*Reagan’s POV*
I felt rejuvenated after my conversation with Harry and around eight more hours of sleep. When my eyes finally began to focus and adjust to the sunlight that peeked through my curtains, I picked up my phone hoping to see any kind of social interest come my way. A smile covered my lips as soon as I picked up the small device seeing H’s name on the screen complete with a message.

From:Harry Pleassssse?!
I got an iPhone 5 :D, but I kind of miss my 4 :(. This one is odd, and long, and too small for my hands. But I guess it’ll have to do.

To:Harry Pleassssse?!
Haha the 4 was too small for your hands! They’re freakishly large H! Can you try not to break this one please? I’d like to be able to communicate with you over these next 13 days. Well almost 12 days now for you.

I stretched before I rose from my memory foam mattress, not really wanting to move, but knowing that I wouldn’t be able to sleep anymore. It’s already twelve in the afternoon and I feel sluggish because of it. Sleeping well past noon on a Saturday would be totally normal if I were at school and partying like I used to, but seeing as how I haven’t done much of anything these past couple of days besides sleep, watch movies, and annotate the random psychology articles that Dr. Koch sent my way, my body was aching for me to get up and move around.

As I got my clothes ready for today, my phone vibrated again. When I read the message a deep blush spread from my cheeks and down my neck

From:Harry Pleassssse?!
You’re awake now? How’d you rest? You’re the only contact I have in my phone right now. You should feel honored. And Heeyy :( I thought you liked my hands...as a matter of fact I remember you telling me why you liked them...It was something about my fingers if I can recall correctly ;).

To:Harry Pleassssse?!
I slept well and I’m beyond honored :p. I think I was supposed to ask you that question though. Please tell me you went to sleep? And yes H., I love all of you, but your hands are an added bonus.

From:Harry Pleassssse?!
;D I slept fine on the couch at Zayn and Louis’. Went there after I got my phone. When I went to give Laurie her phone back, I heard her and Niall having sex. It sounded like mating season in the wild :/ Left it on the table and bailed! Quite traumatic, but I’m sure you make more noise. I love it when I make you scream. I miss you I love you I need you...BADLY.

I blushed once more and laughed to myself as I exited my room with noticeably more pep in my step while I typed out a reply to Harry. He always finds a way to make me laugh or smile whether it be through text message or in person, and right now I really needed it. The day is going admittedly much better than it started off, but my vicious subconscious continues to remind me of the dream I had of Peyton hours ago. Knowing that Harry’s court date is tomorrow, I don’t think it’ll let up, not until I know the verdict. My focused side and my subconscious will continue to work against me. Sometimes If I could separate myself from my own treacherous thoughts I would.

As I continue to type out words to Harry on my way down the hall to the bathroom, I’m startled and interrupted when I bump into my mother. She raises an eyebrow at me and primps her lips before she speaks.

“You’re finally up.”

I nod my head and run my hand through my hair before I lean against the door jam and try to find the words to say to her about what she woke up to earlier this morning. It’s harder than I thought it would be as I look into her eyes.

“This morning mom, I ...the dream was–” She puts up her hand to stop me, shaking her head while doing so.

“I used to have bad dreams too, there’s no need to explain.” I could tell that she wasn’t done with her sentence and the the brief silence that hung in the air was nerve wrecking.

“When I was pregnant with you my nightmares were vivid and horrible.”

And there it is.

“Mom please will you stop with this?! That was just a bad dream. You’re making it more than what it is.” I walked past her and into the bathroom starting up my shower water before I stood with my arms crossed cornered with no other choice but to listen to her.

“Reagan, you’re the one who said that your hormones were everywhere yesterday! And what do you expect me to think? It’s twelve o’clock in the afternoon! All I’ve seen you do while you’re here is sleep, and don’t try to tell me that it’s still jet lag. I heard you crying in your room the other day. This ‘trip home’ was so sudden. You couldn’t have thought that it would be a surprise for me and your father? When you come home, we want to know in advance so that we can take the proper time off work and not have to rush and do it. I missed you and its nice to see you and have you home, but this is suspicious Reagan.”

“Well, I’m sorry for coming home unexpectedly and trying to catch up on sleep that I missed while I was working fourteen hour days damn near every day in London, but I don’t know what else you want me to say. I’m not pregnant and the fact that you keep accusing me of being so is more than offensive!”

‘You sure?’ My focused side and subconscious join forces against me again and I can almost see them now, personified into human form, waving a pregnancy test in front of my face and glancing over glasses at me while smirking. I’m late and I know that I am, but I’ve convinced myself that its the stress of everything going on around me. I’ve had the odd stomach cramp so I know it will be here soon. It has to be.

My mom took a deep breath hands in defeat before using them to pinch her eyes closed. My phone all the while rung furiously in my hand as I waited for the conversation to end.

