she grins into the phone.
He hears the clicking of her lighter going and listens to her deep inhale.
"Look, Lewis."
His mouth tightens in further irritation, "It's Louis."
"Yeah, whatever, pumpkin. Point is, I'm not going to be home for a while, surely you understand, me being world famous, places to go, people to amaze with my presence, and all."
He leans against the wall of the large kitchenette, thankful his roommate was out already.
"Look Jynx, I don't have time or patience to play these silly games with you. You made a promise and you are going to keep it, unless you want me to spill about what you do after-hours."
She goes silent for a minute.
Now, he smirks. If he was right, her eyes narrowed and she was gritting her teeth.
"Lewis, don't threaten me," she sighs out.
"Louis."
"Ugh," she scoffs.
The line clicks off and a grin lights up his face.
Xxx
(Jynx)
"Goddamned motherfucker, stupid ass son of a bitch. Hate that fucking smug, British bastard."
I swore under my breath and go back to the bag and collect my things.
"Damn bastard."
I drag another breath from my cigarette and storm out the door.
...
Cameras flash in my face, and I become even more annoyed. I stomp on the pedal of my bike and rev the engine. I pick up speed and stop right outside the door of the hotel.
I take my keys out and slip them into my pocket, making for the door. Once I'm through the door I toss my keys to the first attendant I see, "Don't scratch my baby." I had someone to see, and was too annoyed to deal with the press or the tedious job of parking my bike.
I make it to the elevator and hurriedly press the button, groaning in aggravation, damn thing couldn't come down fast enough. When the doors finally chime open I walk in and try to calm myself. I light a cigarette. I wasn't going to give him the benefit of seeing me rattled.
I get off the elevator and go to his door. Taking a deep breath, I place the smoke between my lips and lean up against the door frame. I knock once, twice and wait.
The door swings open and there he is. Shirtless and barefoot, his hair a mess, sticking up in all directions and a look of aggravation on his face.
"How lovely of you to make time for me." He huffed, sarcasm practically oozing out from between his lips.
"Uh-huh. Very nice of me, if you ask my opinion."
I walk in and the door swung closed behind me, I felt his eyes on me.
I wasn't ready for this.
Get along with the voices inside of my head
You're trying to save me, stop holding your breath
And you think I'm crazy, yeah, you think I'm crazy Well, that's nothing
Well, that's nothing, woohoo, hoo, hoo
~ Rihanna, Monster ~
Chapter Two
When you first lose someone close to you, it's like a hole in your heart. All you feel is pain and hurt, anger and sadness, regret and grief. Then you go numb. I remember feeling like that when I first lost my mother. Over time, I made myself forget about it. I forgot about her. How pretty she was. How she laughed and the way she would come home late from work and me and my brother and sister would wait up for her.
She would tell us bedtime stories as we waited for dad to come home from his latest tournament. Quite often, he would be gone for days, sometimes weeks at a time. After she died, my father had layed off of his career for a while. He would stay home and tend to us. By that time though, we were pretty much old enough to not need watching at all.
I looked like my mom, at least that's what my dad and elder brother said. How do you escape pain and grief when the reason for your grief, or at least a supposed look a like, stares at you everytime you happen to walk past even the least reflective surface? I remember a time when he would look guilty any and every time I came into my father's field of vision.
That's when we found out, he had an affair and now that my mother had been gone for what he called a suitable amount of time, he had reentered a relationship with the woman, Helena, her name was. We found out other things then, too. Like, how our younger sister, Jeanie, was our half sister and that my mom had agreed to take her in and raise her. Or how we had another half sister, Lana. He wanted us to meet her and Lana before they were wed.
Wed. They wanted to get married.
Both Helena and Lana were terrible to me and my brother. My dad went back to traveling all over the world to compete in tournaments. Helena had an affair, a man that would come around whenever dad was away. We didn't care. Good for his ass, he should get hurt like he hurt mom. But then, she divorced him and decided that she wanted to keep us when he found out. The courts agreed because surely a professional fighter isn't a safe father, right? They were wrong.
