Loose Change (Harry Styles) [BOOK 2]

Harry's POV
I don't know whether to be pissed off or thrown off, so as I lock myself in Aiden's bathroom, I decide to just be off, because I don't really know what to feel at this moment other than that. I'm just completely fucking off.
"Harry. Please say something." I hear my mother beg through the line.
I rub my face with my free hand out of frustration. I would usually lick my lips when I'm this out of it, but Jane always says that I do that, and right now I don't want to think about her. She pretty much committed treason by putting me on the spot like that, but then again I'll probably get over it since I can't bring myself to think negatively about the red head who thinks she's a strawberry blonde when she's really a fucking red head. God damn her.
"I'm here." I spit out, feeling my grip around my phone tighten. I'm not mad at her. Actually, scratch that, I'm furious with her. I worked hard to get her to ignore me, and now she's rebelling and calling me on Christmas, crying and getting me choked up as well. You're a man damn it. Men don't act like this. But then again, men don't also scream at their sister when they're drunk, take advantage of women, and just do all the shit I've done, so really I'm not a man. But a thing. And since I'm unsure whether or not things cry, if I do end up shedding a tear, at least I'll have an excuse.
"I've missed your voice." She whispers.
I feel my mouth drop a little and I quickly sniffle, no I can't allow her to forgive me that easily. I won't have it.
"I-I"
My plan to just shut her out and hang up on her is failing as I just remain speechless on the phone, breathing while hearing her breath.
"Gemma forgives you Harry. She actually forgave you about a few hours after the incident happened. It has been almost a year... Please just communicate with us again. Come home for Christmas. Let me say happy birthday to you. Just let me back in your life."
I try to respond with an excuse, but instead I just do the opposite. Maybe if I actually visit them once, at least once I mean...that wouldn't be so bad would it? I could still make them hate me afterwards, I just kind of want to hear them breathing, but not through the phone, but face to face.
"Yeah." I simply reply.
I begin pacing back and forth through the widely large bathroom before sitting down on the toilet seat.
I hear her sigh, and I sniffle again.
"So does that mean you forgive me?" She questions.
I shut my eyes closed and I lean my body forward, resting my face in my free hand, my elbow resting on my knee.
"Why would I forgive you if you did nothing wrong in the first place. I was the one who screamed at Gemma drunk up the ass. I was the one that made you to sad. I was the one that ruined everything and that will always ruin everything an-"
"Harry. Stop. You aren't the destructor, you're the one that's destroyed."
And at that, all the barriers I built shattered. I cried, and if things don't cry, then I fail at that too.
"I'm so sorry mum, I-"
"Why would I forgive you if you did nothing wrong in the first place." She repeats my words from just a moment before, tearing me even more. Damn. Put yourself together.
I know she's lying to spare my sanity, but her words are just adding to my guilt. Fuck, I have no idea what to do.
"Come home. At least for a few days." I hear her say.
Wait did I say that out loud? God damn you Jane, again.
"I can't."
I take a deep breath as I sit myself up and I wipe the moisture off my face. I must look like a major pussy right now.
"But aren't you on vacation?"
"I can't leave her alone. She doesn't have a passport." I immediately respond.
"But you ca-"
"I'm sorry mum, but if she can't go, I can't go."
I know that she is aware of who I'm implying and by the sound of her breaths and lack of words, I know that she understands or is at least trying to. Then again, no one really does nor can understand the relationship between Jane and I, I don't even understand it.
"Well maybe I'll go to visit you. Gemma is actually in California now, studying by the way. Did you know that?"
I do. I actually from time to time would stock my sister's social media accounts to see how her life is and to make sure that she's okay since I refused to ask her about it personally. She seems happy. She lives in this simple flat with her American boyfriend, Lucas I think I recall.
She of course lives near Beverly Hills, since she's more of a socialite then a home body.
"No." I lie.
"Well maybe if you ever go touring there, you can visit her. She's missed you as well you know."
"Yeah." I respond.
I feel myself flinch as I hear something fall loudly to the floor, most likely now broken. What's going on out there.
"I-I gotta go." I say as I feel my eyes narrow and I stand up
from my position.
"Okay."
We both then exchange I love you's until I finally hang up and unlock the bathroom door, stepping out of the room.
Many people would think I would feel this sort of completion after hearing my mother forgiving me, but I actually don't feel that. I don't feel anything and that confuses me. I mean my chest feels a little lighter, but then again that can just be because my body got some oxygen or something.
I begin to hear screaming, Jane's screaming and I quickly begin to sprint. Fuck, what's going on.
I almost stumble over a piece of cornbread that is on the floor, increasing my hatred towards bread as well as corn and I instantly stop behind Jane who is yelling violently at a middle aged looking blonde woman.
