Loose Change (Harry Styles) [BOOK 2]

Harry's POV
My mum used to tell me many things that would help guide me throughout life peacefully. She always told me that an organized life leads to an organized wife, that what goes around comes around, and other important motherly things. The thing I remember though the most is when she told me how the truth sets you free. But what she didn't notify me was that it sets the person the truth was told to free, while the teller just remains locked in the confinement of their own guilt.
She's free of me, even though I most likely forever shall be locked on her, she's free. And that's the most important thing.
I never should've done the plan in the first place. I never should've interfered in her life. I never should've gone to that fucking park that day.
I feel myself hit the side of my steering wheel as I navigate myself to the parking lot of her father's apartment. My face still hurts from the blow I received from him, but hey I deserved it and anyway I have to tell him what occurred last night when I confessed everything to his daughter. Now he can finally be at peace with her and they can begin picking up the pieces of their relationship.
After this...after these final few days, I'm going to be gone from Virginia and far away from her when the boys and I finally begin our tour in Europe. I've hurt her so many times, have caused so much pain, but I'm tired of acting like a sadist. I want to be a hero. I want to save someone for once. Every person I meet that comes in contact with me ends up like Skylar. They may not be dead physically, but I kill them. I butcher their insides and I just leave them there in the depth of their own utter desperation and despair, just unintentionally suffocating them with my own dilemmas.
I haven't eaten breakfast yet and have in fact not eaten in a few days, but I don't have time for that yet. I need to finish everything I promised Jane and her father before I can finally sit down. I have to help her, no matter what the costs are. I need to finish what I began.
Once I get out of my car and to his front door, I knock weakly.
"Ted. It's me again." I say through the door.
Nothing. And I know he's here because his car is fucking parked right outside.
"Ted. I know you're in there. I have to tell you something important please." I try again, knocking a little louder.
It's ten in the morning and if this guy is not sleeping and is just avoiding me th-
"What is it kid? I thought our conversation ended when I punched the shit out of you. Or do you need me to remind you?" He says through gritted teeth, wearing only a plain white t-shirt and blue plaid boxers.
"I need to talk to you." I say as I let myself in, placing my hands in my pockets.
"Hey, who said you could come in?" He comments as he crosses his arms over his chest. The dark circles under his eyes have darkened in color and man he looks like shit.
I roll my eyes as I sit myself down on the couch.
"You're kidding right? Do I need to remind you that I am the one that pays for this. So I could even sleep here if I wanted to." I fight back, crossing my own arms.
He closes and locks the door behind him before stomping himself up to me and bending down to my level to seem intimidating.
"Don't even try me kid. I have a lot on my fucking mind right now and I don't really feel like beating the shit out of you so why don't you do both of us a favor and leave." He whispers with his eyebrows furrowed together and his bad morning breath hitting my face.
I align my back, sitting myself forward to show him that I could give less of a crap of how much he's flaring his nostrils, that he won't ever scare me.
"Look. First, stop calling me a kid. I'm fucking twenty one years old not twelve and you need to listen to me for just a second." I say in a stern voice, not having the strength to fight him.
"Why should I listen to you? You gave up on the plan completely for that slut bag art chic, leaving my daughter and letting her down an-"
"I fucking love Jane alright! I would never cheat on her or do anything to hurt her on purpose, I-"
"You're not even together and if you love her so much then prove it!"
I clench my fists and I feel my face beginning to redden from anger and frustration as I push myself up, now standing right in front of the stubborn man.
"IF YOU WOULD HAVE LET ME FUCKING FINISHED TELLING YOU YESTERDAY INSTEAD OF CREATING YOUR OWN CONCLUSIONS THEN- then-
I begin losing my balance as I begin to feel a little light headed and I struggle to stand up.
"Hey. Are you alright? I didn't punch that hard yesterday did I?" Ted asks, his tone calmer as he places his hands on my shoulders and sits me back down on the couch, placing a pillow for the back of my head to rest on.
I nod my head in thanks as well as snort due to his comment.
"Nah you wish." I state.
He rolls his eyes and bends down again.
"When was the last time you've eaten?" He questions in complete seriousness.
