Harry
June 8, 2014

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I blinked back the tears as I stared at the shiny silver casket lower into the brown, bitter dirt. I could barley hear Sophia cry onto Delilah’s shoulder. Megan couldn’t make the funeral, for a reason that I did not know of. I felt numb as everything around me moved in slow motion. I could sense the cold stares being shot at me from various people at this time, because today everyone only knew me as the reason Tanner McMan was dead. I never even got to say goodbye, none of us did. I got him into the mess that got him this way and now there is no way to get him out. I killed my best friend. Me.

They left the coffin closed because the body was ‘too damaged’, but I didn’t want to see him that way. I still couldn’t make myself out that all of this was real. It felt like a dream, or more like a nightmare. He was gone. How fucked up is that? One minute you are playing x-box and having a few slices of pizza and the next he is gone, you are attending his funeral and not accepting the fact that this is real. This is fucking happening right now and it’s just too much… It’s too much.

I looked at the tombstone, trying to clam myself down for the time being. I read it over and over again..

In Loving Memory Of
Tanner McMan
A Lovely Friend, Brother, Son.
(1996-2014)
Rest In Peace.

Tanner’s Brother, David, walked up beside me. He shoved his hands in his pockets and stared straight ahead as Tanner was set down in the bottom of the dark hole. Delilah and Sophia stood next to me, Sophia sobbing up a storm as small tears slid down Delilah’s cheek. The sound of the bulldozer engine starting up alarmed me. I still couldn’t grasp that any of this was really, Maybe it isn’t... Maybe he isn’t dead.

“No…” I quietly mumbled, making David glance over at me. The bulldozer then begun to push into the hole and made it fall onto the casket, I couldn’t take it. “No stop...” I said a bit louder, catching the attention of Delilah. “He isn’t dead, No! He can’t be” I said, getting louder “Make them stop!” I almost yelled.

I know I was making a scene at the funeral and I know that may seem disrespectful to some people, but right now… I don’t care. I lost my best friend, he was like a brother to me and if these people want to judge me then they can go right ahead, because at this point it doesn’t matter.

I tried to run towards the casket but David held me back, forcing me to stand in place, watching the whole scene go down. “Stop!” I hollered “Let me go!” The birds flew out of the tress around us, startled. I knew I would be startled, but unfortunately I don’t have the capability to flee from my problems like them or maybe I did.

I took deep, shaky breaths, calming myself down. Settle down, Harry. Breathe. I tried not to think about the situation that was taking place right in front of me. I closed my eyes

The engine turned off and I knew it was over. Its was finished. I just had to accept it.

I couldn’t stand the sight of pounds of dirt stacked on top of my friend. All I could think of was that I had to get out of here. Now.

I shook off David now loosen up grip before I turned away from the sickening sight. I could walk away and get some time to cool down, but what good would that do? I felt a soft hand slip into mine. I knew it was Delilah’s just by the way her thumb played with mine, trying to calm me down. Trying to assure me that everything was going to be fine. That it was okay, But I needed to get out of here.

I pulled my hand away from Delilah’s grasp before gently pushing my way through the crowed of people that was placed in front of me. “Harry...” I heard Delilah say as she followed behind me, leaving Sophia behind. I kept walking forward until I finally broke free of the pack, wanting some time to myself. “Harry…” Delilah repeated, still some where within the people attending.

When she finally broke out from the swarm of people she contained a worried look spread across her face. Delilah’s mouth gaped open to speak “Harry, are you-“

I quickly cut her off, not wanting to talk at this moment “I’m fine, I don’t need your concern.” I uttered, not really giving any thought of what was escaping my mouth. I kept walking towards a bench under a tree before she spoke out again, “I’m just trying to help”

I ran my fingers through my unkempt curls before replying, “I don’t need help, What I need is some time alone. To myself. I guess that is too much to ask for” I admitted, but I automatically regretted it when I noticed the hurt look on her face when her eyes met mine “Delilah, I’m sorry” I mumbled before I slouched myself onto the bench.

She didn’t say anything, she just sat down next to me and placed her hand on my lap, In a comforting way. “Listen, harry. I know what you’re going through.”

“How could you possibly know what I’m going through. I killed my friend. It was my fault. I feel like its my fault he died, and it is”

“ I feel like I killed my dad,” She started out quietly “I went out everyday not wanting to be here because I felt like I killed him.” Delilah peeled her eyes away from me to glance down at her hands “But I couldn’t let that stop me from doing things I loved and I wont let it stop you, Harry. I don’t want you to go through what I did. You didn’t kill him harry, Its not your fault” Delilah sincerely spoke. I could tell she was fighting back the tears as she glanced at me once again.