I place my phone in my pocket and I put my hand on Jane's shoulder.
"What's going on here?" I ask seriously.
Jane's POV
I don't even turn around as I hear Harry approach this scene from behind me, I just continue staring at the whore known as my mother in front of me, who looks quite pained by my remarks.
"This is my mother Harry. The despicable slut that left my father and I to rot in hell." I didn't say it because I wanted to introduce him to her, but only because I want to hurt her mentally in all the ways she has to my father.
"Jane, please don't do th-" Aiden begins as he walks up to me, but I quickly step away from him from disgust.
"Don't you even dare try to touch me. How could you even invite her!" I state, as I turn my attention on Aiden who looks painfully guilty. I won't pity him, I won't even look at him, no matter how wide his eyes are.
I close my eyes for a second, my fists clenched at my sides, before turning around and looking at Harry who has a blank expression on his face. He's just staring at the evil blonde, but quickly meets my eyes when I grab his wrist.
"Come on. Let's just go..." I whisper, trying to calm myself down and just disappear from this place as quickly as possible.
Harry just nods and pulls his hand out of my hold before intertwining our fingers. I nod back before we both begin to walk to the front of the house.
"I apologize Angie. This was none of your doing." I whisper apologetically to Aiden's mother, ignoring the woman beside her before continuing my stroll to the freedom that is outside.
As Harry gets his coat, I can't help but hold his hand tighter, and I just stare at the door in front of me, feeling Harry's eyes averted in my direction.
"Jane." I hear Harry whisper.
I glance up at him and I notice that my face is wet. I'm so pathetic. I'm actually crying about this.
"The thing is that she probably didn't even come for me... She probably came because of you, to get more attention." I feel myself state, a few more tears escaping.
"That's not true Jane, I me-"
"You can call me a whore and a slut and even a prostitute, but don't you ever say that about me again."
Harry and I both turn around to see my mother stomping herself to us in her black stilettos that go along with her expensive purple knee length dress, with a matching black trench coat and black tights.
She looks like she made something of herself since every thing on her looks more expensive than my own life, and that nauseates me.
Harry releases my hand and stands in front of me in a protective way.
"Leave her alone." He spits out in a commanding and intimidating tone. God I love him.
Her make up is beginning to smudge under her eyes as she wipes her tears in a delicate way. She shakes her head slightly and walks up to him, us.
"I didn't come for him. I came here for you. I love you Jane. You're my daughter." She whispers, her voice cracking slightly.
I see how Harry tenses slightly and looks unsure with what to do, so I take action, standing in front of him and pushing him to the side.
I just laugh, because her response is tragically comical to me and I just feel my dignity diminishing as she just stares down at me and continues.
"I'm not lying to you Jane. I swear I-" She actually attempts to place her hand on my shoulder in the way mother's usually do to consult their children, but even though she gave birth to me, she is not my mother and I am not her child.
Even though he did leave, my father was my mother and my father, and I can't even comprehend how she has the audacity to come and barge in this joyful evening and label me as one of her objects.
"You've lied all of my life and if you came here for me like you say, then why did you never try looking for me before? Why now, when I'm nineteen! I lived eleven years without my mother and I would look every day out that window hoping that you would be down there wanting me!" I admit as I feel my bottom lip begin to quiver.
I can hear Harry breathing behind me and I just feel so bad that he has to be here to witness all of this. He already has enough troubles in his life and I'm just adding to the long list. But I have to tell this woman all that I've been holding in all these years or I'll just explode.
"I remember you used to tell me when the sun rises, a miracle happens. And each day, each dreadful and lonely morning, I would cross my fingers and pray that maybe that day would be my miracle. And my miracle wouldn't be wealth or fame, but you... But you didn't want me." I add, breaking into sobs.
I know Aiden and his mother are somewhere hiding, eavesdropping and I know that Harry is listening since he is right next to me, and that maybe even the whole neighborhood is hearing me right now, but maybe it's good that I'm actually being mad at someone and not forgiving them, I feel more awake into reality then yesterday and that to me is progress. I can't keep living this fantasy life in my mind, constantly thinking about the past and rainbows and butterflies, because truth be told, life sucks.
Her eyes soften to the point of cotton and she just places her hands on the sides of my face and I let her.
I have her light brown eyes, thus when I look into hers I feel as if I'm staring at my own reflection. Hers are glossy and puffy resembling mine, due to both of our crying and I don't know if I like sharing something similar with her.