I shrug, feeling my eyes beginning to close.
"Hey, answer me. Don't close your eyes." He adds as I feel him tap the sides of my face lightly, waking me up.
"Maybe eight or nine days, I'm not really sure." I admit truthfully as I pull the pillow closer to me.
His eyes narrow and he just stares at me in disbelief before standing up straight.
"Wait there. Don't move." He says before turning around and walking away.
"But I-"
"Don't fucking move Styles." He commands without looking back.
I feel myself huff before placing my hand over my face, rubbing it up and down to make sure I don't pass out. I don't have time for that and anyways I don't know what the hell Ted would do to me if I did.
He quickly comes back holding a glass of water in one hand and a granola bar in the other.
"Sorry. I would give you more, but I haven't gone grocery shopping in a while." He says as he hands me both of the items.
I shake my head as I sit myself up, not accepting them.
"No it's fine, I'm no-"
"Don't give me that crap and eat. I know how it feels to not eat for a week and you as well as I know that you're starving. Jane already fainted on me, I don't need another one to black out so just take it."
I stare at him for a second before sighing and giving in as I take the items, resting the cup on the floor and beginning to unwrap the snack bar.
"Now do you want to tell me why you haven't eaten in eight days." He states as he sits in the gray couch chair close by.
I take a bite and I can't help but close my eyes as I feel something enter my stomach. God, this tastes delicious.
"Harry."
I open my eyes quickly and I clear my throat as I glance over at him. I just shrug, not really knowing how to respond.
"Didn't have the time." I simply reply before taking another bite.
"Didn't have time? What were you doing, finding the cure for cancer or something?" He states in a sarcastic tone with one raised eyebrow in curiosity.
I finish the bar in only three bites and I begin to crumple the wrapper into a ball before turning my body to grab the cup, taking big sips.
"I've been trying to contact this art woman for Jane."
His face softens and he stares passed me at the wall for a second in thought before turning his attention back to me.
"Who?"
"The mother of the slut bag art chic." I retort coldly, rolling my eyes again.
He stays silent for a while before finally getting up and walking towards me, reaching out his hand.
He grabs the wrapper from my hand as well as the empty cup and walks back to the kitchen I'm guessing before returning again empty handed, sitting back in his seat.
He places his elbows on his knees and drops his face into his hands, rubbing it up and down before taking a deep breath and sitting back up. Ted seems pretty exhausted and by the way his skin has gotten paler and how his face is unshaved, he most likely hasn't slept in days. Same Ted. Same.
"You really care about her don't you?" He whispers.
I put my elbows on my own knees and I hold my face in my hands as I look at him.
He nods a little.
"This was never a part of the plan you know." He comments, now staring at the floor.
"I know. And I never intended it to be."
"What happened between you two while I was gone?"
This time his blue eyes meet me, and they're not filled with hatred or any form of threat, but filled with a sense of curiosity and respect.
I chuckle a little as the many memories of Jane and I begin to unravel themselves in my mind in their own little art exhibit. Because no matter how cheesy it sounds, our bond is like art to me. Even though no one may understand it, us the painters know the true meaning behind it.
"It's hard to explain." I say, observing the glass coffee table in front of me.
"Try me."
I take a deep breath as her face now appears in front of me like a hallucination.
"Whenever I was with her, I was never sure if I was dreaming or not. I even have had to pinch myself a few times just to make sure."
I chuckle a little at my foolishness, but soon feel my smile fade as my eyes narrow in concentration on the glass of the table reflecting light from the light bulb above, giving it an almost blinding gleam.
"She's like my dreamcatcher." I say self consciously, not even realizing what I just announced.
"How so?"
"A dreamcatcher catches your nightmares and makes sure that you're always dreaming all the time. It protects a person from their fears, from themselves...."
"What are yours about? Your nightmares." He asks throwing me a little off guard.
"Everything. I mean I have one everyday, because life is really just one big nightmare isn't it? You just are constantly afraid of everything until finally after years of being scared, you wake up and you're in that place known as paradise." I mutter, realizing for myself just how deep I really am for his daughter.
"She's a dream within a nightmare." I add.
