When our war is over

“Oh no, you already had four of them”, I remembered her and she gave me a mean glance.

The next movement she did was nearly as old as we were and I knew it too well. She threw her blonde curls over her shoulder and straightened her back to look more convincingly.

“This is our free evening and you promised to have fun! Some shoots won´t kill me, you know?”, she snapped and her voice added to the other buzzing noises in the hot and smoky air around us.

Our expectations of having fun were as different as they could be. While for her it meant parties, alcohol and some great boy stories for me it were a long run down at the beach after the sun had just rose or some cookies which were still warm from the oven while I ate them with the TV on next to me.

My favourites were the white chocolate ones with cranberries which were way to sticky and sweet to eat more than three of them before you felt like you had to puke.

But she was right since indeed I had promised to have some fun tonight earlier this evening as she had picked me up.

“We´ll write a test tomorrow”, I tried to remember her, but she only made a gesture to order me to shut up.

“Can´t you just stop thinking about school for once? It´s like everything in your life is about nothing else”, she said and we both knew she was damn right about that.

But in contrast to her I did not took all we had for granted. This world was cruel and you could only survive in it when you had a good education.

Coming from a military family was an advantage the least of us had. Lots of people were starving to death out there or froze in the first cold days of the year, while Jessica wanted to party for a little longer.

But the poverty stood face to face to wealth. That was the reason why the club was as crowded as no other place I had visited in my 17 years on this planet.

It was the forbidden which excited people and since clubs like these were officially banned by the government the business in the underground boomed.

The official reason was a laugh.

“In the face of existing financial problems of the united kingdom guiding and visiting pubs, clubs and other premises shall be prohibited with alcohol enjoyment .”

As if the rich people cared for the financial problems of the UK at all. As long as they were fine and there was still money and enough resources for us left all they did matter about where themselves.

Since I was little my parents tried to show me that some things here were going completely wrong and the older I got the more I knew they were right.

This world was a mess and whatever all those people in the magazines, newpapers and on TV tried to convince us that we just have to deal with problems which every generation before us already had, I know they are wrong.

We were at a point were somehow everything we knew seemed to break away and I felt the earth under my feet crumble harder day by day.

Sometimes I could not sleep because I could not overhear the news my parents followed every day. My Dad was a commander in the army and my Mum worked as a geoscientist and that is actually how they met 18 years ago.

“Are you listening to me?”, Jessica snapped me out of my thoughts.

“No I weren´t sorry”, I apologized and she rolled her eyes.

“You should drink something too”, she ordered and pushed one of the shoots over to me.

The glass left a wet line on the counter and I stared down at the alcohol with a disgusted face.

“I´ll write this test tomorrow without a hangover”, I only replied and took another swallow from my glass water.

“Even if we´re already best friends for all of our lives I swear if you continue to be such a slowcoach I won´t go out with you ever again”, she tried to threaten me, but I only laughed at her.

“And who will make sure you´ll get home without your father noticing?”, I countered and she gave me another dirty look since we both knew he would totally freak out to see her drunk and coming home after her curfew.

Actually he thought that she laid in her bed, sleeping like the brave kid he wanted her to be and she had to sneak out through her window.

“But Niall´ll bring another guy tonight, he promised and you have to take care of him to give us some private time and you´re always so lame when you didn´t had a drink before”, she yammered and I sighed.

Niall was her newest “adventure” as she called it. His parents came from Ireland and he was lucky to have been able to enter our borders before the got closed to any new citizen two years ago.

Even though the politicians had been really badly fighting about this decision since then nothing had changed until now. The borders were closed and no could really get in or out.

“I´m not lame”, I protested and the same second the words had left my lips I realized how lame even just this answer had sounded and that she was right.

She seemed to realize the same thing cause all she did was furrowed her eyebrows at me.

“Would you just do me this favour, please?”, she asked and nervously bobbed on her high chair.

“So what you can shove your tongue down his throat?”, I asked and she only smirked as an answer.

“If your parents knew what I´m doing for you, they would definitely end their friendship with mine”, I sighed deeply.

“Nonsense! You just don´t end a friendship which lasted for nearly two decades”, she waved my argument away.

