TWO MONTHS LATER- EARLY DECEMBER

“Call me when you land, okay?” I kissed Harry as he picked up his carry on bag.

“Yes of course.” He kissed me back. “I’ll only be gone two weeks, then I’m back for Christmas with your family.”

“I know but still.”

“I love you. Let me know how the last two weeks of rehab go babe. I’m really proud of you.”

“I love you too.”

We kissed one last time before he headed out the door. I was incredibly sad that Harry was going to England. He had some work that needed done with the band and I understood that. However, I was in a part time rehab program. I spent the first few weeks in the facility and when they saw fit I was allowed to move back home and return to normal life. I went into the center once a week to check my progress. I wasn’t completely weaned off of Xanax yet, but we were getting there. Harry had been my rock through the entire process and to see him go right before I would finish up was tough. I didn’t want to downward spiral without him around. I know I couldn’t be with him 24/7 but through this entire process I wish I could have been. We knew before I entered the program that he had to return to England for this time period. He had some band things that needed to be taken care of.

I sighed and slouched back into our couch. I wasn’t going to let Harry being away spoil my fun I’ve been having. We really had been getting into all sorts of things, I could still do that without him. But for tonight I think I’d watch Netflix all night.

I picked up my phone, dialing Emily.

“Hello?” I heard her say

“I miss you.”

“I miss you too.”

“When will our paths ever cross again?”

“I hear you’re going to be in England for New Years, is there any truth to that?”

“Yes, there is a lot of truth to that statement.” I smiled.

“Well you see, it happens that my boyfriend and your boyfriend are best friends. It also happens that they are attending the same party on New Years Eve. I also heard that their other friends, Niall, Zayn and Liam will be there. So that means that Liam’s girlfriend, oh excuse me, fiance will be there and Louis’ super sexual looking model girlfriend will be there and someone even mentioned that Harry’s devastatingly alluring lady will be in attendance as well. I hope you can make it.”

“This is why you’re my best friend. I love you.”

“Love you too. Hey question.” She paused.

“Yes?”

“How’s rehab? I haven’t talked to you in a couple weeks.”

“Almost done! They think I’ll be good in about 2 weeks. I won’t have to keep going in once a week. Thanks for being so cool about this.”

“Babe, we all lose our way sometimes. I’m just glad you found yours before it was too late.”

“I know me too. Harry has been so great with everything. I’m glad the press hasn’t found out. I feel like that would have made it so hard. I mean they know something is going on but no one has pinpointed it yet.”

“Yeah, that would make it hard. You know we’re all here for you though, right? Lou included even though he’s a twat usually.”

“He is, but I know that. I love this family I’ve made thanks to Harry. Sorry you guys are stuck with me.”

“Yeah I know, damnit Harold.”

“Oh shut it.”

“Hey babe, I love you but my flights about to board. Call you when I land okay?”

“Sounds perfect. Safe travels.”

“Love you.”

“Love you.” I responded before ending the call.

I really missed Emily, she was my forever best friend now. I still had Kasi and Ana, but they were both so busy anymore. Kasi was splitting her time between here and Columbus due to her boyfriend playing hockey there and Ana had received an amazing job at a world renowned law firm. I was so proud of my girls. But I really missed them. I decided to try and call them and see if they wanted to come over. I tried Ana first.

“Hey it’s Ana Buckheimer, please leave your name, number and a brief message after the tone.” BEEEEEEEEEP.

“Ana, I missss you. Call me back babe.” I sighed hanging up the phone. Time to try Kasi. It rang a few times with no answer, I was about to hang up when she answered.

“Spen! What’s up?”

“Wanna come over and snuggle?”

“Um yes! I’ll be right over!”

“Sounds good.”

We hung up and I couldn’t help but smile. I really needed a good girls night. I hadn’t seen Kasi in ages. She still knew everything that was going on but we were drifting apart. It made me sad but I guess that’s life.

-----------------------------------------

“Alright so I brought wine, but can you do me a favor?”

“What’s up?” I asked as we snuggled into the couch together.

“Well Tim has a game tonight and I promised him I’d watch it. Could we?” She gave me her biggest puppy dog eyes.

“Of course! I want to see your man in action!” I smiled. “What channel?”