"Then why did you tell her? Why did you just let her go?"
I look over at him feeling slightly bewildered, seeing how he's just smiling softly.
"What? How did you know I-"
"Katherine called me last night. You aren't the only one that has been keeping tabs on her for me you know."
Katherine. That old lady who hates my guts more than this man has known the whole time. How did I not figure it out?
I would usually scream at him right now for actually telling someone of our whole deal and for also not notifying me about it, but I know he only did it to make sure his daughter is safe, so I bite my tongue. This time.
"She deserves a better life. And to get that, I need to get rid of myself from hers. Besides, there's this guy that loves her and he's so simple. And that's what she needs. Something simple. And Katherine told me that she's seeing him for breakfast for a surprise or some shit. He's probably going to ask her out or something." I answer his question from before, feeling my mood beginning to eat itself until there's nothing left.
After a few seconds of silence I glance up to see how Ted's face has whitened at my words and his eyes are widened.
"What? What is it?" I ask.
He quickly gets up and walks over to me in a frantic like state, making me feel nervous.
"What guy Harry? Who? Who is he!?!" He questions, shaking me in a panic.
"Aiden. His name's Aiden. Why?"
He releases me from his grip and turns around, tangling his fingers through his hair violently. I wouldn't be surprised if he pulls out some hair in the process.
"Fuck! I told that little shit to not go near her again and he-"
He walks to one of the walls and slams his fist against it out of frustration, causing me to stand up.
"Fuck him!" He yells.
What does he have against Aiden? Why did he tell him to not go near her? I mean he told me to do the same thing, but he wasn't this pissed when I went against his wishes.
"Ted what the fuck is going on!?" I comment as I walk over to him, placing my hands on his shoulders and turning him around.
He looks up at me and his eyes instantly glow in realization.
"You need to go to her now! You have to get her away from him! Is his father back in town too?! That little shit must have found out about our plan, that I'm back or-"
"LISTEN!" I shout, hoping that he will calm the fuck down and answer all the questions that are beginning to freaking envelope my mind.
His body calms a little as he turns his attention back to me, breathing quite rapidly. God, I now know where Jane gets that from.
"I thought Aiden was her best friend. She told me how you two stayed at his father's apartment in hiding and that you two were close. I'm not going anywhere until you tell me everything." I hold my ground, my hands still gripping his shoulders.
He sighs before shaking my hands off of him and pacing back and forth for a while.
"What has she told you?"
I lean my body against the wall, my hands in my pockets as I stare at the very overwrought man.
"She told me how men were after you and your family because of some drug thing you were framed for and how Aiden's dad who was your closest friend assisted in helping you two hide." I tell him all I remember, which I think is pretty much everything.
He soon stops pacing and just begins to nod, his eyes focused on the wooden floor beneath his white socked feet.
"That's what I assumed she knew." He whispers, speaking his thoughts.
"What I'm about to tell you Harry is very confidential and must never ever be repeated. Please. I'm trusting you here. Jane doesn't even know this." His blue eyes look over at me and I just gulp before nodding my head seriously.
"I swear."
He just nods quickly before biting his lip.
"I wasn't framed for selling drugs... I actually did sell them." He begins, sounding more than ashamed of himself.
I don't judge the man because first off, even though he's only telling me this because I refuse to stop Aiden unless I know more, he's still trusting me and I'm not going to make him feel more shitty than he already feels. And second, I've done bad shit too and if Jane didn't judge me for my past, I shouldn't judge others based on theirs.
I just nod my head, motioning him to continue and he just walks to the sturdy glass table, sitting himself down before speaking again.
"I owned an oil company you see, and at first we were finding oil left and right. It was like a black gold mine, but then little by little, we couldn't find as much anymore. Employees began quitting and we couldn't afford to fix or buy new drilling machines and at the same time drugs like marijuana and cocaine started becoming more costly."
He begins fiddling with his fingers, gaping at them as he tries to remember.
"Many corrupt business men that I knew were in the business and many of their falling companies were saved by this new market. So I invested myself in it as well, quickly making money and reclaiming everything I have lost or was at risk of losing."
