A life of Payne
I couldn't delay it any longer.
It was time to talk to Katie.
I still can't believe that I just stood there shocked and speechless when she told me she was pregnant, I should have done something right then and there but it's better late than never.
Katie needs to know that I'm not going anywhere.
That baby needs a daddy and that's me.
Taking one last deep breath, I knocked on the front door of Liam and Katie's apartment and within seconds it swung open to reveal a hopeful looking Liam who's eyes dulled once he saw that it was me.
"What the hell do you want?!" He spat while attempting to push the door closed but I stuck my foot out so that he couldn't close it.
It hurt like hell but I needed to get to Katie.
"I need to talk to my girlfriend." I spoke calmly and he glared at me and let out a low growl.
The awkward silence between us has never been this horrible.
"She's my sister before anything else and you're too late anyway." He snapped and shoved my chest to make me back away from the door.
"We're suppose to be friends Liam! So please, just god dammit help me save my relationship!"
I let out a long sigh after my rant as Liam's eyes softened.
"We stopped being friends when you slept with my sister." He mumbled as if he didn't want me to hear it.
"And here I was thinking we stopped being friends when you found out Katie was pregnant." I shot back and his eyes widened.
His posture changed as he stared at me with more pain and sympathy than before.
"You haven't figured everything out yet have you?" He whispered lowly as he crossed his arms in front of his chest and looked down in shame.
I looked at him confused, I wasn't really sure what to say which just caused the awkward tension to rise.
He looked back up at me and sighed heavily.
"Look, I'm only telling you this because I feel sorry for you, but Katie isn't here. She ran off about two hours ago."
"Well did she say where she was going?!" I panicked slightly as I thought about how lost and helpless Katie could be right now.
"She said she went to see Ashley." He mumbled and I sighed in relief knowing that she was safe.
"Doesn't Ashley live with Harry?" I asked after a few minutes and grew confused again at how he couldn't know if she was okay when one of his band mates lives in the house that she had run off too.
"Harry left like ten minutes ago to check on her, I'm just waiting for him to call me."
I nodded as we both stood there, in the hall, in silence.
I think it's safe to say Liam isn't my biggest fan right now.
Thankfully the sound of Liam's phone cut between the thick air and he let out a visible sigh as he checked the caller ID before answering.
"Harry... Please tell me she's okay."
I heard the sound of Harry's laugh through the phone before some mumbling as he said something to Liam which obviously he didn't like as his face turned cold again.
"Of course I care if she's alright! She's my baby sister and just because I raised my voice at her doesn't mean I stopped caring!"
My attention snapped from the floor as I glared up at Liam.
"You yelled at her?!" I harshly whispered and he returned my glare with an even harsher one.
"Shut the fuck up Calum!" He snapped before returning his attention back to his phone.
"So is she okay?" He asked Harry and judging by his face, it was more bad news.
"WHAT?! Where the hell are the girls then Harry if their not at your house?!"
My eyes widened as my thoughts about Katie being lost and scared came back to the front of my mind.
Liam continued to yell at Harry through his phone as I started to pace around the empty hallway while running my hands through my hair in thought.
She has to be somewhere that she knew no one would look...
But where the hell would that be?
I stopped abruptly in my tracks as I put it together, I quickly looked over my shoulder to see that Liam was still angrily yelling into his phone and had his back to me.
Before Liam could even turn around or shut the door to his apartment, I was off and in the direction of the one possible place that Katie and Ashley could be.
Lets just hope I can fix this.
"Do I seriously have to do this?" I whined as Ashley held the pregnancy stick box in my direction.
It is just gross having to pee on a stick and then hold afterwards as you wait for the results.
"Yes Katie you do! You're going in a downwards spiral, don't you want to at least know if it's all for something or someone rather than nothing?"
I groaned at her logical thinking before standing from the old couch and snatching the test out of her hands on my way past her.
"I seriously hate you right now!" I yelled over my shoulder as I slammed the bathroom door shut.
I sighed as I looked down at the box in my hands and cringed at the thought of this all becoming official.