“I don’t know. I think it’s on NBC tonight.” she shrugged.

“Were you even going to watch this?”

“YES!” she shouted. “I literally was just sitting home alone, about to watch it.”

“You’re a dork.”

“I’m a dork in love.” she stuck out her tongue. “You go see Harry perform like all the time, what’s the difference?”

“There isn’t one really.” I shrugged.

“Exactly. Tim just happens to be easier to follow when he’s on the road.”

“Yes, much easier.” I said. “How’s he doing this year?”

“Good, he missed a couple weeks with broken fingers but he’s all patched up now. It scares me to death, especially when I’m there. OH! You should come to Columbus with me and catch a game!”

“They aren’t the most winning organization but the atmosphere there is insane. The fans are loyal.”

“You’re really getting into this, aren’t you?”

“Yes! I love the man!”

“I’m really happy for you.”

“And I’m happy for you. When you told me you were going on that lavish trip with Harry I was certain you were coming home engaged.” She smirked.

“I’m not engaged.” I rolled my eyes.

“I’m not the media, you can tell me anything.” She nudged my side.

“I’m serious! He asked, but I said no! I’m not ready for that shit yet.” I laughed. “I’m 20 for goodness sake.”

“Liam and Rachel are engaged.” Kasi stated flatly.

“What’s your point?”

“They’re 20.”

“Liam is 21 and Rachel is 23.”

“Okay so Liam is not even an entire year older than you, who cares?”

“I do!” I sighed, frustrated. “I don’t get why everyone is pushing it! My mom, my friends, his friends, our friends, the media, literally everyone I know is like ‘why is there no ring on your finger?’ I can’t take it anymore! I don’t want to get married. Why can’t people get that. Especially my mother. I’m not ready and it’s as simple as that. It has nothing to do with whether or not I love Harry, because I do immensely. I just have other things I want to do in life before I get married.”

“Whoa. Are you good?” Kasi hugged me.

“Yes, excuse me for a second.” I got up.

I was shaking, physically shaking. I couldn’t understand why people were pushing me and Harry to get married. We were happy being in a relationship, without rings. Sure, Harry would get married as soon as I said I was ready but honestly I never knew when I would be.

I headed down the hall into our bedroom. I found myself in the drawer, digging for my bottle of Xanax. I know I shouldn’t take one if it wasn’t on my scheduled time but I needed it. I would tell my counselor I took it. I didn’t care. I had too.

I made my way back into the living room where Kasi was yelling at the TV.

“Fucking bullshit refs. Open your eyeeees. That was a legal hit! He never left his feet.” She let out an angry sigh. “Game misconduct my ass.”

“Everything okay?” I laughed, sitting back down.

“Games getting ugly as fuck.” She shook her head. “You good?”

“Yeah, sorry.” I shrugged. “Who are they playing?”

“Philadelphia Flyers. Nasty team. They’re so cheap.”

“What number is Tim?” I asked trying to get into it.

“He’s 6.”

“You said something about him not always playing with Columbus, what does that mean?”

“Well he has a two way contract which means he can play in the NHL or for their farm team in the AHL. If he plays in the AHL he’s in Massachusetts, if he’s in the NHL he’s in Columbus. It’s confusing. He’s been called up a lot this season so far so we’ve been in Columbus.”

“Geeze, that’s nuts. I can’t believe you’re dating an NHL player.” I smiled.

“Um, I can’t believe you’re dating fucking One Direction.”

“Yes, all of them.” I laughed rolling my eyes.

“Well like three of them.” She said.

“Three? How so?”

“Well, you’re really dating Harry, you hang out with Zayn all the time, and you’ve fucked Niall, sooooooo basically three.”

“Oh my god! Stop!” I giggled.

“Have you banged Zayn?”

“No why?”

“I read you did on something online. Just verifying what I thought I already knew.”

“No man, we’re just really close. Nothing extra going on there.”

“Good, don’t be a tramp! How’s that Efron punk?”

“We haven’t talked much lately. He’s texted me a few times, but I think Harry got his point across right before we left for Martinique.”

“I’m glad, he’s bad news.” she looked at me.

“Not really but okay.”

“Cocaine Spencer.”

“I knew I shouldn’t have told you.” I rolled my eyes.