“I’m not trying to offend you Reagan. I’m just worried.”

My mom’s eyes showed her statement to be true and I placed my phone on the countertop before crossed over to her to giver her a hug.

“You’re worried for no reason.”

She hugs me back, but as I rest my chin on her shoulder, a new nagging thought grows. The hug ends and I force a smile before I cross back over to the counter to grab my phone, then to the running shower to check the temperature of the water.

“I thought you had to work today?” I ask her after seeing I’ve missed a call from Channel.

“I called off this morning. I wanted to make sure that you were going to be alright today. You scared me and your father half to death this morning.”

“I’m sorry. Was dad mad at me?” I ask thinking about his reaction this morning.

“Its alright. As long as I know you’re...okay. Your father isn’t mad, he’s just concerned like I am. I’ll let you shower now. Do you want to go get lunch when you’re done seeing as how its past noon? Or do you have plans?”

“That was Channel that just called. I think she wants me to come over to our old place and hang out. I’ll probably grab something to eat with her if thats okay? If you want I don’t have to go. I can–”

“No its fine. At least you’d be doing something I’m used to seeing if you go out with Channel. Have fun.”

My mother leaves the bathroom and as soon as she closes the door I subconsciously place my hand over my stomach.

---

*Harry’s POV*
I know I probably shouldn’t have because I have court tomorrow, but I smoked with Zayn and Louis before we started our shift, more like they smoked in the car with the windows up and I inhaled. The second hand high didn’t give me the buzz I’m used to having, but it worked none the less. The light-headed feeling left a smile on my face and seeing as how I haven’t been back home to take my meds, I think that this is a pretty good substitute.

I push the idea of home and my mum and Robin out of my head before it sits there too long and ruins the mellow feeling that’s taken hold of my senses. Even if it’s a false sense of calm, I’d rather have it right now over the possibilities of what could unfold tomorrow.

Zayn walks by and waves his hand in front of my face bringing me out of my blank stare.

“Are you stoned or what?” He laughs before he continues and I grin and shake my head, “Look I know its been a while for you since you last smoked but we gotta work, yeah?”

Zayn pushes me in the direction of a guy and a girl at the bar. As I fix their drink orders, Zayn takes advantage of my numbed state.

“Hey?” His eyes snap over to mine.

“What was that I saw in the break room last night?”

“It was nothing. Tamsin’s bullshit.” An uncontrollable grin comes to my lips contradicting my feelings on the subject.

I hand the couple their drinks and take the cash thats given to me, almost forgetting that I have to give them back change. The guy raises his eyebrow at me and I swear that I can hear him tell his girlfriend that I’m high.

“Yeah, but mate, you were touching her kind of intimately. Didn’t the two of you used to fuck?” HIs word choice momentarily sobers me.

“Key words: USED TO. She was crying. I wiped a tear.” I lie more to myself than to him, “It was nothing. Drop it.”

Zayn makes a clicking sound with his tongue before he rubs his hand through his beard, chuckling to himself.

“Don’t fuck up mate.”

My eyebrows furrow, but this time when I glance back over to him, a serious look is on his face.

---

The bar dies down a few hours later and my high begins to subside allowing the paranoid feeling I have for tomorrow to finally take hold. As I go from table to table to wipe down the empty spaces, an arrogant voice that I recognize comes up from behind and orders gin on the rocks.

When I turn around, my eyes are met with that of a cold stoney blue as Dr. Koch shakes off his jacket and rests it on the back of his seat.

“Get one for yourself as well. We have some things to talk about Styles.” Dr. Koch takes out a manila folder from the briefcase that he carried and rests it on the table.

The folder is eerily similar to the one that Dr. Baker has at Maudsley. The one that holds my re-admittance papers and the photos.

I go to the bar to get his drink and tell Louis that I’m going on my second break for the night before I sit down at the table.

“You reek of marijuana, Harold. You should know better than that.” Dr. Kock drinks a fourth of the glass of gin without even flinching and it makes me want to be sick.

“You have court in less than 24 hours. You’d think that you would withdraw yourself from illegal activity, but then again when the mind isn’t wired right it acts more on instinct.”

“What do you want?” I ask him as he takes another swig of his drink.

“Do you know what this is, Harold?” His finger taps the manila folder and I don’t respond, “Go ahead and open it.”

As I lift the folder and open the flap, my fingers come in contact with glossy photo papers. All of the pictures are of me. The ones Dr. Baker showed me at her office are there along with a few new ones that I haven’t seen, including ones from a few hours ago tonight of me in the car with Louis and Zayn. Louis was going to pass me the bowl, but I declined. The picture makes it look as if I took it however. I can feel the blood drain from my face as I look back at Dr. Koch and drop the folder on the table.

“What are you going to do with these?”

