LOUIS’ POV

Harry leaves our bedroom many times and comes back to try to coax me out to socialize.

“Lou,” he says, “Niall just got here.”

“I’ll see him later,” I groan, lighting up another cigarette, no longer caring that the smoke is wafting indoors.

He comes back a half hour later with a beer, “Baby, I’ve got you a pint, and also Zayn and Perrie just arrived.”

I consider following him for a second, but decide to just take the beer and remain in my spot in the doorway.

Harry leaves, and when the door opens again, I beat him to the punch, “I’m sorry, sweetheart. I’m not ready to go down yet.”

“Not Harry,” the familiar chuckle rings in my ears.

“Mummy,” I grin to myself, standing from my spot on the ground, “I was wondering when you lot would show up.”

She coos and pulls me into a tight hug, her face buried between my neck and my shoulder, “What’s got my boy down?”

I sigh, appreciating her familiar scent, “Loads.”

“Sit with me, love,” she sighs, “And then you’re showering, because you reek of cigarette smoke. Speaking of which, I’ll lecture you on that later.”

I simply chuckle under my breath. Mum means well, but she’s never been very intimidating. We both sit on the bench at the end of mine and Harry’s bed.

“So,” she rests her hand on my knee comfortingly, “What’s on your mind?”

I remember how much she doesn’t know and feel tears well in my eyes at the thought of saying it all aloud.

When I start to sob, Mum pulls me into another hug, sniffling herself.

“It’s Harry,” I choke out as she holds me closer.

“What happened, baby?” She whispers, “Did you two get in a fight?”

I breathe out and chuckle dryly, “Something like that. Basically I’m brooding.”

She laughs at that, but just rocks me back and forth while stroking my hair.

“Mum,” I whisper, finding it impossible to speak up, “Harry’s sick.”

I can hear her breath catch and she freezes for a moment, “Oh, my dear.”

“It’s bad, Mum,” I try so hard not to cry, “And I’m trying to be strong for him, but I- I suck at taking care of him. He deserves better than me... Especially now.”

“Lou-“ she begins, but I just shake my head.

“No, it’s all true. There’s no use denying it,” I sigh, “Even Anne agrees.”

“Well,” Mum begins to stand, huffing in irritation, “If she has something to say about my baby boy, then-“

“Mum,” I scoff, “Stop it, okay? I’m a grown man. You’d be proving her one hundred percent correct by fighting my battles for me.”

“There shouldn’t be any battle,” she retorts, sitting at my side once again.

“I agree,” I shrug, “But there isn’t much I can do about it when I can’t prove her wrong.”

“You already have, dear,” My mum ruffles my hair slightly, “Sure, Harry cooks and cleans a lot, but I’ll bet Anne doesn’t know about Harry’s little break down earlier this year, yeah? He wouldn’t be clean right now-“

“Stop,” I close my eyes and breathe deeply, “There’s no use in pointing fingers. What it boils down to is that Harry is fighting for his life right now, and it’s going to take a bit of selflessness on my part for him to get better. I can’t help him like I want to.”

“That’s not true,” she grins after a few beats of silence, “You are the most motivated and selfless person I know, and with your mind set to this, you can’t fail. It’s not possible, love.”

I bite at my bottom lip nervously, not sure of what to say.

“Just shower and come downstairs,” she pleads softly, “I’m guessing that there will be some important discussion this evening and decisions will be made after that. Are you even considering what Harry wants?”

“It’s not about what he wants,” I bury my face in my hands, emotionally drained and wishing this day would be over already, “It’s about what he needs.”

_________

HARRY’S POV

Louis comes downstairs about fifteen minutes after Jay does. His hair is damp and he has a fake grin on his face as he greets the rest of his family. I take a long swig of my wine, draining the rest of the glass as I watch him nervously.

Perry, Zayn, and Niall enter the room seconds later, Niall’s voice carrying through the kitchen, “Hey! There he is. We’ve been waiting around for you, you prick.”

Louis chuckles and meets our mate halfway, accepting his warm hug. He hugs Perrie next, and lastly Zayn, who whispers something to him quickly. Louis smirks and pats his back. I glance at Perrie suspiciously and she simply rolls her eyes carelessly.

“I think we can sit for dinner now,” my mum says as she approaches the group from behind.

“Sounds great,” I smile at her, “Thanks for cooking.”

She just grins softly, having not acted the same ever since our argument.

Once we’re all seated at the table, I reach my hand under the table in hopes of gathering Louis’ hand in mine. Only, he pulls it away, turning to smile at me sadly. I respect his space and anxiously wipe my palms on my clothed thighs instead.

“Before we get started,” I clear my throat as my voice cracks. “I- uh, have an announcement of sorts. I have something I have to tell you.”

Suddenly, Louis’ chilled hand is on top of my significantly warmer hand, obviously after his realization of my intentions. I feel a spark run through my veins, a spark of encouragement and comfort.

“You can do it,” he whispers to me, though I’m sure everyone can hear him clearly. The dining room is deadly quiet, despite the unusual amount of children present as is unavoidable with Louis’ family.

“I- well,” I try to go on, but my mouth is dry. I turn to Louis and he squeezes my hand as he nods slowly.

“What Harry is trying to say,” he presses his lips together in thought before continuing, “Is that he’s sick.”