"That's just the hormones talking!" She yelled back through the door and I growled knowing she was right outside the door and that I couldn't do anything with her standing there.
"I can't pee with you right outside the door!" I snapped and instantly regretted it as I knew she was just trying to help.
Eventually I heard her footsteps fade away and sat down to take the horrid test.
After I was done, I washed my hands three times hoping it would kill some time since the box said I had to wait around five minutes for the results. Sadly I still felt like I was waiting an eternity before the stick finally grew two pink lines in the little window.
I quickly dropped the stick and scrambled to pick the box back up as I searched for what two lines meant.
"Fuck!" I screamed as the reality hit me.
"What?! What did the test say?!" Ashley panicked as she came bursting through the door in a matter of seconds but instantly knew the answer as I groaned in a mixture of pain and sadness.
"Oh sweetie, it's going to be okay." She attempted to soothe me as she wrapped her arms around my shoulders but all I could do was cry.
Nothing about this was going to be okay!
For the past twenty four hours, the only thing that kept me from breaking point was knowing that nothing was for certain.
But now it is and I don't know what to do.
I had a feeling I should say something, or at least thank Ash for being here for me but before I could there was a loud and impatient knock at the front door.
We both looked at each other panicked realizing that someone had figured out where we're hiding.
Rather than waiting for the argument of who should open the door, I stumbled my way towards it and let out a pained whimper as I swung it open to became face to face with Calum.
My eyes widened in horror as I wasn't ready to talk about this with him yet.
"I can't do this right now." I managed to choke out as I did my best to hold my emotions in but it wasn't working very well.
"Can I at least come inside?" He asked quietly and rather calmly so I nodded numbly and opened the door wider for him.
I closed the door softly and followed him over to the old couch where we both sat quietly and thought intensely about what to say but never actually tried to communicate.
Maybe things weren't going to be so easy between us.
And here I was thinking that my relationship might actually be stable during this whole thing.
Finally I chose to break the silence as it didn't look like he was going too.
"How did you know where to find me?" I asked in just above a whisper and he let out a small sigh as some of the tension disappeared, but not much of it.
"I figured that you wouldn't want Liam to find you and would probably be somewhere he least expected you to be, so I guess Ashley's old apartment just seemed like the best bet."
He was spot on.
I honestly didn't think anyone would look here.
His gaze was trained on me and I begun to shake with how nervous I was becoming. I turned away and did my best to ready my breathing but no matter how hard I tried, the only thing I could hear in my head was the sound of my own conscience mocking me with the fact that Calum might possibly be father or he might not be.
"You know, this place was broken into, which is why Ashley moved out. I don't really think it's a good idea for you girls to be back here." He stated causally as if he was trying to start a conversation.
My bottom lip quivered as I tried hard to control myself and not have another case of word vomit, but unlucky for me, the words came tumbling out of my mouth before I could process them.
"The baby might be Niall's."
As soon as I realized what I had done, I looked up at him to see his eyes squeezed shut like he was trying to warn off tears. He shook his head and rubbed his hand harshly over his forehead like he was in pain just because of my five lettered sentence.
"Y-you cheated on me?" His voice cried out and I let out a loud sob before covering my mouth with the back of my hand.
I shook my head realizing that the only possible time I could have slept with Niall was before we were officially together.
"So... it was when I wasn't here? When I was still in Australia?"
I nodded this time as I looked down in shame. There was only one possible way he could take this and it wasn't going to end well, I could just feel it.
"Why? I thought we felt the same way about each other."
"I do Calum, I really do. Even being drunk is no excuse and I don't understand how I could've let that happen." I sobbed out as he stood up swiftly and paced around the small lounge room.
Eventually he sighed and shook his head before quickly sitting down next to me again. He placed one hand on my stomach and pushed his lips onto mine in an urgent kiss.
I lazily pushed him away as I barely had anything in me to fight him.
"We can work through this baby girl. I know we can."
My mind fought with my heart as I tried my hardest to believe his words but I just couldn't.
"I-I can't Calum. I've screwed up too many times and I need to fix this on my own."
His eyes widened as he looked at me in the most hurt way possible. Like I had just killed a puppy in front of him.
