Being Carter Hood (5SOS)

The sweet smell of roasting marshmallows, the sound of crackling wood, and the soothing warmth from the vibrant fire fills our senses as we sit gathered in a small circle.
"Egh how can you eat it like that?" Calum gestures to my crispy burnt marshmallow on my stick. I release a soft chuckle. "Because its the best way to eat it." I smirk and take the sticky goodness in my fingers and take a huge bite, letting it melt on my tongue.
Everyone watches and breaks into a soft roar of laughter as Calum looks at the remains of it on my stick in disgust. I shake my head with a smile, then it soon grows into a smooth silence.

"Where do you think we will all be in 10 years from now?" Ashton asks curious, as he adjusts his black bandana before snuggling beside Stella more. We all look around at eachother, giving it some thought.

"I'd like to at least be engaged, if not then married." Calum speaks up first, and some of us nod in agreement.
"In America or Australia?" Michael adds, loosening his grip on my hand slightly. Stella and Ashton say Australia, while my brother and Michael say they'd like to switch between both.
"Wherever life takes me, I believe." Luke answers. I furrow my eyebrows in curiosity. "What do you mean?" I say quickly. For the first time since we arrived at the sand area he looked at me. His eyes glanced at the guitar sitting on his lap before they landed back at me. The air was still and quiet. "I just mean that it depends if I grow to have someone in Australia that I can't live without that lives there then I would go back and stay, but if not then I'd probably stay here." Luke explains not breaking eye contact with me. I nod slowly. "I agree." I breath out and crack a small smile hoping he smiles back, but only left with a blank face and him quickly breaking eye contact.
The reality of everyone watching us in amusement gives me an uncomfortable feeling sending chills down my back. Stella clears her throat awkwardly. "Well. How about a game?" She chimes in, putting on a cheerful face.
"You okay?" Michaels breath brushes against my ear as he whispers to me. "Yeah completely. I'm just going to take a quick walk to get away from this smoke, its giving me a bit of a headache." I whisper the first sentence then rise to my feet and say the rest in a normal tone. Having their eyes back on me, with less awkwardness. Michaels eyes flash concern. "I'll go with you." He jumps to his feet. "No, really I'm fine. I'll be right back." I peck his cheek and quickly yet casually fled before he could argue more. Feeling guilty at the hurt expression he held. He's always asking me if I'm okay and everytime I say Yes. In hopes he'd just stop asking.

Their talking got more foggy to my ears as the distance lengthened and my thoughts no longer felt bothered. I wasn't lying, I do have a headache. Just not from the smoke.
My walk started to progress to a jog then a full run with the cold wind hitting my skin as the giant rock I secretly went to often came in sight, hidden from the camping area. My hand gripped the vodka water bottle in my jacket pocket the whole way. Making sure it didn't fall out with every strut.I sighed heavily, turning towards the back of the rock and began to make my way to the top. The rock is a dusty black with a nice large plato surface, the sides were surrounded by hard sand and multiple smaller rocks. Giving it some what of a stairs pathway to come and go.

I sit in my usual spot at the very edge in the middle with my legs comfortably hanging off. Almost two yards from the ground. My eyes gaze over the million stars. I cough shortly with bitterness after the first sip of alcohol slides down my throat.
Only three minutes pass before the feeling of someone behind me makes me tense. I stay still and keep my wide eyes on the ocean view. I hear their foot hit against the rock softly as they take another step. My thoughts gather who it is and release a sigh. "Michael, I said I'm -"
Only to find my self caught off guard as I finally turn around to discover the owner of the footsteps to be Luke.
"Oh sorry, thought you were Michael. Did you follow me?" I hesitantly stand to my feet and walk a bit closer, away from the edge. "Doesn't matter." He states as his sad eyes study me. I notice the gloominess in his eyes from obvious exhaustion. My lips smile cautiously at him, but soon drop.

"I was wondering if I could ask you something Luke." I speak up softly, thinking of my conversation with Stella earlier. He looks out at the ocean then back at me. His presence coming off confused and angry remains.

"Do you think I'm stupid, Carter?" Luke spats and I mentally flinch in a way. My thoughts circling.
"N-no. Of course not." I shake my head, in disbelief that he would ask me that. "I would never think that, you know me." I add. Luke lets out a sarcastic chuckle.

"I'm not sure I do. Not like I thought I did, because THE CARTER I THOUGHT I KNEW WOULD NOT LIE TO ME!" His temper increases, clearly hurt. Sending all the guilt rushing towards me at once. "I dont know what your taking about." I attempt, hoping this wasn't happening. Tears sting my eyes threatening to fall.
"THIS!" He yells reaching over to my hand. I try to stop him but his grip rips the water bottle from my hand and quickly opens the top, fustrated. "YOU MAY BE ABLE TO FOOL EVERYONE, BUT NOT ME, CARTER! I KNOW WHEN SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH YOU." Luke begins to forcefully pour the vodka from the bottle onto the rock. The depressing sight pushes my tears to fall. Everything comes at me ready to fight, hitting me down inside. He's known. This whole time we've been here Luke has silently watched. I hurt him. One of the few people I never wanted to.
"No! I Need that!" I cry and try to grab the now empty bottle. "Just admit it.." Luke's voice now softens, nothing but sadness and concern comes from his tone. The tears coming from his own eyes confirm it.

"I CAN'T!" I scream throwing my hands in my hair, pulling slightly through sobs. "YES YOU CAN." Luke confidently pleads tries to encourage me, giving me all his focus. I tried to ignore his presence, but my mind refuses my wish.
"WHY DO YOU CARE!?" I immediately respond with a stupid question. A very stupid one.. One that I'm not sure why I needed an actual answer. I examine him through the gloominess of my wall of tears. Seeing him become hesitant, making me become confused. He throws his arms up in frustration.
"GOD DAMNIT CARTER. BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!!"
Luke breaths heavily. Everything spins in my head as I try to comprehend his words. The three words that stuck to my ears. I. LOVE. YOU.

"W-W-" Not a single word could leave my trembling lips. My mind is tangled everywhere. My sobs increase with being overwhelmed.
I feel Luke grip my shoulders smoothly from where I stand. "Just admit it." He says. I look up at him as he cups my cheek with one of his hands. Fresh tears falling from both of our eyes.
"I-I need help." I sob harder and he pulls me to his chest, holding up my body before it could hit the ground. My fingers grip the back of his t-shirt. "Im sick ,Luke!" My voice cries into his chest. He holds me so closely while he soothes me as if I might break in his arms.
"I know, baby girl.. Shhh I know."

Notes

OMG I HOPE YOU LOVED THIS CHAPTER. I WORKED SO HARD. SO COMMENT WHATCHA THINK <3 :)