I was angry. Years of hurt and betrayal flowed through me. Sweat poured down my face as I hit the bag. Each swing was careful and precise. I had my father's talent. I was a fighter by nature, but it wasn't something I did by itself. No, I was an entertainer. But I would compete in small tournaments, and I would always win.
I stop.
Breathe.
And there was the calm numbing feeling again.
Willow. I had met Willow during this. I remember the first time I saw her. I was sophomore in highschool, me and my friends had a free period, and we were talking about normal teen girl stuff. Which boy is the hottest. Who's current boyfriend is being a dick and shit. I was bored, just looking around the courtyard when I saw her.
She was beautiful. Long red hair that ended right below her shoulders, bright blue eyes, a small smile and a light dusting of freckles that fell over her nose and high on her cheekbones.
I must have been staring because just then I was hit lightly by Chellie who giggled when she saw what or rather, who I was looking at.
I pick up my towel and throw it across my neck, using the fluffy ends to wipe the sweat from my face.
The other girls encouraged me and when I finally had enough guts, I went over to her.
My phone rings, a song from Drew's album blasting from the speaker, it pulls me out of my thoughts.
"Yeah?"
Xxx
(Louis)
"We need to talk," he says bluntly, "can we meet later?"
"I'm busy," She replies.
"Well, maybe if you hadn't ran out of the damned hotel when everyone else was asleep, we could have handled this earlier."
She could hear the sleep and aggravation in his voice. Unbeknownst by him, she grins into the phone.
He hears the clicking of her lighter going and listens to her deep inhale.
"Look, Lewis."
His mouth tightens in further irritation, "It's Louis."
"Yeah, whatever, pumpkin. Point is, I'm not going to be home for a while, surely you understand, me being world famous, places to go, people to amaze with my presence, and all."
He leans against the wall of the large kitchenette, thankful his roommate was out already.
"Look Jynx, I don't have time or patience to play these silly games with you. You made a promise and you are going to keep it, unless you want me to spill about what you do after-hours."
She goes silent for a minute.
Now, he smirks. If he was right, her eyes narrowed and she was gritting her teeth.
"Lewis, don't threaten me," she sighs out.
"Louis."
"Ugh," she scoffs.
The line clicks off and a grin lights up his face.
Xxx
(Jynx)
"Goddamned motherfucker, stupid ass son of a bitch. Hate that fucking smug, British bastard."
I swore under my breath and go back to the bag and collect my things.
"Damn bastard."
I drag another breath from my cigarette and storm out the door.
...
Cameras flash in my face, and I become even more annoyed. I stomp on the pedal of my bike and rev the engine. I pick up speed and stop right outside the door of the hotel.
I take my keys out and slip them into my pocket, making for the door. Once I'm through the door I toss my keys to the first attendant I see, "Don't scratch my baby." I had someone to see, and was too annoyed to deal with the press or the tedious job of parking my bike.
I make it to the elevator and hurriedly press the button, groaning in aggravation, damn thing couldn't come down fast enough. When the doors finally chime open I walk in and try to calm myself. I light a cigarette. I wasn't going to give him the benefit of seeing me rattled.
I get off the elevator and go to his door. Taking a deep breath, I place the smoke between my lips and lean up against the door frame. I knock once, twice and wait.
The door swings open and there he is. Shirtless and barefoot, his hair a mess, sticking up in all directions and a look of aggravation on his face.
"How lovely of you to make time for me." He huffed, sarcasm practically oozing out from between his lips.
"Uh-huh. Very nice of me, if you ask my opinion."
I walk in and the door swung closed behind me, I felt his eyes on me.
I wasn't ready for this.
Notes
A/N: Ah! I'm so sorry guys, time got away from me. But happy late new year! New chapter, new year lol. I hope y'all like it, tell me what you think!
I'm already really liking this. You've set up the scene and story really well. Can't wait to read more when you update.
6/1/15