"What does this have to do with Aiden and his father?" I ask.
"I'm getting there."
I begin playing with some loose change in my pocket anxiously, trying to calm myself down.
"Jerry had been my best friend since college. We both attended Yale and from then on grew a friendship. He was even there at Jane's birth and I was there for Aiden's. He was a very successful lawyer but ended up investing all of his money in stocks and his life as well as his family's was dependant on those rising arrows. He began losing money as well and wanted to deal like me."
He begins shaking his head and I can tell that he is a deep thinker like Jane, reliving the nightmare of his life deteriorating from him and watching as it affected his family. I don't know what I would do with myself if I were in his shoes.
"It had already began ruining my relationship with my wife Claire, and I just didn't want him to get into it. I mean he was such a great lawyer. He could've gone back to that, but Jerry is the type of guy that if you tell him he can't have something, he just wants it even more. And that was the problem. He was obsessed with it. I mean I just did it for the money, but he did it for the thrill, for the ride. He would even take his business over the border illegally, leaving his child and wife behind. They were always alone and the only people they really had were us."
"That's why Aiden and Jane were so close." I say, catching on a little.
He nods.
"Aiden was an introverted child, never socializing with anyone but Jane and his mother. He would get bullied and pushed around. Jane was the only one that showed him any form of kindness. And since his father was never there, he grew major daddy issues, pretty much hating any male that breathed."
I feel myself lift an eyebrow in confusion. I mean he did talk to me on Christmas quite comfortably and was aquainted with Gemma's boyfriend pretty quick. He probably just grew some balls and got over it I guess.
"What happened with Jerry?" I ask, this story interesting me sadly.
"One of his maids snitched on him to the cops and word got out fast. I covered for him of course since my conscience was telling me how I should turn myself in anyway, but when Jerry returned from Mexico, he was pissed. He blamed me for everything that has happened to him. He blamed me for his wife filing a divorce, for his new drug addiction, and for even introducing him to the dealing market in the first place."
"What the fuck. But you tried stopping him. It was all his fault that prick." I comment. Even though I haven't met Aiden's father, I already want to bash his face in.
Ted just shrugs.
"He wouldn't listen to me. I lost my friend that day. And the thing is that I wanted to go to jail. I felt that it would do me good and teach me some responsibility, but my lawyer wouldn't allow it. This case was popular and he got many calls soon after we won, making an even bigger name for himself. He's now on the Supreme Court. The big leagues. And when I won, Jerry just sorta disappeared."
"Where did he go?"
"He was hiding in that same apartment me and Jane were hiding in. Everyone actually thought he was kidnapped or something, but when three guys approached me one night while my family was sleeping, I knew Jerry had something to do with them. Apparently Jerry jipped their boss and were sent to kill him, Jerry leaving them hints leading to me so that they would think I was him. They tried killing me, but I ended up explaining to them and showing them proof how I wasn't him and telling them Jerry's real identity. I betrayed him, but hey, he betrayed me first and I knew that after they killed me they would try hurting Jane and Claire and I cared about them way more than that dick."
This story sounds so fake, as if it were a movie and it's just astonishing to me how this all actually happened. But now as I hear this information about Jerry, I'm even more afraid about what the thing with Aiden is going to be. Was he a drug dealer too? Did he try hurting Jane?
"Were those men the reason why you and Jane went into hiding? And if Jerry was your enemy, why did he help you?"
He just shakes his head, leaving me to be even more lost.
"No. The men that were trying to kill us were Jerry's men. You see, he eventually found out what I did and his men ended up killing them, scaring their boss half to death and he went to visit me again. He told me how he was going to kill me. Explained to me in full detail how he would have his people murder my family in front of me unless..."
"Unless what?!"
He finally looks at me, and his lips separate, trying to find the right words to say.
"Since I apparently ruined his life, he wanted to ruin my own. He made me lie to my wife, to Jane, and to everyone to save his ass. He thought that if he made his wife believe that he was helping me in such a heroic manner, that she wouldn't file the divorce and Aiden would love him again."
"So he put you into hiding, telling everyone that you went missing so he could tell his wife that he was secretly keeping you alive from killers?"