“Show them to the judge tomorrow. I hope Peyton goes to jail and rots there, but you need help. More help that I’m sure two years at Maudsley barely scratched the surface on.”

I run my hands through my hair as my blood begins to boil. Tears of anger prick the back of my eyes and I can tell that they’re glossy and red.

“You can’t do this! This isn’t fair!”

“Fair? Harry, this is a relapse! You had the same behavior patterns before you killed your step-father. Not sleeping, drugs, uncontrollable anger bouts. You don’t even remember what happened behind this bar that night do you? Because I saw it all. You could have hurt yourself.” He finishes off his gin before lighting a cigarette and continues.

“You broke Peyton’s jaw in four places. Do you remember doing that? Its wired shut.”

“He raped her! He deserves it! He’s lucky that I didn’t–” I cut myself off as I realize what I was going say and have said many times before.

“He’s lucky that you didn't what? Didn’t kill him? I know that’s an expression for some, but when it comes from a person who has killed before, it becomes a threat.”

“I stopped myself!”

“But you thought about it didn't you? You thought about draining the life out of him the same way you did your step-father. Do you think that's normal, Harold? Do you think its signs of a healthy mind?”

I open my mouth and then close it again and an arrogant smirk comes to Dr. Koch’s lips.

“You followed Peyton to his room and beat him when you should have left the matter to the law, regardless to how angry you were. But you can’t control it.”

“Have you ever loved someone, anyone, and had to see them be hurt?" My eyes filled with tears again as the thought of how broken and distraught Reagan looked after she read those text messages, but I fight back the urge to let them fall before I continued. "You talk to people about their internal struggles for a living and are licensed to help them get better, but you don't see the person falling apart in front of you, you see a paycheck! Have you ever taken the time to look at your patients and see them physically and mentally fade the way that she did?! Have you ever loved someone to the point where you would do anything humanly possible to keep them feeling safe? Of course not you’ve never loved anyone and no one has ever loved you enough to depend on you to do so!”

Dr. Koch grinned while shaking his head, brushing off my comment as if I never said it.

“Your excuse is understandable but not valid.”

“Why are you doing this?” I asked while tugging on the ends of my hair.

“Your mother is getting remarried Harold. Is that true? Your relapse could end up full circle. No one wants that to happen.” Dr. Koch and I make eye contact before I sit back in my seat and rub my hand over my face. I chuckle humorlessly to myself in my frustration catching him off guard.

I didn't want to do this.

“Who's going to believe an alcoholic?”

I raise my eyebrows and wait for an answer while pinching my bottom lip. Dr. Koch puts out his half smoked cigarette and I can see the confidence he had slowly begin to fade along with a look of badly hidden shock before I continue.

“When you first came in here, you looked familiar, but I couldn’t put my finger on who you were or where I knew you from. Reagan kept saying your name to me and I still couldn’t put it to you, but I remembered as soon as you came to bail me out. I remembered you from two and a half years ago and then I remembered you from coming in here. You would come in here watching me buying shots of gin and would barely be able to make it out of here standing. Being the arrogant bastard that you are, you would always leave with the smallest bit of dignity right before me and the boys ever got the chance to cut you off and throw you out.” I tapped the now empty glass of gin as I looked at him with an unwavering glare.

“You’re a functioning alcoholic, but an alcoholic none the less. You would lose your license. Wouldn't you? Your entire livelihood and all of your awards that you have that Reagan has told me about would go to shit. You wouldn’t be able to deny it either,” I pointed to the little device on the ceiling before I continued, “we have camera’s. The camera’s are dated. And I’m sure the day that you didn’t show for work, would line up with the footage of the previous night when you came in here and got so plastered that not even you could make yourself get up the next day. I remember that because I was pissed that Reagan was in a room alone with Peyton and she told me about how you must have over worked yourself.”

Dr. Koch’s eyes were frosted over as he stared at me and I could tell that we were now on even ground.

“So if you didn’t get it, let me make myself clear. If you bring those pictures in tomorrow, I will end you and that isn’t a 'threat' Dr. Koch. It's a promise.”

Notes

Hello beautiful New and Faithful subscribers! Happy Easter (if you recognize it) How are you all today? THANK YOU FOR THE VOTES AND SUBS!!!! They don't go unnoticed so please keep them coming! ;* What did you all think of this chapter? This is one of the longest chapters in ITP history so far and it all came to me at three o'clock this morning (Chicago time)! So I hope to get bombarded with comments because I live off of them! Fear the wrath of Harry when he doesn't take his meds! and poor Reagan can't catch a break at home, but do you think her mom is right? COMMENT COMMENT COMMENT, VOTE AND SUB! and as you all should know by now, I LOVE YOU ALL FOR READING!~Xx

Ps: here's a up close and personal view of Reagan and Harry's Text messages~ Xx