“But speaking of ending a friendship: could you really not find anything else more basic than what you´re wearing?”, she asked while she scanned my outfit.

A pair of skinny black jeans and a white blouse, paired with my black Converse which had definitely seen their best days already. My long brown hair was in a high ponytail and the only jewellery I wore was my golden watch I had inherited from my grandmother and some pair of pearl earrings.

“What´s wrong with it?”, I asked and remembered the words my father had said as I left earlier.

“Did I ever told you about my beautiful daughter?”, he had asked and made me blush and giggle.

He was such a dork, but I knew why my Mum had fallen in love with him. He was our favourite dork of all time and behind all his muscles and strict faces I knew from when he came home from work he was the kindest person I could think of.

“You look just like you always do, honey. How are guys supposed to notice you when you look like a grey mouse?”, she sighed like I had just committed a huge crime.

A fashion crime which probably meant more to Jessica than a real one.

“But I don´t want to look like somebody else. What if the other person wants me to look always dressed up when I´m just not?”, I questioned her.

“And what if it´s just for the night?”, she winked at me.

“You now that´s nothing I neither want or need”, I said a little disgusted as I took a look around the pub to find some guys who looked like that had been their intention.

“Why not think like that? We´re young and beautiful”, she stated.

“Yeah I think that´s the point. If this pub would be legal, we couldn´t even entered it legally. We´re too young to think like that”, I responded angrily.

If that would be all I could get, just a little one night stand with some shabby guy I would rather stay alone and a happy virgin forever.

“You just don´t know how to be young”, Jessica shrugged her shoulders and I was about to stand up and leave the pub and her behind.

She was my best friend and I loved her, but she really annoyed me with her theories about me and my life. Like if she had any idea how my brain worked and how my values were set.

“Oh there they are”, she suddenly squeezed happy and I looked over to where she was pointing.

The firs thing I saw was Niall´s blonde hair and his braces which were revealed as he gave Jess a huge smile. He actually looked pretty nice and he seemed to be just as old as we were.

Finally Jess looked for something in someone who had not been to college already. The other guy was so close to Niall that I could not see anything else than his shoulders.

“Hey Jess”, Niall said with the cutest accent I had ever heard before. His tongued seemed to be glued to his pharynx. As a response Jess stood up in an elegant move and hugged him.

“You´re finally here”, she said excited over the noise and I thought that I had really heard something new to me in these words.

Something excited and nervous. Did she really had a thing for this blonde guy? The other guy behind Niall cleared his throat awkwardly.

“Oh, right...this is Liam”, he introduced him and stepped aside so I could finally have a look at him.

My surprise was immense since I thought about another Irish lad with light hair and blue eyes, but the guy in front of me was the opposite.

He had darker skin which looked like it was sunburned from the sun and his hair was brown. Lighter than mine, but definitely far away from blonde. The light had been to dark to figure out his eye colour, but it seemed to be a dark brown.

He reached out his hand for Jess who looked completely shocked since I knew she was the biggest fan of hugs even at first meetings.

“Nice to meet you”, he said and my last doubts about his origin were washed aside.

He definitely were not from Ireland since his accent proved it to me. We all waited for Jess to introduce me since she came up with this idea, but she seemed to be somehow distracted by Niall´s appearance so I decided to introduce me myself.

“I´m Faye”, I said and reached out to shake Liam´s hand as well. It was warm, but not sweaty and I liked the feeling of their touch on my cold ones.

“Let´s just order some drinks”, Jess said excited and we sat down again. Liam was right to my side and Niall and Jess seemed to be already in a deep talk before the drinks arrived.

On the one hand there were Jess and Niall, flirting and laughing the whole time and on the other there were us, awkward silence between us.

“So, uhm your Niall´s best friend?”, I asked pushed by the feeling of doing anything.

“Kind of, we know each other from school and he said he really needed someone to come with him here tonight”, he answered and the way he raised his shoulders I knew he felt just as uncomfortable as I did.

“Oh alright”, was all I responded and there it was again. Silence.

“And you´re...?”, he asked me, but I could not understand a word. The live band had gotten louder and we were not as close to each other like Jess and Niall were.

“I´m sorry”, I shouted an excuse over the music.

“You´re horny?”, he said and his eyes grew big. Suddenly I had to laugh really loud about this situation.