"Yeah."
I slip my hands out of my pocket and I rub my face slowly, trying to just take everything in. It's just so...so fucked up. This world is just...damn.
"But why did Jane's mom leave?"
His eyes begin to gloss and he shuts his eyes closed, obviously hurt by the memory of her.
"I told her that she was a horrible mother. Claire was a prostitute as Jane must've told you. Jerry actually got her for me for my eighteenth birthday, but I didn't do anything to her. She seemed so fragile, so beautiful and I instantly fell in love with her. Like Jane is to you, she was for me. She was my dream catcher. And I didn't want to put her through that. I at least wanted someone to be free from all of my problems that I put on myself. So I told her that she was just unsuited to be a mother and made her feel like shit. I paid her to leave, but she wouldn't take it, she still loved me she said. She loved Jane. So when she went to sleep, I snuck me and Jane out, leaving a check with all the remaining money I had left so she could start a new life for herself. One she deserves."
I feel my lips separate as I remember everything that woman told Jane Christmas night. She was telling the truth, and I just hope that they find each other again and Jane forgives her. God, Jane has been lied to all her life and still hasn't even realized.
"But why couldn't Jane go with her? Why did you have to bring your eight year old child along with you?!" I ask, beginning to get more angry. If she went with her mum, then she would have everything she's been craving. A family, a healthy life, simplicity.
"Jane was essential to the deal Harry. If I didn't bring her with me into hiding, then Jerry would've killed her."
"But why?"
Right when the words leave my mouth, my eyes widen in realization and Ted just takes the answer to my own question out of my mouth.
"Aiden."
I shake my head in disapproval.
"So he pretty much isolated her to make sure that she wouldn't get distracted by any other kids, so she could give all of her attention to him." I hear myself speak, everything beginning to seem clear to me.
Ted nods and I just begin staring down at my untied white converse.
"But I still don't understand why you hate Aiden so much. I mean he didn't know about any of this as well. Right?"
All I hear is his breathing and I feel my head look up, my whole body filling with anger.
"Right?" I repeat through gritted teeth.
His foot begins to tap neurotically and fucking annoyingly.
"At first he didn't. Their friendship was innocent, but as the years passed and Aiden began going into his teen years. He fell in love with her and grew an obsession..."
I feel my eyes widen.
"An obsession?" I choke out.
"Yes. At what point he would threaten to hurt me if I even got near her. He was the only one that could read to her. He was the only one that could eat with her. He was the only one that could even say her name. It was fucking creepy."
I ball my hands into fists and I'm already ready to beat the shit out of that fucking skinny ass cunt.
"Jerry then went up to me, telling me how Aiden wanted to marry Jane and that if she declined then he would shoot me as well as her. She was only fourteen years old."
Oh fuck no.
"What happened?" I dare to even ask.
"Angie ended up finding out since Aiden confessed to her about his plans for the wedding ceremony and she threatened Jerry that she would divorce his ass and send him to jail if he went through with it. He gave in, and when Angie took Aiden with her to California to get psychiatric help, Jerry went back to dealing and leaving us poor and hungry. And there you have it. Now do you fucking understand?!"
"Why don't you call the fucking cops!?" I question.
"We have no proof! And besides, Jerry deleted both me and Jane's files, so it's as if we don't exist. He made new ones up for both me and her and the cops wouldn't believe me if I told them who I was. Just get her away from him please. I know she'll listen to you."
My fists unclench and I just nod weakly.
"I don't know if it'll work, but I'll try. But you have to make sure to tell her right away. Do you hear me?! She has to know what really happened with her mother." I say.
He slowly gets up from the table and walks up to me.
"Fine." He whispers before giving out his hand for me to shake. And I take it.
"Do you know where she is?" He asks.
I nod, remembering how Kathrine was telling me about it last night before she showed up. They're having breakfast at some french bakery a few blocks away.
He nods back.
"But first I have to get something." I state as we both release our hands.
"What?"
I just smile.
"Her Christmas present."
...