Louis’ voice cracks much like my own had. I study him closely, unable to face our family and friends after their subsequent gasps. His adam’s apple bobs as he swallows, nibbling at his bottom lip nervously, probably thinking about lighting a cigarette.

“He’s got a brain tumor, and even though it’s benign,” Louis breathes slowly, lacing our fingers together, “He will have to go through regular treatments, and fairly soon have to have the tumor removed.”

I lean forward slowly, sinking my forehead onto his shoulder in shame. Not shame from my sickness, but shame from what it will mean for everyone present. I chance a look at my mum, and she’s crying once again, despite previously receiving the news.

“Harry,” Niall rests a gentle hand on my arm, urging me to look at him. I do, and I immediately regret it.

Niall’s usually bright eyes are glistening, the glare from out chandelier reflecting in his welling tears, “How long have you known?”

“I’ve known that there was an issue for about two weeks now,” I admit, watching Niall’s expression contort uncomfortably, “Louis and I saw my doctor together about a week ago and then they did a biopsy the next day.”

“Why didn’t you tell us sooner?” Liam pipes in, much more concerned than offended.

“I don’t know-“ I begin, feeling tears form in my own eyes before Louis swoops in to save the day.

“He didn’t feel comfortable. He didn’t tell me straight away either, so don’t get all upset about it, Liam. What’s important now is that he gets proper care.”

Louis glances at my mum, and her eyes dart to mine, questioning what I might have told him. I shake my head slowly, and just shrug. I’m still not over her accusations and suggestions. It’ll take time to forget about that. She’s making Louis doubt himself, and that’s the last thing anyone needs right now.

“What does that entail, exactly?” Jay questions, gripping her glass of water tightly.

Louis once again speaks for me, and I’ve never been more relieved by his need to talk.

“Well,” Louis looks briefly at each of the lads, “We all need to make a decision. Either Harry tours as long as he can while receiving treatment and dealing with significant pain and uncomfortable nausea.” Louis pauses, eyeing them again for emphasis, “Or we can postpone the tour and he can receive the surgery he needs to have anyway.”

“Louis’ making it all sound quite simple,” I butt in, chuckling softly, “The pain isn’t so bad. I’ve been experiencing it off and on for months and previously brushed it off as headaches. I can deal with it and just do the surgery after tour.”

Zayn shakes his head, his expression riddled with disbelief, “You’ve got to be kidding, H. We’re finally starting to gain control over our own careers and lives. We have a chance to do what we need. Remember when Niall’s knee started to get really bad? We all had agreed to postpone the shows, but weren’t given the option. We have weight now. We’ve got something to stick to Jason. We’re all on the same page, right? We have to postpone the tour.”

Louis nods alone with Niall while Liam stays perfectly still.

“Liam?” Zayn asks expectantly.

“I don’t know,” Liam breathes, and I feel a small sigh of relief that someone is being reasonable and still thinking about our careers. “What if they see it the other way? What if they see it as just another setback to use against us? To use against Louis and Harry?”

Louis slams his fist on the table, shocking everyone seated around, the twins shrieking dramatically. “Liam, be rational here. Harry’s health and safety is more important than anything, okay? None of that shit will matter if Harry can’t function or worse...”

He trails off, but everyone gets the point.

Liam shrugs, tossing his napkin onto the table as he stands, “You’re right, Louis. We have to postpone the tour. We can’t do it without Harry-“

“Of course we can’t,” Louis sneers, “That was never an option.”

“Let me finish for once,” Liam rolls his eyes, resting his hands on the back of his chair, “We can’t do any of this without Harry, so him being healthy is more important than our money and the fans.”

Louis clenches his fist, releasing my hand so he can gesture more vividly, “It’s not even about that! You’re making it sound like we’re giving up our lives, when in reality that’s exactly what Harry could be doing by touring in this state. Be reasonable!”

“I am!” Liam snaps back, pushing his chair in with a loud screech, “I’m thinking of everyone here, Louis. I know you care about Harry above all else, and we all love him, but-“

“No buts!” Louis tosses his hands in the air, baffled, “If you love Harry, then this isn’t even a question.”

Liam breathes deeply and turns to leave the room, Sophia sending an apologetic look our way before standing to follow him.

Louis massages his temples with two fingertips, “Any other fucking objections?”

“Louis,” Jay hisses, “Your sisters are here.”

“Sorry,” Louis groans disdainfully. “Let’s eat, shall we?”

My mum reaches for a dish in the middle of the table and passes it to Robin.

“Liam will agree when he thinks about it,” Niall assures me quietly, his arm slung around my shoulders. “We’re going to get you better, yeah?”

I nod slowly, still shell-shocked by the past five minutes, “I guess so.”

I look up at the rest of the table, immediately regretful from their longing, sad gazes. Except for Gemma. She has her face in her hands, her shoulders shaking with silent sobs.

“Gems,” I begin, but she simply shakes her head violently, standing from the table as well and exiting the room. My mum starts to stand, but I beat her to it.

“I”ll talk to her,” I sigh, kissing the top of Louis head before following after my inconsolable sister.

This day has been an utter disaster.

_______

Notes

PLEASE COMMENT xx I'll update quicker if you guys comment. It motivates me.

Also just attended my first Creative writing class. omg so excited

also im late for work oops