“I want you to be safe and healthy!”

“I’m fine now Kas!”

“I know.” She kissed my temple. “Shit!”

“What?” I asked confused.

“Flyers scored and Tim was on the ice. That’s bad for his plus/minus.”

“Look at you throwing out hockey terms like a seasoned veteran. Did Tim know that you basically knew zero about hockey?”

“Yes, he was happy to teach me. He took me skating a couple weeks ago. It was so cute. It was after one of the teams practices.”

“That’s so adorable.”

“I like him.” She giggled, turning her attention back to the TV.

I watched as she rolled her eyes, grumbled, and cheered at her boyfriend on the screen. I had never seen her so happy, not even with the last guy she dated.

“Fuck.” Her face paled.

“What did I miss? I was day dreaming?”

“Tim just took a really nasty hit.” She quickly stood up.

“Is he okay? Are you okay?”

“I don’t know and I don’t know.” She began pacing the room. “Get up, get up, get up.”

“He’s going to be okay, I promise.”

“He’s not getting up Spencer!”

“I know, they’re getting a sketcher to help him.”

“That’s so bad. Oh my god.” I embraced my friend in a hug as her tears started to fall. “Spencer, what if he’s not okay?”

“He will be. Maybe he’ll miss a few games but he’ll be okay.”

“I can’t handle this.” She said, plopping down.

“Did you see that? He waved to the crowd, he’s fine.”

“But he barely waved. He looks so rattled.”

“Just calm down and wait to hear from him.”

“Can we get into that wine now?”

“Yes, I’ll grab you a glass.”

I carried two glasses and the bottle back into the living room with me. I figured she’d be needing more than one. I knew I wasn’t supposed to drink until the program was over but I wasn’t about to leave my best friend, who just watched her boyfriend get slammed on the TV, to drink by herself.

-----------------------

“NO!” Kasi laughed harder than I’ve seen anyone laugh.

We were finished with Kasi’s bottle of wine and opened one of Harry and mines. I didn’t like to open ours because we had to have someone else buy it for us and it was a pain but the occasion called. Kasi still hadn’t heard from Tim or anyone from the organization so I figured getting her drunk was the only was to calm her down. I was matching one glass to her every two.

“Why not?” I laughed with her.

“I’m not telling you how big my boyfriends penis is!”

“YOU FORCED ME TO TELL YOU ABOUT HARRY.....AND NIALL FOR THAT MATTER!”

“So?”

“So tell me bitch!” I giggled, pouring myself another glass as her phone began to ring.

“Hello?” She answered, sobering up quickly. “Yes, okay....” she paused. “So what does that mean? Okay, yes.” Another pause. “As early as tomorrow. Yes, thank you.”

She hung up. “So?”

“He’s in the hospital in Philly. He has a concussion, broken ribs, broken jaw, dislocated shoulder and a torn ligament in his arm.”

“Oh my god. I didn’t think it looked that bad.”

“Me either.”

“So what does all of that mean for you?”

“Well that was his coach, Tim asked for me to come to Philadelphia because they have to do emergency surgery on his arm tonight. I said I could be there in the morning because I’m hammered.”

“That’s smart. You can sleep here and then leave tomorrow.”

“Shit, I’m scared.”

“Well at least you know he’s at least going to make a full recovery.”

“I know. I knew that hockey players got hurt, but I never thought it would happen to my Tim.” I watched as more tears fell down her face.

“Let’s get to sleep. We can cuddle.”

“I call little spoon!” She perked up.

“Fine.”

“Wait, did you and Harry bang in your bed recently?”

“Why?” I rolled my eyes.

“Well I don’t want to sleep in Harry’s jizz.”

“Kasi, we use condoms, the jizz goes in there and then the garbage.”

“Okay fine, but I’m sleeping on your side.”

“Deal.”

I helped her get into our bedroom and change into some of my PJs. After she was tucked in, I went to make sure the apartment was locked up. Harry should be calling me sometime in the super early morning so I made sure I had my phone on loud. I crawled into bed and snuggled in tight. I had missed Kasi so much. She’d always be my best friend.

------------------------------

Later that week

(Harry POV)

“Okay lads, from the top.”

“I can’t sing this one more time.” Liam groaned, leaving the room.

“Is he okay?” Niall asked.