"The minute I left you, I already missed you more than I've missed anything in my life. I even drove back the next day to get you and take you along with me, but you as well as your father were gone. I asked the servants where you went off to and they looked at me as if I spoke another language. They told me that they never even heard of you or your father and that they didn't even recognize me! I looked for weeks, hiring private investigators, but nothing. You and your father's files were deleted. I didn't understand and to this day I don't understand how that could be. I thought I went insane and even checked myself in a hospital, but they said I was perfectly fine. So I moved to Texas, got married, and not a day went by that I didn't think about you. You and him-"
She glances behind me at Harry before meeting my eyes
again.
"-kept on popping up all over the magazines and I thought it was just sheer coincedence that a girl with similar colored hair shared your name, but then as soon as I saw the video where he saved you when you fainted at the park, I knew. And I have been looking for you here ever since, and I bumped into Aiden, he invited me, and here I am with you. Because I want to get to know you, I want to get to know my daughter."
I begin to stare beyond her, many questions beginning to explode in my mind. First off, what video? Second, where did she bump into Aiden? Why didn't he tell me? Why were all my files deleted?
I can't tell if she's telling the truth or not, but as I look into her eyes, curiosity just ignites my whole body.
I slowly pull her hands down from my face and my attention soon
averts back to her. My tears are beginning to dry, and I can't stop sniffling since right now I'm in a need of a tissue, but I ignore it.
"Why did you leave in the first place? And why did you take all of the money? I mean you didn't even leave my father a cent."
My anger is beginning to return and I step back away from her until I feel my back hit Harry's chest.
"You're a fraud and for a second you even got me fooled, but no. I know not to trust you again. But it was a good story though, I have to admit. Maybe you should even tell screenwriter, might take it."
"Jane-" She begins, but this time Harry actually speaks.
"No. I can't even listen to any more of this!" Harry states as I feel him wrap his arm around me.
"Jane just let me explain. Your father is keeping so much things from you! Please let me explain!" She begs, trying to get near me again, but Harry just puts me in front of him and leads me out of this wretched house for good.
Harry's POV
Jane's mom doesn't run after us, and I'm really glad she didn't. Jane has had a rough night, and by the way she's just staring at nothing as we walk to the taxi I called for, I know that she's remembering her childhood, most likely times she spent with that bitch.
A cold breeze hits us, and I quickly place my jean jacket over her shoulder.
"Thanks." She whispers.
I just nod and walk not so close yet not so far next to her. I feel likes she needs some space, if I were in her situation, I know I would.
We just wait in front of the neighborhood sign that says Hade houses, awaiting for the late taxi to arrive. I actually wanted to take my car, but Jane made a point. Papparrazi would recognize it and most likely would have followed us and ruin the night. Well ruin it more.
It's about one in the morning and I'm still not even the slight bit tired.
"You want to go somewhere?" Jane questions.
I glance to the side to see how she's just standing still, staring at the blades of grass beneath us in thought.
"Sure."
I would literally go anywhere with her, she doesn't have to ask me twice.
This time she looks at me and she gives me a tired smile. She looks really exhausted, and I would be too if I cried out all the liquid from my body.
"I wish we could go to Neverland right now. You know? Just you and me. We could have adventures and just be without any trouble." She whispers, forcing a chuckle.
I step closer to her.
"Sadly Jane, Neverland doesn't exist." I say.
Her smile fades and she just stares back at the grass again, her eyebrows furrowed.
"I know. It was just a thought." She whispers.
I walk even closer to her, my face only inches away from hers and I point her chin up slightly.
"But California does." I state.
Her lips separate a little and she's about to say something until the taxi finally arrives.
I release her chin and we both just enter the car, her shutting the door after.
"Where to?" The taxi driver questions in an uninterested tone.
The car smells like cigarettes, causing me to cough, but I have to get over it.
"The airport." I respond as I buckle in my seatbelt. I look over to the right to see Jane's confused expression.
"Harry." she comments after buckling her seatbelt.
The man begins to drive out of the area, and I feel Jane place her hand over mine. I look over at her to see her eyebrows scrunched up together in an adorable way.
"You were serious?" she asks.
I nod before leaning my mouth to her ear.
"We're gonna go to Neverland Jane. Away from all of this." I whisper.
When I pull away, I see how her face is calm and she smiles a genuine smile before scooting herself closer to me and nuzzling her head on my shoulder.
"God I love you." she mutters as she yawns.
I open my arms and I move her to my chest, holding her tight and inhaling her natural strawberry resembling scent. Sometimes I'm not even sure if everything that is happening is actually happening, that I'm actually just passed out drunk in some bar. But as I look down at her in my arms, whether she's real or not, all I know is that she is the world's only hallucination that I never want to wake up from.
After a few minutes, I begin to hear her small, barely noticeable snores and I know that she has fallen asleep.
"I love you." I whisper, knowing that she can't possibly hear me.

Notes