There we were in a pub, just saw us for the first time minutes ago and he already asked me something like this. This was absurd and I knew it.

“No, I said I´m sorry”, I tried again after I stopped laughing, but he only made a gesture to show me he could not understand a single word I said.

Therefore I looked around and the only escape I could find was the front door so I pointed into that direction and finally we seemed to understand each other.

We both stood up and made our way trough the crowd. The smell of sweat, perfume and cigarettes passed us and I had to cough a little bit.

Liam´s back was the whole time in front of me and I sighed happily as I finally felt the cold night air on my face as we stepped out of the pub.

Therefore I allowed my lungs to finally breathe again and my lungs filled with fresh oxygen for what felt like forever.

“I´m sorry for what I understood in there”, he apologized and I had to smile again.

He looked really embarrassed and I really felt sympathy for him. I dropped down to the pavement and crossed my legs and he awkwardly stood still next to me.

“What was your original question?”, I asked him and he finally sat down next to me.

“I just wanted to know if you´re Jessica´s best friend”, he gave me a small smile and I noticed that he had a really cute smile. It was retained and had therefore its really own kind of beauty.

“I think so. We know each other for our all of our lives so I think we never really had another choice”, I said and had to smile because it was the truth.

If we would have met later I think we would not got close friends just because we were so different personalities.

“You know each other for your whole lives?”, Liam seemed surprised and I nodded yes.

“Our parents are really good friends and we grew up with each other right from the beginning”, I explained and he gave me a jealous look.

“We moved so many times I stopped to count after the sixth time”, he said.

“My Dad´s working for the army”, I said and he glanced over to me.

I had been wrong about his eyes. They were not dark brown, but a lighter colour which kind of reminded me of toffee. They were beautiful and had something really deep and true.

“So you know the feeling of moving and being the new one all the time?”, he asked and I heard some hope in his voice.

“Actually I´ve only moved down the street for once because we had a complete pipe break and my room was more like a swimming pool”, I said.

“Doesn´t sound too good”, he laughed and I enjoyed his laughter which filled the dark night.

Chattering sounds came from inside, but to be honest I liked it outside here thousands time better.

“Do you like partying?”, Liam suddenly asked me and I looked over at him.

For the first time I noticed what he was wearing. A jeans which revealed some part of his boxers and a white shirt under a dark leather jacket. Casual, but chic at the same time just like me.

“Sometimes I like being with friends and having a good time”, I tried to answer while sounding like a normal teenage girl.

“Good answer”, he smiled at me.

“But what do you do in the mean time?” I bit my under lip while I tried to make a decision whether to tell him or do not.

“I like running. The beach is such a beautiful especially in the morning when all you can hear are the waves and the birds and sometimes you cross another runner or someone who is out with their dog and all you chair is a knowing smile because you feel just as free as the other person”, I bubbled and I felt really embarrassed after I had let the words pour out.

Jess had told me once that running in the morning was okay, but talking to boys about it was something really boring and nothing they wanted to talk about, but I really loved it.

“Sounds like a little peace”, was something I did not expected as an answer.

“It is at least to me”, I said with a smile on my face.

This evening was completely different than I had expected it to be. Liam was completely different than most of the guys I knew.

“You´re really different than I had expected you to be like”, he said just like he could read my mind.

“I am?”, I questioned him surprised.

“Niall said Jessica described you as a nice flirt, but you clearly aren´t”, he answered.

A nice flirt? Me? What had Jessica thought? I was everything, but a nice flirt.

“Is that something positive?”, I asked because I was not really sure.

“Oh yeah”, he hurried to say, “you´re a really interesting person.”

I felt my cheeks blush under his words. What was happening here?

“You´re really attentive and that´s something I´ve never really discovered at other persons lately”, I tried to give his compliment back.

We smiled at each other and somehow nothing else mattered to me right now. Not the test tomorrow or the fact that there were always a strange and terrifying feel in my stomach.

“We should probably go and check on our friends”, Liam suggested. I only shrugged my shoulders because I knew they were probably already busy with something else.

“I´d rather stay here”, I said quietly.

“Same here”, he smiled at me and I caught his eyes again. God they were beautiful. What had just happened to me?

Notes