“Rachel wants to get married before we put the album out and go back on tour.” Louis added. “He’s been super stressed out.”

“Man we drop the album in like 5 months and then tour starts the next month. She thinks they can plan a wedding that fast?” Niall pondered.

“I don’t know. I mean normal people might be able too, but Li’s got too much other shit to worry about.”

“She should just wait until after our next tour.”

“That won’t be for like a year and a half, maybe more.” I added.

“Who cares, the blokes going to lose his brain.” Louis said.

“True, maybe I’ll have Spencer call her.” I said.

“Good, I’ll tell Emily too.”

“Sorry guys, I’m just so stressed out.” Liam came back in.

“We understand mate.” I patted him on his back. “We’ll have a chat with the girls and see if they can get Rach to lay off until after the tour.”

“Thanks. When we talked about the wedding we agreed to wait a couple years before we had it. That’s when I figured our schedule was most free. She agreed but all of a sudden she wants to rush it.”

“Dude.” Zayn said randomly. “She’s pregnant.”

“No she isn’t, I asked because I thought that could have been it too.” Liam ran a hand through his normally perfectly kept hair.

“Guys, we’ll just call it a day today. You’ve put in a lot of good work today.” Our studio manager said.

“Alright, see you tomorrow.” We all shook his hand before heading out to the elevator.

“Someone call Jack and tell him we want to go to Nandos.” Niall laughed.

“You call him then!” Liam joked.

“Fine, I will.” Niall rolled his eyes as we got on the lift.

“I’ll be right back.” I said heading down the hallway as we hit ground level.

“Booty calls.” I hear Louis say as I walked away.

He wasn’t wrong though, I was just going to call Spencer and see what she was up too. It only rang twice before she answered.

“Hey baby!” She answered cheerfully.

“Hey, what’s going on?”

“Well, I just finished with Dr. Clark. He’s certain only one more week!” She cheered.

“Babe! I’m so proud of you.” I smiled glad her life was finally back on track. “Anything else?”

“Just on my way to Philadelphia.” she sighed.

“He’s still in the hospital?” I asked.

“Yes and Kasi refuses to leave. Ana and I have been taking turns going down and staying with her. We take her clothes and force her to eat. I mean he’s just recovering from surgery but apparently he can’t fly yet. I don’t see why they don’t just drive him back. Columbus isn’t that far.”

Spencer had told me about the horrific hit that had landed Kasi’s boyfriend in the hospital. I never really understood the fuss over hockey.

“You’re a great friend, you know that right?” I said.

“She would do the exact same thing for me if it was us.”

“I know she would.” I smiled thinking about how great her friends were. “I’m glad you have friends like Kasi and Ana.”

“Me too.” She sighed. “Anyways enough about me, what’s up?”

“Lads and I were just in the studio. We’ve been here all bloody day though. We’re all super stressed out so we cut it short today.”

“Getting anything good done?”

“Yeah, we’ve actually recorded two songs in a week.”

“I’m so happy you get to do this, even if it means we have to be apart.”

“Yeah, it sucks not having sex daily.” I joked.

“Same.” She laughed.

“I guess that’s what we get for doing it every day for the last month before I left.”

“You’re spoiled.” I could tell she was rolling her eyes.

“Yes I am, and I love you for it. But you’re no better.”

“I know. You’re perfect.”

“Well me and the guys are gonna grab some dinner, I’ll call you before I go to bed.”

“Okay, be safe.”

“Babe, you be safe. You’re the one driving.”

“I always am!” She shouted.

“I know, I love you.”

“I love you too.”

I hung up and jogged back towards the guy.

“Everything okay?” Liam asked.

“Yeah, she’s just driving down to Philadelphia again.”

“He’s still in there?” Liam asked, concerned.

“Yeah, I guess he can’t fly yet and he’s still in there for surgery or something.” I shrugged.

“Dude got hit hard.” Zayn said.

“Someone give him a joint and he’ll be fine.” Louis laughed.

“Dude.” Zayn said.

“Yes?” I laughed.

“Let’s go get baked.” He said serious as ever.

“Bakery? Yes, we can stop there after Nandos.” Niall laughed.

“Dear lord, you and you’re damn food.” Louis said shaking his head.