I didn’t like to see her cry, and I sure as hell wasn’t going to be the reason she was. I leaned in and kissed the top of her head. “Don’t cry, Baby girl.” I whispered. “I’m trying not to.” She said as I felt her tears hit my pressed khakis.

We sat there, just enjoying each others company. I loved it when she was with me, just us talking brighten ups my day. And for the days we don’t talk are just mediocre. She was an amazing girl. She deserves the best, and If we ever end up together… that’s what I’ll give her.

“Delilah,” I said, catching her attention “Will you be my girlfriend?” I questioned her, but I began thinking … Was this too sudden? I then realized I was asking her this question at a funeral. My best friends funeral, But he would be happy for us. I think… He would tell me to say away, that she would just cause trouble and I may never know why he would assume that.

“It would be my honor” She smiled, knocking me out of my futile thoughts.


Delilah and I sat there, watching the funeral continue and the crowds depart. Sophia took a cab home in the middle, saying it was too much, getting the same feeling I did. The feeling that no one understood what she was going through, but she just has to find a person to talk it out with. But I guess she lost that person, and she knew it was my fault.




Officer Patterson
June 26, 2014

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“Do you know what class she had during the shooting?” Patterson asked Sophia, not holding back. Not bother saying ‘the incident’ like he was trained to do for talking to victims

Sophia frantically ran her hands through her blonde silky hair “Uhm..I.. uh” She rambled, He voice was shaking as her heart was beating quickly. Patterson was about to lose his patients before she finally answered “I think… Photo.. Photography class.” She answered “Yeah, I’m positive it’s that one.”

Patterson shook his head, knowing the teacher who taught that class was the one who pulled out the gun. Patterson was one hundred percent sure that this Delilah girl was not breathing, because from what he just visualized in that specific class room was impossible to survive from.

“What... What’s wrong?” Sophia asked, getting a bit panicky.

Patterson took a hard look at Sophia, realizing she had blood splattered on her clothes and on her skin that he couldn't understand why he didn't notice it before. She had a traumatized and worried look in her deep blue eyes. She was looking over her shoulder, making sure she knew who and what was around her at all time. Patterson knew she needed help, she need to be calmed down and he also knew he couldn't do that for her. He then gazed around the gym, calling over another office.

The office nodded his head and departed from the other people he was speaking with before he reached Patterson. “Yes, sir?”

“This victim needs help, please take her outside. She shouldn’t be in here” He strictly told him.

The other officer looked at Sophia, noticing her condition as well before laceing his arm around Sophia’s shoulder, gently pushing her towards the double doors that lead out to the school hallway “No.. No!” Sophia yelled “I want to help! Let me help! She is my friend!"

Officer Patterson ignored her pleads and just headed back to the photography room, knowing Delilah had to be in there, or maybe just maybe.. she escaped.

Notes

Hey guyyyys, sucky update, I know I know.. I am such a procrastinator! I know, i say im going to update but i never do and i feel SO bad. I'm sorry guys, Im probably the worst author or updater ever. And i have reason why i held off the updates so much

1) I'm going through a bad break up. ugh. Hate it.
2) I have been studying for finals
3) I been getting mail from some account on here called SureWhatEver telling me to delete this story and i dont know why. She is telling me to delete it or she will hack my account and delete it and its kind of freaking me out because she keeps sending me mean messages, but its kind of annoying.
4) I Just been really busy.

I am SO sorry guys x I promise once June hits i will update sooo much because its the summer! x yay! ANd thank you guys for 183 subs! OMG like What! almost 200! omg what??? I honestly didnt think this story would ever hit anywhere near 200 subs! x thank you guys! x

and I was looking on this website and i noticed something that is really bothering me. HOW COME REALLY GOOD STORIES ON HERE THAT ARE REALLY GOOD AND ARE SO WELL WRITTEN DONT HAVE A LOT OF SUBS AS SOME THAT DO THAT ARENT EVEN THAT GOOD. it kind of bothers me. But I'm going to post a story on every update that i think deserves more subsribers. Like this story http://www.harrystylesfanfiction.com/Story/44116/Lips-Regrets/Lips & Regrets by audreydeville It is so amazing x Please check it out. she deserves more subs x She is such an aazming writer.

Anyways guys, thats it. Im sorry, ill try to update more x Please Subscribe and Vote! and PLEASEEE Comment! x Comments actually encourage me to update more x Okay yeah bye

If anyone ever wants to talk you can kik me here: JustLorenaHere I'm always up for a chat! x