"So you just going to break up with me?"
"I don't want too but what choice do I have! I'm a broken mess right now!"
I jerked away from him as he tried to take hold of my hand and stood up to slowly walk over to the door.
When I finally grew the courage to turn and look at him, his eyes were begging me to change my mind but it was too late.
I felt like my heart had just been torn in two but he deserved better than me.
After a few more minutes of complete silence, he stood up and walked straight out the door without another word. He didn't even attempt to make eye contact with me as he walked past and I knew right then that I would forever regret the move I had just made.
"Are you okay?" Ashley whispered softly after a few minutes and I jumped as I spun around to face her sympathetic eyes.
"Not really I just want to be alone for a while." I whispered and walked away to the bedroom.
I sat on the edge of the soft bed and immediately cried in sympathy for myself.
Life is never going to be the same without Calum.
After hearing Katie cry herself to sleep it had become clear what I had to do.
Which was to stick by my best friend.
No matter what.
"You can do this." I encouraged myself as I stood on mine and Harry's doorstep.
I let out a shaky breath as I knocked some what softly then stumbled back a few steps.
The door swung open in a matter of seconds and Harry let out a visible sigh of relief as he pulled me in for a hug.
"Babe!" He breathed out while peppering my neck with kisses.
I squeezed my eyes shut as I did my best to ignore his affection.
Pretending like I didn't care just made it easier to deal with what I was about to do.
"I n-need to talk to you." I stuttered out and watched as he pulled away from from me with a frown sketched into his face.
"Ashley, you're scaring me." He mumbled and I continued to painfully ignore his eye contact that he was trying to make.
Something told me that Katie was smart to make Calum sit down when she went through this just hours ago so I took hold of Harry's hand and lead him over to the large sofa before gently pushing him to sit down.
"Talk to me baby." He pleaded as I stood with my back to him and tried to prepare the words in my head but was distracted when I felt his large hands firmly take hold of my hips and turn me to face him.
When I didn't say anything back to him, he sighed and let his head fall onto my stomach as I continued to stand in between his legs and softly run my fingers through his hair.
"How's Katie doing?" He asked quietly and I held back a scoff at the possible happy tone laced through his voice and I could tell he thought she was doing better when she wasn't.
"Recently single." I replied coldly and felt him tense against me.
"And you're choosing her over me aren't you?"
It pained me so much to have to make this choice but I couldn't be in a relationship with someone who my best friend hated with a passion right now.
The whole sisters before misters thing.
"She told me that you were the one who told her about the Niall thing, she honestly hates you so much for telling her that."
He moved away from me and stood up to his full and intimidating height.
"I thought I was doing the right thing." He bit at me and I scoffed while punching his shoulder.
"You ruined her relationship." I stated as a matter of fact, he shook his head at my words and groaned in frustration.
"I was just telling her what no one else had even considered too. Doesn't that make me the good guy?"
I sniffled slightly and looked down at the ground as my nerves finally caught up to me and my brain was begging me to stop talking.
But I couldn't give up now.
"Look, the point is that Katie now has to raise that baby by herself and rather than it having two possible dads, it now has none. Katie doesn't trust any of you and I can't turn my back on her when she needs me."
He didn't respond to my statement and just stared at me with his pleading eyes. I turned away from him as soon as I felt the first tear fall down my cheek and took a few small steps in the direction of the front door.
"Babe please wait." I ignored his strained words and continued to slowly walk towards the front door when I stopped in my tracks because of his next words.
"I love you."
My body was stiff and I physically felt like I couldn't turn around to him.
He had never said that to me before, but I don't think I could be with someone who only said that to me when we're in the worst situations.
"Please make sure you're not here when I pick up my things."
And with that last sentence, I walked completely out the front door not once daring to look back at him.
Harry was a great guy.
But Katie was a best friend.
I'm so sorry this took so long! I had no wifi for two weeks! The there was my uni classes being crazy and of course Zayn...
It's been a shitty and loveless month so this chapter was surprisingly easy to type.
What do you girls think of it?
Let me know! xx