We all headed outside into the ocean of screaming fans. All of guys went over to the fence and signed things, taking pictures. I went straight for the van. I couldn’t help but think Spencer seemed a little distracted. Sure, her best friends boyfriend was in serious condition in the hospital, but something wasn’t right. I didn’t want to call her back but I had too. I stood outside the van, waiting for her to answer.

“Harry?” She answered.

“Are you okay?” I blurted out.

“Yes, why?”

“You seem distant, distracted, whatever.” I said.

“I’m fine, just worried.”

“About Tim?”

“Yes and about me.”

“Why babe?”

“I can’t say. I don’t want to fight.”

“Spencer, what happened?” I sighed, running a hand through my hair.

I knew I shouldn’t be having this conversation outside in front of cameras, but no one could hear what I was saying. They could only see how I was reacting.

“I’ve been taking more Xanax than I should.”

“Why?”

“Well with this whole Tim thing, and you being gone in my last two weeks... I’m a mess.”

I don’t even think that was a full sentence but I was questioning her. “Did you tell Dr. Clark?”

“No.”

“Spencer, why not?”

“Because I want to be done with that place! If I tell him that, I’ll be extended.”

“Maybe you need that.”

“NO! Don’t you dare try and tell me what I need after I’ve done everything you’ve asked me to do!”

“Spencer, I want the best for you! If you keep taking these pills you aren’t moving forward!”

“Fuck! This is exactly why I didn’t want to tell you!”

“Do what you want.” I said abruptly.

“I am! And I will!”

“Spencer, I didn’t mean that.”

“I know you didn’t. I just don’t think you understand what I’m really going through. I’m alone when I need you most. I know I can’t ask you come back here because you’re working but it’s just so hard. Then Tim happened. So I dealt with it the only way I knew how too!”

“Call Dr. Clark and tell him or I will.” I said flatly.

“YOU WOULDN’T DARE!” She yelled.

“Watch me.”

“If I find out you called him, I will leave you.”

“You’re going to break up with me over drugs?” I threw the hand not holding the phone in the air.

“Yes.”

“I have to go.”

“Right, just leave me alone like you always do.”

“Are you kidding me? Like I always do? I’m pretty sure we’ve been together for the past at least 3 months. We live together, we eat together, we shop together, we party together, we do everything but work together. How can you say that?”

“I just really need you.” She cried. Shit, now I’ve made her cry.

“Babe, I understand that. And I’m really sorry that this didn’t line up any better. I will be home in a week and we can sort things out. I promise.”

“Fine.” She snapped.

“I don’t know what else you want me to do.” I sighed, dragging a hand down my face.

“I love you.” She hung up. Even if she hung up on me, she always made sure I knew she loved me.

“FUCK.” I yelled probably a little too loud. I made my way over to the rest of the guys and began to sign things for fans.

“Are you okay?” one girl asked.

“Yes! Great!” I put on my best faked smile. Beside me, Louis snorted. I nudged him in the elbow.

“It just looked like you were yelling at whoever you were on the phone with.” Well isn’t she a nebby little shit.

“Nope, I’m fine.” I smiled. I moved on.

“Are you still dating Spencer?” another girl asked.

“Happily.” I said.

“You guys are so cute!” she smiled.

“Thank you.”

We finished signing as much as we could before plowing into the van. As soon as the door shut Louis was on me.

“What is it mate?” He asked.

“Spencer.” I rolled my eyes.

“Obviously.”

“She’s picked up her usage again and refuses to tell the doctor because she’s afraid it will extend her time at the center.” I sighed.

“It definitely will.” He added.

“Mate, she needs to be in the center until she’s 100% clean.” Liam added.

“I know, but she won’t agree to do that. I’m happy I got her to do this.”

“True, she’s a stubborn one.” Niall pitched in.

“We all know that.” Everyone laughed.

“Hopefully she’ll smarten up and tell him.” Liam clapped me on the back.

“Yes we could only hope.” I looked out the window.

Since when did life get so frustrating and hard?

Notes

Sorry if there are a lot of typos in this. It's 330 AM here and I'm dead.

Told you guys I was about to skip a bunch of time. This is setting up the next chapter which is just a complete shit show.

LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK... OKAY THANK YOU.

love you xx