The small black suede box is in the right pocket of my jean jacket and I just hope she accepts it. It may not fit her since it was originally bought for Eli, but I can always get it resized for her. It's the promise ring I was going to give to Eli, until I realized that well...she didn't love me. But now I know that Jane loves me and after today I realized that maybe I am good for her. I thought I fucked up her life when it was really all Aiden and his corrupt father's doing. Maybe I can be her dream catcher, just maybe.
I get out of my car and I just begin sprinting towards the small cafe that has a huge cartoon mug with smoke coming from the top plastered on top of the door.
It smells delicious when I go inside, the scent of croissants and coffee filling me up and causing my stomach to grumble which I quickly ignore. Remember what you came here for Harry.
There's an arched entrance that leads to the seating areas and I hide in front of one of the bright orange walls to make sure that no one sees me just yet. I peek out a little and right in one of the front two tables is the turd fuck and her. She's wearing a nice black leather jacket with floral leggings, with her hair down in waves, the way I like it. And Aiden, well who the fuck cares what he's wearing because he's always going to look like an asshole either way.
She's just taking a bite of a doughnut, dipping it in a glass of chocolate milk and I can't help but chuckle a little at the strange combination.
I grab the black box out from my pocket and I quickly stop myself from walking any further when I notice Aiden grabbing one of her hands.
No. Let go.
When I place my left foot forward, my face reddening from anger, I place it back when I begin seeing his eyes roam around the room. Fuck. I can't let him see me.
His face is now more serious as she just uses her free hand to continue eating, not looking affected at all by the way his thumb is rubbing circles around her hand. Fucking sicko.
"I need to confess something to you." He begins.
She swallows some of her milk before nodding a little.
"Is this the surprise you were telling me about?" She asks with one raised eyebrow.
His eyes just stare down at the table dramatically before looking back at her.
"When you fainted a few weeks ago, your dad told me to stay away from you."
Her calm demeanor automatically changes as her eyebrows begin scrunching up together, reflecting her anger.
"He what?"
Aiden just nods.
"He has a reason JJ. Don't be mad at him. I've been meaning to tell you this about me, about you and I just hope you forgive me."
What's going on?
I lean my body closer to the wall and I just ignore all the glares from the employees.
"Go on." Jane says, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze. That hurt.
He takes a deep breath before finally opening his mouth, causing my mouth to drop.
He's telling her. He's telling her everything her father just told me. He- what?
After about fifteen minutes of hearing him explain about his father's drug abuse, his father's plan to hide them, his own obsession with her, and even about his days in the psychiatric health center, I realize how he has not even mentioned anything about her own father's drug problems. He actually lied about that part, saying that Jerry just framed Ted for the whole thing and I just can't believe my ears.
Aiden has...he's changed and I think that he truly does love her. And that's the thing that kills me the most.
When he finally finishes, Jane just has a blank expression on her face, her hand still in his, but her face completely emotionless. She looks almost robotic.
"Jane. I love you. And this isn't like before when I had issues, this time it's real. I don't want to keep you to myself because I know you have a life outside of me and the world deserves to see how bright you are. And what the surprise is that I just want to know if- if you would be my girlfriend?"
I feel my breath catch in my throat and I slowly place the box back in my pocket before leaving the store without another word.
...
After a few hours of contemplating what to do with myself, I decided to just leave my house and go back to Ted. I think he has the right to know how Aiden is. How he's changed and how I witnessed it personally.
Even though that man angers me and has angered me MANY times, I'm going to miss him a little while I'm gone on tour. He I guess has kind of been a little like a father figure to me, and I guess this is also my goodbye to him.
When I go to his door, I notice how it's already slightly opened. He probably went grocery shopping and forget to close his own door. God, if this place ever gets robbed, it's on his ass.
I push open the door and feel my mouth drop to the ground when I stand still in horror at the blood stained floor.
Loud crying begins to echo through my ears, and I slowly begin tip towing myself towards the noise, following the trail of blood.
"You could've stopped this from happening. This is all your fault!" I hear a recognizable voice say.
And when I finally realize that the sound is coming from Ted's room, I quietly walk right beside the door, concealing my self behind the wall next to it, and peeking my head out to see Aiden pointing a gun at Jane's father.

Notes